Big Beautiful Witches: I Married A Warlock

by Georgette St. Clair

  It was weak of her to let her mother’s vicious verbal lashings hurt her like this. She should be used to it by now. She’d endured it her entire life, her mother’s constant reminders of how her rolls, her curves, were horribly unbecoming to a witch, and the terrible pain she caused her mother by not subjecting herself to weight loss herbs.

  She’d tried the treatments, couldn’t bear them. She’d starved herself until she was sick and weak. But finally, much to her mother’s disgust, she gave up and accepted that she was a big-boned girl and that she’d look the way she was supposed to.

  Darkness fell quickly, and the silence was eerie. Fiona’s was the last street in the neighborhood where streetlamps crackled with spellectricity, bathing the street in white faerie light. She and the other merchants paid for that privilege, as well as the protection runes on their storefronts, but there was no light here. Here were abandoned buildings inhabited by ghouls and lone werewolves and rogue vampires and human gangs who’d sold their souls to dark magic, and other denizens of the night.

  Suddenly she stopped in her tracks. She heard a snuffling sound from the alley just behind her. Immediately behind her. In between her and the store.

  She was deep in the heart of the Graveyard now, and darkness had swallowed her. She’d been in such a hurry to get away from her mother that she’d rushed out without her pocketbook. Her wand, all of her charms, all of her weapons, were in her pocketbook.

  It was beyond foolish of her to be in this part of the Graveyard without any defenses; it was suicidal. Her powerful plant magic was virtually useless here, caged in by concrete as she was. The nearest trees, sickly and small, that she could sense, were blocks away.

  It wasn’t the first time she’d let her mother harass her into losing her wits, but it was very likely going to be the last.

  The sound was getting closer, along with a foul odor that assaulted her nostrils. Her chest tightened with fear. Goblin. He’d steal the clothes from her body and crack her bones for the marrow. There’d be nothing left of her body by sunrise.

  She quickened her pace. There was a weed choked lot several blocks ahead; maybe, just maybe, if she could make it to the lot in time she could grow the plants fast enough to tangle up the goblin’s feet so she could run for it. She had no other options.

  She broke into a run, with the heavy thud of footsteps pounding behind her and dread filling her like helium, swelling throughout her body. She only made it half a block before he flung his heavy body onto her, sending her sprawling onto the sidewalk.

  She only had time for a brief, blinding second of terror – and then the weight was gone and she had a vague impression of something flying through the air and hitting the wall of a building with a sickening crunch, and then falling to the ground with a wet plop.

  “Fancy meeting a nice girl like you in a place like this.” She looked up, stunned. It couldn’t be. It was, but it couldn’t be.

  Erik Bloodstone, home from the Troll Wars.

  Chapter Four

  “Explain to me again why I shouldn’t have you committed to a mental asylum for walking through this neighborhood at night without protection. For walking through this neighborhood at all.”

  Erik and Fiona were strolling back towards her shop. She was hugging herself to keep her hands from shaking. Her heart was pounding inside her chest, and she felt tingly all over; she told herself that it was from her near death encounter, not because Erik was back.

  But she knew the truth. Tingliness sweeping through her body, concentrated in the nether regions, pounding heart, shaking hands, swelling nipples…those were all Erik-related symptoms.

  “Two words. My mother.”

  “Your mother wanted you to walk through this neighborhood at night?” He skewered her with a skeptical look.

  Fiona shook her head in exasperation. “No, my mother came by the shop with some pathetic washrag who she wants me to marry, and I got so frazzled I literally ran out of the shop without my bag of charms and weapons, and the next thing you know, a goblin is sizing me up for his dinner plate.” She laughed bitterly. “It would have to be an extra large dinner plate.”

  Erik glanced down at her with a gleam in his eye, and a smile curving his lips. “I like your curves.”

  Fiona managed a rueful smile. “That makes one of you.”

  “You always were too hard on yourself. I guess with a mother like yours it’s inevitable. You did well to move away from her.”

  She shrugged. “Not everyone would say that it’s a step up.”

  “What about you? Are you happy here? Other than nearly becoming a goblin snack?”

  Fiona almost blurted out “A goblin five-course meal, you mean.” She had to struggle with a tendency not to put herself down, especially after encounters with her mother.

  But instead, she said “I am happy here. The only people I could serve with my plant magic in my mother’s neighborhood were old men who wanted an herb that would stiffen their wand when they visited their mistress, or spoiled society women who want to look prettier than all their friends. Here, I can really help people.”

  “I’ve heard that you do wonders here. I’ve heard that your store is such a marvel that the cream of high society actually flock to see you, even in this hellhole.”

  “You’ve been asking about me?” Fiona couldn’t help herself; an ember of warmth flared inside her, as well as a sense of wonder. Erik always seemed to be genuinely interested in her, in what she was doing.

  It made no sense.

  Then again, Erik was one of the most genuinely decent people that she knew. He came from an upper class family, like she did, but he always treated all members of society, from the beggar and the lunatic to the Council Wardens, as his equal.

  He was kind to her out of pity, she suspected.

  They arrived back at her shop to find Renoir standing outside, with the shop door locked, key in one hand, Fiona’s purse in the other. His delicate features were wrinkled with worry, but he smiled when he saw her.

  “Well, you’re a hot mess,” Renoir said, handing her the purse. “What were you thinking, running into that neighborhood without protection? When tall, blond and handsome came by the shop looking for you just now, I told him he had to go get you right away.”

  “Oh,” Fiona said, surprised. “Renoir, your little fairy butt saved my life tonight!”

  Erik had been looking for her? She had been so shaken up by the attack that she hadn’t even stopped to question how Erik happened to be in exactly the right place at the right time.

  “I can never tell if she means fairy or faerie. You know what I mean?” Renoir said to Erik, who looked baffled.

  Fiona managed a shaky laugh. “Renoir, let’s be real here – you’re the fairiest faerie I know.”

  “Speaking of which, I have a date at Sticks & Stones with the most delightfully butch elf you could possibly imagine, so I must dash. If I’m late he’ll whip my heinie – which is why I’m going to fly there veeery slowly,” he added with a wink. His glimmering wings, which he kept folded tight against his back inside the shop, popped open and spread wide, and suddenly he was hovering several inches from the ground. “Toodles!” And he flew off north, with a cheery wave.

  “That must be so great. I’d love fairy wings,” Fiona sighed enviously. Then she turned back to Erik. “Thank you again, Erik. How long have you been back in town?”

  “Two weeks. It took me a while to find you. I stopped by your house, but your mother pretended that she had no idea where you were. Seemed to think that I was there to arrest you. Is there anything that you want to tell me?” his blue eyes twinkled.

  She tipped her head back to look up at him, a smile quirking her lips. “Well, you do realize that my mother always expects the worst where I’m concerned.”

  “Is she wrong? I used to think that Maizie always dragged you into trouble, but then I realized that you hung out with Maizie because you like trouble.”

  Fiona hid a smile behind her
hand, but didn’t bother to deny it. Erik knew her too well.

  “I’ve mostly been staying out of trouble. Or I haven’t been caught. Take your pick.”

  “I do carry restraints with me, you know.” His smile broadened, and she felt her breath quicken. “If I needed to arrest you…I know how you could serve your time.”

  She felt a wave of warmth roll over her, and moisture rushed to the cleft between her legs. Her cheeks flushed, and she imagined herself naked, wrists tied, while Erik had his wicked way with her…

  Of course he’d see everything. Her fleshy thighs, her rounded belly, her plump arms…

  “So, why were you looking for me tonight? And at my mother’s house?” she asked hastily, to change the subject.

  He glanced up at the stairs to the left of the shop. “You live above the shop, right? Let me walk you up to your house and we’ll talk there.”

  Erik wants to come to my house? She thought, marveling. Good lord…was there any possibility, the faintest possibility, that he…wanted to seduce her?

  Because she was so down with that. Sure, he was a cop, and sure, she was a quasi-criminal who sold semi-legal herbs under the counter and hung out with a very sketchy crew, but to see Erik Bloodstone? Naked? She’d magic her clothes off so fast…

  She followed him up the rusty metal stairway and pressed her palm against the protection rune on the side of her front door. Erik frowned at it critically; it was far from the most expensive rune, but she couldn’t afford that kind of protection. It was good enough to stop the neighborhood lowlifes who might try to break in.

  Inside, the lights sprang on as they walked in. Colorful Oriental rugs were spread on the floor, mismatched, brightly painted furniture scattered throughout, and the air was sweet with the scent of a thousand flowers. There were flowerpots on the floor, on shelves, on counters. Plants growing in jars and planters and cups and bowls. Plants thrived anywhere that Fiona spent any time.

  “Do you want me to make you some tea?” Erik asked. “You should sit down. You had quite a scare back there.”

  “I’m fine,” Fiona insisted. “I’ve been in tighter spots.” That wasn’t true; that had been pretty damned close.

  Erik ignored her, rummaging through her kitchen cupboards, pulling out two coffee mugs and filling a teapot with hot water, which he then set on the stove.

  He looked so at home in her kitchen, and it felt so right to have him there, that it made her heart hurt. It made her yearn for impossible things.

  “Are you sure you’re all right? I could take you to a doctor.”

  Fiona shook her head. “There are advantages to being a larger woman, Erik. We’re well padded. And we bounce back quickly.”

  “You weren’t just making another fat joke at your own expense, were you? I might have to spank you next time you do that.” He smiled again, and poured tea into two cups.

  Fiona blushed. Why did he keep doing that? Had he always been this flirtatious? She couldn’t remember; she hadn’t seen him in years…except in her fantasies.

  He set the tea down in front of her, and sat down at the small round kitchen table across from her. She took a healthy sip of the raspberry tea, savoring its sweet warmth.

  “So, about why I came here tonight,” he said. “How would you like to make a thousand dollars?”

  Fiona’s choked on her tea. “I’m sorry, I…what?” Was he proposing what she thought he was proposing?

  And would she say yes?

  Sex with Erik, and a thousand dollars? Maybe…

  Erik threw back his head and roared with laughter. “That didn’t come out the way that I meant it to. You don’t have to do anything illegal or immoral for it…unless you want to. I want to hire you as a paid consultant to help me investigate thefts down at the warehouse district. I can pay you five hundred up front, and the rest if we solve the case. Possibly even more; my understanding is that the merchants have put up a reward for the identities of the culprits.”

  “Me? I…” She took a quick sip of tea, bending down to hide the disappointment that flooded through her.

  Of course. He hadn’t come up to her apartment to seduce her. He’d only come by looking for her because of her green witch powers. Not because he was interested in her in any other way. Had she actually let herself think that for a moment? She was a fool. An utter fool.

  “I don’t know, Erik,” she said, staring out the window without seeing anything. “I don’t see how my powers could help in this case.”

  And she was reminded yet again why she’d always avoided spending time with Erik in the past, why she turned him down when he invited her out for coffee or a drink, pretending to be too busy. Being around him was painful; he was the craving she couldn’t indulge in, the itch she couldn’t scratch, the one addiction her herbs wouldn’t cure.

  And despite three years of his absence, the moment she’d set eyes on him, the longing inside her pulsed just as fiercely. She could really use the extra money, but at what cost to her peace of mind?

  “There’s two reasons you’re perfect for this job,” Erik continued enthusiastically. “One, you know this neighborhood, you know the people here. People are more likely to talk to you than to me. They trust you. And two, nobody expects that a green witch will be investigating, so they won’t have taken countermeasures. They’ll wear gloves so they don’t leave fingerprints, masks and hats so the video surveillance cameras can’t capture a picture of their faces, use charms to cloud their auras so we can’t pick up what species they are…but nobody will think about whatever plant matter they may be leaving behind. Plant matter that you can sense and that we can use to narrow down our search for a culprit.”

  “That sounds…speculative. Has it ever been tried before?’

  “No. Again, that’s why it’s so perfect.” He took a long drink of tea. “So what do you say?”

  It sounded suspiciously like a pity gig to her, and if there was one thing she did not want from Erik, it was his pity. To say nothing of the fact that she might very well end up implicating friends or neighbors.

  “No, thanks, Erik. I couldn’t in good conscience take your money. We have no idea if it would work, and I’m very busy with the herb shop this season. The money I make right before the Crystal Ball pretty much carries me through the rest of the year.”

  “The Crystal Ball…are you going?” There was something odd about the way he asked it, as if the answer meant a great deal to him. But why would that be? He sure as Hades wasn’t planning on popping the question.

  Sometimes she couldn’t figure him out at all.

  “I’m working with the Florists’ Guild to do some flower displays at the beginning of the ball. There’s a long archway of vines that everybody will walk through to get inside and as they walk through, I’ll make them burst into flower. That kind of thing.”

  “But you’re staying after the beginning, right?” He was staring at her intently.

  “Uh...maybe. I guess. Sure.” Because there was nothing more fun for a single girl than watching a bunch of love-struck warlocks proposing to the beautiful witches of their dreams.

  He relaxed and broke out in a smile.

  “Now, about that consultant gig. I really need you to work with me. You’re the only consultant that I’d consider hiring, because I need someone who is familiar with the area and who I also know and trust. If you won’t work with me, it will take me much longer to solve the case.”

  “You trust me?” Fiona raised an eyebrow skeptically. “I thought I was a troublemaker.”

  He grinned. “That’s part of your charm.”

  Fiona shook her head. “I can’t do it, Erik. Find someone else.”

  “Is this partly because you think you might end up helping to bust one of your friends?”

  “Of course not,” Fiona said.

  Of course it was.

  Damn it, Erik really did know her too well.

  “Hear me out. There is considerable pressure to solve this case, because mer
chants are losing money. That means that if there are no arrests soon, the Enforcers will send down squadrons to protect the warehouses. That isn’t good for anyone in this district. There may be purges. Entire blocks cleared. Hundreds of people carted off to prison. It’s an election year; that would play out really well in the press.”

  Fiona swallowed hard. The entire district would be in danger if the Enforcers moved in here.

  She couldn’t let that happen. He had her right where he wanted her. “You’re good, Erik,” she said.

  “Yes, I am. I always get what I want.” He was staring at her right now, blue eyes like the ocean, stormy and mysterious.

  A lightning storm of desire sizzled and crackled throughout her body, and she felt her nipples swell and strain against the fabric of her shirt. There was a steady pulsing between her legs, a desperate ache for him to fill her, to thrust inside her savagely…

  As if reading her mind, he stood up and slowly walked over to her. He moved with an easy animal grace, the sensation of power shimmering from him in palpable waves. When he reached her he stood towering above her, staring down at her with a mixture of tenderness and desire, and her breath caught in her throat. She sat frozen in her seat.

  Then Erik leaned down and…kissed her forehead.

  It was the briefest, gentle kiss, but it sent a burst of arousal sizzling through her body, and she shivered in the warm night air.

  “I have some cases I have to address in the morning. I’ll be by the shop tomorrow afternoon to pick you up so we can visit the warehouses and see what you can detect,” he said.

  She clutched at the arms of her chair, feeling as if someone had yanked the rug out from underneath her and she hadn’t hit the ground yet.

  “All…all right,” she stammered, head whirling.

  Why did he have to torment her like this? Act as if he wanted her one second, and then kiss her on the forehead like she was just an old friend the next?