Hypocritically Yours: A Standalone Age-Gap Romance

by Hayley Faiman

  “Tennessee has zero business wanting anything to do with me, and I have none wanting anything to do with her. The fact is, we’ve fallen for one another. I care for her deeply. I care for her son as well. I am ready to start the second half of my life,” I say.

  “I never thought that the second half of my life would include a young family, but it very much does. I know that it’s hard to believe, but I wish that you would all try to get to know her before you pass serious judgment.”

  I’m met with silence, and before any of them can speak, I hear a soft knock on the closed door to the room.

  “Mr. Astor, your other guests have arrived,” the hostess calls out.

  Flicking my gaze to my children before I stand, I hope that my message is clear with them. They’re all adults and I expect them to act accordingly, whether they choose to or not is completely up to them at this point.

  The door opens and I make my way toward them. Tennessee and Holden walk in, hand-in-hand. I can tell that she’s extremely nervous, she’s trembling as she walks toward me. She’s wearing a solid black dress that flows and hits her at her knees and a pair of her mother’s loud heels, at least that’s how she describes them.

  Sliding my hand around her back, and squeezing her waist, I dip my chin and touch my lips to the corner of hers.

  “Hey, honey,” I murmur just loud enough for her to hear.

  “Anry,” Holden whisper-shouts, interrupting us.

  Chuckling, I take a step back and look down at the little blond-haired boy. “Holden,” I say with a smile.

  He’s got his head tilted all the way backward, his eyes squinting as he looks up at me. “Cancakes?”

  “Holden,” Tennessee begins.

  Crouching down, I look into his eyes. “You’d like pancakes, for dinner?” I ask.

  He looks to the table of people, all three of my children are watching us, and I’m not sure of the expressions they’re wearing, but Holden seems completely unbothered.

  “Lub cancakes,” he announces.

  Standing, I smile as I look at Tennessee one last time before I guide them both over to the table. I pull out a chair for Holden next to her, then a chair for her next to me. As much as I wouldn’t mind Holden sitting between us, that would probably be far too much for my children.

  “Everyone, this is Tennessee,” I introduce.

  Laurent smiles, thinking this is all hilarious and I want nothing more than to smack him upside the head. We take our seats, the waitress arrives and takes drink and food orders, then we stare at one another in silence.

  As much as I don’t want this to be a clusterfuck, I’m pretty sure it is and there’s no way to make it anything else but just that.

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  TENNESSEE

  Uncomfortable. Awkward. Trembling. All words that I’m feeling in this exact moment. Thankfully, Holden doesn’t quite read the room the same way that I do. He’s shifting from side to side in his seat, singing a song to himself.

  “So, I thought I told you to stay away,” Lucinda sneers.

  Landry growls next to me, but I reach over and wrap my fingers around his thigh, squeezing him gently. I need to stand up for myself, if I don’t, then they will never understand how much I truly care for their father.

  “I have very deep feelings for your father, and I’m sorry, but nothing could keep me away.”

  “Are they about three and a half inches deep and two inches wide, in the shape of a rectangle?” she asks, being a smartass.

  Ignoring her words, I shake my head once, licking my lips before I lift my gaze to hers. “I know it must be shocking. Seeing me sitting here, when it wasn’t long ago you all three approached me in his office, at my desk. However, this isn’t brand new, it’s a few months in the making.”

  “Practically ancient,” Lucinda drawls.

  I hum. Ignoring her yet again. “I just want to say something, and then I’ll drop it. I know that you don’t trust me right now, that’s okay because I’ll be here long enough that you’ll have time.”

  It must be the right thing to say, because Lucinda gives me a funny look, she shifts her gaze to her phone and starts to focus on that. It’s rude, but I figure she’s hurting. Even if Landry and Susan have been separated for years, this is still something new for them and it’s going to take some adjusting.

  “What are your plans, for the future, that is?” Lawrence asks.

  Landry clears his throat. “Not the place,” he growls.

  Shaking my head, I turn to look at Landry and give him a warm smile. “It’s okay, I’d like for us to at least be friendly, if nothing else.”

  Shifting my gaze back to Lawrence, I continue to wear my same smile and I explain to him that I graduated with a degree in finance and that I would love to work in the office in a different capacity one day, but that I’m grateful for the opportunity just to work in the building at this point.

  “What is your endgame?” Lucinda asks.

  As soon as she makes it, I don’t break eye contact with her. She wants the truth, she wants transparency, she wants to make me squirm. The funny thing is, she doesn’t scare me and she sure as hell doesn’t intimidate me.

  “The only thing I’ve ever wanted was to be able to provide for my son. I chose Landry’s company because of the perks. The in-building childcare was the biggest selling point. The benefits that Landry provides to all of his employees are unmatchable anywhere else. It’s really the only place I wanted to work.”

  “Now that you’re in, what do you want? If you think my father is going to give you any part of his company, you’ve made a grave mistake,” Laurent announces, for the first time he seems standoffish toward me and a bit hostile.

  I gasp from his words. Turning my head slightly, I look over to Landry who is staring at Laurent with angry narrowed eyes. “You haven’t told them?” I breathe.

  “No,” Landry grinds out.

  “I can’t believe you haven’t said anything,” I mutter.

  “What the fuck is going on here?” Laurent shouts.

  I jump, looking down at Holden, who looks up at me at the exact same time. He is reading the room now and his eyes are watering as he’s on the verge of tears. Standing, I turn to him and scoop him up in my arms.

  Looking back over my shoulder, I give Landry a smile. “I’m just going to take him to the bathroom,” I lie.

  Leaving the room, I don’t give Landry or anyone else an opportunity to stop me. Thankfully, Holden doesn’t cry, but I still take him into the women’s restroom with me. I’m thankful, when I slip inside, that there is a lounge.

  Sitting down on the fancy sofa, I watch Holden walk around the room. He finds a mirror and he starts making silly faces at himself before he begins to laugh and giggle. I watch him, my own mood lifting almost immediately.

  I don’t look up when the door opens, assuming it’s just a woman heading into the bathroom, but when the sofa sinks down next to me, I turn my head and I’m surprised to see it’s Lucinda sitting next to me.

  “I really want to hate you,” she begins.

  Licking my lips, I shift my attention back to Holden, who is still cracking himself up at his own reflection in the mirror.

  “Do you?” I ask.

  She hums, but is quiet for another long moment before she begins to speak again. “You have a backbone. I like that. I’m still a way bigger bitch, just saying.”

  “But?”

  Lucinda laughs softly. “I told my dad weeks ago that I would support any choice that he made when it came to women and life, until after I met the person.”

  Tilting my head slightly, my gaze flicks to her, then back to Holden. “Are you going to keep me in suspense?” I ask.

  “I’m not one hundred percent sold on the two of you together. It’s really fucking icky. But, if you want an old man and you’re good to him, I can’t put a wedge between you, not yet.”

  Holden stands, obviously over looking at his reflection and makes his way over
to me. Without hesitation, I pick him up in my arms and place him across my lap, then turn to look over to her. She’s watching us, no, it’s more than simply watching. She’s observing us.

  “I really care for Landry, Lucinda. I was content being alone. I never planned on dating anyone. I turned Laurent down because I didn’t want to date. I haven’t dated since I found out that I was pregnant with Holden. I’ve focused on school and him, nothing else.”

  She presses her lips together, not speaking right away. I wait, wondering what she’s going to say, if anything. Then she surprises me.

  “You haven’t dated, at all?”

  Shaking my head, I close my eyes for a moment, then reopen them. “I tried to resist him, just as much as he tried to resist me. I know that the divorce isn’t final and it makes me sick to think of him as still married. I am so sorry that I’ve upset you and your brothers. I never wanted to, not ever.”

  There is a moment of silence, then causing me to jump, Lucinda bursts out into laughter. She shakes her head, wiping the tears from her eyes as she attempts to calm down her breathing. When she finally does, she giggles again.

  “We don’t care about that. Our mother has been cheating on him for years. I don’t pretend to know the ins and outs of their marriage, but I do know that it hasn’t been a true marriage for years. When he said he wanted to start dating a few weeks ago, I was excited. That is, until I realized he meant dating a girl younger than me and now, moving in together?”

  My lips turn up into a small smile. “Sorry to surprise you like that. It just…”

  “Happened?” she asks, arching a brow.

  A laugh escapes my mouth. “Yeah.”

  “Seems a lot between you two just happens.”

  “Have you ever felt unable to control your own body around someone? Like you’re trying to hold yourself back, but then something else takes over and you’re doing things, in places, that you would never ever have imagined?”

  Lucinda leans forward, wrinkling her nose. “That, I don’t want to ever hear about.”

  My shoulders shake as I try to hold back my laughter, but I can’t. Together we find ourselves in a fit of giggles and that’s when Holden joins in, a few moments later the door opens and Landry finds us giggling like real girlfriends.

  LANDRY

  As much as I want to call the evening a total fucking waste and not a success, there were a few bright spots. Like when I walked into the women’s lounge and saw my two girls and Holden giggling together.

  However, that was the only happy part of the entire dinner. Once the cat was out of the bag that I’d given Susan my company, Laurent was furious with me and Lawrence wasn’t much happier.

  Thankfully, Tennessee picked out a bed for the master bedroom and she promised to stay the night with me. Holden will be in his new room, and we will be two doors down from him.

  She was worried about him and the stairs, so I installed a gate so that he couldn’t get down if he woke up before us. I know something though, she says it all of the time, but she’s not thinking about it right now.

  Holden always, always, gets in bed with her when he’s trying to wake up in the mornings. They cuddle for a few minutes up to an hour before they start their day, so he probably won’t ever even venture to the staircase without one of us.

  Pulling into the garage, I look over at her and notice that she’s staring out the window. “You okay, honey?” I ask.

  Slowly, she turns her head, her gaze shifting over to meet mine. She gives me a small, sad, smile. “They’re really upset that you’ve given it to Susan. Really upset. If I would have known, I wouldn’t have said anything.”

  Shaking my head, my lips twitch into a small smile. “Honey, they were going to find out eventually. I just can’t tell them the rest of my plan, yet.”

  “You don’t want it to get to Susan,” I say, guessing.

  “Thirty-one days,” I rasp.

  “Thirty-one days,” she says, nodding her head in agreement.

  Lifting my hand, I cup her cheek, my thumb sliding across her smooth skin. “Let’s go to bed,” I murmur. “First night in our new bed,” I say with a grin.

  “I’m not officially moved in and I never really did answer you.”

  I let out a chuckle, careful not to be too loud. Holden is dozing off in the back seat and I don’t want to upset him and startle him. “You’re moving in, honey. You wouldn’t deny me that.”

  “I wouldn’t?” she asks.

  Shaking my head slowly, I keep my eyes focused on her gorgeous green gaze. “No, you wouldn’t,” I murmur. “You wouldn’t because you know that I’ve waited my whole life for you. For this moment.”

  She looks haunted for a moment, then lifts her hand and wraps her fingers around my wrist. She opens her mouth as if she’s about to say something, then snaps her lips closed and presses them together.

  “Okay. We’ll move in with you,” she eventually whispers.

  “There’s more to what you’re not saying, honey.”

  She shifts her gaze toward the back seat and shakes her head. “I’ll tell you later,” she mutters.

  I wonder if it’s what my private detective guessed, that Holden is a product of some kind of abuse rather than just simply a consensual one-night stand. Deciding not to push it, I lean forward and touch my lips to hers, instead of urging her to tell me more.

  “You make me happy, Tennessee,” I murmur against her lips.

  Her mouth curves up into a grin. “I don’t think I remember how I even felt before I met you, Landry. I’ve never been happier than I am right now. The three of us. I didn’t think that I would find anyone who could care for Holden the way that I do, who could accept him.”

  We don’t say anything else. I’m not sure what I can even say to that. Not really. Instead, I clear my throat and exit out of the car. I help Tennessee by leaning in and picking a sleeping Holden from his car seat.

  Making our way inside, I climb the stairs, reaching for the little latch on the gate at the top of the staircase and then walk toward Holden’s room. “I’m going to set him on the bed, then go and get your bags from the car, okay?”

  “Okay,” she whispers.

  Leaving them alone, I hurry downstairs to grab the bags from the trunk. I don’t know why I’m so excited about tonight. Maybe because everything finally feels real. The house is done, we just need furniture and she’s agreed to make this her space with me.

  My phone rings in my pocket and I almost ignore it. Instead, I reach for the device and frown at the number. I made things pretty fucking clear when she left my office that I didn’t want to talk to her again, not without an attorney.

  “You piece of shit,” she slurs. It’s heavier than usual and judging by the time of night, I’m surprised that she’s even awake and not passed out.

  I don’t speak. There’s no point, she won’t hear me anyway, not really. Continuing to make my way toward the bedroom, I don’t respond to her.

  “You told them about the company. They’re pissed at me now, me,” she screeches.

  I hum, letting her get whatever she needs to off of her chest. If I don’t, she’ll continue calling me over and over and over. She rants about how I’m an asshole, that I’m turning everyone against her.

  When I reach Holden’s bedroom, I see that Tennessee has taken him out of his clothes and he’s wearing a new diaper. She’s holding him in her arms and singing a song to him softly. She lifts her head, her eyes finding mine and it’s in this exact moment that I know, I want her to have my baby.

  I’m way too old to be thinking about this shit. It’s probably the worst idea I’ve ever had in my entire life. But it doesn’t matter. I want more of this. She’s beautiful as a mother, inside and out. Ending the call in the middle of Susan’s rant, I power down my phone and shove it in my pocket.

  “Here you go,” I murmur, lifting up Holden’s little backpack as I take it over and set it on the bed next to her.

  “Thank you,�
�� she says softly.

  “I’m going to take your stuff in the bedroom, meet me there?”

  Tennessee’s cheeks tint pink and she nods her head once. I watch her for another moment. The way her hair falls to the side as she opens his bag and grabs his pajamas from the top. She whispers to him softly, words I’m not really paying attention to, but it’s breathtaking nonetheless.

  I want a lifetime of this right here. Every fucking day until the day that I die.

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  TENNESSEE

  Holden falls asleep almost immediately after I tuck him into bed. The bed is bigger than the one at our apartment, but if he notices, it doesn’t bother him. He has his little stuffed brown monkey tight in his grip and holds it as his lifeline as he drifts off to dreamland.

  Walking out of the room, I slowly close the door behind me, then make my way toward the baby gate to make sure that it’s all closed and attached. Only then do I head toward the master bedroom.

  There is nothing but a big wooden bed that was delivered just today in the middle of the room. Apparently, I’m supposed to be picking things out for this entire house, but the stores that Landry keeps telling me to go to are far too expensive. I think I’m going to make a detour this week when I try shopping again.

  Landry is just walking out of the bathroom, a white towel wrapped around his waist and droplets of water on his chest. I can’t look anywhere but his chest, so there is probably water other places, but I’m fixated on the gorgeousness that his strong, broad muscular chest and the smattering of hair that covers it.

  “He get all tucked in, honey?” Landry asks.

  I hum, licking my lips with a nod. He chuckles, no doubt knowing exactly what I’m looking at, but he has no idea what I’m thinking right now. My feet carry me over to his side, then without hesitating, I sink to my knees in front of him, taking the towel with me before I toss it to the side.