by Rena Rossner
“It’s going to sound crazy.”
“I’m all ears.”
“I think that this part of the forest is enchanted. I think that it will only let girls through. That’s how the Hovlins lured people to their lodge, and that’s how nobody was able to find them.”
“You’re right—it sounds far-fetched. But I agree with you that something in the forest here feels wrong. Something in the air makes me want to turn back and not walk this way. Go. See if your theory is correct. Try to find their camp. I’ll stay here and watch the forest. But I’m coming after you in half an hour if you’re not back.”
“Thank you.” I turn to go. This time, as I walk I feel the trees parting for me. There are fruit trees everywhere. I look for a place to stop and call the swans, but no place feels right. Something leads me in a certain direction. I can’t argue with the air and the branches that guide me.
I walk through the pine glade as if in a dream, propelled forward, and I see a clearing with a fire pit in its center. Nobody’s there. There is a large lodge just across the way that suddenly appears as if it’s carved out of the very trees that are still rooted there, and some small cabins that dot the surrounding forest.
How did they build all this so quickly? They’ve only been in our town for just over a week …
I take a deep breath and knock on the door of the first cabin I see.
Nobody answers.
I try the next cabin, and the next.
“Hello?” I hear a voice.
I think it’s Laya! But she sounds odd. And it seems like the door is bolted from the outside. I unlock it and open the door.
“Thank God! You’re alive! You’re okay …” I crush her to me.
“Of course I’m okay.” She looks at me quizzically. “What are you doing here?”
“I’ve come to rescue you and take you back home.”
“Rescue me?”
“Yes! Let’s go! It’s quiet—nobody saw me come here. They must all be out at the market. If we go now, we can escape before they get back. I unbolted the door—now’s your chance to escape. Let’s go!” I take her hand.
“Liba! Stop!” Laya smacks my hand away. “Are you mad?”
“Shhhh! You’ll alert someone.”
“There’s no one to alert,” Laya says in a voice that doesn’t sound like her own.
“I know! That’s why we need to go right now!” I grab her hand again.
“No, stop, Liba, you don’t understand!” Laya bats my hand away from hers again so hard it hurts.
“What?” I say.
“Look at me,” Laya commands, sweeping her hands over her skirt and fluffing her hair.
I look. And I see that she is dressed in a beautiful gown the color of moss and cranberries. Her hair is clean and woven with golden leaves and branches. Her cheeks are pink and her eyes sparkle.
“Don’t you see? Fedir has asked me to marry him, and I said yes.”
“You said what?”
“I said yes. I meant to come tell you, but time feels like it’s flying by … with so many preparations for the wedding and coronation.”
“Coronation? What are you talking about?” My mouth gapes open. This is not my sister. She’s not acting anything like herself. Her voice is languid, dreamy, as if she’s tired … or drugged.
“Oh yes, I’m to be Queen. Did I forget to mention that? Perhaps I did. Well anyhow, I hope to see you there if you can make it. I will be wed in three days’ time. Fedir was here before, but he left to make plans. There is a closet here full of beautiful clothing—all in my size! But now you must be off—I have much to do to prepare my trousseau. And I don’t think they will be pleased to see you here.”
“Your trousseau?” I shake my head in disbelief.
“Mami would love it so,” she says. “But alas, she’ll probably never see it. By the time she comes back, we may be off to the next town or village.” Laya’s hands flit through the air, as if painting a picture on the wind. “Fedir said he would send a messenger bird with an invitation to you, but you know how birds are.” She laughs, then tsks. “So flighty. It’s no wonder it never reached you.”
I shake my head again as if to clear it. Something in the air is making me feel foggy and distant as well. A messenger bird? What is she talking about? What has happened to my sister? I blink and rub my eyes, and for an instant I see that Laya is dressed in rags. And on her head is a crown of thorns. I squint my eyes and blink them, and she’s dressed in finery again. I don’t understand. I can’t believe any of this. You are a swan, I want to say. Swans mate for life, and you have mated yourself to a monster. But I can’t get the words out.
“I invited Mami and Tati too, but I guess they can’t make it, which just shows you how much they really care about me.”
“Do you even hear yourself? Mami and Tati are in Kupel! Or did you forget that? And they would never come to your wedding. You’re marrying a goy!”
“Well …” She flaps her hands and looks this way and that. “Their loss.” She busies herself with inspecting a piece of her hair.
“Laya, what has come over you?”
“People change. I’m changing. And one day soon Fedir will take me far away from here. They will sell their fruit and tell their tales in the next town, and I will help them.”
“You’re only fifteen! I wish you’d wait a bit and think this through.”
“Well, maybe Mami and Tati should have thought about that before they left us. But Kupel was more important … wasn’t it? The Rebbe is more important than you or me. They made their choice, and I made mine. Just look at this house!” Laya smooths her hands over the velvet brocade of the window drapes. “And these clothes! I have taken care of myself. There are riches here beyond compare. We should take a stroll over to the lodge and I’ll show you everything.” She points out of her front door across the clearing.
My sister has never cared for clothes or finery. This conversation just keeps getting stranger and stranger. “Laya, you were locked in this cabin from the outside. I’m not going into that lodge with you. What if it’s a trap and they lock me up too? You have a chance to run away, right now, with me. Let’s go!” I grab her arm.
“No!” she screeches.
I stop and stare at her. Who is this person and what have they done with my sister? I let go of her arm. “Laya, they’ve gotten inside your head. You’re going to wake up from this dream and you will regret everything. Please, please come with me now. I’ll ask you one last time nicely, but if you don’t agree, I may need to drag you away from here by force. I don’t think you understand what you’ve gotten yourself into.”
She takes a deep breath as though she is steadying herself. “This is what Fedir said would happen. You’re jealous. Of course you are. There’s something strange about the fact that I got chosen first, right, right, right? Something strange about the fact that I’m prettier and nicer and that someone came along and snatched me up and took me away to give me the life that I deserve? A life that Tati could never give us! Well, I’m not giving this up.
“You will spend the rest of your days alone in a hovel with the butcher’s son and never see a town other than Dubossary. One day, this town will matter so little that it will be swallowed up whole by the Kodari. The forest will take back what belongs to it, together with everyone in the shtetl! You spend too much time trying to be perfect, trying to do everything right. But it’s only a matter of time before Dovid learns what you really are—a beast. You’re jealous, spiteful, and self-absorbed, like everyone else in this town. Get away from me! Go back to that stupid hovel and live out the rest of your miserable days. But I’m staying here. I only hope that Dovid is still there waiting for you.”
I feel my face turn ashen. Maybe there is truth to her words. I won’t take her from here by force if this is the way she really feels.
“Well, I guess there’s nothing more to say, is there?”
Laya slams the door in my face and my eyes smart with tears.<
br />
I can’t believe everything that just happened. I turn and run as fast as my legs can carry me. I tear past Dovid, who is waiting for me, and he follows. I run until I get to the river behind our house, where I sit on its banks, not caring that the hem of my dress gets wet, not caring how cold I am, or that Dovid tries to get me to go back home with him. He holds me and consoles me as I cry bitter tears into the river.
74
Laya
I lost my chance
to get away.
It might have been
my only chance.
I lost my sister too.
It’s all my fault.
He locked me in.
I know that.
He said it was
to protect me.
From who?
I wanted to know
but I didn’t ask.
The door is unlocked now
but I sit in darkness
and hear the sounds
of the forest around me:
chord progressions
of insect calls
and birdsong.
String instruments
concealed in trees,
and branches that sing
heartsick melodies
if you listen.
I long to add my voice
to the symphony.
My throat hurts
but not from thirst.
From silence.
I should have told people
what I knew.
What I saw.
Now I wait
and watch
and listen.
I will find a way
to clear her name.
75
Liba
I wake a few hours later all alone and hear the scratching of feet and feathers on the roof. The swans! I think. I bolt up in bed. All is not lost. Maybe they can still help me. My heart swells with hope.
I climb down the ladder and see Dovid napping down below. I don’t remember much of what happened after I ran from Laya, and my insides start to hurt again when I think about the words she said. Dovid was here for me, that I know for certain. He must have brought me inside and told me to lie down.
I find the stained feather and clamber out the skylight and onto the roof.
I sit upon the thatch and close my eyes. I hold onto the feather and take a deep breath. I remember his name. Aleksei Danilovich. I say it like a wish: “Aleksei Danilovich,” blowing his name at the feather, and again, “Aleksei Danilovich,” and squeezing my eyes and exhaling to the wind as though I was wishing on the sky and the air, “Aleksei Danilovich! Bud’laska! Please come! Laya needs you,” I say, the way Mami would have. But all is quiet and I’m still alone.
I listen and wait, but all I hear are other birds and the sound of the wind in the trees.
Oh well. I sigh. It was worth a try. I know Mami said they’d come, but she didn’t call them, I did, and I don’t know if they’ll honor a promise they made fifteen years ago.
I start to slide down the roof and back to the upstairs window when all of a sudden the wind shifts and I smell moss and honey. I look up, and a swan descends. Its wingspan is nearly wider than the roof. I cower and hold onto the chimney as the great bird comes to rest upon the roof beside me.
My heart is pulsing in my chest impossibly fast. My hands itch in places that I know only claws grow. I clench my fists. I must be brave, I tell myself. This is for Laya. I take a deep breath and will the tingling in my hands away.
The largest and most beautiful swan I’ve ever seen comes to sit beside me.
“I need your help,” I gasp.
The bird does not reply.
“My sister has been taken. Well, not exactly taken—she went of her own free will. She’s locked in a cabin, though she seems to be okay with it. But she was poisoned. At least, I think she was. There was definitely something in the fruit she ate, or in the mead she drank, or on the lips of that boy she kissed. And when I was there visiting her, for a minute, everything felt like a mirage. I think that the men who took her might be responsible for two murders as well, but I have no way to prove it. My sister thinks they’re innocent. I’ve done everything I can and I didn’t know what else to do, so I called you.”
Silence.
I start to laugh. Narishkeit. What a fool I am, talking to a bird. Yes, it’s a swan, and he came when I called, but he’s mute or dumb or just a bird. What did I expect? I shake my head.
“Ne zvazhay,” I say. “I don’t know why I’m out here talking to a bird. As if you could do anything. I guess that’s just how desperate or crazy I’ve become.”
A gust of wind then circles the house, a whirlpool of dust and air, and I tremble and draw my arms around my knees, and with a rush of feathers and the popping sound of bones, the bird beside me becomes a man.
A naked man.
“Oy!” I scream and my hand goes to my mouth. I close my eyes.
“You act like you’ve never seen a man before,” he says in a tone that’s almost like a honk.
“Not a naked one.” I’m trembling. A bear afraid of a bird—how ridiculous, my mind says, but I can’t stop my body’s reaction.
“You have nothing to fear. Open your eyes.”
I open them and beside me is one of the most beautiful men I’ve ever seen. His skin is powdery-white and covered in fine white down; his eyes are black as coal. His hair is long and blond and silky—Almost like Laya’s, I think—and now he’s covered with a cloak that looks as if it’s white fur. I reach out to touch it and realize that it’s made of feathers—the same kind of cloak that Mami took out of the trunk that night.
“You’re beautiful,” I say.
The swan-man laughs. “Dmitry Danilovich, at your service,” he says, bowing his head. “You spoke my brother’s name.”
“I did.”
“Why?”
“My mother told me before she left that if my sister ever needed anything I should hold this feather and call his name.”
“She spoke true. But why should I help you?” He sniffs the air. “You are not one of us. You are …” He wrinkles his nose in disgust. “ … a predator.”
“A what?” My blood runs cold. “Don’t be ridiculous,” I say. “I’m just a girl.”
“How do we know this isn’t a trap? That you don’t have all your kind waiting in the house or in the woods to devour us all?”
My kind?
“There’s only me,” I say, but I think of Ruven and Alter, though of course I don’t mention them. “I didn’t need to call you here,” I say, indignant. “I only did because I thought you’d care. My mother is one of you, and that means that I’m actually part of you too—half swan. Swans mate for life—at least, that’s what she told me. Aleksei was her mate. I thought that maybe that meant something. But I guess it doesn’t. Never mind.” I turn away from him and make it look like I’m heading back inside.
“It does mean something.” He pauses. “It means everything. Tell me what’s wrong.”
I shrug my shoulders. “My sister is not well. It’s like a madness is upon her. She met this boy in town, Fedir Hovlin—he sells fruit in the marketplace with his brothers, and ever since she spent time with him and ate of the fruit she hasn’t been herself. Now they’re engaged, but he’s keeping her locked in a cabin. My mother made me promise to call you if Laya was ever in trouble, and she is. At this point, anything is preferable to who she’s with.”
“That does not inspire confidence.”
I rub my forehead. “That’s not how I meant it. You have to understand: the community we live in, it’s very insular. My father will never approve of Laya’s choice—not Fedir, or a swan … she’s only fifteen. I want her to know that there are choices out there and I thought that maybe if she met one of you … my mother said that swans mate for life and I wondered if … does my sister have a mate? Could she meet him? It’s a far shot, I know. But if she knew she had a choice. If she saw that there was another way …”
Silence.
“If you don’t want to help me, fine. Just go back where you came from. I can help myself. She’s to be married soon anyway, so it’s probably too late.”
I start to climb down off the roof in earnest.
“Wait!” Dmitry says.
“Why should I?” I sigh, defeated. This was just a stupid idea. Like all my ideas. How could the swans possibly help me? Will she hate me for saving her? Is it possible for her to hate me more than she already does? I can’t do anything right anymore.
“Your sister is mated?” he asks.
“I don’t know. Does she have a swan-mate?”
“That’s not what I meant. She’s ‘engaged,’ as you say in human terms? Has she mated with him?”
“I don’t know. I hope not. She’s living with him now, so something of that nature may have happened or could be about to happen. I hope he waits until marriage.” I swallow. “If you could just … help get her out of there. That’s all I ask. I’m not asking for a miracle—I just want my sister back.”
“I must discuss this with my family. I’ll be back. Here—” He plucks a feather from his cloak and hands it to me. “This is my promise.” And in a rush of air and feathers, he shifts back into a swan and takes off.
I watch him go and shake my head.
There’s nothing I can do now but wait.
76
Laya
I feel something at my lips.
It smells divine. Like Fedir.
I open my mouth
to kiss him,
but I sink my teeth
into flesh instead—
a peach.
My mouth moves
against the fruit.
It’s so tasty!
I latch onto it
and begin to suck.
Mmmm, Fedir, I moan,
my eyes closed.
It is delicious.
But then
everything spins.
He picks me up
and carries me
out of the cabin.
My eyes flutter open
but I am tired tired tired.