Undercover Sheriff

by Barbara Phinney

  He reminded himself that he wasn’t a bug trapped in a glass. He was a man in control of his life. Adam had not come to the decision to seek a mail-order bride lightly. And, he’d made a good choice. This awkward phase would pass and things would settle just as he’d pictured. Eugene and Catherine would have a mother. A home full of the comforts that had been missing since Sarah had died two years ago.

  And Adam would be helping Millie, too. That was what he had liked the most about her. When he had mentioned the idea of a mail-order bride, word had spread through town. He wasn’t the first man to find a wife that way, but people seemed to enjoy talking about it nonetheless.

  Based on some of the other local men’s experiences, Adam had anticipated months of corresponding with different women, trying to decide from words on paper whether the woman would be the help his children needed or a mistake. Another mistake.

  Then, Mr. Carter had come all the way out to the farm to talk to Adam. Mr. Carter’s sister was married to a pastor outside of Saint Louis. She had just written about a young woman who needed a husband. This woman—Millie—was recently widowed and pregnant. Her husband had been deep in debt at the time of his death, and Millie had found herself completely destitute. Alone. Homeless. Though she was staying with friends from church, Millie was looking for a husband. Somewhere to go.

  And Adam had an empty room and the need for a wife.

  Of course Adam’s heart had hurt for the woman who had been through so much already. His heart also hurt for his children who were similarly suffering through no fault of their own. They could help each other and maybe ease some of the pain all around.

  Please, God, let that be true. I need my children to be happy. Well cared for. I want them to grow up in the kind of home I had.

  “How far is it? To your home, I mean.”

  Adam couldn’t tell from her tone of voice whether she was genuinely curious or just trying to fill the silence between him. Either one was fine. They needed to work from where they were and go up. Build something.

  “It’s your home now, too, you know. And it’s not too far, about forty-five minutes from town.”

  “Forty-five minutes is not too far?”

  Adam turned to look at her. “I always thought forty-five minutes was close to town, at least for this part of the country. How close to Saint Louis was your farm?”

  “My farm? The farm I was staying at after my husband died?”

  Millie’s voice was slow and hesitant, and Adam felt his stomach harden with dread.

  “I was asking about the farm you and your husband had before he died.”

  Millie’s eyes widened in something that looked an awful lot like panic. She sat very still, her body not moving despite the jostling of the buggy. “I didn’t live on a farm before my husband died.”

  Adam felt his own body freeze. “Where did you live?”

  “In the city. In Saint Louis. My husband owned a store there, and I helped him.”

  “How about before that? You were raised on a farm, right?” Yes. The answer had to be yes. One of the things that had made Sarah try to leave was the isolation of life on the farm. Adam had tried marrying a city woman unfamiliar with farm life, and it had been a disaster. Surely he hadn’t made the same mistake with his second marriage. But he hadn’t actually asked, had he? He’d just seen the ranch address of the home where she was staying and he’d assumed.

  Millie’s eyes stayed wide this time, large and frightened in her pale face. “I was born in the city. In Saint Louis. I lived there every day of my life until the debt collectors took the house after my husband died. I only lived at the Keller ranch for the last month.”

  Adam clenched his jaw and forced himself to keep his eyes on the road ahead. The path that they were going to have to go down. They were married. This was their road to travel together. And suddenly every bump in it felt more like hitting a boulder. His fingers were white and numb around the reins, and he forced himself to relax his grip. The last thing they needed was for the horses to react to his anger.

  He went through the events that had led to his second marriage to a second city woman. He had been a fool yet again. And he was trapped, yet again. But, just because Millie was not familiar with farm life did not mean she would hate it like Sarah had. He just needed to show Millie all the farm had to offer. He could still have a full partner in the day-to-day activities of farm life.

  “Did you like where you were staying at before you came here?”

  Millie’s smile was small but it was there. “I did. I mean, I didn’t really get out much. I spent a lot of the time alone in my room, thinking. But I liked what I did see. It was so different at first from what I was used to, but it was really nice. Almost soothing.”

  Adam could work with that. “Then I think you’ll like our home, too.”

  “I’m sure I will. I’ve been looking forward to the peace and quiet, to be honest.”

  Millie sounded sincere. Almost eager to prove that statement correct. She was trying. Millie had come into this marriage with the same goals as Adam. A good future for their children. And Millie was obviously trying to hold up her end of the bargain. That was all Adam could hope for.

  Surely this could work if they both tried. “There’s plenty of quiet. But, there’s also a whole lot of not quiet. Between the children and the animals, sometimes I think the country is noisier than the city.”

  “You’ve lived in a city before?”

  “Yes. But, not for too long. It never felt like home.”

  That was an understatement. Adam had been miserable in the city. He had hated the way it felt. The way it smelled. The way it seemed to settle on his skin like a coating he could never completely wash off. Having gone through that feeling of not fitting and not belonging, having fled that, how had he not understood what Sarah was going through?

  “So you came back here?”

  Adam nodded. “I wanted to settle down. Have children. And I wanted my children to grow up in the country, with fresh air and room to be.”

  “Children.” This time, Adam didn’t have a bit of trouble picking out the fear in Millie’s voice. “Will you tell me about them? Please? I remember everything you told me in the letter. What Mrs. Thompson told me. But, I’d like to hear more. I need to be as prepared as possible before meeting them in person.”

  This was safe territory. His marriage to Sarah might have ended in disaster, but his children were nothing but joy. “They’re great kids. I know I told you that in the letter, and I’m definitely biased, but they are. Catherine, the five-year-old, has such a kind heart. She always wants to be helpful.”

  Adam’s throat tightened, but he continued. He wanted Millie to give his children what they needed. “Caty just wants to be loved. She spends a lot of time doing things to please people so they will like her. Love her.”

  Adam looked at Millie, to see if he could tell what she was thinking. She was staring at her hands, and her profile wasn’t giving him any hints. “Genie—Eugene—is three. He’s happy so long as he has two things to bang together. It doesn’t matter at all what they are. Two forks. Two blocks. Two of anything so long as he can crash them into one another and make noise.”

  Millie’s hands moved from her lap to her mouth. She turned and looked at him. There was definitely a smile under there. Adam couldn’t stop his own grin. He wasn’t exaggerating his little boy’s love of crashing and making noise. Though it could become aggravating, it was mainly adorable.

  “They sound wonderful.”

  “They are. Don’t misunderstand me, they are children. They can be cross and demanding and ungrateful. And, don’t ever try to reason with them because I promise you you’ll lose your mind before they understand your point. Even if it is eminently logical.”

  Millie laughed out loud at that. Hearing the sound made the
embarrassment of admitting his parenting failure completely worth it.

  “What did you try to reason with them about?”

  “Oh, too many things to count. You’d think I would learn, but I just keep hoping that they’ll see my point. Eventually.”

  “I think you might have a long wait. I’m not an expert when it comes to children, but I have a feeling that logic is one of the last things to develop.”

  Adam told her more about the kids, enjoying both reliving the memories and sharing them with someone else. It was such a shame that the happiness Caty and Genie brought to the world was shared only with him. But, that would change now that Millie was here.

  “Will you tell me about the routine?” Millie’s question was almost abrupt.

  “Routine?”

  “Yes. How does the day go where you live? I want to know what to expect. Make sure I do the right thing in the right order.”

  Adam looked at Millie, trying yet again to read her face.

  There was nothing he could decipher, though her face was lovely, as it had been from the moment he first saw her. Framed by dark brown hair with a slight wave. Brown eyes. Fair complexion with a trail of freckles across her nose and cheeks. Her cheeks had been slightly pink since yesterday. Adam didn’t know if that was from nerves or excitement or if her cheeks usually had that tint. Regardless, she was a beautiful woman.

  But not exactly readable. She might come in a pretty package, but it didn’t take a genius to see that a beautiful, collected facade was exactly what Millie Steele—now Beale—presented to the world. She sure kept everything else locked down tight.

  Except when Adam moved his gaze from her face down to her hands, he saw that they were clenched tight. Her fingers were white around the edges from the pressure. That was not a casual question.

  Lord, I feel like I’m trying to walk through mud here. I can’t find solid ground. I just want to cross this passage and get to the good land on the other side. Help me say the right things, be the right thing. Please.

  “There’s not too much of right and wrong out on the farm. A lot of what gets done is determined by the weather and current status of crops and livestock.”

  “Farm? I thought you lived on a ranch?”

  “Well, it’s a bit of both. I grew up on a ranch, so I consider myself a born-and-raised rancher. And, we have quite a bit of livestock. Cattle and horses. But, it’s also a nice little farm. I have a variety of crops planted. Plus, we have chickens, hogs and a couple of dairy cattle.”

  Adam knew he had failed as a husband the first time around. Sometimes, he questioned whether he was a good enough father to his children. But, he was proud of what he had accomplished with his land. It had taken years, but he finally felt like he was established. His cattle and horses had a growing reputation and provided enough income to live on. The amount of land planted in crops was also expanding.

  “I barely know anything about living on a ranch. Or a farm.”

  Millie’s mask was good, but her hands were still clenched. He had not managed to put her at ease at all. Adam fought the urge to touch her. Reassure her.

  Then he stopped fighting. He was determined that this was going to be a good marriage. He might not want the intimate aspects of having a wife, but he did want a friendship. He wanted his children to be surrounded by love. Companionship. Adam transferred the reins to one hand and used the other to reach out and touch Millie’s arm. He tried to make his touch safe and comforting.

  “I can teach you anything you need to know. I told you I lived in the city for a bit. I have a good understanding of what you’re used to. The farm won’t be that different. Day-to-day life inside a home is pretty much the same everywhere.”

  Millie nodded her head and smiled. But, her hands were still clenched like she was clinging on to something for dear life.

  Adam drew his hand back, unsure yet again whether he had helped at all. He sure didn’t feel like he had lessened her fears.

  Copyright © 2017 by Victoria Austin

  ISBN-13: 9781488017582

  Undercover Sheriff

  Copyright © 2017 by Barbara Phinney

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