What He Explores (What He Wants, Book Twenty-One)

by Hannah Ford

  I took the train without any issue and then I caught a cab ride home. I really needed to stop taking cabs, it was going to destroy my already fragile bank account.

  I also needed to go into the restaurant for the night shift in a little while. My uncle had left a short voicemail telling me they expected me at seven o’clock. Like he was doing me a favor.

  Great, I thought. It would be such fun seeing my three ogre cousins, who no doubt would harass me worse than usual after everything that had gone on.

  It felt like a bad dream, where no matter what you did you could never get anywhere, never make headway.

  Every so often, I checked my phone for a text and my heart would sink a little when I realized that no text had come through.

  I imagined Zack out with his friends, talking over beer about their war stories, and the women would flock over to these brave, handsome men. Especially Zack.

  Lance was handsome, but Zack was a movie star.

  They would want Zack and he would be drunk, and he wouldn’t hesitate to take some hot bimbo into the bathroom and…

  I shook my head and tried to stop thinking, stop torturing myself with thoughts of the man who’d somehow stolen my heart. First, he’d gotten my body and then my heart had been his for the taking.

  But now what?

  Was it over as quickly as it had begun?

  As the hours ticked past, I tried to do other things. Rest, watch television, play games on my phone.

  Nothing worked. I was distracted.

  Eventually, I went and took a shower and then got ready for work.

  By the time I was dressed and ready to leave, my phone was still silent. Nobody had called or texted.

  And then I heard a horn honking outside my apartment. My heart started to race so fast, I felt like it was going to beat right out of my chest. Smiling wider than I’d ever smiled, I ran to the window and looked down.

  Immediately, the smile disappeared from my face.

  It was my father’s car out there.

  Oh my God.

  I felt a wave of nausea at the thought of having to see my Dad at this moment after I’d just been so gravely disappointed.

  He honked again, and I yelled out loud at nobody in particular. “Oh, just shut up!”

  And then I grabbed my coat and purse and headed out the door.

  When I got outside, my father had his window rolled down. He was grinning at me like the cat that ate the canary. “There’s my little girl,” he said.

  “What are you doing here?” I asked, not smiling back at him.

  “I was on my way to Home Depot and I thought I’d swing by.” His eyes shifted uncomfortably. “Just see how you’re doing.”

  I shouldered my purse. “You wanted to check on me and make sure I was going into work.”

  He scratched his jaw and smiled again. “I was on my way to Home Depot, Caeli. It’s five minutes from here—“

  “Well, as you can see, I’m all dressed and about to head out. Anything else you want to check in on?”

  He sighed deeply. “Look, I know that you feel…you feel that I’ve pushed you to take on responsibilities….and maybe you have a point. But I never intended to make life hard for you.”

  For a moment, I almost felt sorry for him.

  But then I remembered that I was the one who still had to go and work at a place I hated, with people I despised, and all because my parents had so badly mismanaged their finances and lives that they needed me to bail them out.

  I wasn’t going to just tell my father all was forgiven, especially not when he was still trying to manipulate me into doing more work for him.

  “When’s it going to be my turn to screw up a little?” I asked, finally. “When do I get to live my life for a change?”

  He opened his mouth but no words came out. He stared over my shoulder, his eyes hardening and his mouth shutting closed.

  I turned around and saw Zack standing there, hands stuffed in his jacket pockets a few feet away from me. He gave a slight smile. “It took me and the boys awhile to catch up. I should’ve texted or called sooner, but I wanted to surprise you.”

  “Mission accomplished,” I replied.

  Now my heart really was pounding.

  Zack walked forward, eyes focused on me. He drew close and then his hands reached out and grabbed mine. “Why are you dressed in that outfit?” he said.

  “I have work. I’m running late now, actually.”

  I heard the car door slam and then looked and saw my father getting out and coming towards us.

  Zack seemed relaxed as he watched my father coming over.

  “What’s going on here?” Dad asked him.

  “What does it look like?” Zack responded simply.

  “It looks like some punk with a shitty attitude and no respect thinks he can swagger in and pretend to be the big man. But you’re not going to corrupt my little girl—“

  “I’m not your little girl,” I said.

  My father ignored me and stared at Zack. “I let you slide once, mister, but not again. I know you’re the guy who assaulted my nephews. I could make a call right now and you’ll be arrested before you can so much as cough in her direction.”

  Zack smiled. “You’d do that?”

  My father nodded, his eyes burning with fury. “She’s got a job to get to, son. And why don’t you take yourself on down the road and move on to the next piece of tail.”

  “Piece of tail?” I said, disgusted. “What is wrong with you, Dad?”

  “Let us talk,” my father said to me.

  Zack was still calm, not having moved from where he stood. His body felt hard and strong and warm beside me. “I’ve already said my piece. If you want to call the police, go on and do it.”

  “Okay,” Dad said, pulling out his phone.

  “If you do that, I swear you’ll never see or speak to me again,” I said. In that moment, I’d never been more sure of something in my life.

  My father held the phone to his ear.

  I continued talking to him. “Say one word into that phone, and I will forget I ever knew you,” told him. “That’s a fact.”

  He opened his mouth and then, seeming to think better of it, hung up the phone. “Fine,” he said, and then turned his attention back to Zack. “But she has to go to work now.”

  “No,” Zack said, shaking his head firmly.

  “No?” my father scoffed. “Some people have actual jobs, son.”

  “She’s not working at a place like that,” Zack told him. “Caeli deserves better.”

  “Oh, and I suppose you’re better? What the hell can you do for her?”

  Zack’s chest expanded and his chin lifted as his eyes hardened. “I am better,” he said. “I didn’t know that before I met your daughter, but I know it now. She’s the best person I’ve ever met and there’s no way in hell she goes back to work for people that scream at her and treat her badly. Not on my watch. Sir.”

  My father looked bewildered. “Who the fuck is this guy?” he said.

  “He’s a marine who received The Distinguished Service Cross for valor in battle,” I said. “So maybe you should show him a little respect.”

  “That’s got nothing to do with it,” Zack said.

  “Yes, it does,” I told him, grabbing his arm tightly. “You’re a hero and he needs to know that.”

  “A hero, huh?” my father said, looking even more perplexed now.

  “I’m just a guy who loves your daughter, Sir.”

  My father looked almost as shocked as I felt.

  Love?

  Did he just say love?

  I felt my face break into a smile as I turned and looked up at him. “I love you too,” I said, my heart filling up so much that it was bound to break.

  And then he was leaning in and kissing me. His lips burned with the fire and passion that we’d had since the first moment I met him.

  But now the passion and fire was controlled.

  I let him light me up a
nd forgot everything else.

  EPILOGUE

  ZACK

  I’d been staring at the computer screen on my Mac laptop for hours.

  This was all part of the new routine over the last six months.

  Up at four am, go for a three-mile run around the neighborhood, and then inside to brew coffee and shower. Out of the shower, change, grab my coffee and head into the office to work on my book.

  This was different than knocking motherfuckers out for a living.

  Caeli liked that it was different, and so did I. Mostly.

  I rubbed my eyes and looked away from the screen momentarily. I’d been reliving Afghanistan for six months and it never got any easier, but in some ways the harder it got to write—the better I felt in the rest of my life.

  Shit, the rest of my life couldn’t have been going any better.

  It felt like a fucking dream. But I wasn’t stupid enough to take any of it for granted. Especially not her.

  Speaking of—I rose from my chair and went to the kitchen, put an English muffin in the toaster and poured a big mug of coffee. A light splash of cream and one Splenda.

  The English muffin popped up, I buttered it and then added a little grape jelly, licking my fingers.

  I grabbed the plate and the mug and went slowly into the master bedroom.

  She was lying in bed on her side, looking as beautiful as ever. I felt my eyes mist up a little and had to laugh at myself.

  I’d gotten soft.

  But I knew if anyone ever fucked with my girl, they’d find out just how hard I still was underneath it all.

  “Baby,” I called out, walking closer to the bed and then setting the food and coffee down on the nightstand. “Baby,” I repeated, just a little louder.

  She groaned and made a scowl, which was cute as hell even if she didn’t know it.

  Finally, her eyes cracked open into slits. “What time….?” She moaned.

  “Same time as always. Seven thirty.”

  Now that she was in school full-time, she didn’t have to get up that early. Her first class usually didn’t start until 9 or 10 most days.

  Caeli finally looked at me, breaking into an unrestrained smile. “You brought me breakfast, honey.”

  “I always bring you breakfast.”

  She snorted, sliding up to a sitting position and grabbing the plate. “But I make you lunch and dinner,” she reminded me.

  It was true. And she was a damn good cook too. Best food I ever tasted.

  Best everything I ever tasted.

  “I need to get back to work,” I told her.

  She shook her head and reached for my hand. “I need you here with me.”

  “Babe, I have to hit my word count. I’ve got pages due to my editor at the end of the week.”

  “Oh,” she said, her eyes widening. “Don’t forget, your suit’s back from the dry cleaners and hanging downstairs.”

  “Yeah, I remember,” I grumbled, squeezing her hand. “This party’s not necessary, though. You know I don’t do formal.”

  “Honey,” she said, sighing. “We’re going to celebrate your big movie deal. It’s in every paper. Our family and friends want to be a part of it.”

  “Right. Right.” I grinned, even though when I thought about all of those people at the restaurant staring at me and expecting me to make some big speech, it made me a little sick. “Back to work,” I told her, drifting away as she finished her coffee and muffin in bed.

  The part tonight was supposed to be a big deal on my account. But I didn’t want the attention.

  Still, if it reminded people of what my friends’ sacrificed over in Kabul, than it was worth it perhaps.

  Not to mention, I had other plans that would make the party tonight much more useful than it had been previously.

  It all still felt surreal.

  A book deal and then a movie deal followed right on its heels. Somehow it didn’t seem right, but I wasn’t going to turn it all down.

  And I sure as hell didn’t mind the money. Seven figures and more to come. Enough to more than start the life and the family that I wanted to build with the woman I loved more than anything else in the world.

  I went out to my study and got back to work.

  Losing track of time, I had my headphones in and didn’t hear anyone coming into the room until I felt her hands on my chest.

  I turned around in my chair and then she was smiling, wearing absolutely nothing, as she got down on her knees.

  I took out my headphones. “What’s all this?”

  “I’m still hungry, turns out,” she said, sliding my pants down and putting her wet, warm mouth on my suddenly stiffened cock.

  “Holy fuck,” I groaned, grabbing the arm rests on my chair.

  She slid her mouth up and down on my shaft, then gripped it and stroked and stroked. I could probably have busted a nut right there and then, it felt so good.

  She deep throated my cock and let me fuck her mouth just the way I liked.

  And then I was out of my mind with the wanting of her. She was buck naked, her flesh ripe and willing, ready for the taking.

  So I took her, fucking her from behind, her hands splayed out on the desk while I pounded her.

  She came hard on my dick, her tight pussy making my cock so wet that I could hardly stand it. I grabbed her close and then withdrew.

  “Get on the desk,” I said, clearing a space.

  She climbed onto it, lying on her back, and wrapped her legs around me as I slid into her.

  We both moaned, and then I slowly pumped my hips, our eyes meeting.

  We were fucking, but it wasn’t just sex.

  No.

  It hadn’t ever been just sex with us.

  “God, you feel good,” I told her.

  Everything about her felt better than good.

  I stroked into her, slowly, and it was building between us, as she pushed her hips up greedily, wanting me deeper, and I went deeper.

  And then we were both coming together, and I pushed all the way in and leaned down onto her, my lips on her ear. “I love you baby,” I said.

  “Oh, I love you too, Zack,” she said, gripping me.

  When we were done, we both went to shower together, and we stood under the hot water, and she shampooed my hair and then I did hers, but she complained that I was making her hair too sudsy.

  Okay, the truth was, I liked to make her hair crazy soapy. It cracked me up.

  I got hard again, but if we fucked every time she made me hard, we’d never have left the house.

  Which, truth be told, would’ve been fine with me.

  Out of the shower, I dried off and got changed while she was still freshening up in the bathroom.

  While she was in there, I went into the closet and pulled out my old sneakers that she didn’t like to touch. I dug inside and found the small velvet box that had been stashed there for the last few weeks.

  So many times I’d wanted to just spring it on her, but I knew I had to wait for this day.

  If there was one good thing about tonight’s party, it was that all of our friends and family would be present—including her Dad, who it turned out actually loved me. The guy wanted to hang out with me so much it was almost becoming a problem.

  But I liked him too. Funny how things worked out sometimes.

  And now my parents and siblings would be around too, and they’d get to see me have the biggest and proudest moment of my life.

  I opened the box and looked at the gleaming diamond ring contained within it.

  That ring symbolized so much.

  It was everything I wanted to tell Caeli, to show her. To let her know that my love for her was like that rock—that diamond—completely unshakable and unbreakable.

  And to announce it in front of everyone we knew and cared about. To let them know that whatever else I’d been in the past—I was now the kind of man that could make Caeli Powers happy.

  And that beat everything.

  That was eve
rything.

  I closed the ring box and stowed it away again.

  Caeli was coming out of the bathroom.

  It was time to go and spend the rest of my life with the woman I loved.

  THE END OF OBSCENE

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