by A. M. Kusi
“Jax!”
“I need to tell you all something. I don’t mean to ruin your night, River and Ella, but I couldn’t wait another second.”
“What is it, bro?” River asked.
Her family and Ella’s friends all dispersed around the white kitchen. Was he really going to do this in front of everyone? What about his job?
“Jax, maybe we should talk privately first,” Harper said.
“No, enough of the secrets,” he said.
“What are you talking about?” asked David.
Jax stepped up to Harper’s side and looked River and then David in the eyes. “I am in love with your daughter.”
“What?” River asked in disbelief. A look of comprehension appeared on his face. “How long has this been going on?”
“We dated for a couple months, and I take full responsibility for not telling you both. It was because of me that we kept it a secret. My reasons are not as valid as I thought, and I am sorry I betrayed your trust,” Jax said.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” River asked, his glance moving between Jax and her.
Jax took a deep breath before he answered. “I was scared to lose our friendship. Now, I see why I have ruined it in more ways than one.”
“Is this your conflict of interest? Is this why you turned down the job offer?” David asked, stone-faced.
“Yes,” Jax answered.
“What does he mean?” she asked, turning to Jax. “You gave up the position? Why? Isn’t that what you wanted? Isn’t that the reason you didn’t have room for me in your life?”
His gaze locked onto her. “I thought so. Then I realized that you are more important than my career, and my life means nothing without you in it. I have a conflict of interest; I am in love with my best friend’s sister and my boss’s daughter. But I will give up anything to have you back in my life again. I screwed up. I didn’t treat you like the goddess you are, and I understand if you never want to see me again. I had to tell you. I need you more than oxygen. More than the dawn needs the sun. More than I ever thought humanly possible. You’re a piece of my soul, and without you I’m only half the man I should be.”
Jax took her hand and looked into Harper’s eyes as he continued, “I love you with every broken, stubborn, blind piece of me. I’ve known for a long time, but I wouldn’t admit it to myself. I was scared about how much power you would have to hurt me. It isn’t easy for me to open up and talk about my feelings. I’m more like my father than I care to admit sometimes. I was the one being immature, hiding what I felt for you and our relationship from our families. I don’t care if you can’t have children, or if being with you means dealing with your condition each day of our lives. I will love you forever, and be by your side through everything.”
Tears welled in her eyes. She blinked sending them falling down her cheeks in streams. She wanted to say the words, but they were stuck in her throat.
“What condition?” asked River.
“What does he mean, Harper?” David questioned as he turned to his wife.
Sandra pressed her lips together before confirming, “Jax is the one?”
“What condition do I have exactly?” Harper asked Jax, wondering how he could have found out.
“Cancer. Like your mom had.”
Shocked gasps echoed from the small audience gathered around them.
“What?” David staggered back a step as Sandra’s arms wrapped around him comfortingly.
River pinched the bridge of his nose, before regaining control of himself. His eyes glistened with unshed tears as he asked, “Did they catch it in time?”
Harper’s voice was momentarily frozen in shock herself. “I—I’m not sick. Well, I mean, I have been, but it’s not what you think.” She tried to clarify. Announcing this to everyone, all at once, had never been her plan.
“Oh, my God!” David said, shaking his head, not seeming to hear her.
“What she has will be cured in about five months,” Sandra said.
“Is it curable?” River asked.
“I’m not dying! I’m pregnant,” Harper yelled.
Seeing the astonished faces around her, she turned back to Jax whose eyes widened as his mouth dropped open in shock.
Chapter 32
“I’m going to be a dad?” Jax asked. A violent twist of relief, terror, and excitement ripped through his body.
“You got my sister pregnant?” River asked in disbelief.
“Yes,” Harper said, facing Jax. “I was going to tell you, but I just needed time to figure some things out for myself. You didn’t want distractions, and a baby would be a big one.”
“Life-changing,” Sandra added.
David looked at his wife. “You knew?”
Sandra shook her head. “She told me in the hospital, but not who the father was.”
Jax found his voice. “I’m so sorry, Harper, that I left you to deal with all of this on your own. I have been selfish and dishonest and I won’t blame you if you never want to see me again. But I do love you, and I’d be ever grateful for the chance to make it right.”
“What if I can’t forgive you?” she asked, looking up to meet his gaze.
His whole body was blazing with the familiar heat from whenever she was near. The idea of not being able to be with her seized his chest with panic.
“Then I will learn how to co-parent with the woman I love, who I can’t have.”
Tears streamed down Harper’s face as she said, “I love you too, Jax. It’s always been you.” Harper tipped up on her toes to reach him for a kiss. His hot mouth met hers with relief. A kiss of new beginnings, and promises of a future. Vows made from flames. The well of desire overflowing, drowning out everything else but the need to love her fiercely. He forgot for a moment that they were not alone in the crowded kitchen before someone cleared their throat.
Harper stepped back and blushed. “I’m sorry we kept this from you,” she said, facing her family.
“It wouldn’t have been a problem if you’d come to me and told me,” River said, looking at Jax.
“It wouldn’t?” He asked, surprised.
“No. There isn’t anyone I would have trusted more with my little sister. You didn’t have to lie and sneak around.”
“I know I broke your trust. I will do everything in my power to earn it back. The same goes for you, Mr. Parker. I will clean out my desk Monday, but I hope you eventually find it in your heart to give me the opportunity to earn your respect again, sir.”
David looked thoughtfully at Jax and Harper. “You gave up the promotion of a lifetime because you loved my only daughter and chose her. That seems pretty honorable to me, son.”
“Sir?” Jax asked.
“My offer still stands, on the condition that you treat my daughter the way she deserves: with respect. And if you’re forthright with us in the future. That is, if you still want the position?”
Jax was in awe. “Yes.”
Sandra smiled. “We’re going to be grandparents!”
Ella spoke. “Now we have two things to celebrate tonight. How about some mead, and non-alcoholic cider for the new mama?”
Harper smiled, looking around at her family and new friends. Relieved that everything was now out in the open. Harper and he still had a lot to work on, but right now, he had everything he’d ever wanted.
Jax wrapped his arm around her and held her close to his body while the rest of the family and guests laughed and chatted.
“How did you two get together in the first place? Was it work?” River asked.
Harper blushed.
Jax cleared his throat, remembering the hot night he had taken the mysterious sexy masked woman to his penthouse suite. “The masquerade fundraiser.”
River nodded. “You better take care of my sister.”
Jax nodded. �
�I will.”
River looked over to Harper, giving her an equally hard stare. “And you better take care of my brother.”
Harper smiled and glanced to Jax as he made no attempt to hide his surprise. “I will.”
***
A little while later, Harper left the festivities and headed to her room with Jax. She pulled him against her as soon as the door was closed. She couldn’t stand one more minute of being separate from him. She missed the feel of his body.
He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with her rose perfume. “I missed you. I missed your smell, your laugh, and everything about you.”
“I missed you too,” she said, looking up to see his eyes grow darker.
“When you had your doctor’s appointment, the one I missed, that’s when you found out?” he asked.
“Yes. They had me pee in the cup to test before giving me a new birth-control prescription. Apparently there was an oversight and the nurse who was handling that part of my visit started throwing up and was sent home sick. They realized I had never been informed and called me to come in.”
“That’s why you were so tired all the time. Didn’t you drink wine at Thanksgiving?”
“It was grape juice.”
“You’ve lost weight. Don’t you usually gain weight when you’re pregnant?”
“I have had a rough time with nausea. I’ve needed a few trips to the hospital for fluids because of dehydration. When I managed to eat something, I usually threw it back up. Now that I am in my second trimester, things seem to be getting better. The dizziness was because of that.”
“Oh, I just…I really thought you had cancer. I read up on it and you had some of the symptoms.”
“Nope. Just a baby. Your baby,” she assured him.
“My baby,” Jax repeated quietly. She searched his face for any sign of how he was feeling about the news.
“I know you are not ready for a child. It was a huge surprise to me. I forgot that birth control is ineffective when you take antibiotics. I got an ear infection that week in August. Are you mad?” she asked, unsure.
He picked her up in his arms and carried her over to the large bed. “No. If I remember correctly, I was there too. I know it’s been a while since I’ve taken sex-ed in school, but I’m pretty sure it takes two to make a baby.”
Harper smiled, relieved as he laid her on the bed and crawled next to her.
“What about your parents?” she asked, a tinge of apprehension still clinging to her belly.
“My dad has fallen in love with your pasta, and by default, you.”
Harper laughed. Joy and lightness spreading through her.
“Having his heart attack enabled us to have some deeper conversations. I got to understand their reluctance a little better. They just need to get to know you. And they are willing to do that now.”
“I’m glad. Jax?” she asked.
“Yes?”
“I need you to know that I won’t let you treat me like you did. You can’t talk to me like that again, and blame me when you get angry. You can’t avoid me with work. You have to talk to me, communicate to me what you need, what you’re worried about, if this is going to work. I want to know all parts of you.”
“I promise to do my best.”
“And I promise not to be a distraction.” She looked down.
He tenderly lifted her chin back to face him. “I made a mistake when I said that to you. If anything, you have made me become a better man. You bring out the best in me and help me grow. The only way you distract me is because of how beautiful you are. Sometimes I forget to breathe. I look at you and time stills. My heart races.” Jax placed her hand over his chest where she could feel the rapid beat. “My body is in a constant state of arousal around you,” he said.
Harper licked her lips. “Mine too.”
He continued, “But, it’s more than just the physical, it’s like you ignite my soul and challenge my mind. You’ve seen the worst of me and yet you still love me. I want to be with you until we are old and grey. I meant it when I said I would love you forever.”
“Just because we have a baby together doesn’t mean I will marry you.” She smirked.
“I don’t want to marry you because we have a child. I want to join my life with yours because I love you like I will never love another. I will be the best husband humanly possible, if you let me. I need a partner in my life who pushes me to grow, and who doesn’t put up with my crap. A woman who loves to make her grandmother’s sauce with a twist. A woman who brings out the greatest version of me. A woman who is spontaneous and helps balance me out. A teammate. A partner.”
“She sounds like one hell of a woman.” Harper smiled.
“She’s not a woman; she’s a goddess.” Jax gazed at her expectantly. “Will you marry me, Harper, and make me the proudest man in the world?”
Her eyes grew large with surprise before she smiled. “Si Amore mio,” Harper said and brought her lips to his.
Jax broke the kiss momentarily to ask, “Does that mean yes?”
“Yes, my love.”
***
Jax smiled and brushed his hands over the silky smooth skin before he held her face. He took in her beauty before he brought his mouth down gently on hers. His hands moved slow, taking off her clothes piece by piece. His mouth trailed kisses over her body until she was completely bare in front of him.
He sat and pulled off his clothes, leaving them in a pile on the floor. In reverence, he kneeled over her, taking in each delectable inch of her body. He found the small bump that was developing in her lower stomach, and he pressed his warm hand there. This woman was truly a goddess—a creator of life. He bent low to kiss her stomach tenderly.
“Jax,” she said his name like a plea.
“Let me show you just how much I love you, baby.” He moved his head between her thighs, hooking her legs over his shoulders. He spread her open, dropping his head to worship at the temple where all of life began. She writhed as he lapped, and laved. Using one hand to grip her hips, holding her down, while his other dipped, pleasuring her from the inside out. He took his time slowly bringing her first orgasm with his mouth. She trembled, as a warm rush of fresh lust mixed with pure adoration for this woman filled him with warmth, shedding light on all the parts that he had kept hidden in darkness for so long; afraid they were unlovable. Connecting fully with her for the first time in true intimacy. He moved his head, scratching his beard against her thigh. She shivered and grasped his head.
Through her pants, she begged, “Please, Jax. I need you.”
He smiled and moved his hard body to rest over her sensitive soft flesh. His hands ran over her shoulders and neck, behind her back and down to her waist as he joined his body to hers in one thrust. She sucked in a breath of air and Jax roared as she took all of him: mind, body, and soul. It had been so long since they were together, but it had never been this intense.
“You feel so good,” he said. “You’re so sexy. I love you, goddess.”
“I love you too. Don’t stop. I need you. Please don’t stop,” she begged.
His hands ran up to her shoulders, deepening their connection. His naked chest against hers. Her wild pulse matching his beat for beat; as one. Flames licked his body as he dove deeper into the passionate chaos that swirled around them. A hurricane of love and lust. Devotion and revelation. Demanding and healing. Devastating and restoring. Each breath, a prayer for eternity. Harper moaned and squeezed her legs around him, and they rocked back and forth.
At first, Jax’s movements were so slow and torturous. His gaze never left hers as they made love. Soft and languid, until Harper dug her nails into the flesh of his back, needing more. Awareness spun through him like an exotic dance. He could tell she was close.
“I love you,” Jax said, over and over with each thrust, driving them both over the edge i
nto delirium-inducing ecstasy. His body tensed and they came together. Trembles rocked Harper’s body with aftershocks and he finally relaxed, looking at the blissful smile on her face.
“I love you too,” she said.
***
Jax pulled out and laid next to her, breathing heavily. She rested her head on his chest, feeling the warmth of his body and listening to the drumbeat of his heart. She had everything she wanted: the man she loved with all her heart and her child growing safely in her womb. She was going to be a mom, and soon, a wife.
“Will you always look at me that way?” she asked.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, if we make it to be eighty, do you think you will still have the same attraction and love for me as you do now?”
“The same love? No.”
“Oh,” Harper said, hurt by his blunt answer.
Jax pulled her chin to look at him. “I think the longer we are together, the more deeply we will learn to love each other. In this very moment, I can’t imagine what that looks like, because I can’t picture loving you any more than I do now. I know from watching my parents’ that love changes and grows as long as two people stick together and put each other first.”
She smiled, her heart about to burst.
“As for attraction, honey, I’ll want you until the day I die. I’m sure I’ll have to get a hip replacement at some point, but that’s something to look forward to. If I have bionic hips, it will be like you’re making love with Superman.” He laughed and she joined him.
“I can’t wait for that,” he said.
“For a hip replacement?”
“No. For forever with you.” Jax kissed her forehead and then each of her cheeks, tracing the line between her neck and shoulder, before landing his last kiss on her mouth.
Epilogue
Nine months later
Jax packed the last few bags into the SUV. He’d bought it for Harper before their daughter, Mila, was born in May. She came a few days early and arrived just after midnight on Mother’s Day.