by Erin Osborne
“You’re really that sure of yourself, aren’t you?” she asks, not giving me the answer I want, but I’ll take it.
“Yep. You’ll see I’m right and we’ll move on without another word about it,” I tell her, placing one more kiss on her shoulder and leaving the room to pack my bag.
Riley already has the diaper bag packed, with an extra bag with more clothes and different sized diapers. A few pull-ups were thrown in there because we don’t know what stage of potty training, if any, Shelby’s at. The sippy cups are in the dish washer, so they’ll be added as soon as they’re done.
Personally, all I need are a few pairs of jeans, some shirts, and my cut. There’s no way that I’m not going to wear my cut when we’re out of town. Since Butcher’s club is a charter of Slim’s, then he should be cool with me wearing it. We’re friends here and there’s no reason why we can’t be there too. That’s the reasoning I’m going with and I hope Slim paves the way for me.
Once I’m done, I walk back into Shelby’s room and see Riley sitting in the middle of the floor, folding her little clothes, and crying. My heart breaks for her in this moment because there’s nothing I can do to take the pain away that she’s feeling. I’m sure it’s so overwhelming that she can’t even enjoy the fact that her daughter is about to come home to her. Couple that with her fears that she’s going to be a bad mom and not know what to do, she has to be freaking out right now.
“What do I do if this woman doesn’t want to give my baby to me?” she asks, finally looking up and seeing me standing in the doorway.
“We’re not goin’ to worry about that because she isn’t goin’ to have any choice in the matter once the DNA test proves that she is your child. Get that shit out of your head right now beautiful,” I tell her, needing her to know that we’ll do whatever we can to make sure Shelby comes home with us.
Walking over to her, I kneel down and pull her into my arms. She cries against my chest and I let her. No words are needed in this moment and I know that this is what she needs right now. As soon as we get to Whitney Glen, Riley is going to put her game face on and not let anyone see the pain, fear, and intimidation she feels. I might be able to see it when we’re alone, but even that’s not guaranteed.
“Let’s finish up in here so that we can get some sleep before the ass crack of dawn gets here and brings Slim with it,” I tell her, sitting down next to her so I can help her get the laundry done.
Riley simply nods her head, wipes her tear-stained face, and goes about finishing the task at hand. At the weirdest moments, she surprises the hell out of me with the strength that she has. It’s always just below the surface and Riley doesn’t believe that she possesses the inner strength that she does. One day, with my help, she’ll realize that she’s one badass woman. The kind of woman that will make it by my side and help me rule the club the way it’s meant to be ruled.
We managed to get a few hours of sleep. Riley will be able to get some more if she chooses to ride in the van with the prospect. No matter what, it’s going with us so there’s a way to bring Shelby home. I’m not going to force her to ride where she doesn’t want to though. Crash, Trojan, and Darcy have just gotten here to say their goodbyes to us and there’s already tears flowing from the girls. Because Slim and some members of his club are going, my guys are staying behind. Slim isn’t going to let anything happen to us while we’re gone.
“Do you need me to do anythin’ while you’re gone?” Crash asks me, ready to do anything I need done in the next week or so.
“I don’t think so. Just make sure that businesses are runnin’ good and nothin’ goes to shit,” I tell him, knowing without a doubt that he’ll do everything in his power to make sure everything is good.
“You got it. I’ll call only if I need to,” he tells me, leaning in for a man hug before wandering over to get their girl.
Before I can make my way over to them, I hear the rumble of bikes in the distance and know our time to leave is approaching. Riley stills at the sound and I can visibly see her nerves ratchet up a few more notches. As soon as I make my way over next to Riley, I put my hand on her lower back and begin to rub soothing circles on it. She relaxes into my touch and I’m thankful that I have this connection to her so that she can relax while we watch Slim and some of his guys pull up to the house.
“Are you guys about ready?” Slim asks, once all the bikes are off.
“Yep. Just gave Crash last minute instructions and we just need to load our bags up. Beautiful, do you know where you’re ridin’ yet?” I ask, looking at her to see the emotions passing through her eyes.
“Can I ride with you for a while?” she asks hesitantly.
“Yep. We’ll see how you feel when we stop to take our first break. At any point in time you can let me know you need to get in the SUV and we’ll pull over,” I tell her, looking at Slim so he knows that it’s a possibility.
With a nod of his head, Wood and Boy Scout take our bags and load them in the back of the SUV with the rest of their stuff. Riley gives Darcy one more hug before she turns toward me and waits for me to head on over to my bike. Crash, Trojan, and I give one another a man hug before I slide my coat on, make sure Riley has hers on, and we head over to get on my bike waiting in the driveway.
“Everyone ready?” Slim asks, throwing his leg over his bike.
We all nod ‘yes’ as Riley climbs on behind me and wraps her trembling arms around me. Slim leads the way as I pull up next to him and we make our way to Whitney Glen.
Chapter Five
Riley
I MADE IT A FEW HOURS BEFORE I knew I needed to get off the bike and get in the SUV for the remainder of the trip. My mind is wandering too much, and I didn’t want to make Gage get into an accident. So, I tapped him on the shoulder to let him know that I needed to pull over and get off the bike. He wasn’t happy about it, but when I explained my reasoning, he seemed to calm down a little bit. I know that he wants to be there for me, but I need to figure this shit out on my own before I can think about the possibility of bringing him into my thoughts and feelings.
Boy Scout didn’t try to talk or anything once I got in the SUV with him. He concentrated on driving and left me to my own thoughts. The one and only time he did say something was just to tell me that we were going to be pulling over in a little while to fuel up and get something to eat. I didn’t even realize that I was hungry until he mentioned eating.
My thoughts are filled with how this woman is going to react when we get there to see Shelby. Is she a happy baby? Has she been sick? Am I going to be good enough for her? And the one thought that keeps my fear level high; is this lady going to give her to me without a fight? I have no answers and there’s no way to know for sure until we get there and see what kind of situation we’re walking into.
Gage and I talked a little bit about the last one when we finally climbed into bed. Unfortunately, he has no answers either. The only thing he told me for sure was that this person would have to follow through with the paternity test and when it proves that Shelby is mine, there’s really nothing that she can do to keep my daughter from me. It might work out that we build up to me taking her home with me. Just so that we’re not thrusting her into a brand-new environment with strangers right off the bat, but we’ll get to it after the test is done. I just hope in the mean time I get to spend some time with my daughter and get to know her.
Before I can get too far into my own head, I feel Boy Scout slowing down and getting ready to turn into a little diner attached to a gas station. Maybe this is where they stop when they come down to see their other club. Either way, I’m happy that I can get out, stretch my legs, and get some food in me. Plus, we haven’t had a chance to go to the bathroom since we left. My bladder might be ready to explode right about now.
“You ready to get some grub?” Boy Scout asks, parking the SUV and shutting it down.
“Yeah,” I respond, getting out and making my way over to where Gage is backing his bike in.
&
nbsp; He flashes me a smile and I can’t help the warm, safe feeling that takes over my entire body. It’s like something in me knows that he’s going to be there for me no matter what I need. Whether or not he stays in the picture is something that is yet to be seen, or decided. But, it’s nice to know that the option is there. I just have to figure out if I can let him in enough to keep him in my life in any capacity.
“You okay?” he asks again, wanting to make sure that I’m doing good and not staying in my own head too much.
Nodding my head, I let him take my hand and lace our fingers together. We walk in with the three other men in our group and choose a table at the back. I notice that Slim and one of his men take the seat against the wall, so they can see everything around us. Gage and I sit across from them while Boy Scout and Wood grab the two-person table next to us and drag it so that it’s touching our booth. The entire time, our waitress watches on like this is a normal occurrence when these guys come in here. I guess I would too if this is a regular stop of theirs on the way to Whitney Glen.
“Hi! My name is Kay and I’ll be your waitress today. Can I get you guys something to drink?” she asks, full of enthusiasm and happiness. I wish I felt like that.
We all place our drink and food order without looking at a menu before Kay bounces away to place our order and get our drinks. The guys shoot the shit about nothing in particular while I half listen, and half think about what to expect when we get there. My main concern is that my daughter has been taken care of the right way for the months that we’ve been separated.
“Riley, you with us?” Slim asks, gaining my attention as the waitress sets our food on the table before us.
“Yeah. Sorry, I guess I got lost in my head for a minute there,” I explain, color staining my cheeks at being caught not paying attention.
“It’s fine, honey,” he tells me, understanding lacing his voice. “I’ve talked to Butcher and he’s assured me that as soon as you’re ready, Grace will bring Shelby to the clubhouse to see you. The way he talks, she seems relieved to know that you’re there to prove that she’s your daughter and get her back.”
Shock fills me at the knowledge that there’s going to be no fight with the woman that has her. I can’t believe that this is all happening, and it’s because of Gage. He’s helped me more than anyone else ever has and will never know how much this truly means to me. There’s no possible way that I can show him what it means, even if I let him all the way in.
“She’s not going to fight me at all for her?” I ask, needing to know that this is real and I’m not dreaming. Again.
“Nope. Once the test comes back, your daughter will be all yours,” Slim answers letting the smile overtake his face and soften his hard features.
All of a sudden, I’m famished and practically inhale my food with the knowledge that this is almost over with. I’m not going to let anymore doubt or negative thoughts invade my mind and take over. It’s happened way too much for my liking and before there was nothing that I could do about it. I had no leads on Shelby’s whereabouts or anything to go on to make sure that she was okay. Even if I wasn’t in a position to raise her myself. Now, my dreams seem to be becoming my reality.
Gage notices the change in me and a smile graces his handsome face. He continues eating his food, but places a hand on my thigh under the table and I don’t push him away. I’m not drawing strength from him this time, I’m relishing in his touch because it’s something that he wants to do. There’s no underlying reason for him to touch me. I accept his touch because it’s what I want in this moment. There truly is no other reason for me to welcome his touch.
We’re finally done eating and the guys are settling the bill so that we can get back on the road. I’m not going to be riding with Boy Scout again. Since I’m feeling a new rush of energy and on top of the world, I want to ride with Gage. I want to have my arms wrapped around his hard body and feel the air rushing around me. There’s no need to get lost in my head again, so I know I’ll be okay.
“You gettin’ back in the SUV?” Gage asks, breaking me out of my thoughts.
“Nope. I want to ride with you,” I answer, letting a smile break out on my face. A real smile that seems to take over instead of the fake ones that I’ve been plastering on my face for what feels like forever now.
“You got it,” he responds, wrapping his arm around me and pulling me close to his body as we make our way out to the bikes.
Gage
As soon as Slim let Riley know that there wasn’t going to be a fight with the woman raising Shelby, her entire body relaxed. I know that it’s been a major concern of hers since we found out where her daughter was. Now, it’s one less thing she has to worry about. I couldn’t be happier for her right now.
Hearing her say that she wants to ride on the bike with me brings a smile to my face. I think it’s honestly the first time that she’s chosen to voluntarily get on behind me. She has no clue what it means to me, and I know I won’t be able to find the words to tell her. It’s going to be something that I show her with my actions and the way I treat her in the coming days and months. Hopefully that’s going to be enough.
We’re about an hour out from the clubhouse and Riley hasn’t gotten nervous and anxious since leaving the diner. She truly is staying out of her head and not letting anything else get to her right now. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if she wants to see her daughter as soon as we get there. She’s not going to want to rest, unpack, or get cleaned from the road grime that’s covering her. Shelby is going to come first and that’s how it should be.
The ride is smooth and passes in no time at all. I don’t know if it’s just the fact that I love riding and do it any time I can, or that Riley is at my back with her body pressed to mine and her hands wrapped around me. Before I know it, we’re pulling up to the Whitney Glen Phantom Bastards clubhouse. I tap my girl’s leg so she knows to get off, so I can back my bike in next to Slim’s. Without question, Riley does what I ask with no words exchanged. It’s like we’ve been doing this for years together instead of a few weeks.
Butcher and a few of his guys walk out to meet us and I can barely make out a lady standing in the back of the small group of large men. I want to say that it’s Grace here with Shelby, but I’m not going to say anything and get Riley’s hopes up for no reason. She’s not paying any attention to her right now, so I’ll handle it when she realizes that someone else is out here. For now, I’m going to lead her through the introductions and make sure that these guys know she is definitely off limits. None of them better put their hands on her or try to move in where they don’t belong.
“Butcher, how you doin’?” Slim asks, slapping backs with the President of the club.
“Good. We’ll talk some business later. This must be the lady you called about?” he asks, turning his attention to Riley and me.
“It is. Butcher, meet Gage and Riley. Gage is the President of the Wild Kings in Dander Falls. Riley is with him,” Slim announces, helping me take care of making sure everyone knows Riley is with me and not loose pussy. “Butcher is the President of the Phantom Bastards here.”
“Thank you so much for the help, Butcher,” I tell him, extending my hand and letting him know that it means a lot to me that he was able to find Shelby.
“Anytime. A friend of Slim’s is always a friend of mine. You’re welcome here anytime,” he responds, turning to Riley. “I have someone here that you want to meet. Are you ready?”
Riley pauses for a second and I can see her composing herself and bracing for the moment she’s been waiting ten long months for. The moment that she gets to see her daughter for the first time and actually hold her in her arms. This is what’s going to make this trip worth every hard second she’s faced alone. Nodding her head, Butcher turns around and the guys before him part like the red sea to show an older woman holding a child.
I look at my girl and see that she’s looking at me before she takes a single step forward. So, I do the only thing
I can and lace our fingers together so that we can take this step together. She’s not alone in this and I will be by her side through it all. For all the dirty diapers, sickness, teething, potty training, falling asleep on our chests, smiling, playing, everything from the good to the not so good. I want to be there for them and I will without fail. We take the first step toward our future and I can’t wait to see where it takes us.
We slowly make our way to Grace and watch as she looks between Shelby and Riley. I can see the second it registers to her that this is indeed mother and daughter. Grace lifts Shelby up higher and turns her around so that we can see the precious little girl sitting in her arms. Riley has tears streaming down her face already and I can see her reaching her hands out to touch her daughter, once she releases my hand, before pulling them back to her side. She’s scared that this woman isn’t going to let her touch her own daughter and it’s slowly killing off another piece of her heart. You can see it written all over her face.
“I don’t know exactly what happened to you and your daughter,” Grace begins, still looking between Riley and Shelby. “What I do know is that this little girl should’ve never been taken from you. I’m not going to stand in the way of you having your daughter. So, you can take her now as long as you stay here until all the testing and shit is done.”
Our mouths drop open at the knowledge that we’ll get to keep Shelby with us. “Are you sure? I just wanted to see her and spend a minute or two with her before you left. You are giving me a gift that I can’t thank you enough for,” Riley tells her, once again stretching her hands out to see if her daughter will accept going into her waiting arms.
Shelby doesn’t hesitate to go into her mother’s outstretched arms. It’s like she knows that Riley is her mom and she’s supposed to be with her. With us. The tears are rolling down my girl’s face and I wish I could stop them as Shelby cuddles into her mom. She buries her head in Riley’s shoulder and sticks her thumb in her mouth while looking at Grace.