Life Changer

by Zack Parker

  I know when most of us think of different cultures, we think very broadly, very "big picture." We think of people from places like America, India, Italy, China, Brazil, or perhaps Britain or Ireland. When we think of the individuals that make up these large groups certain qualities of the people from that area pop up in our minds. Perhaps these qualities are of their mild physical differences or perhaps of the unique types of cuisine they enjoy. While these considerations can seem like powerful shaping tools for individual development, let’s become a little bit more specific on what culture can mean and how it can affect our understanding of moderation. Let's talk about the culture of our families that we find in our homes. The lineage of our ancestors can profoundly influence these cultures, but two families of Brazilian descent can have very different cultural practices within them. These differences in cultural practices within each family can significantly affect the perceived minimums and maximums involved with each member’s practice of personal moderation. Therefore, even though these individuals may be actively pursuing a more positive lifestyle, these subtle changes in household culture can have substantial effects on the health and well-being of the members within them. Their pursuit of health and balance, however steadfast, can be tainted by cultural biases. So, just like the rest of the subjects we have covered in this book, it all comes down to perspective.

  As a species, we will probably continue to develop and maintain many different cultures, each with its own set of values and standards which will continue to evolve over time. How they develop and what the future may hold for our upcoming generations may very well be up to us. We must learn to step outside of our local cultures and see things from a more scientific and reality-based perspective. We live in the age of information, so developing a somewhat informed perspective on what a proper human diet should be like is not that hard to attain. If these elevations in perspective are not hard to achieve then why do we still see so much confusion? I mean, if your culture tells you a particular type of diet is normal and healthy, but everyone around you is suffering from cardiac diseases, Type Two Diabetes, Neuropathy, Osteoarthritis, and Obesity then perhaps it is time to rethink your food choices. If you happen to find yourself in a contradictory situation like this, then you should not only consider how much you participate in that culture, but you should also focus heavily on exactly how to practice moderation while living within it. It means it's time to get the education. If we could establish the real peaceful mediums and we were all able to accept and adhered to them, then almost all of humanity would flourish and prosper.

  In our pursuit of a moderated lifestyle, there is one area of moderation that must not be forgotten, and that is moderation itself. Remember this "Everything must be practiced in moderation, including moderation!" One of the great joys in life is indulgence! We must become educated to the point of confidence and from our confidently educated perspective allow ourselves the occasional indulgence. It's okay to occasionally eat more than what you normally would. It's okay to celebrate a special occasion. Just make sure it’s actually a special occasion and not just a Friday night! It's okay to sleep in when you know you need it. Exercising more than usual from time to time is okay! It's okay to indulge in fasting and eat less for a while! Spending more time than usual with friends is okay. Its okay to spend more time alone. Just don't get lost in indulgence. The one thing you must never allow for indulgence in is indulgence itself.

  From now on what I want you to try to start doing is to view what you see as a moderated lifestyle objectively. Be honest with yourself, and compare that moderation to researched and studied facts, because let's be honest, without research we only have opinion. Everyone has an opinion, and most of them are all different! Your idea of moderated alcohol consumption may far exceed someone else's maximum and therefore fully eclipse what they see as moderate alcohol consumption. Who is right? Without research, you will probably never know. If you never know, then you could be doing yourself real serious harm in the long run of your life. You must learn to think about the big picture. They say that hindsight is 20/20. Trust me, when your health starts failing; knowing what you should have done is not a hindsight you want to have.

  I know that this chapter sounds like so much self-discipline, so much conscious effort, and so much work, and in truth, it kind of is. However, in the midst of all this change, something beautiful will begin to happen. You will be creating your own culture. You will be creating a culture of educated moderation, and with continued practice, it will eventually require minimal effort on your part. Your life will require less effort because at some point it will no longer be what you're trying to do; it will merely become what you do. When this change in lifestyle transforms from effort to instinct, you will inevitably reap the benefits of a well-balanced lifestyle! Hopefully, what will happen next is that someone else will be affected by their observation of your positive choices. When this happens, your actions will not only have created positive change in your life, but you will have started to change the world. I know it may seem like a far cry to say that if you practice moderation you will change the world, but if you want to change your culture and the world, then it ultimately has to start with you and no one else. Just practice moderation in your moderation, and always practice moderation.

  Chapter12

  Indulgence

  I touched briefly on the topic of Indulgence in the previous chapter entitled “Moderation.” I brought it up briefly at the end of the chapter because these two subjects tie in closely with one another although they may seem like polar opposites. Having a healthy understanding of indulgence is just as important as proper practice of moderation, and both are critical aspects of what I believe to be a balanced outlook on the human experience. When considering our understanding of moderation and indulgence, we must learn the difference between what we just want and what we actually need. This conversation on indulgence is one that needs to be had because life is about more than need. If all we required for a full life were the things that our bodies need for survival, then we would not be human. Other things in nature survive purely by satisfying need, but we as humans are a little more complex. We have wants. We make plans around our wants. We strategize, develop skills, and exhaust vast amounts of our resources in the name of want. The indulgence in what we desire brings great joy to our lives as humans. However, as we continue to move forward our overzealous pursuit of want is becoming one of the most significant threats to our survival, both as individuals and as a species on this planet. The reason I’m writing this chapter is to explain the importance of having conscious control while still practicing moderated indulgence.

  As a species, our need for indulgence comes from many different places. Some of our motivation comes from deep within our psyche, and other motives come from far in the past. There is psychological conditioning through modern day marketing and the allure of what we have been conditioned to perceive as success. Culture weighs in heavily and there is also what we privately desire as individuals. All of these forces are bombarding us from all angles on a daily basis, and all are promoting an ever-growing lust for indulgence. Some may have substantial influence over you and some may not, but one thing is for sure, as a species, we love to indulge.

  There’s something very satisfying about having more than we need. Perhaps our love of indulgence can be somewhat explained by the confidence it provides. There is a certain level of security and mental relaxation found in the capability one must first obtain to even have the ability to indulge. There is a sort of complete lack of stress involved with knowing there is more than enough. Being able to indulge allows us to temporarily erase the worry that the supply will not last until we reach satisfaction. I believe we also have our ancestors to thank. For millennia they lived in such times of feast or famine that whenever there were extra resources, they developed a strong need to consume or to hoard them to make the most use out of what was available. In those times, indulgence was an essential part of the preparation for the
future. This was true for food as well as material items. There was nothing wrong with indulgence during these periods. These are the strategies that allowed for our ancestor's survival and therefore are responsible for our existence. Without indulgence, at the proper time, many of us would not be here. It was the “getting while the getting was good” philosophy which allowed for our ancestors to create surpluses. These surpluses came in many forms, but they were primarily found as either body fat or the accumulation of material and farmed goods. This indulgence is what allowed for the future survival of our species. However, while the indulgences we are talking about can be looked upon in a very favorable light, we must be willing to see our current world for what it is. The fortunate fact for many of us here in modern times is that indulgence is more of a luxury than a necessity. Unfortunately for many, luxury has been mistaken for a need and this confused mindset has led to many of the problems our society now faces.

  I know one of the great joys of my life is being able to sit down to a big meal and eat until I am content. Another joy in my life comes from conscious and active deprivation. There is something deeply satisfying about it. I know what I want is there for the taking, but I can use my informed mind and realize that I don't need it. I am able to rise above my primal brain; the brain that tells me that more is better, and decide to have less. It is the reclaiming of my free will. This deprivation not only benefits my body, but my mind and financial wellbeing are allowed to prosper as well. Deciding to have less for the increased health of my mind, body and bank account gives me a great sense of peace. I know that by making conscious decisions to not blindly follow my instincts that I’m increasing the longevity of my body and also of the money I work so hard to acquire. This control of indulgence is also beneficial in numerous other ways. It makes the more seldom periods of indulgence that I allow for myself to become that much more enjoyable. The real bliss found in anticipated indulgences completely eclipses any momentary cessation that can be had with constant overindulgence. I see so many people that feel they need to have enormous quantities of food at every meal or own everything that is popular to have. Their health suffers, and they struggle to stay afloat financially, all because of their lack of understanding in regards to indulgence.

  Indulgence can be a great joy! However, if pleasure becomes commonplace because of consistent overindulgence, then a hole is created where the joy of indulgence used to be. The subconscious brain struggles to discover if there is anything to take its place? Usually the answer to this question, for most it seems, is even further indulgence. It is not natural to live in a state of constant indulgence. These times of plenty are something to be looked forward to and enjoyed in a state of gratitude. We should not blindly feel entitled to this privilege or overindulge just because we have the ability. Quite contrary to the previous chapter on moderation, we must make sure we do not practice indulgence in our indulgence. Do you remember what we talked about in regards to practicing moderation in our moderation? These two are entirely different in practice. So what you need to understand is that where we should practice moderation in our moderation, we should never practice indulgence in our indulgences. Instead, we should indulge in moderation and practice moderation and our indulgence.

  One of the primary motivating factors for this chapter comes from people I have known over the years that for some reason over deprive themselves. They become so self-conscious over certain social stereotypes that they almost eliminate indulgences from their life entirely. Even though their intentions may come from a sincere desire for personal growth, they stray and become lost from the proper path. This confusion is something you should be very careful to avoid. You must find balance. Without the fundamental human joy that moderated indulgence provides our motivations can become twisted, and our life can seem pointless. If we begin to use deprivation as our only avenue to peace, then we eventually find we have eliminated so much that life has once again become defined by want. If this becomes the case then what was all of the sacrifice for anyway? If we sacrifice for health, then the obvious benefit is health. If we sacrificed for wealth, then the desired benefit is wealth. However, if we over deprive and somehow become defined by our deprivation then where is the advantage. If it takes away more joy than it creates, then it will eventually lead to suffering. We must be able to step back, assume a healthier perspective, and realize we have become temporarily lost on our journey. If this has already happened to you or if you currently find yourself headed to a place such as this then don’t worry, you have in your hands the roadmap back to where you wish to be. Remember, nowhere we have ever been has final decision-making power over where we are headed or where we will end up. We can always change course and pursue the place we actually want to be. Always!

  Try to remember something. I know when I talk about these ideas I focus a lot on diet, exercise, or perhaps money. However, I want you to remember that these philosophies are to be applied across the board. Some people overindulge in religious doctrines while others deprive themselves of spiritually enlightening practices. Some overstock material goods while others over limit themselves. Some overindulge in sports while others never enjoy a game. Some people try to buy the love of others with gifts and then there are those who never know the joy of giving. As I have said before, the trick is to find the balance. It’s all about perspective. It doesn’t matter what you’re talking about. Enjoy your indulgences, but make sure they are just that: indulgences. Don’t allow yourself to steal what makes these indulgences so special by embracing the mindset that they should be happening for you on a daily basis or that you need more than you do. Don’t allow for your want to be mistaken for need. Become intimately acquainted with both want and need so you are clear when making decisions about what to incorporate into your days. This will bring about a higher degree of personal control in your life and allow for an improved sense of confidence in yourself. If there is anything I would recommend that you overindulge in, it would be love. Love yourself. Love your family. Show love and give love to those around you. If you do, I can promise you that this is an indulgence you will never regret.

  Chapter 13

  “Body”

  I have and will continue to relate many chapters in this series of books back to your possible religious or spiritual understandings. I hope nothing I have to say is taken as offensive. I use this background because understanding and knowledge in these areas are so prevalent amongst us humans. It’s common regardless of color, creed, sex, or nationality. Even if you don't currently have or practice religion, you are aware of at least one and probably know a decent about how it is supposed to work. With this understanding, I want to point out an almost universally accepted primase which nearly all organized religions and spiritual practices seem to share and agree upon; there is a separation of spirit, or mind, and the body. Everyone pretty much seems to recognize that the body is a vessel and that we can easily be separated from it, either temporarily or permanently. What I want to point out in this chapter is if we can be separated from it, then even when we are within it, we are at least, in some way, already separate from it. I want to elaborate on just exactly how this relationship between us and our body truly works. Hopefully, as I share my thoughts with you, I will allow you to establish the more dominant role in this relationship that you were always meant to have.

  Do you remember when you were learning to brush your teeth? I’m sure that like me, many of you struggled with the concept, then the technique, and finally the daily repetition. I remember fighting this responsibility at first. Most of us do, but this does not last forever. Slowly, as we accepted the concept, we started to develop personal techniques, skill, and eventually our very own quality standards. I remember thinking " back teeth, front teeth" then as I grew it became "top front teeth, top back teeth, bottom front teeth, bottom back teeth." As I developed my skill and my standards grew I began to incorporate the front, back, and articular surfaces of my teeth as well! Standing in front of a mirror as a young boy
, I remember going over my checklist in my head. A small level of pride began to develop for doing the job well. However, at some point in time as my skill became more and more closely matched with my expectations the memories of those thoughts seem to disappear. Had I stopped brushing my teeth? Did my dental hygiene fall apart and did the health of my teeth slowly slip into decay? No, I didn't stop brushing my teeth, and no, they did not rot away. I have relatively healthy teeth and gums. Exciting stuff, right? The reasoning behind all of this is to point out a simple observation I made one day as I proceeded through my morning routine. I saw myself in the mirror, brushing my teeth. I cleaned vigorously and with considerable attention to detail, but there was no checklist! No standards! I was thinking about everything in the world other than brushing my teeth, but somehow the job was being performed. It was almost like someone else was in charge. I realized my body was executing the task. My body had learned through years of conscious repetition and now, once commanded, was completing the job on its own.