Smoke & Fire - Adult Paranormal Romance Series, Book #1

by Michele Wesley

  Damn, so freaking cute when he is all shy, and those damn glasses, make him look innocent when I know the truth. Stopping her wayward thoughts, she said, “I don’t offend easily, so you can tell me what’s on your mind. As your partner, it’s my job to make sure you’re okay, mentally and physically.”

  His throat tightened, but he pushed his voice through the tiny cracks. He said, “I’m concerned because… it’s kind of crazy, and I feel like a total guy for saying this, but… I enjoy being close to you… feels nice, like I’m doing something wrong because I’m enjoying it. Since I am working, I feel as if I’m not supposed to enjoy it. I try to discipline myself to be more nonchalant, but I’m really attracted to you. I feel like I’m crossing a line that maybe I shouldn’t be crossing, and it makes me not know how I should respond to you.” He realized he hadn’t explained himself well, but he didn’t know how. Apparently, she affected his ability to articulate complete concise sentences.

  She could now sense the undercurrent of his feelings in his voice and demeanor. She asked, “Is that it?” He looked confused. She explained, “First, you do a good job. Second, I personally thought you were reserved and tense because you weren’t attracted to me. You know, the whole brown and beige thing. There are still a few people who have been hiding under rocks that still can’t get their heads around it.”

  He shook his head. “Goodness, no! That’s definitely not one of the things I think about when I look at you.”

  Although she didn’t know why it bothered her in the first place, she felt relieved that he’d confirmed being attracted to her. “I personally think it’s good to have an attraction for the other person. It makes the job much easier to pull off. I am attracted to you, makes it much easier to be physical.”

  He visibly relaxed. “I never really thought about it like that.” He took a deep breath and released it. “I’m relieved, knowing that I don’t have to feel guilty for being attracted to you.”

  Singing in his head at this point, Mycale was more than attracted to Sori. She was the opposite of any woman he’d ever been interested in. Most of the women he’d dated lacked substance and he often found himself bored before the relationship got off to a good start. Sori not only had his interest, she’d captured his mind, body, and spirit.

  Speaking in a low tone, she asked, “Would you believe me if I told you I am totally clueless in a real-life relationship?”

  He sat up a bit higher, her words touching him as he thought about her question. “I wouldn’t believe you.”

  Sadness veiled her beautiful face. She said, “It’s true. I have no idea how to handle or even deal with a real relationship because I have never had one. Sure, I go out on those crazy blind dates my brothers set me up on, but I can’t or won’t allow myself to go past the second date. The closest I have come to having a long-term relationship is this job. It seems to give me most of what I need, or what I think I need. As far as relationships go, I study, analyze, copy, and imitate what is supposed to happen, and am pretty good at pulling it off.”

  She gauged his reaction to her statements, but he kept his face unreadable. She continued, “I have gone so long without anyone in my life, I am beginning to think that maybe it is what was intended for me. If it weren’t for my brothers, I honestly think I would have lost every shred of what little humanity I have left in me.”

  This was the first time he had ever seen her with an expression he could actually read. She looked so sad it broke his heart. She kept going, “If you think about it, I can’t logically have a healthy relationship with anyone. One, this job, two, I don’t have the patience or the experience. But, sometimes I do wonder.”

  Happy she was sharing so much with him a spark of happiness touched Mycale’s face and lit up his eyes. He said, “I don’t agree with you. You can do whatever you want.”

  His statement sparked her interest, sending both her eyebrows up.

  He continued, “You opened yourself to your brothers, not completely, but enough that they know that you love them the best way you know how. To me, that is enough proof that you can make it work with someone if you really wanted to.”

  Squinting his eyes at her, he said, “So let me get this straight, you’ve never had a boyfriend? Ever? Never met someone that made you happy and filled you with excitement?”

  She didn’t have to think about it. “No.”

  “Sori, that’s very hard to believe, you never having had a real relationship. I have seen the way guys react to you. You can have anybody you want.”

  “It’s more than just having someone. Think about what we do for a living. We just killed four men and dumped their bodies in the ocean. If any normal guy would have seen me only moments ago torture that man for information the way I did, he would have run screaming the other way.”

  Biting his lip, Mycale tried to hide a smile. He agreed, “You’ve got a good point. Not many can handle bodies dropping all over the place.”

  She continued, “That’s the kind of work-related drama I think about when I’m on a date. I think about the possibility of getting an innocent person caught in the crosshairs of something meant for me. I’m not selfish enough to drag someone into something like this, not even for a short fling. So by the time I get to a second date, I’m thinking, do I really want this person’s blood on my hands?”

  Where was this all coming from? Sori stared over at Mycale, not believing she was sharing her innermost thoughts with him like this. She said, “Since I’m telling you all of my business, when was the last time you’ve been out on a date, mister?”

  He smiled his reply, “You got me. It’s been a long time, but hey, we are talking about you right now. I think that you are way too beautiful a woman, likable, and smart not to have had some romance in your life, even if it’s in tiny doses.”

  The last thing Mycale wanted was her trying to sort through what he called a life, so he’d swiftly changed the subject.

  It wasn’t lost on her how quickly he’d change the subject, but his calling her beautiful touched her. She said, “Thank you for saying that. My brothers can blend normal and agent life and make it look easy, but I can’t. The second closest thing I had to a relationship was when I started this TC case. As sick as it sounds, I was actually attracted to Santos. I knew the relationship would be temporary, so I let myself be in it.”

  As he tried to fight back another smile, Mycale couldn’t keep a straight face. “Archer Santos also known as Micky Banks. I know. I listened to the tapes.”

  Sori’s eyes grew wide. She asked, “You heard all of the tapes?”

  Trying to keep his grin from showing, he said, “Yes, but I didn’t find any useful intel. There are some background noises that may be of use, but I didn’t have time to extract the sounds.”

  She gave him a mischievous smile. The thought of him hearing her having sex with another man, oddly, didn’t embarrass her.

  Near blushing thinking about what he had heard on those tapes, Mycale quickly changed the subject. “Well, I think you could really make a guy happy if you ever decide to try.”

  She smiled and said, “You know, you are really good for my confidence.” That he hadn’t outright mentioned what he heard on those tapes made her like him that much more.

  His hand went up in the question positon. “What if you meet someone that would be willing to work with you, know and understand what you do for a living, and is willing to do whatever it took to be with you?”

  Giving a sarcastic laugh, she said, “For someone like, me that sounds like a dream or a Star Trek holodeck fantasy.”

  He was talking about himself but couldn’t work up the nerve to say so. His curiosity had him wondering what if. He couldn’t understand how such a beautiful and smart woman could not have love or romance in her life.

  He wanted so badly to say that he would love to be the one she could share herself with, but filed the
thought in the don’t-be-stupid box inside his head for things better left unsaid.

  Mycale understood her logic well. “You have time to pursue something if you are interested, but always remember that some unlucky guy is out there truly missing out on a great woman.”

  Hiding that his statement did funny things to her, she said, “Thanks. That is one of the sweetest things anyone has ever said to me. I knew there was a reason I liked you.”

  “Do you really?”

  She gave him a friendly tap on the shoulder like the atmosphere around them wasn’t buzzing with a force that drew her to him. “Of course I do. You seem to understand me more than most. You know how to make me not feel so bad about some of the crazy decisions I have made.”

  The intense need to kiss her made him reach onto the desk and pick up a pen that he started twirling. It was time for another subject change. He asked, “Can you teach me how to turn off my feelings?”

  Although surprised by his question, she didn’t show it. Instead, she asked, “What do you mean?”

  Sure of what he was saying, he said, “You can totally turn off everything and not feel. And not just when you kill someone. When you’re with your brothers, you open yourself, not all the way, but just enough. When you’re working, you’re almost always completely closed off. Even now, you trust me just enough to share intimate personal details, but you’re still almost completely closed. Sometimes you’re so closed off I have to actually look at you to know you’re there.”

  His revelation made her wonder about his abilities, especially after what she’d seen him do on the deck.

  He continued, “When you shot that guy tonight and tortured his friend with his own gun, it was like you took what made you Sori and cloaked her somehow. I saw it in your eyes, you had become Smoke. Whatever makes you the beautiful, innocent-looking, caring woman that’s sitting with me right now was not on that deck tonight. You put her somewhere, stored her away from the madness. I want to know how do that?”

  She gave him a long stoic look before she spoke. “You are not the first person to see that part of me, but you are the first to analyze it that way.” It was unbelievable to her that he could read parts of her that she was still trying to understand.

  Taking a deep breath, she began, “When I was fourteen, I was shot in the head. There was a drive-by shooting in my neighborhood. I was in my bed, asleep. I woke to a bullet in my brain, and to this day, I still have pieces of it in my head. While I was in the hospital recovering, I discovered that I could just shut myself off and not feel anything. It was then that my entire outlook on life changed. My life in foster care had been a nightmare, but being able to shut myself off from the world made me feel like I could be and do anything. It was like that bullet touched something in me, flipped a switch that I didn’t even know I had.”

  Just realizing something, she said, “How do you know? How can you know? It’s not physical, it’s internal, a thing I do inside my head. And trust me, it’s not something you want to do to yourself. Sometimes I can go weeks and even months not giving a damn about shit.”

  His face reflected intrigue. “When you’re like that, it seems like nothing frightens or bothers you, like you are filled with this dark shadow you use to fight evil.”

  Again, Mycale surprised her. It seemed he was somehow connected to her secrets. With a far-off look on her face, her voice remained low and calm, “Embracing the darkness is easy, it is my passion to save the innocent, fallen, and forgotten that most frightens me. It is an overwhelming passion that consumes me, and sometimes the line between my darkness and my passion are so blurred I can’t tell what side I am standing on.” She let her stare penetrate his eyes and touch that part of him that understood the seriousness of her words. “Believe me, Mycale, you don’t want this.”

  She touched his hand with the tip of her pointer finger, and he nearly jumped out of his skin. She smiled, understanding a bit better why he wanted to shut off his feelings. She had mistaken that constant metaphysical buzz just below the surface of his skin for nervousness or perhaps anxiousness, but it was neither. She said, “It took me a while to figure it out, why you enjoy touching me, but at the same time seem almost afraid to. For you, it is more than just being attracted to me.”

  Intrigued, he wanted to hear her theory. She continued, “This is just a theory, just me guessing and speaking metaphysically of course.”

  Mycale inclined his head.

  She continued, “You wish to learn how to turn yourself off because you feel everything, exponentially. Your feelings fill you up to the point where it’s hard to keep them all in. It’s like trying to contain rage. At first, I didn’t know what it was, but I feel it every time I touch you. A deep, burning rage constantly threatening to consume you. The dangers of this job help you control it. The adrenaline spikes help you expel some of it. When you touch me, I am like an outlet for you. Since I very often choose not to feel, you can expel your feelings, your rage into me without hurting me.”

  He diverted his eyes away from hers. She had no idea how close she had come to diagnosing his reality. Rage, like a malevolent lover, incessantly abused him, contaminating his mind and body like a drug. He needed to find peace, an emotion banished from him, and calm, a rare and hard-to-obtain necessity. Sori gave him both without even realizing it.

  Mycale wanted to tell her all of this, but he wasn’t ready to. He gave her the short version. He said, “Something bad happened to me when I was younger. It was so bad, rage consumed me and the only way to expel it is to hurt someone or myself. It’s the reason for all of my tattoos. I learned that my rage is something that will be with me for the rest of my life. You’re the only person that seems to understand me, although I don’t completely understand myself.”

  Realizing she had touched on a subject he wasn’t comfortable discussing, she hoped that he would someday share the burden he was carrying, but she had no intention of pressing him for the full story.

  She said, “I think it’s time for us to get a few hours of sleep.”

  * * *

  Over the course of the next few days, the Gonzaleses and the Hernandeses were inseparable. Sori and Mycale kept their code names although they were sure they didn’t need them anymore. Sophie and Michael Hernandez charmed Fredrick and Jeanine and it proved to be invaluable. They won the couple over and were rewarded with an invite to stay at the couple’s island home.

  Jeanine explained that they owned a home and property near the ship’s next stop: Turks and Caicos Islands. The couple usually cruised one-way and exited the ship when they were near their home. Sori and Mycale now understood why the couple chose cruising as their favorite vacation choice.

  Michael and Sophie happily accepted the couple’s invite. Fredrick insisted they relax at their home before they continued their dangerous journey. Fredrick assured them that the people chasing them would be unable to find them at their well-hidden island home. The team found this to be naive behavior on the part of the Gonzaleses. They knew first hand that if someone really wanted to find you, they would eventually.

  The invite was the perfect opportunity for the team to gather more intel and hopefully find tangible leads to Padre. With only days left of the cruise, they wondered if they were going to have to plan a torture session with the Gonzaleses to get viable intel out of them.

  Sori and Mycale were sure about one thing—Padre or the TC would eventually send more hired guns, no matter how well hidden the Gonzaleses thought their island home was. The team informed the cruise staff of their plans for departure, settled their ship accounts, and exited the ship with the Gonzaleses at Turks and Caicos Islands.

  CHAPTER 16

  The Perks in Life

  A white Lexus coupé awaited the Gonzaleses upon their arrival. Their driver, Bernard, greeted them as if he were family, hugging and kissing the couple. He was clearly an island native, tall, slender, and in his
mid-thirties with skin so dark it looked blue. He ensured the group were all seated and comfortable before loading the luggage. Fredrick sat in the front with Bernard, while Mycale sat in the back with the ladies.

  The short drive led them to a medium-sized boat that ushered them home. The Gonzaleses estate was located on a smaller island about twenty miles away from the main island. The estate sat on a small peninsula that contained acres of beautiful tropical trees and shrubs. Surrounded on three sides by the ocean, the house was a massive peach-colored three-story paradise.

  The house itself was over forty-thousand square feet of every amenity you could imagine with a twenty-eight-hundred-square-foot guesthouse for the staff. The rest of the estate showcased acres and acres of beautifully manicured land kissed by the ocean. A tennis court, a basketball court and a running track could be seen at a glance.

  The team was blown away by the massive size and amenities of the couple’s home. The estate was called Aspire.

  The Gonzaleses gave the team a grand tour and showed them to their bedroom, which was as large as an average-sized apartment. The team had been invited to stay for the duration of the Gonzaleses’ vacation, which was an entire month. They had no intentions of staying that long and weren’t sure if the Gonzaleses would be alive that long. However, they planned to stay for as long as it took to gain the intel and leads they were after.

  The Gonzaleses made them feel welcomed as they enjoyed dinner with the couple and talked as they watched sun sets together. Being waited on hand and foot made Mycale and Sori feel as if they were at some high-priced resort.

  Later that evening, the team retired to their magnificent accommodations, but sleep was the furthest thing from their minds. Ever the suspicious agents, Mycale and Sori had sniffed out three cameras so far. Trained to find and see things that most people would overlook, the team discovered that although they were likely being watched, there didn’t seem to be any audio. They spoke freely but always cautiously about plans of finding out and extracting information.