Fox Lost (The Madison Wolves)

by Robin Roseau

  "Foolish little fox," she said.

  "Are you angry with me, Lara?"

  "I wish you hadn't done it. Did you really drink from her?"

  "Don't be jealous."

  Lara gathered me into her arms, hugging me tightly. "Do you still love me?" she whispered.

  "Oh honey, yes," I said.

  "But now you love her, too?"

  I thought about it. I could feel Carissa inside me, and the thought pleased me.

  "Yes, but not the same," I said. "Do not be jealous."

  "I am, a little," she said. "I know what it means for you to have drunk from her."

  "Tell me," I said.

  "You belong to her. You will obey her more than you have ever obeyed me. I am not happy about this."

  "You're jealous of that!"

  "Yes, and I wish you hadn't done this, little fox."

  I pushed away. "We have to help."

  "We do now," she replied.

  "You didn't even try to talk me out of it, Lara."

  "No, I didn't. Your instincts are usually good."

  I pulled her to me, holding onto her fiercely. We held each other for a while, then suddenly I felt Carissa calling me.

  "I'm sorry," I said, climbing from bed. "She is calling me."

  "Stay with me," Lara said, clasping my hands

  But Carissa was calling me.

  "No," I said. "I have to go to her."

  "Stay with me, Little Fox. Resist her."

  "No!" I said, struggling. "Let me go, Lara. She's calling me!"

  Instead, Lara tried to pull me more tightly to her, but Carissa was calling, and I fought my mate, struggling with her. "Lara, please, she is calling me. I have to go to her. Please let me go."

  And then the call grew more insistent, and it started to hurt.

  "Lara, please," I whimpered. "It hurts. I have to go to her."

  I continued to struggle, and then Lara released me.

  "I'm sorry," I said. I fled the room, and somehow I knew exactly where I needed to go. I ran through the corridors, Lara chasing after me. Twice, she caught me, and I struggled and fought with her, and she released me.

  And then I was with her, with Carissa, and I crossed the room to her.

  "Kneel, Michaela," she ordered, and I knelt in front of her, my head bowed, waiting for my next order.

  Lara arrived a moment later. She came to a stop. I could hear her behind me. But still I waited for Carissa.

  "This is wrong," Lara said to her.

  "You needed to know," Carissa said. "She agreed to help me, and she agreed to this. She has agreed to try. If she returns to me and tells me she is unable to help, I will release her."

  "You will order her to see to her safety, Carissa," Lara said.

  "Yes," she said. Carissa reached out with a hand and lifted my face towards hers. "Michaela, you agreed to try."

  "Yes, Carissa," I said.

  She smiled, and I was filled with happiness.

  "You will take no undue risks. If you cannot do this, you will return to me and tell me."

  "I want to help," I said.

  "I know you do," she replied. "But I would be a poor friend if I let you throw your life away. And so you must see to your safety. You'll do that for me, won't you?"

  "Yes, Carissa."

  "Good." She caressed my cheek, and it sent a wave of pleasure through me.

  "Alpha," my mistress said, "I know the thrall angers you, but it was necessary."

  "Why?" Lara asked her, and I could hear her anger. She shouldn't take that tone with Carissa.

  "Several reasons. Will you listen to them?"

  Lara crossed the room to stand next to me. "Michaela, get up."

  I didn't move. I kept my head bowed, waiting for my mistress to order me.

  Lara began growling. Carissa did nothing, but Lara's anger pierced through to me, a little.

  "Lara," I whispered. "Please don't."

  "Get up," she said.

  It was difficult. My mistress had called me, and I still felt the call, but my mate needed me. I reached out a hand to Lara. She gave me her hand and would have pulled me to my feet, but I pulled her hand to my chest and held it tightly to me, still not rising.

  "Lara," Carissa said gently, "the effect she is currently feeling will fade, partly with distance from me but even more as my call wears off. The fact that she can even acknowledge you right now speaks to her strength, but you are causing her stress."

  "Why was this necessary," Lara asked.

  "You must hear all the reasons before you respond, Alpha," Carissa replied. "Will you listen, for your mate's sake."

  "I will listen," she said. She moved closer to me until we were touching. "But you will vow this is not permanent."

  "It is not," Carissa said. "First, the reason you will dislike the most. We both know as soon as you got her away from me, you would return her to Wisconsin. Now, you must at least allow her to try to help me."

  Lara didn't say anything, but I could hear her heart pounding, the blood moving through her veins.

  I heard as she blinked.

  "Next, a reason you may not care for. Your mate accepted the thrall willingly, with full knowledge. I honestly answered every question she asked. I did so in a display of my trust, and in accepting the thrall, she offered me a great deal of trust. Even if she is unable to help, I will be very grateful. Furthermore, this allows me to trust all of you in a situation where trust is difficult. I feel free to treat you with complete honesty and believe you are doing the same. I know that for the duration of the thrall, she will not betray me, and the fact that she accepted it with full knowledge tells me she is someone I can trust even without the thrall. I extend that trust to you and the enforcers you brought with you. Her acceptance made all this possible."

  "You should not have asked her to do this for you."

  "I am desperate. But I asked, not forced her. I am deeply sorry for how this meeting came about, but I offered no threats other than those necessary to protect my secrets. She offered to help because she wanted to, not because she felt pressured to do so."

  "That is her nature," Lara said. "Foolhardy with her own safety."

  "I do not agree with your assessment. You are blinded by her weaknesses."

  They were silent for a moment. "Were there other reasons?"

  "Yes, and these you will appreciate. This was the only way I could share the ability to sense Deirdre. For that reason alone, it is necessary. Would you agree?"

  "There are other ways-"

  "I do not believe there are," Carissa said. "Deirdre is unlikely to look like any photographs I have of her. She is fae and quite capable of disguising her appearance. She is also quite capable of hiding her supernatural aspect. Michaela will not be fooled. I believe on this issue, if none other, you must agree my information is far more accurate than yours."

  "Fine," said Lara.

  "The thrall gives her some protection from others of my kind," Carissa explained. "She will have some ability to detect us where before she could not. It is not great, but it may help. More importantly, while she is enthralled to me, she cannot be enthralled by any other vampire without killing me first. My maker could have taken her from me, but he was destroyed over two hundred years ago."

  Carissa allowed Lara to consider that, and after a moment, Lara asked, "Anything else?"

  "Yes. The thrall strengthens her. Her senses are all sharper. She is stronger, with greater endurance, and her already impressive reaction times are even enhanced."

  "Her mind is her greatest weapon," Lara said. "And like this, it is like she is mindless."

  "In that regard, she will be back to normal by the time you land in North Carolina. I have probably interfered with your relationship for a day or two, but even in that, she will be back to normal tomorrow or the day after."

  "Until you call her again."

  "If you support her in this task for me, I will not do so."

  "And so you coerce my pack."
r />   "You made very little effort to dissuade her from helping me, Alpha. Were you going to coerce her to forsake me?"

  The room was quiet for several moments. I listened to Lara. I heard her blink. I heard her as she clenched and unclenched her hand, the one I wasn't holding.

  I heard nothing from my mistress. She remained utterly silent, except when she moved, but when she had been talking, I heard her take air into her lungs, are she didn't need to breath, but needed for speech.

  I could hear other heartbeats. I listened carefully, and I recognized Elisabeth, Serena, and Karen. The sounds were faint, muffled, coming from somewhere to my right.

  And even fainter, I heard the sounds of the city, well above us.

  "Alpha," said Carissa finally. "Take her to North Carolina. Scout the location. And then call me. If she cannot do this, you may take her home. But I have faith in her. Cannot you share that faith with me?"

  Lara clenched her hand again, and I felt her nearly trembling beside me.

  "She will follow your orders?" Lara asked.

  "To the best of her abilities."

  "Then I want you to order her to obey me, Elisabeth and Serena."

  "She won't thank you for that."

  "No, she won't."

  "Step away from her for a moment. Michaela, release your mate."

  I immediately released Lara's hand, and she stepped away. Carissa stepped closer and placed a hand on my cheek, and I was filled with love.

  "Lara, I will not make this a permanent order. I would not do that to her."

  "Until this is over."

  "Until you return to Wisconsin."

  "Yes."

  "Michaela," Carissa said, lifting my face to gaze into hers. She was smiling, and I returned her smile. "From now until you return to Wisconsin, you will follow the orders of Lara, Elisabeth and Serena, excepting when those orders violate orders from me or seek to prevent you from answering my call. Do you understand?"

  "Yes, Carissa."

  She caressed my cheek. "Stand up, Michaela."

  I rose immediately, fluidly, my eyes never leaving Carissa's.

  "I am in your debt," she said to me. "I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Whether you are able to help me or not, I wish us to be friends."

  My smile broadened. My mistress wanted us to be friends.

  She continued to look into my eyes, but she spoke to Lara. "Alpha, I would counsel you to issue orders very carefully. Her ability to distinguish between orders and requests or suggestions may be somewhat limited. She is likely to take you very literally, and if you are careless, you risk stealing her will from her when she needs to be free to use her judgment."

  "Please order her to see to her own safety ahead of any orders from us. Will that help?"

  It may. Carissa rubbed a finger against my cheek, tightening my focus on her. "Michaela, did you hear what your alpha has requested?"

  "Yes, Carissa."

  "Do you understand what she wants?"

  "She wants me safe more than she wants me to obey her."

  "You will remember that."

  "Yes, Mistress," I replied.

  "I want you safe more than obeying her orders as well."

  "I understand, Mistress."

  She caressed me again, filling me with pleasure.

  "Michaela, do you understand why you feel the way you do right now?"

  "Yes, Mistress. It is the blood thrall. But I wanted to help you even before we shared blood. I want to meet your fae."

  "Is that why you agreed to this, Michaela?" Lara asked.

  Her words cut into me, distracting me from my mistress.

  "Answer my question, Michaela," Lara said, making her question into an order.

  "Partly," I said. "She promised to protect our babies, and she implied our babies' babies, and perhaps even the babies after them."

  My mistress looked away, and I knew she was looking at my mate. "I have a very, very long memory, Alpha," she said. "Are you still angry with her?"

  "No," Lara said.

  Carissa's gaze returned to me, and I felt pleasure from her smile. "It is time for you to go with your mate," she said. "Go to her now."

  Immediately I turned away, pleased to be able to obey. I turned to Lara and went straight to her. She wrapped her arms around me, pulling me tightly to her. I hesitated for a moment, then wrapped my arms around Lara.

  "Her mind will be a fog for several more hours," Carissa said. "After that, she will be largely back to normal, but I would trust her judgment only cautiously for the next twelve hours."

  "I was given to believe time is of the essence."

  "It is, but caution is of greater essence. You may want to let her sleep. She did not tell me of events from last night, but I was given to understand she had already been under some stress. She is resilient, but mortal bodies can absorb only so much without rest."

  I felt Lara nod.

  "We may go?" Lara asked.

  "Yes. Thank you, Alpha."

  "Do not thank me," Lara said. "I'm not doing any of this for you." Lara released me then lifted my face to here. "Can you answer me, Michaela?"

  "Yes, Lara," I said. But then I looked over my shoulder to Carissa.

  "Go with your mate now," she ordered. "Thank you, Michaela."

  I turned back to Lara and let her draw me away, pleased to follow her. She held me with an arm around my back, and we passed through two rooms and a short corridor before arriving at Carissa's sitting room. Elisabeth, Serena and Karen jumped to their feet as we arrived.

  "Little Fox," said Elisabeth. "You have been naughty."

  "Leave her alone," Lara said. "She's not herself right now."

  Elisabeth crossed the room to stand in front of me. I looked at her blindly, then turned my head to watch Lara. I didn't say anything.

  "Is she all right?"

  "She will be," Lara said. "For now, be careful of any orders you give her. I'll explain once we get out of here. Elisabeth, you're in charge."

  "Karen, you're on point," Elisabeth said immediately. "Serena, you have Michaela."

  I didn't take my eyes from Lara, but I heard Serena as she stepped to my other side, taking my arm.

  "Do what Serena says, Michaela," Lara said.

  "My mistress told me to go with you," I said.

  "We're all going together," Lara said. "Do you understand?"

  "Yes, Lara."

  "Stay with Serena," she said. "Let her protect you."

  "Yes, Lara," I said again.

  "What the hell?" asked Elisabeth.

  "Later," Lara said. "Get us out of here."

  "Let's go, Karen," Elisabeth said.

  Karen headed to the door, and Serena tugged on my arm. I went complacently where she pulled me, my mind a fog. Carissa told me to go with Lara. Carissa told me to obey Lara, Elisabeth and Serena. I would go. I would obey.

  * * * *

  It was the same plane I had taken last night. Karen searched the airplane while Serena and I waited in the car. I kept my gaze on Serena. Lara had told me to obey Serena and to stay with her, so I watched her carefully.

  Then Elisabeth opened the door. She reached for me, but I shied away, clutching Serena.

  "Go with Elisabeth," Serena said.

  And so, of course, I did, moving into her arms. She drew me from the car, and then Serena was at my side. She grabbed my arm and tried to pull me from Elisabeth, but she had told me to go with Elisabeth, and Elisabeth wasn't moving. I clung to Elisabeth, resisting Serena's tug on my arm.

  "Michaela," Serena said. "Come with me."

  "Yes, Serena," I said, immediately releasing Elisabeth and returning my focus to Serena. She pulled me to the aircraft. We climbed the short stairs, and I got my first look at the interior.

  It was very plush, although I noticed Serena had to duck her head. I remembered other aircraft where the wolves had to duck.

  Serena drew me into the cabin.

  There were six seats waiting for us, just like the last a
irplane of this size I had ridden in. I knew Serena would order me into the first seat, and so I reached with my hand and set my fingers over her lips.

  She turned to me.

  "Please don't make me sit alone."

  "Are you able to pick where you want us to sit?" she asked kindly. She began walking backwards down the center of the aisle, drawing me after her, holding only my hands. We reached the cluster of four seats, two facing forward, two facing aft.

  I tried to answer her question, but my thoughts were muddled. I was supposed to go with her. It was difficult to think.

  "Michaela," Serena said gently. "We must sit now. Tell me which seat you want."

  I pointed to the aft-facing seat on the left side of the airplane.

  "Sit there, Michaela," she said. I turned to the seat and immediately sat down, then sat watching her.

  "Buckle your seat belt," she ordered, and so I did, buckling it around me, but not tightening it.

  "Michaela," Serena said, "Tighten the seat belt properly the way you know how."

  That helped, and I snugged the seat belt, then looked back at her, waiting for my next order.

  "Michaela," Serena said, "Tell me where you want me to sit."

  I pointed to the seat directly in front of me.

  "All right," she said. "Tell me where you want Lara to sit."

  That was harder. I began to struggle, and I felt a tear slide from my eye.

  "Michaela, stop," Serena said. She crouched down immediately in front of me. "Tell me what is wrong."

  "Lara is alpha."

  "Yes, she is."

  "Elisabeth gets sick if she faces backwards."

  "Michaela, tell me where you want Lara to sit. If she doesn't like your choice, she knows she can make changes."

  I pointed to the seat next to me. Lara and I could hold hands.

  "Why did you pick this seat?" Serena asked.

  "I wanted to hold Lara's hand, but Elisabeth gets sick if she faces backwards."

  "I am going to ask you a few more questions. If it is difficult for you to answer, you will tell me."

  "Yes, Serena," I said. That was an easy order.

  "Are there other things you want?"

  "Yes."

  "Are you able to tell me about them?"

  "I want to help my mistress."

  Her face clouded, and then she nodded.

  "Anything else?"

  "I want Lara to kiss me. I want all of you to touch me. If Lara orders me to sleep, I want to be surrounded by all of you. I want to know if Angel and Scarlett are okay. I want to know if my babies are okay. I want you to forgive me. I want Lara and Elisabeth to forgive me. I want to know why Lara made Carissa order me to obey her, you and Elisabeth, but not Karen. I want to be safe. I want my babies to be safe."