Huntington Family Series

by Rachel Ann Nunes

  Chapter Twenty

  ’d no idea,” Savvy said when she could speak again. “None at all. Lexi talks about him as if he were still alive.”

  Yet now as she thought about it, there had been clues–the way Lexi had come running to Savvy instead of to her beloved Brenton, how Lexi hadn’t known what he was studying in college, how she occasionally talked about him in the past tense.

  Was everything Lexi had led her to believe a lie?

  “I’m sorry,” Tyler said. Savvy wondered if he noticed the gray tinge that had come over Derek’s face.

  Savvy waited, hoping Derek would explain further but unable to ask it of him. At last he nodded, his eyes resting softly on her. “Losing your mother was the worst thing that ever happened to me. My second wife was a mistake, but it took me four years to learn that. When she left me, I wasn’t surprised. I was even glad, though I swear I tried everything to keep us together for Brenton’s sake.”

  “How old was he when you divorced?” Savvy asked, trying to organize a mental picture of her missing brother.

  “Let’s see, about three and a half by then. We had joint custody, but he was mostly with me. It was hard work, taking care of him, but it got easier after I met Juli–that’s Lexi’s mom. She was the best thing that had happened to me in a long time.” He sighed and shook his head. “But I hadn’t learned yet how important family was. I know, I know, I’m a slow learner. We’d been married nine years when Juli left one day when I was at work. Went to Minnesota where she has a sister. It was a real wakeup call.”

  “So you were separated?”

  “Yes.” He leaned forward. “But you have to understand, we were working things out. Losing her like that would have been the second worst thing in my life. I really loved Juli. Still do.”

  Savvy believed him. His feelings transformed his face, giving her a glimpse of the handsome man he’d once been. The man who had loved and wooed her mother.

  “She took Lexi?” she prompted, wanting to hear more. With each passing moment, she felt she knew him better. Was his pain the reason he had reacted so violently to her appearance? Or did he still wish that she’d never come?

  He shook his head. “No. She went alone. You might think that sounds bad, a woman leaving her children, but it was only a visit, at least in the beginning. Lexi had barely started third grade and loved her teacher. Brenton wasn’t going to his mom’s anymore–hadn’t been for a few years. It was almost as if we were a regular family. Juli knew how much I loved the kids and how afraid I was to let them go.” His gaze locked with Savvy’s, and warmth spread through her. All at once she understood why he’d been reluctant to let Lexi and Brenton go. He’d already lost one child: Savvy.

  “Besides,” he added, “Juli was feeling confused, maybe battling depression. She needed to get away from everything for a while. I think that’s why she ended up staying so long.”

  Savvy made herself ask, “So how long did she stay?”

  “Well, two weeks turned into four weeks, and then several months.” He tapped his fingers on the arm of his chair. “Not that I blame her. She needed to be sure what she wanted. And she called all the time and talked to the children–she was more a mother to Brenton than his own ever was. She found a job, got her act together, and after about six months came back to give me an ultimatum–counseling, more time at home, the whole bit, or she’d file for divorce. I agreed to everything.” He shrugged. “I’d learned by then that I wasn’t happy without her. None of us were.”

  “So that’s when the plane went down?” Tyler asked. “On the way back?”

  Derek shook his head. “No, later. She came here for a visit, and when she realized I was serious about us, she decided to go back to Minnesota, quit her job, get her things, and come back. She wanted to take Lexi with her, but Lexi was furious at her for leaving in the first place. She didn’t see why Juli had to go back at all, and she threw a fit. Even at eight, that child could hold a grudge. But Brenton, he was easier. He loved Juli and wasn’t afraid to show it. Other fifteen-year-olds were unhappy about having their mothers around, but he wasn’t like that with Juli. He saw how hurt her feelings were when Lexi refused, so he went with her instead. They were there two weeks.” Derek gave a brief laugh that held no mirth. “She even got baptized into the Church. That was one of the things she went back for, and one of the conditions of us getting back together–that I take her to church.”

  “She was a member?” Savvy couldn’t hold back her surprise. “I didn’t know that. Lexi never said.”

  “It was a long time ago.” Derek leaned forward again, both feet flat on the carpet, elbows resting on his knees. “Juli heard the gospel from some missionaries her sister set her up with in Minnesota. Brenton was even baptized. Had to call me for permission. The next day they flew home. They never made it.” The words seemed to come without effort, but Derek’s eyes glistened with tears, and he was so pale Savvy worried that he might have a relapse of whatever had put him in the hospital.

  “I’m so sorry,” she whispered. Tentatively, she stretched out her hand toward him. Would he reject her again? Would he jab his finger at the door and order her to leave? It didn’t matter. Savvy knew she had to try. As her hand touched the arm of his chair, his fingers wrapped around hers, holding on as though he would never let go.

  “It could have been worse,” Derek said in a low voice. “Lexi could have been with them.”

  “Thank heaven,” Savvy breathed, biting her bottom lip to stop herself from crying.

  Derek’s mouth twitched upward at the comment, but he shook his head. “She’s never forgotten that she was supposed to be on that plane instead of Brenton.”

  Savvy took a swift breath as she made the connection. So that was why Lexi blamed herself for her brother’s death. “Oh, no.”

  Derek nodded. “It’s been difficult for her, but I thought she was going to be all right. But now that she needs to go to Minnesota, it’s all cropped up again.”

  “Why Minnesota if she’s so set against it?” Tyler asked. Savvy glanced at him gratefully. Already she was too involved in this man’s life to think objectively. “I mean, if it’s a matter of jobs, you could find another one, right?”

  Derek looked at Tyler for a few seconds without replying. Savvy had the feeling that the move to Minnesota was more important than a job. There was something more, something deeper. Something Lexi would rather run from than face.

  Was it the same something that had caused Derek to react so violently at first seeing Savvy? For that there was still no explanation, though he showed no trace of that horrible man now. Savvy could almost believe it hadn’t happened.

  Whatever his reasons might be–for either the move or his actions–Derek didn’t seem ready to share. His gaze dropped briefly to the armrest where he clutched Savvy’s outstretched hand. He patted it softly before letting it go and rising to his feet. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I can find another solution. But right now I think it’s time I check on Lexi. She’s probably calmed down now. Afterward, maybe we can have dinner.”

  “I can make something.” Savvy practically leapt to her feet. “Or better yet, we’ll go out.”

  “How about take-out?” Tyler suggested, rising from the couch. He caught her gaze and looked purposefully at Derek. “We could pick up something while you talk to Lexi.”

  Savvy followed his gaze, studying the man who had helped give her life. What did Tyler want her to see? Derek looked much older than her own parents, more fragile, though his hair was still full and blond, and his grip strong. But he’d had a collapse and been in the hospital. Tyler was right; he was in no condition to go to a restaurant.

  “Take-out sounds good,” she offered. “What do you feel like?”

  “Anything’s fine.” Derek appeared relieved.

  “Lexi likes Mexican food. Is there a restaurant nearby?”

  After Derek gave them directions, Savvy followed Tyler out to the Jeep. “Will she be okay, do you think?” s
he asked as he started the engine.

  “Yeah. I think so.” Tyler’s smile was gone now, and he looked sad.

  “What is it?” She bumped his elbow so he would look at her instead of the house.

  He shook his head. “I don’t know. It’s just . . . Lexi has lied about so many, many things. Yet, now that I hear what happened, I understand why. I feel sorry for her.”

  “Me too. Living with all that guilt about her mother and Brenton. I can’t imagine that.” Again, Savvy felt a rush of remorse at never knowing her half brother. “At least it doesn’t look like Derek’s been physically abusing her.”

  “I don’t think so either,” Tyler agreed. “Still, she was gone a whole week, and he didn’t know.”

  “I won’t let that happen again.” Savvy sat back in her seat. “Whether she admits it or not, she needs me.” Then she added more quietly, “They both do.”

  “No way,” Tyler said, shaking his head. “Not him. He doesn’t need you. Savvy, you barely know this man. You can’t let yourself get wrapped up in his life. You saw the way he yelled at you when we first got here. You heard what he said.”

  “I heard what he said about my adoption, too. I heard what he said about Lexi’s mother. He loved her.”

  “Well, he made his choices; you can’t change that.”

  “I know, but I can at least try to have a relationship with him. I want to. Tyler, I know he’s not really my father anymore, but he is a part of me. Try to understand that.”

  “I do. Or at least I think I do. But how do you know he wants the same thing?”

  “I–I guess I don’t.”

  Tyler took both her hands, and Savvy felt a jolt of shock run up her arms. She tried to pull away, but he held on. “Look, Savvy, I didn’t want to tell you, but before, when you were in here in the Jeep, he said he’d explain everything to us, but only if I promised to take you away afterward.”

  “Take me away?” Savvy’s heart ached.

  “Of course, whatever happens here is your choice. I’m not going to drag you away. Still, I don’t think you should stay here.”

  “I’m not planning on staying–at least not long.”

  “Good. I don’t want to see you throw away your dreams at the whim of an old man.”

  That made her smile, despite the ache in her heart. “He’s not an old man. Goodness, Tyler. He can’t be older than his late forties. Stop worrying. I’m thinking maybe I can help him and Lexi work out whatever problems they have, that’s all.” Even as she said it, Savvy wondered what would happen when everything was resolved. Would her relationship with Lexi be limited to e-mailing her in Minnesota? And what about Derek?

  “Except . . .” She trailed off.

  “What?”

  She shrugged. “I don’t know. I’ve sort of gotten used to having Lexi around. And I’m really worried about her. Guilt can eat you inside out.”

  “Tell me about it.” The way he said it made her look at him more closely. His hair was longer than he usually wore it, and his eyes under his glasses were slightly bloodshot, though that was easily explained by their long drive. Other than that, he seemed like the old Tyler. Except maybe, just maybe, there was something different in those green eyes, something that made a shock go up her arms when he touched her hands.

  “What do you know about guilt?” she asked.

  He gave her an enigmatic stare. “Believe me, I know.” With that he put the Jeep in gear and drove away.

  * * *

  Lexi waited in her bedroom on the edge of her twin bed. She knew he was coming; he always did when she made a scene. While her chest was still tight, there was also a strange sort of relief. The time had come to make her plea openly, to assert her agency. But would her father listen?

  Her eyes wandered around the room. Her dresser, her fan-backed wicker chair, her cedar chest were all strewn with clothing, her various treasures, and schoolbooks–all much messier than she would have left it. Amber must have had herself a good time, Lexi thought with a smile.

  Her favorite piece of furniture was the tall bookshelf, packed so full of books that she’d had to double up on some rows, making them stick out kind of funny. Her dad had been worried about it tipping over, so he’d attached it to the wall with fasteners.

  Besides the mess, everything was the same as she’d left it, except smaller somehow. After being at Savvy’s parents’ house in American Fork and in the new room in Sandy, she’d realized that her house was rather small and rather dingy. Not that it mattered since she wasn’t going to be here long. Long enough to pack and clear away a week’s worth of dust.

  Lexi’s chest tightened almost unbearably. Maybe she was having a heart attack. Did teenagers even have heart attacks?

  Her door opened at last, and her dad stood there regarding her gravely. He’d looked old and frail in the living room, but he was tall and strong now. “We need to talk, Pumpkin.”

  She nodded, allowing her heart to warm the tiniest bit at the sight of him. He was using her nickname. That was a good sign that he wasn’t angry anymore. “Okay.”

  He sat in her wicker chair, moving a pair of faded jeans to the floor. He pulled the chair closer. “Well?”

  She shrugged. He didn’t normally ask her to start their conversations, so she wondered if he could tell that she was older than last week, well able to take care of herself. Maybe that would make all the difference.

  “So you don’t want to go to Minnesota,” he said.

  “I told you before. She’s old. I don’t want to go there.”

  “I’m old.” He smiled, and it made Lexi mad.

  “Not as old as she is,” she retorted. “All her kids are gone. She’s old and mean, and she hates me.” Lexi looked down at her hands.

  “Your aunt doesn’t hate you. She’s your mother’s sister–why would she hate you? And you have to go there so she can take care of you.”

  “Did you tell Savvy and Tyler you’re giving me away?” Lexi lifted her eyes to glare at him.

  “I’m not giving you away!”

  “Oh?” Lexi put on her best sarcastic face. “So you’re going with me?”

  He didn’t reply, but there was a hurt in his eyes that reprimanded her more thoroughly than words ever could. Wishing she could take back the words, Lexi stood up from her bed and climbed onto his lap. He gave a little sigh and nestled his chin in her hair in the way that told her he loved her best and most of all. Tears stung her eyes. Why did it all have to be so complicated? She put her arms around his neck. “I love you, Daddy.”

  His arms tightened, making her feel warm and safe. “I love you too, Pumpkin.”

  Now’s the time, she thought. Aloud she said, “I have a plan.”

  He choked out something that faintly resembled a laugh. “Oh? Like the one that took you to California?”

  “Not that far.” She took an arm from his neck and hit him on the shoulder.

  “How far.”

  “Just to Utah. I want Tyler to take care of me.”

  “Tyler?”

  Lexi smiled. She’d surprised him. “Tyler’s family takes in orphaned children. Or abandoned ones,” she added softly.

  His lips tightened. “You are not abandoned.”

  Not yet, she thought.

  “What about Savannah–Savvy?” he prompted.

  Lexi knew he wanted to know why she didn’t want to live with Savvy, but she purposely misunderstood his question. “You were rude when you yelled at her.”

  “I didn’t want to drag her into all this. It’s tough enough for us. But now that I’ve talked to her some, I think I might have reacted too quickly. She’s . . . well, special. I can see why you brought her all this way.”

  Lexi rolled her eyes. “Actually, she brought me.”

  “Either way. I’m surprised you didn’t ask to live with her.”

  She couldn’t avoid the issue any longer. She had to convince him. “She’s okay, but Tyler’s used to a lot of kids. His family likes to have them around
.”

  “So you think he’d make a good guardian?”

  She nodded, daring to let herself hope. “If I have to go somewhere”–she glanced at him to see if he might change his mind, but his jaw was firm–“then I’d rather go to Utah than to California where Savvy lives or to Minnesota.” Of course, there still was the matter of getting Tyler to back off from Savvy, especially if he ended up moving to California, but she had an idea for that.

  “I don’t know, Lexi.”

  “At least try to get to know him. You’ll see that I’m right.”

  “Well, I guess I can promise that much.”

  She hugged him hard. “Thanks, Daddy.”

  “No, thank you,” he said. “I’ve wanted so much to . . .” His voice became hoarse, and he couldn’t continue.

  “To see what she was like?”

  He nodded. “I’ve wondered about her. I thought I’d never get to see her. But here she is. Thanks to you.” Lexi felt a gladness in her heart that she could do this much for him.

  “Did you tell her?” she asked. “Then she’d understand why you yelled.”

  He swallowed hard as tears gathered in his eyes. “How could I? I could barely tell you.”

  For the first time Lexi caught a glimpse of what her father must be going through–and she felt frightened.

  She hugged him hard. “It’s going to be okay, Daddy. It’s going to be okay.”

  If only she could believe her own words.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Savvy was feeling anxious by the time she and Tyler returned to the house. What if things hadn’t gone well between Lexi and Derek? What if Lexi had run away again? She scanned the street for any sign of her sister. But she saw only trees, cars, houses, and two children playing ball in a front yard.

  Tyler put his hand on hers. “Relax, okay? It’ll be all right.”

  “You know, I don’t think Lexi would run away because her dad told her she couldn’t date a boy or because she doesn’t want to move. I mean, she’d understand if he had to move for his job. So what’s the deal?”