Home Goal and My Goal: Two Gay Footballers Stories

by H J Perry

  “What do your parents think?”

  “They’re fine about it, but dad and my agent are both adamant I can’t come out and be a professional footballer. At sixteen, I was offered an apprenticeship. It was a big deal, and I wanted to take it, but dad wouldn’t let me. Not because I was gay, or not just that. But he knew that football is often a bunch of blokes with a pack mentality. It can be brutal.”

  Jason steered the car into a small car park and only then did Scott realize they’d driven to the suburbs, not into town.

  “Scott, I know this nice little Spanish restaurant. Do you like Spanish food?”

  “Are we there yet?”

  “We are there, but if you don’t like it, we can go somewhere else.”

  “Will you impress me with your Spanish?”

  “Probably not. The waiting staff aren’t usually Spanish, and if we meet the owners, they speak English.”

  Once seated, they sat in silence for a while reading the menu.

  “I’ll have whatever you have.”

  “You’re brave; you don’t know what I’m going to order.”

  “You’ve been here before, and I’m always up for trying anything.” Scott flashed his eyes at Jason in what he hoped was a suggestive way. If Jason wanted to interpret the words to apply more widely than just to the food that was fine with Scott. He’d like to try anything with this guy.

  “It’s a lot to take in,” said Scott after Jason placed the order. “You come out to your folks as a teenager, and now you’re deep back in again.”

  “Not so deep. I think I’m a bit obvious to anyone who opens their eyes. Honestly, my folks were fine but from his first-hand experience, Dad advised me against being out. He didn’t honestly want me going into the beautiful game. He found me my agent and my agent backed up what my dad said. No matter how good a player, a manager probably won’t want to invest in a gay player.”

  “But your parents were okay?”

  “Yeah. They’re really cool.”

  “That’s something else we have in common then. My queerness was never a problem for my parents either.”

  “My dad was a professional footballer, so he was adamant that I finish my education before signing up full time for a football club. He’d seen too many boys sign up at sixteen and end up unemployed by twenty. But he also told me not to come out at football. So some of my school friends knew, but that was a different world to my football life where I just didn’t discuss that sort of thing and never have.”

  “Football sounds like it’s still in the last century, with players staying in the closet.”

  “It is. I’ve not exactly thought of myself as in the closet. I don’t pretend to have a girlfriend I just never talk about that sort of thing at all. And I went pretty much straight in with a top football team since I was eighteen.”

  “In Dad’s words, I needed to choose between being gay or being a professional footballer and I chose being a footballer. He’d have been happy for me to have a boyfriend and a different career but thought the life of an out gay footballer would be intolerable. Well, not just that. He thought my career would be over before it began as he said he was sure I’d never get picked for the first team.”

  “So you’ve had no love life?”

  “Sort of. I’ve had sex, of course, but no boyfriend, I’ve not been out on the gay scene. Meeting up with you, like this, it is all completely new to me. What about you?”

  “Oh heavens. I’ve had boyfriends. Sometimes I think maybe it’s because my parents are dancers, I was brought up dancing, and it’s not always been easy. I have got some unwanted attention. So I can totally understand wanting to not draw attention to yourself.” But Scott was eager to give Jason his full attention.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  February 2012

  Jason

  “If we had stuck to our original plan we’d have only just met up.” Scott pushed his empty plate slightly away from him.

  “Do you want dessert?” asked Jason.

  “Are you doing the waitress’s job for her, in case being a footballer doesn't work out for you?”

  “I hear it’s good to have something to fall back on, and as I wasn’t a degree student, I never did get work experience behind a bar.” Jason stacked their plates.

  Scott smiled. “I’m thinking, I can’t afford the extra inches if I’m gonna be seeing a footballer. Maybe I shouldn’t have said that; it’s a bit of a presumption.”

  Jason gazed lovingly into Scott’s eyes. “Do you think this is a one-night-only?”

  Scott leaned forward with his elbows on the table and placed his face in his hands. “Firstly, tonight’s not over and secondly, I already hoped that we’d have more nights like this evening. And then the third question.”

  “The third question. What is that?” Jason leaned forward.

  “So I’ve already known you’re quite a healthy eater, but you use up a lot of calories so are you a dessert man or not?”

  “I have a taste for sweet things.” Jason licked his lips and looked Scott in the eye.

  “But I don’t eat a whole load of puddings so if you’re ready perhaps we could just pay and go.”

  Scott nodded his agreement. He was ready to go all right. He’d admired Jason from afar for many weeks and admiring him close-up was sending his pulse rate soaring. “You know that rule, no public displays of affection. If we’re going to stick to that, then I’m gonna have to get you in private pretty soon.”

  “The feeling is mutual,” Jason replied, pulling out his wallet.

  “I invited you for a drink. Do you want to take that drink up at my place?”

  “Definitely. How far do you live? Because I know you’ve got tinted windows, and I don’t want to have to wait that long before touching you.”

  They slipped into the car, and Jason tapped the dashboard screen of the GPS. The computer calculated the distance to home.

  “There you go, you don’t need to ask me if we’re nearly there yet. The sooner we get going the sooner we’ll be there.”

  “Twelve minutes. I definitely can’t wait that long.” Scott’s hand was on Jason’s face and then slipped to the back of his head. Jason allowed himself to be pulled toward Scott and their lips met in a kiss full of longing. This kiss was leading onto something more, and Scott’s hands wandered down Jason’s body, over his chest and directly to his crotch.

  Jason couldn’t stifle the involuntary moan as the pressure from Scott’s palm was there. Right there, where he wanted it. With great self-restraint, he pushed Scott away.

  “For all that this is a pretty impressive car it’s not the most comfortable place for snogging,” said Scott with a wicked grin.

  “I’ve already told you; a more comfortable place awaits, just twelve minutes away.” Jason pointed to the GPS again.

  “Let’s go.”

  As the car roared through the streets, Scott looked out of the window. He could see heads turning. Everyone saw the Audi, and Scott was glad of the tinted windows.

  “If you didn't want attention perhaps you shouldn’t buy a car like this.”

  “Who said I didn’t want attention? I might not want the world to know about my boyfriend. I might not want to read about my sex life in the tabloids, correction I definitely don’t want to read about my sex life in the tabloids, but apart from that the attention’s good. I want to be recognized for my footballing achievements.”

  “Tell me about them.”

  “I play in the top half of the top football league in the world. Unfortunately, we’ve been knocked out of the European Championship this year, but at least we were in it. I play with and against some of the greatest footballers, and I represent our country in the national team, so hopefully, I’ll be playing for England in the Euro in June.” He paused. “I’m sorry, I should be more modest.”

  “It’s okay, I understand. I’ve grown up in a family where my parents were always competing or training other competitors. Their whole business is built
on success in competitions. And that’s how they paid the bills.”

  CHAPTER SIXTEEN

  February 2012

  Scott

  Inside the grounds of the gated complex, the buildings rose like a scene from a child’s fantasy film, colorful and angular against the softly landscaped gardens and golden hue of the carefully positioned nighttime lighting.

  They approached a low-level apartment block.

  “This is magical,” whispered Scott. It would be even more so if they were holding hands, he thought, but understood the footballer was not out, so that wasn’t going to happen. Even though he’d been told earlier, it only now dawned on Scott that what Jason was doing now was a big deal, bringing a man home. Whereas for Scott, it had always been a very casual question, your place or mine? Without any particular concern as to the answer. Although as a general rule, Scott preferred his own place because then at least he’d be certain he was going somewhere incredibly clean and tidy.

  Scott lived in what must be the neatest student house in Birmingham unless other students had an obsessively compulsive tidy housemate like himself.

  There were many little details to indicate this was a particularly well-to-do estate, not a paupers’ block of flats, such as the plush carpet on the floor and the stylish light fittings in the stairwell. After they had entered through the solid double doors, Jason led the way to the stairs, and they walked up to the first floor. Scott assessed, at a glance, there were three or four apartments on each level. On the first floor, Jason paused at the very first door they came to and raised his keys to the lock.

  “I’m here on the middle floor wedged in between someone on the ground floor and someone above me. Not just someone but a footballer from the same club.”

  Inside a spacious entry vestibule, big enough to be a room in its own right but lacking any furniture, there were many closed doors, presumably to bedrooms, bathrooms, or cupboards. Double doors were propped permanently open leading through to the living area.

  When the apartment door shut, Jason took hold of Scott’s hand and smiled him at him.

  “Welcome to my place.”

  Scott felt his heart pounding in his chest as he moved his way just slightly closer to Jason to close any gap between them. Right there by the front door, still in the large grand hallway, they kissed. With mouths closed, brushing lips and stubbled faces together.

  “I don't know what to do next,” said Jason, his lips close to Scott’s cheek, sending hot breath tickling across his skin. “It sounds crazy, I know, but I’ve never invited anyone back to my place before.”

  “Really?” Scott’s eyebrows rose. “You don't have any mates who come to visit?”

  “I do, actually. Especially the other footballers who live around here, we drop in on each other quite often. I mean I’ve never had a man like you here in my apartment.”

  “You’ve been the guest going to some other dude’s house. What happened next that made you feel comfortable?”

  “Well, much as I want to drag you to my bedroom when I’ve been a guest I’ve appreciated seeing the rest of the house.” He pulled away, and with his hand slipping around Scott’s waist, he led him through the wide double doors. They could easily walk through side by side, into the living room.

  “And now I want you to feel comfortable and relaxed, not like I’ve got you back here for one thing only.”

  Scott thought he wouldn’t have minded checking out the bedroom first but said nothing. He loved the minimalist, modern open plan sitting, dining and cooking area, a living room in the truest sense of the word. An impressive TV screen took up one whole wall. A large sofa that looked big enough and comfortable enough to lie on for a whole day was positioned some twenty feet back from the screen, presumably the optimum viewing position as there was a whole load of dead space beyond that.

  Toward the relatively small kitchen alcove, there was a dining table with six chairs. This wasn’t a kitchen for big catering events but for a man on his own it was probably just sufficient.

  “I bet the picture is amazing.”

  Scott sat down on the sofa and Jason sat beside him. Grabbing a remote control, he turned on the TV. A sports channel soon filled the screen.

  Scott looked from the TV to Jason and raised an eyebrow. “Football, is that all you ever think about?”

  “Not always.” Jason had a hand on the back of Scott's head, running it through his hair. “No. It’s definitely not what I always think about.”

  Scott’s heart pounded in his chest; he couldn’t ever remember feeling so full of excitement and anticipation, being with a bloke. He’d never before been with a guy as charismatic as Jason, as mature and confident. With whom the chemistry clicked, and the attraction was almost overwhelming. As if Jason exuded some sexual chemical that called out to Scott’s animal instincts.

  “Then show me something better,” Scott challenged.

  “That’s something I can do.”

  Jason undid the top button of his shirt, pulled it over his head and dropped it onto the sofa, revealing the sort of sculpted, athletic torso that Scott had only drooled over on the covers of magazines. Magazines that had a fit athlete with a tan and a six-pack on the front. If all the players looked like this, Scott intended to start paying more attention to football, vaguely aware that footballers swapped shirts at the end of games.

  Scott couldn’t wait any longer, and he put his hand on Jason’s face, swept his hand to the back of his head and pulled him into a kiss. As Jason moved closer, Scott reclined on the sofa, allowing Jason’s body to cover his.

  Football played out on the screen—highlights of some earlier match or a live match taking place somewhere else in the world, Scott had no idea. The sound was down; only the flickering of the screen failed to distract him from the warm real-life footballer right there with him.

  On top of him. Kissing him. Touching him. Grinding against him.

  Scott was half upright, half slouched back into the corner and over the arm of the huge, comfortable sofa. Scott ran both hands over Jason’s body, anywhere he could reach, feeling the taut skin over solid muscle and the soft, thick hairs over his chest and stomach. While aware that Jason’s hands were exploring too, under his top, Scott knew he didn’t have a body to compare to an athlete’s. Normally he didn’t feel paranoid about it. He was a slim, fit twenty-one-year-old. Compared to Jason, he felt pale and flabby, but he wasn’t going to let that call a halt to proceedings.

  Jason moved his attention from Scott’s mouth, kissing, licking and nibbling at Scott’s chin and neck. Scott responded. He moaned. His dick strained with the need filling it. He arched his back and raised his neck, offering himself to Jason in an entirely physical way. He wanted Jason so badly.

  “Off.” Jason’s command came like a low growl. His fingers pulling at Scott’s top. Scott lifted his body and raised his arms so that Jason could pull it off him and toss it to the floor.

  The urge for skin to skin contact overcame any self-consciousness Scott had. He didn’t want to keep his clothes on any more than he wanted Jason to remain dressed.

  They both knew where this was going, had done this sort of thing before. But Jason hadn’t done this before, hadn’t brought a man to his own home. And Scott hadn’t done this before. Had never been so turned on kissing a guy. He was in no hurry to move things along in the inevitable direction because he didn’t want to end what was happening right now. But his cock was getting painfully hard. It could be so much better if it weren't trapped inside underwear and jeans.

  “Are you going to show me your bedroom?”

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  February 2012

  Jason

  Jason didn’t want to take his eyes or hands off Scott for a moment, but he forced himself up off the sofa and stood in front of Scott, who moved upright but didn’t stand because Jason was blocking the way. Jason undid his belt and the top button of his jeans, letting them sag open. He enjoyed the way Scott watched, his chest rising
and falling with his heavy breaths. Jason didn’t allow his pants to fall to the floor; this move was about suggestion, not a full show.

  Nerves and excitement combined in an unfamiliar mix. Jason didn’t want to do anything wrong, wanted to make the night perfect for his guest.

  Scott’s hand moved toward Jason, toward his crotch, but Jason took hold of it.

  “Not here. Come to my room.” Jason stepped back and offered Scott his other hand too.

  “With pleasure.”

  Jason led the way, still holding one of Scott’s hands.

  Inside the bedroom, with the door closed, Jason’s instincts took over; this wasn’t his first time. Before reaching the bed, while still standing, Jason pulled Scott close to him. Being the same height they aligned perfectly. Two mouths with slightly parted lips met and melded into a deep kiss. It was hot, the sensation of Scott’s bare skin pressed close to Jason’s. Scott was the same height, Jason noted, but felt smaller in his arms, angular and masculine but not as broad, slender but not as muscular. So blazing hot. Scott’s hard cock prominent, pushed against Jason, Jason equally as hard.

  Letting his hands fall to Scott’s jeans, Jason ran his thumbs around the inside of the waistband, under the belt. He was looking forward to getting the rest of their clothes off, and as much as he wanted the fun to last all night, there was no reason to stay clothed.

  They stepped apart and without speaking Scott began to undo his belt, so Jason slipped off his remaining clothes, all the time watching Scott, who did the same. Still not making it to the bed, as if the journey to that piece of furniture would mean too much of a delay. They reunited where they stood but this time, each wrapped a hand around the other’s cock so that their hands, as well as their dicks, were trapped between their bodies as they got closer together to kiss again.