Quickly he wiped his hand across his mouth. ‘I was trying out your sister’s lipstick. It doesn’t look as good on me as it does on her.’
Beside him, Abby let out a snort.
‘What’s all the noise about?’
Another sister. The place was riddled with them. Mandy stood at the top of the stairs, her eyes skimming with unabashed interest over Abby’s not-quite-straight dress.
‘It’s like Piccadilly flipping Circus,’ Abby muttered under her breath.
Her words, together with the absurdity of the situation, finally took their toll on him and Doug started to laugh.
Abby stamped her foot. ‘It’s not funny, you know. The one time I bring a man home and the whole bloody house decides to hold a midnight party.’
Reaching the bottom stair, Mandy began to snigger which set Ellie off, too. Pretty soon they were all bent over with laughter.
It wasn’t the ending to the evening he’d envisioned, but as he tried to get his breath back Doug knew it had been a long time since he’d laughed that hard.
‘I’m sorry we woke you,’ he finally managed.
‘You didn’t wake me,’ Mandy replied, walking into the kitchen to boil the kettle. ‘That was George’s fault. So it’s only nosey Ellie you have to apologise to and I suspect catching you two making out has more than made up for her disturbed sleep.’
‘That’s gross.’
‘Only if you’re not doing it right.’ Mandy finished making up the bottle for George and then clasped Ellie’s hand. ‘Come on you. Time to go back to bed.’ She glanced at Doug and winked. ‘I promise you won’t be disturbed again.’
After hearing the sound of two doors clunking shut, Abby let out a long, deep breath. ‘So, on a scale of one to ten, how embarrassing was that? Twelve?’
Doug shook his head. ‘No. Twelve was the last time I kissed you. On your drive in broad daylight with two of your sisters watching. This only rated an eleven.’
She raised her eyes to the ceiling and gave him a wry smile. ‘We haven’t had much luck on that front, have we?’
‘No.’ He moved to stand in front of her, clasping her gorgeous face in his hands. ‘But it’s probably for the best.’
‘Oh no, don’t you start pushing me away again.’ She reached up and covered his hands with her own, anchoring him in place. ‘There’s a reason why we end up kissing each other. It’s called mutual attraction. I know I started it today and I’m probably being horribly presumptive, but you must feel something for me or you wouldn’t have kissed me back.’
‘I feel far more than something, but just because I do, doesn’t make this right.’ He inhaled slowly, trying to find his composure. His balance.
‘If you tell me it’s because you’re my boss, I’m going to scream.’
‘It certainly doesn’t help.’ Her lips, thanks to those heels she was wearing, were just a few short inches away. Add to that the feel of their entwined hands against her face, and it felt so, so intimate. And way too tempting. He closed his eyes and searched for the words. ‘Abby, you’re light; I’m dark. You’re warm and open; I’m cold and closed off. You’re also six years younger than me.’
When he dared to glance at her, she shoved his hands away. ‘I’m twenty-four, not bloody fourteen. And I know you think you’re cold, but you’re not. As for being closed, that’s a choice, not a personality trait.’
‘Maybe, but it’s my choice,’ he retorted, his words sounding too sharp, too defensive. ‘Based on my experience of what relationships have to offer.’
She regarded him pityingly. ‘Your parents have an unhappy relationship so you assume that’s the case for everyone? How cynical. And how sad.’
Her words bit into him, icy shards that stung. ‘Yes,’ he countered, his voice sounding tight and clipped. ‘So you’re better off finding someone who believes in the Disney version of life, like you do. Not the over-eighteen version.’
‘Is that what Geraldine gave you?’
‘She gave me sex, yes,’ he replied bluntly. It was time she saw the real him, not this fantasy she had in her mind.
Abby flinched and her eyes darted to the wall behind him. ‘I see.’
He exhaled on a curse, knowing he’d hurt her. What the hell had he been doing leading her on, inviting her first to the gallery and now to the ball? It was no wonder she’d started seeing blasted hearts and rainbows. ‘Abby, I’m sorry. I can’t be the man you need me to be.’
Her eyes welled with tears. ‘You big numbskull. Who are you to tell me what I need? Clearly you’ve decided I’m not the woman you need though, so I guess I should let you go. Thank you for tonight. I enjoyed most of it. I’ll see you on Monday.’
She moved to open the door and stood beside it, waiting for him to leave. As he walked out, his heart felt unbearably heavy. He was used to feeling angry and frustrated, but all that seemed petty compared to the feelings washing through him now. Abby was everything he needed, but how could he take when he couldn’t give back?
He knew when he saw her again on Monday she’d still be his highly-efficient personal assistant. But not his friend.
Soon, when she found a job worthy of her, she wouldn’t even be his PA. She’d be gone, and his miserable life would be back to the steaming pile of shit it had always been.
Except that this time, he’d know how different it could have been.
Chapter Nineteen
It had been two days since Abby had pounced on her boss in his car, snogged him by her front door and then been told she was too childish/innocent/naïve for him.
It still hurt like a bitch.
Who did he think she was, Mary flipping Poppins? She wasn’t a virgin. She knew that sex didn’t automatically lead to love and marriage, nor did she need it to.
Liar. You’re falling for him.
She sighed, picked up the basket of dirty laundry and trudged downstairs. Sundays sucked.
‘Give that here.’ At the bottom of the stairs her father held out his hands for the basket.
‘Do you even remember where the washing machine is?’
He grunted. ‘Less of your cheek. I plumbed the damn thing in. I know where it is.’ His eyes fell on the washing. ‘You might need to remind me what setting to put it on, so the colours don’t run.’
As they threw the clothes into the machine, more footsteps echoed down the stairs. Not echoing, Abby realised. Clomping. She turned round just in time to see Mandy giving a sandy-haired male a goodbye kiss. ‘Was that Roger I just saw leaving?’ she asked as Mandy wandered towards them, holding George. Abby stared pointedly at her watch. ‘At ten o’clock on a Sunday morning?’
Mandy just smiled and kissed the gurgling chap in her arms. ‘Maybe.’
‘Well, well. Things have certainly moved on in the last few weeks.’ An unwanted stab of jealousy shot through her. Mandy and Roger were patching things up, yet her own love life had fizzled out like a reject firework.
Mandy flushed. ‘Is it too quick? I don’t want to seem like a total slut.’
‘I won’t have anyone calling one of my daughters a slut,’ their father grumbled. ‘Especially herself.’
‘And anyway, it’s hardly slutty to spend the night with the father of your child.’ Abby reached out her arms. ‘Oh, come here you big slag. Give your father and sister a hug. I’m delighted things are working out for you. Really I am.’
George let out a stream of giggles and kicked his legs as they shared a group hug.
‘It’s still early days,’ Mandy said, when they broke apart. ‘And I know I shouldn’t look too far into the future.’ She broke into a grin. ‘But what the heck. It feels right this time. Roger’s changed. All the bits I fell for are still there, this time in a more grown-up package. He told me he’s just woken up to the fact that he’s a dad and he wants to make George and me proud.’
Again Abby pushed aside the sting of jealousy. She was too young to want a husband and child. She was just starting her career.
Ma
ndy touched her arm. ‘I’m sorry you and Doug didn’t work out. He seemed like a really good guy. Roger raves about him. Doug this, Doug that. It’s like the man’s some sort of God to him.’
‘Yeah. He is amazing,’ Abby sighed to herself as Mandy walked away. ‘When he wants to be.’
She hadn’t realised she’d said the words out loud until her father put his arm round her shoulders. ‘You all right, sunshine?’
The nickname tugged a smile from her. ‘You haven’t called me that in years.’
‘No? Then I should have done. You’ve always been my ray of sunshine.’ He hugged her closer. ‘Though right now you look like you’ve got a rare cloud over you. If you want a shoulder to lean on, to cry on, mine is always here. A bit arthritic now, but strong enough to bear the weight of anything my darling daughters want to throw at it.’
‘Thank you.’ She swallowed past the ball of emotion. ‘But I’ve cried enough over Doug Faulkner.’
‘Aye, I reckon you have. Still, it will do you good to remember this. Men are daft creatures, but sometimes they do the wrong thing for the right reason. Strikes me he’s trying to protect you.’ His hand shot up in defence. ‘I know you don’t need it, you’re a tough cookie, but he’s not known you as long as I have.’
‘What does he think he’s protecting me from, exactly?’
‘Himself? His family? You’ve told me they’re an odd bunch. Anyway, it doesn’t matter. Put him behind you and get on with your life. If he’s anything like the average male he won’t like being told what to do or how to feel, especially by a woman. He’ll come to his own conclusions, in his own sweet time, though chances are they’ll be the same ones you came to months earlier. If you’re still interested in him by then, maybe it was meant to be. If you’ve found someone else, it’s his loss.’ He bent to kiss the top of her head. ‘Now, how about you remind me how the oven works. I’m going to make us some lunch.’
Walking into work the following morning, Abby remembered her dad’s advice and pushed all foolish, romantic thoughts of Doug aside. He was her boss. Not a friend, because they’d tried and failed at that. Not a man she was falling in love with, because that would make her stupid and she was blowed if she was going to think of herself as that.
‘Would you like a cup of coffee?’ she enquired sweetly when she arrived. He narrowed his eyes at her.
‘Do you mind showing me where you filed the forecast for the savoury range?’ she asked an hour later. He scowled.
And just before lunch. ‘Would now be a convenient time to take you through the week’s diary?’
He finally exploded. ‘No, it bloody wouldn’t!’
‘Oh? When would it be convenient for me to come back?’
A muscle jumped in his jaw and she wondered why she’d ever thought of him as calm. Beneath his millpond surface was a series of white water rapids that raged and churned, though only rarely broke through.
‘Stop doing this, Abby,’ he said finally, only the tightness of his voice betraying his annoyance.
‘What, stop being the courteous PA? You know, I was wrong when I got shirty with you about doing the very same thing. It turns out I can be your PA, or your friend. I’m not sure I can be both, because then I start hoping and wishing for things that apparently aren’t on the table.’
He exhaled loudly, the sound filled with anger and frustration. ‘Fine.’
‘Good. So, is now convenient for the diary walk through?’
His bright blue eyes flared. ‘Don’t push me. You might not like what you find.’
‘Because deep down you’re not Douglas Faulkner but some sort of evil monster in disguise?’
His flinch was visible. Abby watched in confusion as he shut his eyes, inhaled and let out a long, slow breath. ‘What have I got on this week?’ he asked finally.
She’d rarely seen him so tense, so tightly coiled. At least not when it had just been the two of them. ‘I’m sorry,’ she whispered, pulling up a chair. ‘I didn’t mean to upset you.’
Doug gazed into Abby’s soft brown eyes, so full of concern, and his heart lurched painfully. Those damn puppy dog eyes of hers were going to be the death of him. She didn’t know how close her joke was to the truth. In fact, she didn’t really know him at all. Would she still be looking at him with such sympathy if she did?
‘You haven’t upset me,’ he managed. ‘So, about this week.’
She dumped the giant diary he insisted she use onto his desk and went to stand next to him so she could view it at the same angle. ‘You do know nobody except you works from a physical diary any more, don’t you?’
‘I’m an artist. I like to touch and feel, not look at a computer screen.’
‘You certainly have an artist’s temperament.’
He was so very aware of her as she looked over his shoulder, talking him through his various meetings. Nothing she said entered his brain, though everything he sensed – her breath against his neck, her scent, her warmth – would, he knew, be forever branded there.
‘Hey, buddy, I’ve come to take Gerri for lunch and thought I’d pop in and say hello.’ Luke came to an abrupt halt as his gaze ran over Doug, Abby and then back to Doug. ‘Hope I’m not disturbing you.’
‘It’s a bit late if you were.’ Aware his friend had seen more than Doug wanted him to, he eased back, away from Abby. ‘Are those for me?’ He nodded at the arm Luke was hiding behind his back.
Luke’s cheeks reddened and he sheepishly revealed a small posy of freesias.
‘Oh, they’re lovely,’ Abby exclaimed. ‘I bet they smell gorgeous. That’s the thing with freesias. They’re one of the nicest smelling flowers. Good choice.’
Luke beamed. ‘Thank you. I figured it was about time I bought Gerri some flowers.’ He stared pointedly at Doug. ‘When was the last time you bought a lady flowers?’
‘When was the last time you got thrown out of an office?’ Doug countered.
Luke laughed. ‘Okay, I’m off. I’ll see you Saturday.’ He was turning to go when he paused. ‘Hey, Abby, has Doug told you about the weekend?’
‘Umm, no.’
Doug stiffened and shot his friend a few death glances but Luke ignored him.
‘Ever watched the fine art of Brazilian jiu-jitsu?’
‘At the risk of repeating myself, umm, no?’
It seemed his glares weren’t getting through to Luke. Either that or the guy had a death wish because he carried on opening that big mouth of his. ‘How do you fancy watching your boss getting trounced in a few fights at the BJJ Surrey Open? Gerri and I are going and this old man needs all the support he can get.’
‘Old?’ Doug gave him a withering look.
Luke shrugged. ‘You’re in the masters category now. A few more years and you’ll be a senior.’
‘I’ll still be beating you.’
By his side, Abby giggled. ‘It sounds like fun.’
‘Oh, it will be. So, will you come?’
‘I’m not sure Doug would like that.’
Luke let out his easy laugh. ‘Oh, don’t worry about him. Of course he’d love you to watch.’ His eyes twinkled in challenge. ‘Wouldn’t you, Doug?’
Doug swallowed. ‘Support is always helpful.’
Luke clapped his hands together. ‘Great, that’s sorted then.’
Apparently though, his torture wasn’t finished, because Abby spoke again. ‘Could I bring my family?’
While Doug died several deaths at the thought of the whole Spencer clan witnessing his potential humiliation, Luke laughed out loud. ‘Of course. We’ll have a Faulkner supporters group. I’ll get your email address from Doug and we can work out the details.’ He glanced down at the freesias. ‘I’d better go and find Gerri before these start to wilt and she expires from starvation.’
‘I’ve never worked out why I count him as a friend,’ Doug muttered darkly as he watched Luke lope out of his office.
‘I imagine it’s because he’s fun and can charm the spots off a leopard.’<
br />
He slid her a look. ‘You think he’s charming?’
‘He’s managed to persuade Geraldine to let him call her Gerri. I don’t believe anyone else has managed that.’
‘True.’ He recalled his own pitiful attempt, and her scathing reply. ‘Has he also persuaded you to go to a smelly hall and watch a bunch of sweaty people grapple on the floor?’
‘I think I might enjoy it.’ She picked up the diary and moved to the other side of his desk. ‘Though only if you’ll feel comfortable with me going.’
‘You, maybe. The entire Spencer tribe, no.’
‘We won’t bring Pat. I suspect dogs aren’t allowed.’
‘God help me.’ He thought he’d muttered the words in his head, but he must have said them out loud because she started to laugh.
‘We’re not that bad.’
‘Imagining what Ellie and Holly might say sends shivers of dread down my spine.’
‘We won’t go then.’
And now he was faced with her not going, he realised how much he wanted her there. ‘If I’m going to be humiliated, it might as well be in front of as many people as possible.’ He looked straight into her velvet brown eyes. ‘It won’t be pretty.’
The look she levelled at him could have stripped paint. ‘Dad is into boxing and wrestling, so we’ve all grown up watching combat sports. None of us girls are strangers to watching two people fight each other. Either on the television or real life.’ His face must have registered his shock because she gave a despairing shake of her head. ‘Why do men assume girls aren’t up for watching a testosterone fuelled sport?’ When he couldn’t think of a suitable reply she sighed, her hands fiddling with the spine of the diary. ‘You know you keep telling me you’re not the man I think you are, but I’m not the sickly sweet, naïve young girl you think I am, either.’
With that she turned and walked out. As Doug watched her retreating figure he was certain her deliciously rounded hips swayed more than usual.
For the rest of the day he found he couldn’t settle. He kept seeing images of Abby when he’d kissed her by her front door after the ball. Her velvet dress undone, revealing breasts a man would never get tired of looking at.
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