It's My Life (Filming Rhiannon. Book 1)
Page 20
“Who was she?” I ask.
“It doesn’t matter; she doesn’t matter to me.”
“Okay.” I shrug my shoulders. He doesn’t want to tell me, but I will find a way to get to the bottom of this.
"I’m sorry, are you ready to go home?" he asks me. If he has nothing to hide, why does he keep saying sorry?
"I don't have my car." I say storing his apology away for later.
"I'll drive you home. I personally don't think you should be at work anyway." he says. Well at least there is something he and Kaleb can agree on, even if they don’t know it.
"I need money. I can't bail work." I say sadly.
"Come on." he says helping me up.
*****
Once we reach my apartment, Jase parks his car and sits there waiting for me to talk.
"Thank you." I say politely needing to break the silence.
"Are you going to be okay?" he asks concerned.
"Yeah I'm going to relax with Grace." I say with a smile. He leans over the console and presses his lips to mine. I let my lips mold to his before I pull away.
"I'll see you tomorrow." I say quietly.
"You can count on it." he says with a cute smile. It's nice to see Jase back. I just hope he hasn’t lied to me.
I get out of the car and head inside.
Once I get inside, I immediately head to the kitchen for a glass of wine.
I fill a glass up, and go put some crap on the TV to fill the silence.
There is nothing good on the TV, and it's usually around this time I would text Grace.
I survive half an hour of TV, but when I get my fresh glass of wine, I decide to pull my laptop out. I wait for it to boot up, and as soon as its loaded up, I load up messenger.
I send Grace a message to see if she's online.
Rhiannon: - Grace you there? X
After a few minutes I get a reply.
Grace: - I thought you had fallen off the planet. What happened to 'I'll talk to you after I'm done with the police'? X.
Rhiannon: - I'm sorry, lost track of time. Having to deal with Jase and Kaleb is tiring. X.
Grace: - How are they both doing? X.
Rhiannon: - Ugh, they're driving me crazy. I think Kaleb is sulking with me, but Jase is talking to me again. Let's see how long this lasts. X.
Grace: - I bet your hormones are all over the place. ;-)
Rhiannon: - Grace, not helpful. X.
Grace: - Sorry babe. But it is funny. What are you going to do? X.
Rhiannon: - I don't know. Move the other side of the world? X.
Grace: - Let me know when and I'll be there. X.
Rhiannon: - No seriously though, I don't know. This sucks :-( x.
Grace: - Two hot men after your ass, I'm sure it is. I'll have the one you don't have, :-P x.
Rhiannon: - Grace not helpful. Plus, you're in a relationship! X.
Grace: - Doesn't mean I have to be boring. I can appreciate a good looking man still. X.
Rhiannon: - You're terrible. X.
Grace: - I know, but you still love me. So tell me, which one is better in bed?
Rhiannon: - Grace! I haven't slept with Kaleb! X.
Grace: - But you want to? X.
Just as I read her reply my door rings.
Rhiannon: - BRB, doors ringing x.
I press send and run to the intercom that links me to the bottom floor.
"Hello?"
"Rhiannon, it's me." Kaleb talks back to me.
"Come up." I say pressing the button that unlocks the door. I run to the door and lift the latch off.
I refill my glass and go back to Grace.
Grace: - Ohhh, anyone interesting? X.
Rhiannon: - I'm back. Kaleb is here. I'll be back on later. Love ya x.
Grace: - You can't go like this. You didn't answer my question, and what does he want? X.
Rhiannon: - Later. X.
Grace: - RHIANNON, don't you dare......
Before she has chance to send the next part of her message I shut the laptop screen.
"Rhiannon?" I hear Kaleb call through the open door.
"In the kitchen," I respond as I turn on my chair to face him. Ready for another round of pitiful arguing.
With my glass of wine in my hands, I stand to greet him.
His eyes look tired, and his hair is a mess. He is wearing a t-shirt and jeans, and has a suit jacket over the top. Damn – I want to see his tattoos; I think to myself.
"Kaleb, what are you doing here?" I ask as we sit on the sofa.
"We found your bag." he says holding it up.
"Yes." I cheer as he hands it over. I check the contents, and everything is here.
"Thank you. Where was it?" I ask as I pull my phone out.
"In the limo."
I check my phone, but the battery is drained. I stand to put it on charge, "Would you like a glass of wine?" I offer.
"Please," he responds as he stands and takes his Suit jacket off.
I wonder in to the kitchen and plug my phone in. I grab another glass, fill them both up, grab a fresh bottle of wine and head back to the sofa.
I hand Kaleb his drink before I place my glass and the fresh bottle on the coffee table.
I sit on the sofa beside Kaleb, and angle my body so I can communicate with him. I have questions I need answering.
"Why did you keep that article away from me?" I dive straight in.
"I was trying to protect you."
"Kaleb, I told you the press was there, I mean you even told me to calm down so I didn't attract them. Did you do this on purpose?"
His face falls, "No," he says hurt. "Rhiannon, I didn't want to hurt you. That was why I asked you to calm down."
"But you still told me all that stuff."
"I had too. I hated seeing you with him. I am jealous and I want what he has."
"But you were so cruel to me." I say still feeling the same hurt every time I think of them dreadful two weeks.
"I couldn't stand watching you with him. It was easier to lash out then to tell you my feelings. I never wanted to hurt you. When you told me you thought I hated you, I had to correct you."
"But why me?"
"I honestly don't know." he says as he comes closer to me.
"Kaleb this isn't fair." I say as he strokes my cheek.
"I can't stop it Rhiannon. It pains me to watch you with Jase. Every time you looked at me, I saw hurt in your eyes, and that hurt me too. My intentions were never to hurt you. I only want to protect you." he says softly.
"But you weren’t protecting me. I was close to quitting." I say emotionally.
"I know, and I'm so sorry. I never meant for you to feel that."
"Kaleb, what is it you want?" I ask him.
"You. Like I've never wanted anything before. You light up my life, you make me laugh, you make me mad. Hell you make me think about you all the time. When I watched you just after you started I wanted nothing more than to take you home.
“When I saw you on screen with Jase I saw red. He was getting something I wanted. Maybe I reacted the wrong way, but I saw you getting closer to him, and it ripped my heart out." he says sadly.
He leans forward, and looks in to my eyes, "Rhiannon, I want you." he says as he slowly lowers his lips to mine.
I don't push him away. I know I should, but it feels great. I can feel the electricity between us, and I don't feel this with Jase.
I'm responding with as much force as he is. Maybe it's the wine taking over me, but I push him down on the sofa, and straddle his hips. As his tongue seeks entrance into my mouth, my tongue is equally taking his. He nips down on my lip as I release a moan.
Carefully so we don't fall of the edge of the sofa he rolls us over so I'm laid beneath him.
"Tell me you don't feel this?" he says as he comes up for air.
I can't respond, I need him too much to wait. I just crash my mouth back on to his. His hands roam my body till he is pulling my hair, raising my head back
some more so he can deepen the kiss.
He pulls away first leaving me panting.
"Rhiannon you are all I ever want. Please don't waste what we have here." he begs me.
Deep down I know what I want. I just don't like the idea of hurting one of them, but I know I'm hurting them both at the minute. I don't enjoy having two people fight over me, it's quite possibly the worst feeling in the world. I know I'm going to lose one of them for good. It will hurt both of us for a short while, because I enjoy the company of them both, but I can't lead them both on. I have to let one go.
I know what I have to do.
I wake the next morning after a restless sleep. I just couldn't sleep.
I know today will be hard, but it has to be done.
I do my daily routine, then head to the kitchen to make a coffee. Once the coffee machine is on I grab my phone and text Grace.
**Sorry about last night. Kaleb found my phone. I have some things I need to do today, so meet up tonight? I'll fill you in then. Rhi XoX**
After pressing send the coffee machine has finished so I fill my mug.
I get a reply from Grace, just as I’m about to leave the house.
**Tonight, no bailing in ANY circumstances! G XoX***
I don’t respond, I just climb in my car, and make my way to work.
I have been at work for two hours now, and I haven’t bumped into Kaleb or Jase. When I got here, I had a new script sat on my desk, which is strange, because I’m supposed to be the only one with a key to my room.
After giving my script a read through, I put it in my bag. As I do I pull my phone out and notice a text.
**One day, and one day soon, you will be mine. don’t fight it.**
I look at the number and it’s from Kaleb. I didn’t even know I had his number. Not his personal number.
I respond anyway.
**Kaleb, am I needed at work today? I can take my script home to read?**
**You know I would rather you be at home anyway. You're here? Stay there, I’ll come up, and you're not doing that script. You can do the next one. You need time off.**
**Kaleb don’t be stupid. I’m not passing this up. I’m here to work. Just back off. don’t come up, I’m leaving now.**
**Too late, knock knock**
He replies as he knocks on my door.
Sulking over to the door I open it, and just let him walk through.
“Kaleb” I greet.
“Rhiannon,” he says as he sits on the sofa. “What are you doing here?”
“I'm working Kaleb. I’m fine why shouldn’t I work?”
“You should take this week off.” he says.
“No, I need the money.”
“Paid leave.” he simply says.
“I might need the money, but I will not take that. Just because you want in to my knickers, doesn’t mean I need special treatment at work. That’s absurd.”
“Any of my employees who have just been released from hospital I would demand staying at home.” he says like I just offended him.
“Thank you, but I don’t need it.”
“Just take the damn week off.” he orders me.
“I don’t need a week, just today.”
“Fine, that’s better than nothing.” he sulkily says.
“Thank you.” I say as I head to the door.
“Hang on, where you running off too?” he asks as he catches up with me.
“I have something to do.” I simply say, “I'll text you later.” I inform him.
“Okay.” he says unsure. Wow, he’s actually listening to what I want for a change.
“Actually hold on, Toby said I was the only one with a key to my room, so why has someone been in?” I ask him, remembering my thoughts from earlier.
“There is a master key to every room. I will look in to who came in. Your paperwork should be left in the folder outside.” he says confused.
“Okay.” I say as I leave.
“Don’t forget to text me.” he shouts as I run down the stairs.
I don’t respond, I’m back outside in no time at all.
The valet looks at me confused as he walks towards my car.
“Miss Addison, is everything okay?” he asks me when he returns with my car.
“Yes thank you.” I respond as I grab my keys from him.
*****
Once I return home I go straight for a glass of wine. I need this before I do anything else. Is it ever too early for wine? I suppose some where it is time for wine, so I will just imagine I am in a different continent.
After a mouthful, I pull my phone out and start to text.
**I need to see you please**
I press send, and the person who received the text rings me.
“Hello.” I respond.
“Hello, are you okay?” they ask sounding a little apprehensive.
“Yes, I’m fine, are you able to come see me?” I ask.
“I'm supposed to be at work, but yeah where are you?”
“I'm at home.” I simply respond.
“Why are you not at work?” they ask confused.
“I just couldn’t face work today.”
“Okay, let me talk to Kaleb, and I’m sure he wouldn’t mind. He owes me anyway. Does he know you're not at work?”
“Yes, I went in but came back home.”
“Why didn’t you come see me?” he asks hurt.
“I just couldn’t Jase. I cleared it with Kaleb.”
“Okay, I’ll try come straight away. Is everything okay?” he asks concerned.
“Not really.” I say with a lump in my throat.
“Okay, I’m coming.” he says as he hangs up.
While I wait for him to arrive I text grace.
**Not at work today. Please come round. Rhi XoX**
**On my way, you okay? G XoX**
**Not really. Talk when you're here. Rhi XoX**
**Okay, I’m on my way. G XoX**
I sit and wait for the pair of them to arrive. After half an hour Jase arrives first. I let him up and wait in the kitchen for him. When he reaches my door, he shouts through,
“Rhiannon?”
“I'm in the kitchen.” I reply as I take another swig of my wine. This is fueling my courage.
“Are you okay?” he asks as he walks in.
He walks over to me, and gives me a hug, and I slowly respond.
This is going to be harder then I first thought.
“Yes.” I reply. If I say too much I’m afraid I will break. “Jase we need to talk.”
“I figured that when I got the message. Rhiannon, what’s wrong?” he is sounding worried.
Lord give me strength.
“I've being doing some thinking.” I say pausing to take a deep breath, “And I can’t do this.”
“Do what?” he asks confused.
“Us.” I say as I crumble his world. A two lettered word has just crumpled his world in front of my face, and its breaking my heart.
“What are you saying?” he asks sadly.
“I can’t do this, us, it’s not working. I am so sorry.” I say as I start sobbing. I hate hurting people.
“Is this because of Kaleb?” he asks hurt.
“Yes and no.”
“It’s either yes or no, not both Rhiannon.”
“I care about you, just the way I feel with Kaleb is different to how I feel with you.”
He takes a step back, “I never meant to hurt you Jase, and I’m so sorry.” I say as my tears continue to cascade down my face.
“So what happens now? You going to run straight to Kaleb?” he asks like I just hit him.
“No, but I never asked for this.”
“You never asked for it? I knew something was going on.”
“Well nothing is going on, not really.”
“Not really? Wasn’t that convincing.” he spits at me.
“Jase please.” I beg him, not sure what for.
“What?” he asks, “What did you want from me?”
“You mean you have been stringing me along?” he asks hurt.
“No, I would never do that, it came out wrong.”
“You said it exactly how you meant it Rhiannon. Have you done anything with him?” he asks.
I can’t lie, but I can’t tell him and hurt him anymore.
“You have haven’t you?” he asks as my eyes turn to the floor.
“You slept with him?” he snarls at me.
“No.”
“But something has happened right?” he is furious with me, but I’m also furious with me.
“I didn’t mean to.” I say in a weak attempt at defending myself.
“So what? Contact? Kissing? What Rhiannon, I need answers.” he shouts at me.
“It was just a kiss.”
“When?”
“The fir.... the night of your Movie première.”
“And?” he asks, “You almost said, the first time. The truth Rhiannon, I don’t think I’m asking for too much.” he continues shouting.
“Yesterday.” I whisper as my tears refused to stop falling.
“Is that it? No more you're keeping from me?”
“No I swear.” then I remember the first kiss in his car that night I was going to drive my car drunk, but I can’t tell him that now.
“Forgive me if I don’t believe you.” he spits harshly.
“Why? What is so special about him?” he asks.
“I don’t know. I didn’t expect any of this.”
“Surly after you kissed him twice, you would know you would have shit on your hands, or were you going to continue doing it?”
“No. if I was going to continue doing it we wouldn’t be standing here now.”
“Oh hallelujah, you tell me after you kiss another man – twice. Raise the flags she knows she’s done wrong.” he says sarcastically.
“You didn’t even tell me about your past Jase. Kaleb had to tell me you’re making your way through them all.”
“Kaleb had no right telling you that, but I guess he got what he wanted at the end.”
“If you weren’t such an ass that night, maybe I wouldn’t have kissed him.” I spit at him.
“So it’s my fault?” he asks as he laughs at me. “You put out and it’s my fault?”
“No, I’m sorry I shouldn’t have said that.”
“I thought you were different Rhiannon, but you're just like the rest. Good luck to Kaleb, he’s going to need it.” he says before he leaves.