The Column Racer

by Jeffrey Johnson

  “You mustn’t talk like that Edsel. It can work.” Edsel buried his head into one of his hands.

  “Why did it have to come to this?” asked Edsel, “I can’t sleep anymore. I can’t eat. I can’t even look at myself. I can’t keep this going. Their suffering has become my suffering.”

  “Edsel,” said the messenger, “as I traveled the Empire . . . The people, they believe in you. They believe in Degendhard the Great. They don’t believe you will abandon them.”

  “But we are no closer to saving them,” said Edsel, “I sought to extend the nature of life, not hide and watch it end so abruptly.”

  “If you turn yourself in, Edsel,” said Talon, “then all is lost. Degendhard the Great would have been for nothing. The people need change. They need a true leader. Not a monster and his dragons.”

  Areli eyes became wide. Was Fides father Degendhard the Great? No, said Areli, it can’t be. It just can’t be. She kept her position on the wall. She had to hear more.

  “Edsel – you are Degendhard the Great – remember that. Remember your promise to save lives. Now we have to think about saving our future.”

  Areli had to clutch her mouth to keep from screaming. She couldn’t believe it. Fides father, Degendhard the Great. It seemed too implausible to her. She needed to get out of here. She needed . . .

  A hand grabbed her fiercely around her mouth. Suffocating her. It was big, strong. Her arm was pinned to her back, and it shot a searing pain up her arm and into her shoulder blades. She wanted to scream. The pain was blinding and as severe as if someone had tossed her onto hot coals. Whoever it was that had her, he was big. He lifted her off the ground. She tried to kick him. His legs were built like trees – the only damage she did was to herself. The person forced her into the room and threw her onto the floor.

  “I found an intruder,” said the man.

  “She’s no intruder,” said Edsel in controlled hysteria. Areli felt someone kneeling over her. All she could feel was the pain in her arm, the pain in her legs, and the pain present in the heels of her feet.

  “Areli?” said Talon, “Areli, is that you?” She lunged for him, hoping that he would protect her, as her family protected him when her father brought him home, bloody and filthy. She held him out of fear, and for the need of safety. He held her out of tenderness, love, and regret. He could hear the words I’m sorry, forming in his mind. But he held his tongue. As she pressed up against his body, he wished it could stay this way. Her in his arms. He dearly wished this is how things would have happened in the marketplace, and it pained him to think about the truth. “It’s okay, Areli . . . it’s okay.”

  Talon forced her arms off from around his shoulders, fearing that he might never want to let her go, and helped her into one of the chairs. Edsel moved swiftly to the doors. Areli looked over at him, as he looked out into the hallways and then quickly shut the doors and locked them. He then made his way quickly towards her. Areli didn’t know if she should look at him with defiance or with respect.

  “Areli,” said Edsel, “where is Fides? Did she come with you . . . please, Areli. This is important.” Areli could only shake her head. He gave a soft sigh of relief and collapsed in the chair beside her. “Thank the stars,” said Edsel under his breath.

  “Wait . . . so you know this girl?” came the voice of the man who was in there before with Edsel and Talon.

  “Yes – yes, she is my daughter’s friend,” said Edsel, “she rides for the Emperor.” The man walked to the side and examined her closely. Areli hated how his eyes took their time, especially since she was in nothing but a dressing gown.

  “She’s the one from Sector D,” said Talon, “the ones that took me in.” The one that I love, he thought to himself, the one that I will always love.

  “Brave of her,” said the man, “but yes, I recognize her. You’re the one who rode their dragon bareback.” Areli nodded her head and then looked around at the faces of the room. Edsel looked a lot like Fidelja. She didn’t see him much. Always working. Always busy. The man who continued to look her over had grey hair wrapped into a pony tail and dressed in all black, except for the red in his tie. She looked at the man who had grabbed her. Her eyes took in the large animal-like muscles, his head and neck being half the width of his burly chest. Talon looked as beautiful as ever. She noticed he had taken her father’s exercises to heart, as his posture and walk were flawless.

  He smiled at her, and she could do no less than the same. The feelings she had for him, which were forgotten and suppressed, resurfaced with abrupt force. She found herself still attracted to him. And she hated him for that. She was with Yats now. She would always and forever be with Yats. Areli allowed herself to look around the room, a distraction from her feelings, something she had to do the last time she and Talon spoke. She let her eyes rest on Fides father, who still had his head buried in one hand. The formidable Degendhard the Great – head buried in hand. It made her mad. It infuriated her so much that tears came to her eyes. She hated the man for so long for not turning himself in, but then she couldn’t help but be affectionate towards him for not.

  “Can I get you anything, Areli?” asked Talon, kneeling next to her, rubbing away the tears on her cheeks. He pulled his hand away quickly. He could not trust himself around her. His feelings for her were too great. She shook her head and tried to tell herself to get a hold of herself, but she couldn’t. Hate and love for both Talon and Degendhard collided with one another, and she could do nothing but feel it’s pain, so immense, so excruciating, that she found it hard to breathe.

  “You must hate me,” said Edsel, looking over at Areli, his own eyes a mess of red and wet. Areli shook her head. Again wiping the line of tears that slid across her skin. “I want you to know . . . that I . . . that I never meant for it to get this far.” She couldn’t speak. She didn’t know what to say, even if she tried. “Fides doesn’t know . . . she can never know.” The only word that seemed to circulate around her mind was why. And Areli thought about Sofi. This would be the information that would bury Fides. The information that would take her life. Fides own father was going to kill her. As inadvertently as it was, a fact was a fact. He was going to be the cause of her death. Areli had to be strong. She had to protect her friend. She had to find composure.

  “Promise, Areli,” said Edsel, “I beg of you to promise me you won’t tell her.” She felt a burning in her heart that traveled to her stomach and then spread to the far reaches of her body.

  “She deserves to know,” said Areli, her voice soft, tears still crawling from her eyes.

  “I know she does,” said Edsel, “but I’m asking you not to tell her.”

  “Why?” asked Areli, exhaustion and desperation on the tip of her tongue.

  “Because,” said Edsel, “I know she is strong. She is. But if you told her . . . It would destroy her.”

  “But you’re Degendhard the Great,” said Areli.

  “Timing,” said Edsel, “when the time is right. Then she can know.”

  “And when is that?” asked Areli, her voice vicious, like a mother scolding a selfish child, “when she is captured, beaten, and executed in front of the entire city?” Edsel looked back into his hands. “I mean do you have any sort of plan? What have you been doing while others suffer? Tell me. What?”

  “Areli,” said Talon, putting a hand on her shoulder. Enjoying the touch and then regretting it. She looked at him with furrowed brows.

  “NO!” yelled Areli, shrugging Talon’s arm off of her, “I want to know. What have you been doing Degendhard? Huh? What?”

  “I’VE BEEN TRYING TO KEEP MY FAMILY ALIVEI!” screamed Edsel, his eyes a mess of tears and inner torture, “think what you want of me, Areli, but I didn’t go into this thinking people would actually be sent to their graves because of this. I saved so many lives. We saved so many lives. And it’s all falling apart. All of it. And I am struggling just to keep it together.” Areli looked at him. She was so mad, so disgusted, that her tears start
ed to evaporate away. Either that or boil off. She could hardly stand the sight of him. This broken man. This so-called hero. He was ugly to look at. And the sight of him burned her raw. She grabbed a vase of flowers on the table next to them and threw it at a wall, shattering it to pieces, screaming.

  Talon grabbed her around the arms, collapsing with her onto the ground. She couldn’t believe how much she hurt. How helpless she felt. How helpless Edsel must have felt. Even the best of intentions can be soiled. Showing that a courageous man is just as weak, as selfish, and as human as everyone else. The Empire was waiting for him to save them from the Emperor, and he was only looking to save himself. The world never seemed crueler.

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Talon escorted Areli back to Fides room afterwards. He wished he wouldn’t have thrown her presents in the trash. The silence between them was horrendous, and it felt like they were walking on opposite sides of the steps, even though they were right next to one another. Talon wished he could tell her how he felt about her. He could at least tell her ‘Happy Birthday,’ it was a simple enough starter, but his tongue didn’t allow his mouth to open, or was it his teeth.

  Areli was happy to see him, relieved that he made it out of Sector D alive. But she was also frustrated about seeing him. And her mind was further bothered by the swirling fact that Edsel was Degendhard the Great. Sofi was after Fides. As far as Areli was concerned, this was the information she was looking for. The information that Areli had to keep hidden from her informants. She needed to say something. She hated this silence between her and Talon.

  “Why didn’t you come and see me?” asked Areli, “I mean, how long have you been here?” She didn’t know why she asked that question. She could care less if he came to see her. But her mouth must have thought otherwise. Talon bit his tongue and pointed his face away from her so she couldn’t see him grimace. “What’s wrong? Talon, I can tell something’s the matter. Tell me.” He shook his head, fighting whether or not he should tell her the truth.

  “I’ve been here for a while, Areli,” he said with clenched fists.

  “Why didn’t you come and see me then?” asked Areli, still wondering why she kept pushing the question, “or my father or mother?” Maybe it was closure. He didn’t want to see her because he didn’t love her. He didn’t want to see her because he was in love with somebody else. He didn’t want to see her because he could care less about her. She wanted something. Something to confirm he would never love her. This was her moment to confront him, like Fides confronted Amer. Talon took in a deep breath and looked at her with red and pained eyes.

  “I did search for you,” said Talon, slowly, struggling with the hurt, his lungs collapsing in his chest.

  “And?” prompted Areli, “did you find me?”

  “I did,” said Talon, wiping his eyes now.

  “Then why, Talon? Why didn’t you bother to say hello?”

  “Because you were with someone.”

  “Oh,” said Areli, with nothing else to say.

  “I take it he’s your boyfriend?”

  “Yes, Talon,” said Areli, “he’s my boyfriend.” She was irritated and angry at him. “However, that shouldn’t have deterred you from approaching me. I would have introduced you. You didn’t have to be all shy about it.” They were nearing Fides door. Talon’s promise to the maid came rolling into his head. He promised her. Even though, given the circumstance, he knew he shouldn’t. A promise was a promise.

  “Areli,” said Talon, gently.

  “What? Talon, what is it?” She was tired, agitated, and annoyed at this point.

  “I came to Abhi to find you. I came back because I had to tell you something.” Areli looked at him. His eyes were cast to the floor. He had looked so strong before. But now he looked weak – vulnerable. “Areli . . . I . . . I love you. I’ve loved you since the first day I opened my eyes again. I should have told you before. I was stupid. It was foolish of me not to tell you. And I’m sorry. I’m sorry it took this long to tell you. I’m sorry I’ve said it too late.” Areli’s heart had stopped beating. She let out a breath of air and she feared she would never inhale again. She had dreamed of his lips saying those words to her. She had dreamed it forever. She had even prayed so dearly to the stars for Talon to love her.

  She approached him. A tear rolling down her cheeks. Snot boiling up in her nose. His eyes a mess also. And his shoulders shook from the weight of it all. She cringed her forehead, and she twisted her lips in a funny way. And then she slapped him in the face. And then she slapped him again.

  “How dare you, Talon,” said Areli, in pained grasps, “how dare you do this to me. Do you know how much you’ve hurt me? How many tears I’ve spent on you? And now. Now, of all times, you tell me this. No! No, Talon. I’m with Yats, now. I’m sorry, Talon. I loved you. I had loved you. But you should have told me then. You should have gone after me then. It’s too late for us now. It’s just too late.” She covered her mouth and her hand shook as she did. Tears carved their way down her face. He tried to reach for her.

  Areli backed away. She shook her head once, and then disappeared into Fides bedroom, locking the door behind her.

  Chapter Thirty

  Areli sat up in bed, looking at Fides. She didn’t allow herself to go to bed, not after what happened. She couldn’t believe Talon. But she was with Yats now. She was completely devoted to him. Talon had his chance . . . and he blew it. She would forget about him again with time. He would become a distant memory. How did he even get into Abhi? It didn’t matter. She had to shake Talon from her thoughts. She had more pressing matters. Her only motivation now was the protection of her friend. She had to figure out just who Sofi has working for her, and she was going to have to be cruel and vicious to get them to back off. Sofi’s informants could no longer be allowed to feel safe to search and pry. Areli would make them all afraid. She would be the protector Fides father could never be.

  As Areli sat there, she thought back to the conversation of the night. She had Edsel tell her how he did it. She had him tell her everything.

  “The idea just came to me one day,” said Edsel, “I was traveling. It was the first time I had had ever been outside the mountains of the Valley, and I found myself in one of the small towns in Sector C. It was tax day. One of the Emperor’s favorite days.”

  Areli knew what happened on tax day. It was a day in which the Emperor got back all the money he paid out for the Empire’s work to be done. Everything from building roads, creating statues, harvesting grains was paid out of his pocket, and on this particular day, he set out his officials to bring his money back. The people had tried to rise up before, because of this, but with the battle dragons at the Emperor’s disposal, their uprise was futile, for the Emperor had never cared about land damage because his hold throughout the world gave him the option to have crops grown elsewhere. Those who didn’t live in his Valley, he allowed to suffer in poverty, stripping them of possessions and money whenever tax days came along. Those who couldn’t pay were given death. The men tortured. The women raped.

  “So many innocent lives, Areli. Murdered and wasted,” continued Edsel, “all at the hands of their own Emperor . . . who was only looking for an excuse to kill. It sickened me. Haunted me. Shamed me. So, one day, I thought to correct it. Being the Imperial treasurer, I was in an advantageous position to tip the balance. I have no assistants in the treasury. No additional clerks. Just me and the records I write and ultimately kept. It was easy to tamper with the holding records. The Emperor has so much gold and treasures, Areli, that he doesn’t even know what to do with it all. He just keeps it locked away in the bowels of his palace. If some gold were to go missing or disappear, I knew none of it would be missed. The Emperor would have never known he had it in the first place.

  “I was only twenty-three years old when I stole my first gold coin from the Emperor’s vault. The rush . . . well, the rush was exhilarating, even liberating. But I had to be smart. Too much, and I feared I would not
be able to cover my tracks.

  “So then each day, I would take coins. One became two, two became three. I got bolder, Areli. I became so bold that eventually I was taking a full sack of gold with me when I left every evening. I continued to stock-pile gold for three years before I started recruiting.

  “I enlisted the help of retired, disgruntled soldiers, people who wished to make peace with the cruel and terrible things they had done for the sake of the Emperor. People who were on the verge of killing themselves for their sins. I offered them a chance at redemption. All they had to do was deliver the stolen sacks of coins to people less fortunate.

  “I sent with them special instructions. Making sure to press upon the soldiers to tell the families they visited that the coins were only to be used for necessary buys. To hide and conceal the coins where no one would ever be able to find them, except for them. I reminded the soldiers to tell the families they were not to brag, not to boast, not to even hint at their newly acquired prosperity. As time went on, people wanted to know the source of their good fortune, and that’s when Degendhard the Great was born. To be absolutely honest, the name was actually the name of my dragon when I was a child. It was such great times back then, Areli. We were making such a difference. We were saving lives. Now. Now, I don’t know if we saved anybody, but just delayed their deaths for a few decades.”

  “Where do the messengers come in?” asked Areli.

  “As time continued . . . the soldiers aged. They became no longer fit for the physical toll of the task at hand. So I replaced them with messengers. Young men and boys like Talon, here, who volunteered to help.”

  “How did they hear of you?”

  “I have my ways. But mostly it’s families that wanted to help. Thinking it necessary of them. To help the cause in any way they could. So, when their children became old enough, they sent them to me.”