by Beth Rinyu
“Do you want me to go with you to talk to Mrs. Bradley,” Donna asked sympathetically.
I could feel my eyes burning with tears. “No, just go get in line. I’ll be fine.” She rubbed her hand up and down my arm in support as she headed down the bleachers. I truly didn’t know what I would have done without Donna over these past few weeks. She was the greatest friend anyone could ask for. She rubbed a lot of people the wrong way because she was very headstrong and not afraid to speak her mind. She didn’t take any nonsense from anyone and I loved her for that. I slowly made my way down the bleachers, trying not to be too obvious.
“Nicole, come and get in line!” I looked over to see Rachel Wiser staring at me and waving me over to get in line. Rachel and I were not friends by any means. She had dated Jonathan before me and when he broke up with her, she swore it was my fault. Then, my being chosen over her as captain of the cheerleading squad only added to her fury. She and Jonathan were together for almost a year before they broke up, which had nothing to do with me. She was super close with Jonathan’s parents and made it very difficult for me when I first started going out with him. She was now dating another football player and was trying to act as if she was over the whole Jonathan thing by befriending me, but I knew it wasn’t sincere.
“Umm, I have to go to the bathroom first,” I said.
She raised her eyebrows and I could feel her piercing eyes burning into my back as I walked out of the gym. I was finally able to locate Mrs. Bradley in the hallway and anxiously waited for her to finish up her conversation with the gym teacher. “Mrs. Bradley, can I talk to you for a minute?”
“Sure, Nicole.”
“In private,” I said.
“Sure.” We walked down the hall and into her office. She closed the door behind her. “What’s up, Nicole?”
“I can’t get that shot. I’m pregnant,” I blurted out, feeling a little relief knowing that someone else knew now.
“Oh, Nicole.” She looked at me in shock. “Are you sure?” I nodded as the tears rolled down my face. “Have you been to see a doctor yet, honey?”
I shook my head. “No. I haven’t told my parents yet.”
“Nicole, it’s very important that you go see a doctor, sweetie. Have you told the other person responsible for this?” she asked.
I nodded and began to cry harder. “Yes and he doesn’t want anything to do with it. He swears that it’s not his. It was my first time, Mrs. Bradley. I didn’t even want to do it.” She hugged me tightly as I began to sob. She rubbed my back to console me.
“Nicole, you have to tell your parents, sweetie. This is too much for you to take on by yourself.”
My stomach churned just thinking about it. “They will kill me.”
“Nicole, I’m sure they’ll be upset, but you need a support system. You need to talk to the guidance counselor right away, so you can discuss the options that you have.”
I shook my head. “I’m not having an abortion.” I was adamant.
“Okay, but there are still so many options for you. She’ll also work out a plan so you can finish up school and still graduate with your class in June. The main thing right now is that you get to a doctor and get prenatal care. “Do you know how far along you are?” she asked.
“Eight weeks.”
She looked down at the calendar on her desk and flipped through the pages. “Okay, that puts your due date near the end of May. So if you can make it up until April, then I’m sure that the school can arrange a private tutor for you to finish up the rest of the school year at home.” She wrapped her arm around me and walked me down to the guidance counselor, just as Rachel Wiser was walking out of the gym, grasping onto her arm where she had just gotten her shot. She stared into my tear-filled eyes, giving me a devious grin as she looked at Mrs. Bradley. I knew from that moment on, that my hell on earth was about to begin.
Chapter 6
Nicole
I was surprised to see my dad’s car in my driveway. My mom and dad had moved back to our hometown permanently a year and a half ago. It was a great help to me. My mother watched Ella for me every day while I was at work. My parents and I didn’t have the greatest relationship for the longest time, but over the past few years, we had mended our wounds and our relationship was the best that it had ever been. They doted on Ryan and Ella constantly. My father was especially close with Ryan and I knew it had to do a lot with the way he had treated me over the years regarding the situation. I buried the past behind me and was just happy to have my parents back in my life without any more tension between us. I had a great support system in addition to my parents; Dailan’s father and stepmother were always there to help out as well. And Dailan – well, he was the best husband I could have ever asked for. If someone had told me that a few years ago, when that wise cracking, chauvinistic, hot Irish guy first walked into my classroom, I would have never believed it. He loved Ryan and Ella so much and he always made sure he let me know how much he loved me too.
I walked inside to find my mother folding a load of laundry. She immediately grabbed Ella from my arms and smothered her in kisses. “There’s Mom-Mom’s baby,” she said. Ella’s smile widened as she attempted to kiss my mom back the best way she knew how.
“What are you guys doing here?” I asked.
“Your father wanted to fix that overhead light that’s not working out on your deck.”
“Oh, he didn’t have to do that. Dailan was going to call an electrician.”
“Nicole, don’t be silly. Why would you guys pay someone to do that when your father can fix it? It gives him something to do besides driving me crazy! Where’s Ryan?” she asked.
“He’s at the batting cages with Dailan.”
“Oh, Dailan finally took a day off from work?”
“Yeah, but he ended up getting called in for a couple of hours.”
My mom shook her head. “Well, he should have just told them no. He works way too hard.”
“Yeah, he does.” I said, still unable to get the visual of Rachel holding my baby out of my head. I walked over to the counter and began to prepare Ella’s lunch while my mother seated her in her high chair. She began to bang on the tray and babble. “Okay, piggy, I’m moving as fast I can.” I couldn’t resist giving her a kiss on the cheek, smelling the strong scent of a very familiar perfume on her that wasn’t mine. I cringed.
I handed my mom the bowl of Ella’s baby food and a yogurt as she sat down and began to feed her. Ella couldn’t get it into her mouth fast enough. “This child loves to eat!” my mother said.
“Yes she does.” I laughed. I was still stewing over what had happened earlier and felt the need to talk to someone who understood where I was coming from. “Hey, Mom, you’ll never believe who Dailan’s new assistant is.”
“Who?” she asked, half paying attention as she laughed at Ella shoveling the food into her mouth.
“Rachel Wiser.”
She put the spoon into the bowl and placed it down on Ella’s tray. She turned around, giving me her full attention. “Oh no, Nicole.”
“Yeah, tell me about it, and could you just imagine how I felt when I walked in and saw her holding Ella?”
“What was that little witch doing holding my baby girl?” my mother asked, giving Ella a spoonful of yogurt.
“Well, I was getting around to using my Mother’s Day present when Dailan texted me to tell me that he had to run into work. I went to go pick up the kids from his office. Dailan had a conference call, so Debbie and Rachel were watching Ryan and Ella.”
“Why didn’t Dailan just call me? I would have come over and watched them?”
“My thoughts exactly, Mom! But he’s a man and men don’t think.”
I told my mom everything that happened during my encounter with Rachel. My mother listened and seemed just as sickened by it as I was. “Did you tell Dailan who she was?”
“I told him a little, but, believe me, when he gets home, he’s going to get an earful!”
&n
bsp; “Well, I want to take both Ryan and Ella overnight for you next weekend. You and Dailan deserve some alone time together. You’ve both been working so hard and it’s very easy to lose that spark when you’re busy taking care of little ones.” She seemed like she was speaking from experience, but I didn’t dare ask.
“Hey, thanks!” As much as I loved Ryan and Ella, the thought of having some uninterrupted alone time with my incredibly sexy husband made me smile.
“Don’t tell Ryan, but your dad has tickets to a baseball game. He’s going to surprise him.”
I smiled as I thought about how close my dad and Ryan had become. It was as if Ryan was a clone of my brother when he was his age. The similarities between the two were almost scary.
“Hey, Dad!” I said as he entered the kitchen.
He gave me a kiss and leaned down to kiss Ella as she held her arms up to be taken from her high chair. My mom removed her from her high chair and my dad took her in his arms and kissed her. “She loves her Pop-Pop,” my mom said.
“And her Pop-Pop loves her,” my dad said, giving Ella a kiss on the forehead. “Where’s Ryan?” my dad asked.
“He and Dailan are at the batting cages.”
“Did he tell you about the game he pitched the other night? That kid has some arm,” my dad said proudly.
“Yes, I heard, and it figures of all the nights that I had to miss his game!” Normally, I made a point of never missing one of Ryan’s baseball games and the one night that I had parent/teacher conferences was the night that he pitched a great game.
“Are you ready to get going, Tre?” my dad asked.
“I’m never ready to leave my baby girl,” my mom said as she squeezed Ella tightly. “Nicole, did you need me to bring anything else over for Ryan’s party tomorrow?”
“Nope, I’m good. I just have to pick up the cake in the morning.”
“Well, you know your sister is coming without the kids.”
“Oh, why is that?”
“It’s Mark’s weekend and he won’t bend and let her have them.” It had been six months and I still could not believe that my sister and her husband were separated. Her perfect world and her perfect marriage had finally come crumbling down when she found out that he was cheating on her for the past year with a co-worker. I tried to be as sympathetic as I could to her, but she and I still did not mesh well. She had warmed up to me a bit since I had the baby and found out about Ryan, but she was still the same self-centered Renee that she had always been. She and her husband were in an ugly custody battle and I was so thankful that Dailan’s specialty was not in family law. But that still didn’t stop her from calling him at least once a week for legal advice.
I walked my mom and dad to the door and we said our goodbyes. I came back into the kitchen and looked at the clock. It was only 12:30, a little too early to put Ella down for a nap so I could get some stuff done. I decided we would hit the grocery store so I could get some last minute things for Ryan’s party. I gave her a quick diaper change, grabbed the diaper bag and my purse, and we headed out the door. The normal five-minute ride to the food store took twenty with all of the Memorial Day traffic headed to the beach.
We arrived at the food store. I ran down each aisle, throwing all of the last minute items into my shopping cart, while Ella babbled and got the attention of everyone we passed. The afternoon heat hit me in the face as we walked out of the store. I placed Ella's sun hat on her head, turned on the car, and got the air conditioner started before placing Ella in her car seat. I made a detour and pulled into the cemetery. I had bought a beautiful bouquet of red, white, and blue flowers while food shopping to place at my brother's grave. Normally, I would only come here alone to have long deep conversations with him, but today, I wanted Ella finally to meet her uncle.
I sighed as we pulled up to the familiar spot. Two years after and it was still so hard. I missed him so much. I took Ella out of her car seat, grabbed the flowers, and walked up the hill to my brother's grave. I greeted him the usual way; a kiss to the back of my hand and then a touch of his tombstone. I placed the flowers on the ground in front of his tombstone. "Hey, Justin, I thought it was time that you met your niece.” I bent down to the ground and placed Ella on my knee.
"Blow kisses to Uncle Justin, Ella.” A smile stretched across her face as she excitedly began to rock back and forth. She placed her hand in her mouth and then waved it in the air, just as a warm breeze began to rustle the leaves on the tree overhead. My eyes began to fill with tears. Justin was there...I knew it.
Chapter 7
Nicole
The past…
The school day was over and I had assured the guidance counselor that I would tell my parents about the pregnancy. I just wasn’t sure how I was going to do it. I knew that the longer I waited, the angrier they would get. I was headed to cheerleading practice, trying my best to act as if everything was normal. Mrs. Finley, the cheerleading coach, was working on the pyramid that we would be doing in competition. “I think Nicole should be the flyer. She’s the tiniest and she’s the best at it,” Rachel spoke up, giving me a quick smile.
“Nicole, do you want to be the flyer?” Mrs. Finley asked.
I didn’t know how to answer. I never had a problem with it before, so I didn’t want to look suspicious by saying no now. “I guess,” I said hesitantly.
Donna was shaking her head as she pulled me off to the side. “Nicole, don’t! If you fall, you can get really hurt,” she whispered.
“I’ll be okay.”
“Nicole!” I ignored her and walked away as Mrs. Finley began to explain the setup. I nervously climbed my way to the top on shaking legs. Donna was gripping tightly to one foot, while Rachel had the other. I was just about to dismount when Rachel let go of my foot, causing me to fall flat on my back.
“Oops, sorry!” she said with a sarcastic grin. “Hope you didn’t hurt the baby.” The other girls looked on with concern while a few of Rachel’s cronies laughed along with her.
“What did you just say, Miss Wiser?” Mrs. Finley asked, not sounding pleased at all.
“Nothing,” Rachel smirked, getting a few more giggles from her friends.
“Nicole, are you okay?’ Mrs. Finley said as she and Donna helped me up.
“Um, yeah.” I could feel my face turning red as I fought to hold back the tears.
I watched as Donna’s anger grew. She made sure I was okay before she charged at Rachel, pushing her to the ground. “What the hell is wrong with you? You freakin’ bitch!” Donna shouted.
“Donna!” Mrs. Finley screamed in an effort to break them up.
“That’s okay, Mrs. Finley. Donna, why don’t you tell everyone why you’re so upset that Nicole fell?” Rachel asked. Donna looked at her with fire in her eyes. “Oh, okay, I will, then. Everybody, Nicole is pregnant!” Rachel shouted.
The gasps of fifteen teenage girls filled the gym as tears rolled down my face. “Rachel, that’s enough!” Mrs. Finley shouted. “That’s it for today, girls.” She signaled for me to stay behind, waiting for Rachel and her girlfriends to exit the gym. Donna held my hand and sat down on the bleachers with me. “Nicole, is that true?” Mrs. Finley asked gently. I nodded. She rubbed my back to try and comfort me, but nothing was helping. I was humiliated beyond words. I knew by tomorrow that the entire school was going to know. “Nicole, you fell pretty hard. I think you better get checked out.”
“No-no, it’s okay. I’ll be fine.”
“Well, I hate to do this, but I don’t want you cheerleading until you have a doctor’s note saying it’s okay.”
“It’s okay, Mrs. Finley, because I quit. I should have never tried doing that today.” I began to sob as Donna pulled me close and hugged me.
“Nicole, have you talked to anyone yet?” Mrs. Finley asked.
“Yes, I talked with the guidance counselor today. I know what I have to do.”
She gave me a sympathetic smile and placed her hand on my shoulder. “Nicole, if you need to t
alk, I’m here.” She looked at me one last time and gave Donna a smile before walking away.
“I am going to kick that bitch’s fuckin’ ass!” Donna shouted.
“Donna, don’t. She’s not worth getting in trouble over.”
“Are you sure you’re okay?”
“I’m positive. I don’t know how I’m going to be after I tell my parents tonight, though.”
“Do you want me to come over?”
“Nah. No sense in you having to listen to it too.”
“Oh, Nicole, it’s gonna be okay, I promise,” she said as she hugged me tightly.
I changed into my sweats and walked out into the chilly October air, waiting for my brother to get done with his football game. I sat on the bleachers, trying to forget about what I needed to do tonight. I was in such a trance, that I didn’t even hear Justin coming up the bleachers. “Nicole, is it true? Are you really pregnant?” I bit my lip and looked down before nodding. “Nicole, Mom and Dad are going to freak!”
“I know.” I couldn’t hold back the tears any longer. Justin wrapped his arms around me and hugged me tightly.
“When are you going to tell them?”
“Tonight.”
“Nicole, I’m scared for you.”
“Me too.” Justin and I both knew my dad’s temper all too well. “I’m going to tell them after dinner, so you may want to make yourself scarce.”
“I’m not going to leave you.”
I began to cry even harder.
“I love you, Justin.”
“I love you too.”
I had a sick feeling in my stomach when we pulled up to my house and I saw my dad’s truck in the driveway. He was never home this early. I took a deep breath as we entered the front door. “Nicole, get the hell in here,” I heard my dad shout from the living room. My stomach dropped as I slowly made my way in with Justin following close behind. I looked over at my mother. I could tell she had been crying and I knew right away that they knew.