Grace: A Disgrace Trilogy Novel

by Dee Palmer

  “Charming.” I roll my eyes before casting a quick glance down. Since he isn’t the only one to remark this, I have to wonder if I’ve got a Dolly Parton thing going on, but I can’t see it. “I’ve checked your cupboards and you have zero food, so are we getting takeout or are you taking me out?”

  “You’re not leaving?”

  “Did I stutter?”

  “Cute.” He narrows his eyes, his mouth is sporting a wide smile. “Takeout…I’m knackered. You choose what to eat, while I grab a shower…or you could join me.” He waggles his brow playfully, and I laugh out loud.

  “Tease.”

  “I don’t tease,” he states, but before any awkwardness descends, he shrugs off his comment and continues. “I look forward to you making my ears bleed with tales of the wedding and your sprog.” He points an accusatory finger at my tummy, and my arm flies across my midsection in a protective gesture.

  “Take that back! I am not carrying a sprog.” I can’t hide my disgust, and he chuckles.

  “It’s a girl then, is it? Okay then sprogette.”

  “Gah!” I screw up the newspaper and throw it at his departing body. It barely touches his shoulder but he does stop and casts a grin my way.

  “Losing your touch already, Mistress,” he goads.

  “I still have my whip, Leon.”

  “Glad to hear it.”

  “We don’t know the sex. What I do know though, is if you insult my baby again, you won’t be glad…I promise you that.” I grit out, adding my own lioness growl after my words.

  “You’re retired remember, so now who’s teasing?” He steps quickly through to his bedroom before I can retaliate. Incorrigible.

  Sam makes a mad dash across the narrow cobbled alleyway to where I’m parked. The rain is torrential and her thick wool coat has no hood, so she has it perched over her head for temporary cover. Squealing, she throws herself into the car along with a wave of London’s finest winter weather. She shucks her coat from her head and launches across the centre console to kiss me.

  “Hmm… missed you.” Sighing, she collapses back into the seat. She gives a whole body shiver which I don’t believe is a result of our kiss. Even with that short distance, her face was like ice pressed to mine. I blast the heaters and switch on her seat to gently toast her sexy arse.

  “Is that so?” I waggle my brow, my chest warming with the sentiment I happily reciprocate tenfold. I flick the indicator and nudge the car out into the dense traffic, pulling out onto the main street to start our crawl across central London.

  “God, yes. Stupid work stopping us from lying in bed and fucking all day.” She grins and grumbles.

  “Preaching to the choir, beautiful.” I tap my cheek for another kiss, she wrestles with her seat belt and happily obliges, adding a few light kisses along my jaw for good measure. Yeah, I missed her too. “Did you talk to them about your hours?”

  “I did, but we still can’t stay home all day fucking…unless you’re quitting too?” She sighs with mock sadness and pouts.

  “You quit?” I blurt out, my intonation more hopeful than shocked.

  “No…not exactly.” She shifts on her side to face me, kicking her boots to the footwell and tucking her feet beneath her. “We agreed to switch my contract to pro rata, so I get paid hourly now. It’s not like I have any cases of my own. I’m still pretty much the nerd research girl. Anyway, I spent the morning with my boss going over how it would work exactly, and they have set me up so I have remote access. I can now work from anywhere, whatever hours I choose. I think I’ll still be full-time for a few months yet, but I can cut back whenever without it being a headache for them. I’m stoked they went for it, and if I’m honest, more than a little relieved.” Her face beams with a bright, wide smile, even so, I can still see her eyes hold a wealth of concern. Her features are etched with the deep-seated worry I share, but have no intention of letting her carry the burden alone.

  “That’s amazing, although I’m not surprised they would try and accommodate you. You’re an asset, and finding good workers is like the Holy Grail for any business. It’s all about the employees, and now, for the sake of a little compromise, they have one sexy, intelligent, and hugely loyal staff member.” I tell her as a matter of fact because it is the truth.

  “My boss did mention the sexy thing was really important,” she teases with a playful roll of her eyes.

  “Cute.” I reach over and squeeze her knee, sliding my hand aggressively to the top of her thigh and increasing my firm grip. Her breath catches, and she shivers, only this time, I know it’s not from the cold. I pause a moment, my fingertips pressing her soft flesh, but all too soon, I have to return my hand to the wheel and try to focus on the rush hour traffic. “Did you manage to speak to Sofia?”

  “I managed to have lunch” She bounces her knees with excitement. “She’s like a wedding planner force majeure. You weren’t far off, saying all I had to do was turn up.”

  “Are you happy with what she’s arranged?” I can see she is, it’s just with so much going on, I need to make sure.

  “It’s perfect actually.” Her smile is shy, and her voice is a soft whisper. She can’t contain that amazing smile, though. Straight, white teeth dazzle behind her slick, red lipstick, which slashes a perfect curve across her flawless face. “It’s exactly what I would’ve picked, a small country hotel with close friends and family. She showed me a schedule, the flowers, photographer, and she’s even sorted the cake!” she exclaims and clasps her hands together, her whole body bubbles with joy, and now, my own smile matches hers, her happiness is infectious and addictive. She rambles on, and I take in every word. “The wedding dress won’t need altering because it’s still too early for any significant change, and I know I haven’t gained any weight. She’s even sorted a little pampering in the morning for me…hair, make-up…a princess package, if you will.”

  “You don’t need a princess package to look like royalty, but as long as you’re happy?” I repeat my question.

  “I’m very, very happy,” she states emphatically and nods her head as extra clarification, her whole demeanour resolute, and I relax. I love it when a plan comes together.

  “You might want to check the dress, though, because your tits are definitely bigger.” My eyes dip to her chest. She gasps and slaps her hand on my shoulder, only I wasn’t joking, and her brows furrow.

  “Really?” She tips her chin right down and pulls the turtleneck of her sweater as far down as possible to have a peak. “Hmm.” She lets the material snap back and traces a path down the front of her sweater with her hands, her fingers circling her nipples, which are tiny bumps beneath the ribbed material. Her hands grip and squeeze, lift and mould as she fondles herself. I nearly swerve the car off the road when she drops her head back and moans. Fuck! Her lips part and a soft sigh escapes. I grip the steering wheel with white-knuckle force, a second away from parking the damn car and pulling her onto my lap, regardless of the thousands of commuters pounding the pavement just outside the car. Just as suddenly, she snickers and drops her hands to her lap, folding them neatly and batting her lashes innocently at me. She can’t maintain that façade for long because her eyes are drawn to the aching bulge in my trousers. I shift but gain no relief.

  “Happy?” My voice is hoarse because my throat is dry.

  “Lil’ bit.” She pinches her thumb and forefinger to indicate no distance at all then wiggles her brows.

  “Oh you are going to pay for that.” My voice is deep, and my tone is crystal clear with absolute certainty.

  “Now I’m definitely happy.” Her breathy response does fuck-all to help my hellish hard-on.

  We sit in the spacious waiting room of the antenatal department of the private maternity hospital. It feels more like a hotel lounge, with sumptuous sofas, a large flat-screen television, serving tea and tiny cakes laid out on the low table. I’m surprisingly nervous. No, it’s not surprising. Sam has had more than her fair share of trauma in her life, and wh
at Richard did all those years ago has come back to haunt us both. I pull her hand into my lap and cover my other hand over the top of hers

  “It’s going to be fine.” I state calmly.

  “It might not be, Jason.” Her voice is agitated and a little high-pitched. “I know you want to fix things and make everything right, just don’t put so much pressure on yourself or me,” she pleads, and I hate the uncertainty that is consuming all her confidence. She draws in a deep breath and lets it out slowly. “Whatever happens, we will deal, together.” The next breath she draws is shaky. I hear the brave words yet her face is anything but. She’s really worried about this.

  “We will, Sam, together—you, me and my baby.” I spear one of my hands into her hair and hold a firm fistful of her locks, so she’s looking directly in my eyes. I hold her gaze for long seconds, hoping she can feel every ounce of sincerity in my words.

  “Our baby,” she corrects me with a grin.

  “Our baby…but mostly mine.” I nudge her, and she falls against my chest with a soft laugh.

  “I love you, Jason, just in case you didn’t know,” she mutters into the material of my shirt. I am stroking her hair with one hand, and the other is still holding her hand.

  “Well, you haven’t told me since this morning, so I was beginning to worry.”

  “Mr and Mrs Sinclair.” The nurse pokes her head around the doorway, and Sam tilts her head up to see me looking down, her perfectly shaped brow arches high.

  “Thought it would save on the paperwork.” I tap the end of her nose.

  “Oh you did, did you?” She stands and straightens her skirt, her tight expression not the least affronted at my presumption. She offers her hand for me to take, which I do, only to pull her into my embrace as soon as I stand.

  “Certificate or not, beautiful, you’re already mine and always will be.” I don’t whisper, I proclaim, and I’d happily shout it to the world, although that isn’t necessary because the only person that counts can hear me perfectly clear.

  “You say the sweetest things.” She fails to bite back her smile, and her cheeks flash an adorable pink.

  “Don’t I though?” I tug her to my side as I stride out the door and follow the nurse into a consulting room.

  The baby and the scanner were both acting up and the doctor was unable to get a satisfactory reading, which was not what either of us really needed to hear, but the physician was very comforting. There was a strong heartbeat, and Sam is fit and healthy. Sam discussed her concerns, and I voiced mine, which were mostly regarding her need to take it easy. Sam’s were more explicit and even I got a little hot when, after a very detailed, lengthy list, that wouldn’t look out of place on a Dom/sub list of preferences, Sam asked if rough anal would be a problem. I was impressed the doctor didn’t bat an eyelid at her question even if he did cast me a curious look. Yes, I was the insatiable monster in this relationship.

  “It’s not him.” She rushes to defend my honour, catching just a glimpse of the doctor’s expression before it reverted to blankly professional. “It’s me…well both of us. We are both extremely…” She pauses as if she’s now choosing to censor herself. I bite back a throaty laugh. A little late for that. “Active.” She beams at me, I keep my lips tight, smiling as much as I can. God, she’s adorable, and she seems pleased that her brain-to-mouth filter is kicking in. “I just want to be sure.” She turns back to me, her expression more serious.

  “I know, beautiful, me too.” I pull her hand to my lips and kiss her fingertips. The doctor voices his understanding.

  “And you are quite right to ask, if you have any uncertainty. I can assure you, very little shocks me.”

  “Oh please don’t tempt her,” I groan out and the doctor laughs, a hearty sound. I see the gleam in Sam’s eyes, and I really wasn’t joking.

  The doctor shuffles his papers and closes Sam’s thin patient folder that we have spent the last thirty minutes filling in. “I’m sorry about the scanner not working properly. If you can come back tomorrow after ten in the morning we will be able to give you another one and—”

  “I’m not available tomorrow.” My tone is clipped and irritated even though I know it’s no one’s fault. I just wanted to be there.

  “I can wait.” She squeezes my hand.

  “No. I want you to have it done sooner rather than later.” I shake my head at her offer. “I will make sure I’m there for the next one just get a picture okay?”

  “You sure?” She checks again but I can see the relief in her face. She doesn’t want to wait and I don’t blame her.

  “There will be other scans?” I turn to the doctor, but my question comes out more like an accusation and he looks startled.

  “Of course, at least two. If you want more, we can surely accommodate you.” He seems eager to appease but I’m feeling all kinds of unreasonable. “I understand this is an especially anxious time for you both, so anything we can do to make the pregnancy stress-free, we will.” He really is trying now, and I shrug off my petty irritation and focus on the bigger picture, Sam.

  “Okay then.” I capitulate with a slight nod and turn my gaze to Sam. “I want you to come tomorrow, it’s important.”

  “It is.” She lets out a sigh that doesn’t really ease her tension, but then, I wonder if anything will until, like she said, our baby is in our arms.

  “Right, make the appointment, and when do we see you next? Is it next week or in a few days?” I address the doctor who just looks confused. I really wasn’t asking a difficult question.

  “Oh no…next month is fine.” He waves his hand in a dismissive gesture.

  “Really? Are you sure?” Now it’s my turn to look confused.

  “Perfectly.” The doctor smiles warmly at Sam. “Mrs Sinclair will be sick to death of us if we see her more than she needs, trust me. If there are any problems, call us straight away, other than that, your next appointment will be next month.” He hands Sam a card with the date of the appointment and a list of emergency numbers, including his.

  “Oh, very well.” My brow furrows because this doesn’t sound right. Doesn’t he realize how precious they both are? A month feels like a really long time.

  “It will be fine.” Sam’s sweet voice and the teasing shake of her head bring me out of my worry. “I’m fine. We’re fine. And a month will fly by.” She stands and shakes the doctor’s hand, thanking him, and I do the same. I don’t feel nearly as grateful, bloody machine not working and then abandoning my wife and child for a month.

  We leave the consulting room, walk the length of the corridor, and back out through the waiting room when she speaks.

  “You know you’re super sexy and adorable when you go all alpha papa on me.” She lifts my arm and drapes it over her shoulder, snuggling against my side, and I cloak her body with mine.

  “I’m not happy with the month thing. Do you think that’s normal?” I grumble.

  “I have no idea.” She giggles and wraps her arms a little tighter around my waist. “I’ll buy a book tomorrow. Needless to say though, I do feel much better having talked to the doctor.”

  “You do?” Her face twists to look up at me.

  “Oh yeah.” Her voice dips low with delicious intent, and my mind and cock are instantly recalling that list she recited in the doctor’s office.

  “About that list…” I growl.

  “What about that list?” Her lips begin to tip and crawl into a devious smile.

  “Which part of it do you think would be sufficient punishment for your behaviour in the car?” My voice is thick with latent lust, and my breath kisses her lips. She parts them a little, just enough to let her tongue dampen and tease.

  “Oh…that was very bad.” She feigns her sternest voice. “I think that warrants skipping the list and going straight to the rough anal.”

  “Now who says the sweetest things?” I crush the wicked smile right off her lips with my own urgent, demanding mouth.

  I have been locked in sensitive
meetings all morning and left a strict do-not-disturb instruction with Sandy unless it was Sam, but I didn’t need to say that. We are at a critical stage in negotiations, and I know Daniel is keen for me to secure the sale, and I am pretty incentivized too. The bonus attached to such a lucrative deal should be just enough to pay for my wedding gift for Sam.

  Sandy’s raised voice from outside causes a wave of unease in the room, and all eyes dart to the door as it crashes open. James bursts through with Sandy tugging on his arm to try and pull him back. He straightens and fixes me with a knowing stare that makes my heart freeze, his face cracks with a triumphant smile. “I’ve got him!”

  “You didn’t have to come. It’s so fucking early, Sofs. Really, the only time anyone should be up at this hour is because they are going on holiday.” Sofia stifles a second yawn, waving her hand, dismissing my comment.

  “Don’t be silly. I’m an early bird, I just yawn a lot for the first hour or so.” She laughs and starts another face stretching yawn that sets me off too. It’s just after 5:30, and I have borrowed Jason’s car because we have a lot of miles to cover. We are heading down south to pick up my wedding dress and then doing a quick U-turn and driving the three hundred miles north to Derbyshire, our wedding venue and hotel for the weekend. Jason’s parents live nearby, and we have a small family meal planned tonight so I can at least meet them before the big day tomorrow. I understand Will flew over yesterday and is already staying with them.

  “Is Paul coming up tonight?” I ask for the third time, turning the radio down this time. The heaters are still blasting the morning chill from the interior of the car, and I don’t want to have to keep repeating myself.