The Siders Box Set

by Leah Clifford

  The tics, needing to find order, would only worsen. Usually she fought the urge; today though, she gave in to the indulgence. A few weeks ago, Eden and Gabriel had shown up on her doorstep. Lucifer had stolen Az away, was trying to sway him to Fall. They’d made plans for a rescue—she, Gabe and Eden--but then Eden had gone early and alone.

  When Eden had bolted before dawn, Gabe had been sleeping but Kristen had caught her in the act, could have stopped her. Instead she’d dosed her up with Touch, given her all the strength she’d had and a head start.

  And you said nothing. You know what Luke is capable of and you sent that poor girl to face him alone. Because of you, Gabriel could have lost her and Az to the Fallen. No wonder he won’t speak to you, the voice berated.

  When Gabe awoke, she’d expected anger, yelling, but the wrath in him, the fury blazing red in his eyes, had tempered her terrified apology into silence.

  She lifted her eyes to the mirror and swore she caught a flash of exposed bone on her jaw, as if her glamour shifted out of place. Despite being undead, she looked normal enough as long as the glamour stayed; only the touch of another Sider could drop it. Being as she was alone in her room, that left two possibilities. Kristen studied herself. Had the vision been the first flicker of a hallucination or merely a trick of the light?

  “It was the light,” she reassured herself. “Gabriel will come back.”

  And if he doesn’t?

  “He only needs time.”

  You betrayed him. Betrayed the trust of the only person you dared call a friend. You took him for granted and now he’s gone. Guilt dropped her eyes.

  The last bottle of nail polish lay on its side. She spun it in a lazy circle, the maroon color a shade too dark to be the C minor she needed to finish the song. Kristen hummed the tune softly.

  It was only then that she recognized the melody, the musician who’d written it.

  “Luke,” she whispered.

  He’d help you. Go to him.

  “Never,” she spat at the mirror. “Luke is not an option.”

  Yet. The lips of her reflection twisted into a cruel smile.

  “No!” Kristen thrust her hands out, the bottles slamming against the mirror and tumbling to the floor as she dropped her head onto her arms. “Damn it, Gabriel, where are you?”

  She concentrated on the dull roar of her blood pounding through her eardrums, using the steady arterial rhythms to calm herself. She waited for voices caught in the white noise, but heard only her heartbeat.

  Behind her, a throat cleared. She didn’t need to glance up to know Sebastian stood at the threshold. “Everything—”

  “Everything is fine,” she insisted, cutting him off as she lifted her head with a sharp sniff.

  Sebastian regarded her, his brown eyes uncertain. Worry creased his forehead. He’d been her Second, at her side before her crew of Siders had grown to the twenty or so the house now held. Sebastian, who she knew would defend her to the death, who’d been her consort when she’d needed comfort. Her most trusted ally aside from Gabriel. Even he knew nothing of her illness. The thing Gabe had tried so hard to fix, but only managed to dull wasn’t something she would ever speak of aloud to him, no matter what he suspected.

  She couldn’t bear the thought of him seeing her as weak.

  “Everything is fine.”

  Sebastian stood, bulky arms crossed, waiting, as if she’d suddenly break and confide in him. “What happened?” he asked, gesturing to the mess. He moved closer, working a fingernail into a chip missing from the corner of the mirror.

  “I bumped my knee and nearly tipped the damned thing over.” The words came in a breathy rush. “It’s fine. I’ll clean it later.” She tried to work up a smile but couldn’t.

  “You seem rattled,” he said. From the look on Sebastian’s face he knew the thin line he tread. He’d mastered hovering between asking too much or too little, smart enough not to force explanations for her behavior. “Should I be concerned?”

  “Currently? No.” She stood and pushed past him, out of the room, and heading down the hall.

  Sebastian followed wordlessly until she passed by the staircase and into the left wing. “Maybe it’d be better if you came straight downstairs today?”

  Kristen didn’t slow her steps and Sebastian hesitated. The left wing frightened him. Frightened everyone but her, because of what it held behind its locked doors. From behind her she heard Sebastian’s hard sigh, his footsteps retreating down the staircase.

  Everyone knew the rumor. The punishment for stepping out of line. Standing against Kristin in any way meant becoming a Screamer.

  A fine line separated ‘charismatic leader’ from ‘violent psychopath’. Kristen kept herself somewhere in the gray area between the two—cruel when necessary, fair to the Siders under her roof who behaved. If they kept to the rules, a docile little flock, she gave them food and shelter, even the illusion of safety. And if not…

  Every Sider in her home, as well as most in the other boroughs, gossiped about how she kept misbehavers locked in darkened rooms, forced them to build Touch until they lost their minds, begged to pass to her. She let them sometimes, loading up on Touch until her tolerance built. Until she could hold more than the other Siders. In the past, when Gabe had been occupied and unavailable, she’d dumped the excess Touch to clear her mind. Losing a massive amount at once helped her hang onto her sanity for a few more days, a strategy she intended to employ now.

  Kristen made her way down the hall. The first rooms were occupied by normal Siders, the doors closed. They no doubt heard her. Lately, they hid more and more.

  Kristen had done what she could to separate the territories, drum up hostilities that had no basis in reality. She’d banded her Siders together—threats kept them vigilant and loyal. They thought the other leaders, Madeline in Queens, or even Eden in Manhattan, were plotting against them. Only the territory leaders knew the true danger was from the angels.

  When she reached the last room, Kristen slipped the key from the pocket of her dress. She unlocked and opened the door.

  On the bed sat a boy, his eyes glazed. She gave him a once-over. Frailty made him appear childish.

  Her insides hummed, eager for the release of the Touch built up inside her. Kristen sat beside him and leaned forward. The Screamer didn’t move.

  Her lips tingled when they made contact with his. She felt Touch release from deep inside her, dragged up and out as if on a string. A sigh slipped out before she cut it off and rocked back, her lips still parted.

  A split second of confusion drifted across the boy’s face before the look sharpened to terror.

  “No!” He shot off the bed, scrambling for the door, but Kristen snatched at his ankle, tumbling him to the floor. He wrapped his arm across his stomach, curling into a ball.

  She stumbled past him, trembling.

  “I have to get rid of it! You have to let me out of here!”

  Kristen closed the door without answering him, locked it. His high-pitched wail made her wince. She steadied herself with a hand on the wall.

  She’d given every bit of her Touch to the boy, and her head felt clearer. The time he’d bought her wouldn’t be long. Soon there’d be nothing to stave off the madness.

  The Screamers weren’t a rumor, but no one knew the truth. They were ballast.

  For a sinking ship, she thought miserably.

  Chapter 3

  The rich coffee smell wasn’t enough to keep Jarrod alert. He tried to follow Zach’s orders but already a customer had screamed at him when he used nonfat milk instead of regular. Another had walked out when he’d taken too long. Zach swerved around him, splashing together concoctions for the Milton’s regulars before they even spit out their orders.

  Jarrod rolled his shoulders. Gotta do better, he thought. He’d only started the job a few days ago. It’d taken him almost three weeks to heal from his fall. Rooftop swan dives were officially off his Things To Do list.

  “Eden coming
by today?” Zach asked, twisting to fill another paper cup.

  “Not sure. Maybe. Tomorrow probably.”

  Zach shifted in front of Jarrod and paused long enough to catch his attention. “She okay?”

  Zach hadn’t been told why Adam suddenly wasn’t with their crew anymore. The one time it had been brought up, Jarrod’s discomfort seemed to leave Zach assuming there’d been a nasty breakup between Eden and Adam.

  “Sure,” Jarrod said, already knowing his answer came too quick to be believable. “She’s got the new boyfriend so they’ve been holed up.”

  “Right.” Zach frowned. “Well, tell her I miss her face.”

  “I’ll pass it on.” Jarrod took a second to strip off his dirty gloves and throw on a new pair.

  “How about you? You seem off today.”

  Jarrod shrugged. He’d known Zach awhile now. Granted, he’d been on the other side of the counter before, a customer not an employee. Still, if he was that easy to read, Jarrod needed to get better at hiding his worry. “Just tired. I’m sorry.”

  He’d spent the previous night out with Eden searching for any sign of Gabe, scouring block after block, alleys and cafes and dark corners. Too many hours of rushing adrenaline. The three hours of sleep he’d gotten last night left him feeling drugged, disoriented.

  The shuffling approach of another customer brought him back to the counter.

  “What can I get you?” he asked. When there was no answer, he glanced up. The girl at the counter stared at his hands, her expression vacant from what he could see behind lanky black hair. He waved one hand in front of her. “Order?”

  “Oh,” she said, as if suddenly realizing there was a line behind her. Her eyes jumped to the menu. “Surprise me with something.”

  “You got it.” Jarrod turned, throwing together a mix of flavors and steamed milk. He tossed some whipped cream on top and slid the cup across the counter as he took her twenty-dollar bill. When he dropped the change into her hand, she whimpered.

  He froze instinctively. He knew he hadn’t passed her Touch. His gloves were fresh and he hadn’t made contact. Even if he had, she wouldn’t have felt effects for hours. He eyed the girl. She stared back, her teeth digging into a chapped lip. A few minute cracks started to seep maroon. The girl didn’t seem to care at all.

  “We good here?” he asked slowly.

  Glassy eyed, she wandered off to a table without responding.

  Jarrod watched her, unsure if he should mention her to Zach. If the girl was a regular, maybe he knew something about her, something that would account for her bizarre reaction to his hands. Normal customers didn’t get all wigged out when he handed them their change. But she didn’t act like a Sider, either.

  Something familiar about her struck him. Something…

  The color drained from his face. The girl reminded him of Libby.

  Jarrod moved aside as Zach rang up the next customer, studying the girl around a display of overpriced tea bags. Libby, who’d infiltrated their crew and betrayed them to Luke. She’d been able to kill Siders the same way Eden could, had killed James before they’d known what she was and before she’d taken out Adam on the roof.

  Eden had turned Libby to ash in his arms. He knew this girl wasn’t her. Still, the first night Libby had found their crew, when she’d been amping up the “cheerleader in distress” act— this girl gave off a vibe like that, like she was in trouble. Except something in her eyes, that split lip, made him believe she wasn’t acting. She’d clearly had a rough night. A rough year.

  She looked like she needed help.

  “Well, now. She decided to grace us with her presence after all,” Zach said.

  Jarrod’s attention whipped to the counter. Eden smirked at him from the other side, Az behind her.

  “I told Zach I didn’t know if you’d be in today. Needed a caffeine fix, eh?” Jarrod said. Unless they’d found Gabe. He gave Eden a closer look. “Anything new?”

  “You only left a little bit ago. Our lives aren’t that exciting.”

  Jarrod caught the sarcasm and let it set him at ease.

  “Think you can handle making me something?” Eden asked, changing the subject.

  He turned to grab a cup but Zach was already there.

  “She’s easy. Always the same order and she leaves a kickass tip,” Zach said, setting a large coffee cup in front of Eden. “Best kind of customer.”

  He leaned closer to Eden and wiped at her cheek with a gloved hand.

  She jerked away, her palm raising to her face.

  “Sorry,” he said. “You had something black on you.”

  She scooted back, into Az. “What was it?”

  Zach shrugged. “A fuzz or something,” he said. He tilted his chin up at Az. “Want anything?”

  Az stared at the menu board for a second before giving up. “I don’t know, surprise me.”

  Jarrod couldn’t help but glance in the direction the girl had gone. “Nobody’ll make a decision today,” he mumbled.

  From a table far back in the corner, the girl stared at him. No. She focused slightly in front of him. On Eden. Jarrod nodded in the girl’s direction. “You know her?” he asked Eden.

  Eden and Az turned. The girl didn’t look away.

  Az slipped his arm around Eden’s waist. “She sure seems interested.”

  Jarrod tapped the order into the cash register and grabbed the bill Eden held out. “I rang her up. She seemed bizarre,” he said as he made change.

  “Like bizarre how?” Eden leaned on the counter, gauging his reaction.

  Jarrod hesitated. He didn’t want to overreact. Eden would be even more exhausted than him. The last thing he wanted to do was send her into a sleep deprived paranoia. But staying silent wasn’t an option either. “Jumpy around my hands,” he settled on.

  “You didn’t—” Eden paled, waving away her change, the motion a double meaning.

  “Of course not,” Jarrod said. He tilted his head at the girl. “But there’s something off about her.”

  Eden turned to Az. “Any thoughts?”

  Jarrod heard what she’d really asked Az: Was it the Bound? The Fallen? He fought to keep the fear off his face. Zach knew nothing of Upstairs or Downstairs, any angels, and for now it was best things stay that way. Az shook his head and Jarrod released a breath.

  “I’ll keep an eye on her,” Jarrod said. He grabbed a cup, filled it with black coffee for Az, and handed it over.

  “Let me know. Az and I are going to head to the Bronx.” Eden paused. “Kristen needs to know about Gabe. The truth. We can use her help looking for him.”

  Jarrod followed her down the counter as she moved toward the door. If she was going to Kristen, Eden must have been way more spent than she let on. “You want to wait until I get off?” he asked.

  They hadn’t told Kristen about Gabe’s Fall. He wasn’t sure exactly what Eden had told her about what happened that morning. It hadn’t mattered to him. It wasn’t like Kristen was a friend of theirs.

  Eden shook her head. “No, we’ve got it.”

  Before they went outside, Eden turned back. Even from the counter, Jarrod saw the way she hesitated before her eyes sparked with defiance. Whatever she was about to say, he wasn’t going to like it.

  “Az and I are going out later. Tonight. Just us.”

  Jarrod grabbed a rag from the counter, swiped angrily. “Shouldn’t you rest or something? I thought the point of telling Kristen was getting backup. You look like shit, Eden.”

  Eden’s glare burned into him as Az strode back to the counter.

  Their date night thing seemed an unnecessary chance, though he couldn’t really be too pissed since they all searched for Gabe every night. The problem was how exhausted Eden looked. She was pushing herself, too hard. She’d done it before, when she’d been killing the Siders and the buildup of Touch had messed her up. Now she tested her limits again. And like last time, it fell on Jarrod to play the asshole.

  “I’m not asking per
mission,” Eden said and strode toward the exit.

  “Listen, don’t be like this,” Az said, his voice cool, low enough not to carry to Eden. “We’ve all been through hell, man. But that girl,” he pointed back to Eden, “deserves something happy. One night, Jarrod. She needs it.” There was a pause. “I need it.” Az shifted closer to be sure Jarrod caught his meaning.

  Jarrod wiped down the espresso machine, focusing on it so he wouldn’t give away his anger. He didn’t trust Az. Not when at any moment he could snap. He’d seen what the Fallen could do. “If you’re having trouble not Falling, you should have told us.”

  “And now I have.” Az stepped back from the counter. “We won’t be too late. We’ll both have phones.” He swung the door open for Eden.

  “Jarrod!” Eden’s eyes flicked to the back of the coffee shop. “Be careful.”

  When he turned the strange girl raised a hand, her fingers twitching in a half wave. Jarrod didn’t look away until she faltered, going back to her coffee. Whatever trouble she was in, he wanted no part of it.

  Chapter 4

  The last time Eden had ridden the train to Kristen’s, Gabe had been with her. They’d been going to Kristen for help getting Az back from Luke. She felt as hopeless now as she did then. At least this time there would be no death. No Falling.

  Eden tried to lose herself in the rhythm of the train, but the familiar guilt rolled over her. Now it was Az beside her, and Kristen would be the one devastated.

  They’d lied to Kristen.

  No, Eden thought, I lied to her. Minutes after Luke had stumbled away that morning, Kristen had called. Jarrod had still been so broken, Az barely holding out against the Fall himself. Eden hardly remembered the conversation, only the frantic tone of Kristen’s voice. Rapid fire questions.

  What happened? Did Az Fall?

  Eden had done her best to get the details out as fast as possible, her attention on Jarrod, on Az.

  Didn’t Gabriel find you, Kristen had asked.

  It was only then that Eden realized she’d left out everything about Gabriel’s Fall.