“I don’t know what to say now.” She admits and I can’t help but feel the same. “I thought I’d immediately tell you what’s happened, but… I’m just glad to hear your voice.”
Reluctantly I second that. “It doesn’t even matter.” What am I saying? Of course it matters. “I’m going to kill him if I see him. You know that, right?” Now that sounds more like me. “How could you, Elle? I don’t…” I blow out a breath and shake my head as the hand holding the phone to my ear trembles with anger and sadness. “I don’t even know how to react.”
“I haven’t cheated on you. It’s all just a stupid mistake.”
And here come the excuses. “Don’t…”
“We got drunk. I was upset about losing my job, so we got drunk. I went to my bed and he went to his bed. Nothing happened.”
My hand stops trembling and my sorrow vanishes, only to be replaced with a large amount of rage, which I’m succeeding at suppressing for now. “So explain why and how he was answering your phone this morning.”
“We somehow switched phones. I know it sounds unbelievable, but it’s true. I took his phone and he took mine. We both have Samsungs, so our ringtones are the same.” Her voice is desperate. I’m not sure whether to believe her. I’ve seen this happen before; the person believes their partner and they only continue to hurt them in the same way. “I’m telling the truth; it was a stupid mistake.”
I bite down on my lip and rub my eyes with my finger and thumb, pulling them to the bridge of my nose as my mind spirals with images of her and Jordan, tangled naked together in the sheets. “I don’t know whether to believe you or not.”
“You should. I’m not lying. You can speak to Jordan too, if you like. He said he’d talk to you in hopes that it will clear things up.”
This is so frustrating. My anger starts to clear and my entire demeanour softens. Could I really have made such a stupid mistake and jumped to conclusions, or am I letting my young, beautiful wife pull the wool over my eyes? “I… I need to think.”
“Why can’t you just believe me?”
“Put yourself in my shoes. How would you feel and react if another woman answered my phone first thing in the morning?”
“I’d feel different to how you feel, because you don’t have a female roommate where an accidental phone switch would be possible.”
“I can hear the anger in your voice, Elle. Just the thought of that ever happening pisses you off.”
She lets out a huff of frustration. “Well, duh. You expect me to feel good about that? Besides, I seem to recall believing you immediately and trusting you immediately when you explained that you’ve been going out for drinks with your workmates. I didn’t question it and I think I deserve the same respect.”
“Don’t get prissy with me. I haven’t done anything wrong. We’ve moved past that.”
“Fuck you! We have not moved past that! You lied to me repeatedly and even lied to my fucking face, yet I didn’t give you headaches over it. I also spoke to you about it; I didn’t shut you out like you have done with me.”
My jaw clenches. She’s not wrong, but she’s also not right. “That’s a completely different situation.”
“Is it?”
“Okay, I’m sorry. I should have spoken to you, but I was angry. I had to rearrange my thoughts and calm down.”
“We’re married. Married people are supposed to communicate and trust in each other. Did you marry me just to keep me, or did you marry me because you feel like you can actually share your life with me?”
My mouth falls open but no words come out. That’s a really good question. I’m not totally sure why I can’t answer it. “Okay, I see your point. I believe you, okay? I do, I just… I’m…”
“Jealous? Angry? Upset? Untrusting? The list goes on, Isaac.”
“I should have spoken to you sooner and for that I apologise.”
“So you believe me?”
Do I? “I want to.”
She growls with anger and annoyance. “You’re either going to have to take my word for it, or you’re going to have to break up with me. You can’t stay with me if you think I cheated, Isaac. That’ll cause us both a ton of headaches that neither of us want. I’m not down with that. I don’t want that. I need to know that you trust me. I need to know you believe me and I need to know that I can trust you to confront me if something is bothering you, especially something on this level of seriousness. Stuff like this ruins relationships. You shouldn’t keep it bottled up. It’s not fair on me, especially because I’m innocent.”
“I know.” She’s right; I genuinely do agree with her. How do I just turn it off, though? It isn’t possible. “I’m sorry.”
We both fall silent for a long moment. Neither of us knows what to say or how to act now. She finally talks and her words are soft but sad. “I’m going to go. There isn’t much more we can say over the phone and Kira is here with ice cream.”
I nod, even though she can’t see me. “I’ll call you tomorrow.”
“I’m sorry, Isaac. I should have been more careful. This could have been avoided if I hadn’t gotten drunk last night.”
“Yeah.” I bite my lip and look around me at the bare walls and paint speckled flooring. I chose this because I love this girl with every fibre of my being. I chose this life and this path and this career because she’s worth it. I chose this because I wanted it and I still choose it, because life without Elle is hard to even think about. I’m not being fair to her or to us and I need to deal with that. I contemplate whether or not to tell her about the money I lost last night and the fact I’ve been lying to her about where I’ve actually been drinking, but I figure we’ve had enough drama for one day and it can be something I’ll tell her in the future. It’s not a problem. I’m not going back to that Casino ever again, so my admissions can wait until we’re in a more stable place. “I love you. I’m sorry I reacted badly. You deserve better of me.”
“Me too. I’m sorry for being stupid and not being more careful with my phone.” I hear the smile in her voice and the heavy ache in my chest slowly dissipates. “Make sure you eat well tonight. You get grumpy when you’re hungry.”
My lips twitch before stretching into a full smile, the kind I never thought I’d have again after what happened this morning. “You too.”
“I do not. I just moan a lot.”
“Have you got food? I could pay for a pizza to be delivered?”
“There’s the man I know and love,” she giggles.
Warmth flutters through my chest as that bad chapter ends and we seem to find some semblance of happiness and normality again. “I miss you. Text me if you get too hungry, okay?”
“I will, I promise.”
“Bye, Elle.”
“Bye, Isaac.”
The line goes dead and I’m alone again.
Sigh.
Chapter Eleven
Eloise
The weeks go slowly and the search for a job leaves me restless. I unfortunately find nothing and money is too tight. We’re coping, but only just. Isaac should be getting more money than he is, but my dad doesn’t seem to be giving him enough hours according to Isaac.
At least classes are going well. I’m excelling in my studies and, even though it’s challenging, I’m loving every second of it.
I’ve even made new friends and Kira and I have a regular group we hang with at lunch times and sometimes after class. They’re a great bunch of people and all seem to be in the same boat as me when it comes to money, but they don’t have nice accommodations like I do, so I consider myself lucky. Money may be tight, but at least I have a nice home away from home.
Even though I now know that Isaac would be okay with me partying on occasion with my friends, I have yet to do so. With everything that happened last month, I’m worried about pushing our luck. We are happy, definitely, but we’re both struggling with the distance and the lack of conversation. Isaac seems down and I don’t know why. I’m assuming it’s work, but he refus
es to state the reason and insists he’s perfectly okay.
I’m home now at least. I can’t wait for him to finish work so I can hold him for as long as I like and talk to him about Christmas and other mundane things that make life worth living.
I was definitely happy to see that the house was clean and tidy when I arrived home this afternoon. The laundry has been done and Isaac has even gone to great lengths to fix numerous problems around the house. Now I’ll be able to decorate the hallway and the bedroom over the holiday period. That’s if we can afford it.
I make myself busy by visiting Isaac’s parents. I stay for as long as I can and even cook dinner for the both of them. They seem happy to see me, but, like Isaac, John seems distant and stressed. It’s not surprising though, as Judith is… well she’s just not Judith anymore.
She doesn’t recognise me at all and barely even acknowledges my existence. Even when I present her with her favourite bottle of cloudy lemonade, she merely looks at me with a blank expression.
I’ve only been gone eight weeks, but for some reason she looks older, more drawn and frail than ever before. It’s sad and I try to make conversation with her, but she seems content to mutter under her breath and try to wander around every so often.
It’s not until John has finished feeding her and I help him put her to bed that I finally leave.
My heart breaks, shatters, explodes and turns to dust as I drive away in Isaac’s car.
She’s not coming back to us again. The chances of her memory returning aren’t even slim to none; they’re just none. No wonder Isaac has been so down recently. This must have been the cause.
My poor Isaac. How badly he must be suffering.
I place his dinner in the oven and decide to soak in the tub until he arrives home. My body is weak and my mind is broken, and I’m not even sure this is something a plentiful amount of hot water and bubbles can fix.
Isaac
Kicking off my shoes in the hallway, I follow the sound of quietly sloshing water. I strip off my clothes as I go, dropping them on the ground in my wake as I pad up the stairs and stop, stark naked, outside the bathroom.
Elle is in there, dripping wet and soaking in a tub, as naked as I am. The urge to join her is unbearable, so I push open the door and allow the images in my mind to take light.
There she is, the woman of my dreams, her head back over the edge of the tub, her body immersed in the warm water with a thin layer of bubbles crackling on the top.
My eyes scan her from head to toe. I watch a bead of water trickle down her forehead to her temple and then to her ear. I want my lips to travel that same path. Does she know how badly I’ve missed her?
Has she missed me just as much?
Her eyes remain closed, her eyelids softly twitching as the light from the candles that sit around the bathroom illuminate her face, thick lashes and the red in her hair with a soft orange and very warm glow. I smell vanilla. She’s used the new bubble bath I purchased for her just last week.
Stepping into the warm room, I quietly walk towards her and bend down to press my lips to hers. I feel her smile as she accepts my welcome home kiss and moves ready for me to sink into the water behind her, which I do eagerly and swiftly, splashing water over the sides of the bath and pulling her back against my chest.
We both ignore my arousal for now. As much as I ache for her touch, I want to enjoy her body first.
My hands, slick with soap, move across her front, cupping her breasts and rubbing her skin gently. She sighs with contentment and, as if by magic, all of my worries and troubles vanish. I love the effect she has on me like that, the way just her presence soothes my very soul.
I forget this feeling when she’s gone. I forget just how much I love her and everything about her. I shouldn’t. I wish I could bottle this feeling and sip it whenever she isn’t around. I’m so tired of the distance.
How are we going to do this for another three years or more until she graduates? I’m barely holding on now and it has only been four months. I just have to hope that it gets easier and we get luckier.
Although luck hasn’t played a huge part in our money issues, that’s for sure.
There’s an itch to return to the one place that has eaten so much of our money in the past four months, but I’m fighting it. I returned to the casino last week, but after I lost sixty pounds I cut myself off and left. I only went back because Tony holds a torch for the nice girl behind the bar who always gives us a free drink when we show our faces.
I should talk to Elle about it, tell her what I’ve done, but it’s pointless. I have it under control. There’s no need for me to worry her. Besides, what would I even say?
“I feel like I’m dreaming. I don’t want to open my eyes.” Elle says softly, her voice sounding relaxed and tired.
“I hate that I don’t get this every night.”
“I second that.”
“Are you hungry?”
She shakes her head and sinks down my body so her head is resting on my chest rather than my shoulder. “I ate at your parents. I brought you a plate back; it’s in the oven.”
“Thank you.” She never forgets about me, never. “We have bad news. The oven is broken.”
“It never worked right anyway.” She laughs. “I’m going to get out. I’m pruning. I’ll get in my PJs and go and nuke your dinner in the microwave.”
“Thank you,” I say, kissing her wet neck softly and keeping my eyes planted on her glorious body as she climbs from the bath and wraps a towel around herself. She kisses my lips before disappearing from the room completely.
Eloise
A shiver runs through me, waking me from my slumber. I feel soft fingers tickling the edge of my lace knickers. My stomach muscles clench in response and my breath leaves me.
“Morning,” is murmured quietly against my neck.
I smile and reach my hand over my head to sink my fingers into his gorgeous blonde hair as he grinds his throbbing length against my rear. “Morning.”
“Do you mind?” He pulls my knickers outwards and releases them, causing the elastic to snap back. He laughs when I yelp at the sting it leaves on my skin.
“Do I mind?” I breathe as his tongue traces patterns on my neck.
A large, warm hand cups my breast and tugs me until I’m lying on my back. I smile up at the handsome face hovering over my own and reach up to trace the stubble along his jaw.
His weight presses down on me as he shifts his leg over mine and nudges my thighs apart.
“Let’s make this morning a fun one.”
Smiling, I lift myself and kiss his neck. “You have to be at work in forty minutes.”
“I’ll call in sick.”
“Liar.”
“We’ll make it quick.”
I snort. “That rhymed.”
Blue eyes turn playful as a hand grasps my thigh and tugs it up until it’s pressing against his hip and his swollen length is pressing against me in the most delicious way.
I shiver a little and my teeth sink into my lip.
“Shall we?” He repeats as his lips ever so lightly touch my own. This time his voice is breathy. I love it when his voice becomes breathy; it sends tingles to my core.
“The fact you’re asking is kind of turning this into more of a chore,” I joke and receive a sharp pinch to my thigh in response. “Arsehole.”
“Don’t mind if I do.” He flips me onto my front in a second, making my stomach lurch with the quickness of it. Squealing and laughing, I try to roll back onto my back, but he pins me by sitting on my thighs and grips my rear with both hands. “Now that I have your permission.”
Still laughing, I continue to buck around in order to free myself. “Stop. I don’t give you permission.”
“I’ve gone temporarily deaf. If you’re talking, I can’t hear you.”
“Get off,” I giggle loudly as his hands pull and rub at my arse cheeks. He slaps one lightly as his other hand starts poking at my ribs.
&
nbsp; I’m laughing so hard I can barely breathe.
I roll from side to side and slap at his hands. He quickly pins my wrists to the base of my spine and leans forward to bite my shoulder.
Wow.
My skin prickles and a wave of pleasure shoots through me, bouncing off every nerve in my body before settling in my lower stomach, causing it to clench and send further tingles to my aching core. I relax as a result and, before I can register what he’s doing, I feel him at my entrance. He circles and pushes, making me wetter and wetter. I can hardly stand it.
“Isaac,” I beg, thrusting my hips upward, causing him to sink in ever so slightly. “Please.”
He delivers.
He delivers it all, slowly, calmly and with a groan that beats all of his other groans.
That noise alone has me clenching with need, which he answers by moving in and out at a languid and teasing pace.
“Every single time we do this, it feels better than the last.” He releases my hands and puts his entire weight on my back. His lips close around the lobe of my ear as I fold my arms under my head and grab fistfuls of the sheets. “Every.” Thrust. “Single.” Thrust. “Time.”
“Ah.”
His movements get quicker and deeper, his hips smacking against me as his teeth sink into my ear lobe.
It burns; everything burns. I feel it so deeply it travels to my feet and burns there too.
My breath won’t regulate. I don’t know how to move or what to do. I’ve never felt so… on fire.
I’m moaning, cursing, pushing back and begging for more all in one. I don’t want him to stop. This should never stop. I could do this forever.
“Elle,” he groans as his chest becomes slick against my back.
He’s losing control. We both are. It’s going to end soon, even though I really don’t want it to.
“Elle, fuck… Elle,” he pushes up on one arm, his chest leaving my back, and I can imagine he’s looking down at where we’re connected. “You need to meet me, Sweet. I can’t…” He seems to choke on his words but I know what he wants. Clenching, I push up against him, allowing him even deeper access.
Destruction: The Distraction Trilogy #2 Page 15