by Kat T. Masen
“You don’t have to decide now,” I tell her.
“But do you want to know?”
“A surprise would be nice. As long as the baby is healthy.”
Ava remains quiet but shortly lets out a sigh. “I agree, please don’t tell us.”
Melinda continues with measurements, going through the various parts of the body. Her focus is fixated on me like she has something to prove. A few times she batts her eyes, possibly unaware she has done so. Soon after, she grabs some tissues to wipe the gel off Ava.
“Here is the photo to take home. You’re free to leave whenever you’re ready.” Melinda glances at me with a knowing smile. “It was nice meeting you, Dr?”
“Dr. Carter,” I respond politely.
“You can call him Austin,” Ava mumbles beneath her breath.
“And, of course, Ava. Good luck with the pregnancy.”
When Melinda exits the room and closes the door behind her, Ava lets out a groan.
“She was so flirting with you.”
“That’s what you took from all of this?” I question her, still in awe from seeing the baby.
“I’m trying to forget that in four months from now, I’m going to have to push this baby out of my vagina.”
“Okay, if we’re playing the game of denial, then no, I didn’t notice.”
“Everywhere we go, women are trying to flirt with you.”
I grab her hand to help her up. “How would you like me to respond to that?”
“What are we supposed to tell people, you know, when we’re together?”
To give Ava some privacy, I turn around so she can change.
“The truth? Ava, I don’t know, okay? We aren’t the first couple to raise a child without being together. Let people judge. At the end of the day, what does it matter?”
“I guess,” she mutters. “You can turn around now.”
“Is this really about people or your family?”
Ava lowers her eyes, fidgeting with the ring on her index finger.
“One minute, I’m like, I can do this. I’m twenty-five and have my own money. It’s not like I have to live with my parents or anything.” Ava’s ramble causes her breath to hitch. “Then the next moment, I literally can’t breathe. A heartbeat? This baby is alive inside of me, and it’s only going to grow bigger.”
Placing my hand on hers, I try to calm her down. “The offer still stands if you want me to come.”
She shakes her head. “No, as I said, I think it will make it worse. But can I call you afterward?”
“Of course, you know you can call me anytime.”
“Even when it’s two in the morning, and I’m craving ice cream and pickles?”
“Chances are I’m on call. So, sure.”
Ava removes her hand but shifts her gaze back onto the floor. With the number of times she’s done that, you would think something interesting is on there.
“Did you tell Lane yet?”
“No,” I admit, slightly annoyed she brought it up. “I was going to tell her tonight.”
“Oh, okay,” Ava trails off, then takes her phone out of her purse to check the time. “Listen, I should go, or I’ll miss my flight.”
With her purse in hand, she remembers the photo on the table beside the bed. She retrieves it, falling into a deep stare. “I think it’s a girl.”
I chuckle softly. “Funny, me too.”
“Shut up, liar,” Ava blurts out with a grin. “You saw, didn’t you?”
I place my hand on my heart. “Swear, I didn’t.”
“You swear on that tattered Lakers jersey you always used to wear, which you swore you’d be buried with?”
“You remember that?” I tilt my head, surprised by her memory. “And yes, I still have it and swear on it.”
Ava lets out a heavy sigh, keeping her smile fixed. “Goodbye, Austin.”
“Ava, just breathe. Lex and Charlie love you no matter what. Just give Lex time to process.”
“And Millie?”
“It’ll work out. Everyone just needs time.”
Inside the small café, I sit across from Lane after asking her to meet me. There’s no point delaying the inevitable, and just like a band-aid—I need to rip it off now to clear my conscience.
“Lane, can we talk?”
“Sure,” she responds slowly, with a grimace. “Is everything okay?”
“There is no easy way to say this…”
“You’re breaking up with me?”
“Yes, but it’s more complicated than that,” I quickly inform her.
Lane bows her head, hiding her pained expression. “I don’t understand.”
“The woman who visited me yesterday—”
“Ava?” she interrupts, lifting her gaze simultaneously.
“Yes, Ava,” I repeat while rubbing the back of my neck. “Well, she, um, a few months back, we kind of had a one-night thing, and she’s kind of pregnant.”
Lane’s face falls blank, to the point her stare is fixed, and it doesn’t look like she is breathing. “I didn’t see that coming.”
“Neither did I.”
“Look, Austin. I get it. I really do.”
Lane stands up, throwing her purse strap over her shoulder. Unexpectedly, she drops her lips to plant a soft kiss on my cheek. I close my eyes in an attempt to stay strong and not allow the guilt to consume me.
None of this is fair, and Lane didn’t deserve this.
“For what it’s worth, Ava is really beautiful. When you saw her the other day, I could see how happy you were to see her.”
“Lane, it’s not like that between us. It was one night.”
“Maybe.” She shrugs half-heartedly with a glazed stare. “But that doesn’t mean the feelings aren’t valid.”
And with that said, she walks out of the café.
Breaking up with someone is never easy, but of all the breakups I’ve endured, this probably was the easiest. Lane is a no drama, uncomplicated woman, which is why I was attracted to her. In addition, we had medicine in common, and having a relationship at work was easy because we got to spend more time with one another.
That is until now.
Working with an ex isn’t quite ideal.
I pull out my phone and look at the time, noting Ava would be in the air.
Me: I told Lane. She took it well, considering.
I’m not sure why I felt compelled to tell Ava, but I tuck my phone back into my pocket to head home.
In only a matter of hours, the Edwards family will know the truth.
The persistent lead weight on my chest onsets a headache, so the minute I get home, I pop some Advil to alleviate the stress.
But nothing works because I can’t seem to get Ava out of my head, worried as she walks into the lion’s den and I’m standing here doing absolutely nothing.
It’s no good for me to stay here, waiting on edge, knowing I’ll get no sleep.
I knock on Jonah’s door. “Hey, buddy, you up for a drink tonight?”
Jonah opens the door, dressed in a pair of white jocks. It should shock me, but I’ve seen it too many times that I’ve stopped caring.
“Name the place, bro. I’m coming.”
Eleven
Ava
The foyer inside my parents’ home appears grander than I remember.
My penthouse apartment in the city isn’t even a quarter in size compared to this house. Although they also own a penthouse in the city, that too is double the size of mine.
Just like an old movie, memories play on a reel. The time I fell down the grand staircase because Amelia dared me to use the laundry basket as a sled. It was all smooth sailing until three steps from the bottom, gravity intervened, and my body flew in the air. To this day, I still have the scar on my knee from when I hit the floor.
And then there was Millie’s prom moment when she stood at the top of the stairs in the most beautiful gown to ever exist. I still remember exactly what it looked like. It was a burgundy silk s
trapless gown with a mermaid hem and high split in the middle of the dress. Her hair was styled with soft curls, parted to the side, showcasing the diamond choker around her neck which belonged to Mom.
I stared in awe, thinking I will never be as beautiful as her.
Then, at the bottom of the stairs with a proud smile on his face, was her prince charming.
Austin Carter.
My gaze falls upon the floor, willing the unwanted feeling of jealousy to dissipate. The dark oak floors are cleaned to perfection since Mom is crazy obsessed with them. As I breathe in the intoxicating smell of something cooking in the kitchen, Mom walks out of the kitchen and down the hallway to greet me.
My suitcase stands beside me at the door when my eyes steadily shift toward her. I swear, this woman never ages, always looking eternally young with flawless and wrinkle-free skin. It doesn’t surprise me why Dad is still irrevocably in love with her even after all these years.
A genuine smile sweeps across Mom’s face. She extends her arms until I fall into her embrace yet keep my distance so she doesn’t notice the swell in my stomach. Inside her warm hug, everything feels right in the world again, if only for this moment.
“Look at you, just as beautiful as your pictures online,” Mom teases while pulling away.
“Mom, you saw me at Christmas. Nothing has changed.” The moment it slips, I mentally scold myself. Everything has changed, you idiot. “Aside from my hair growing longer.”
Mom holds her gaze long enough to make me feel like she can see right through me. I smile, willing she be distracted, and when I choose to keep my mouth shut, she wipes her hands together and asks me to join her in the kitchen.
Leaving my suitcase in the foyer, I follow her through to the kitchen.
“Where is everyone?”
“Your father is at the office but promised he’ll be home for dinner. Addy has a class today and will be home soon. As for Alexa, school, I hope.”
“And Millie?”
“Ashton stays home on Fridays, but she has an activity group with some other mothers down at Venice Beach.”
I can’t think of anything worse than a mothers’ group. No one wants to talk about babies all day long. Was this even compulsory? I make a mental note to google it as soon as I am free.
“She’s really fit into the mom life,” I say with a hard swallow.
Mom smiles proudly. “She has, but you know, she’s always been very nurturing, much like yourself.”
“Me?” I raise my hand to my chest, curious as to how she has come to that conclusion. “You think I’m nurturing?”
“You’re always taking care of others, Ava. It’s how we raised all four of you,” she affirms while placing a plate of sandwiches in front of me. “I didn’t come from a large family. In fact, my family was quite dysfunctional. Your father, though, I envied what he had. It’s why I spent so much time over there with Adriana. I used to imagine what it would be like to live in a house where parents loved each other and didn’t fight. I wondered what it would be like to have a sibling who was around, not one who took off on some backpacking adventure the moment things got tough. I craved stability.”
“You have it, now, though,” I remind her.
As Mom pours a glass of homemade lemonade for me, her eyes turn soft, filled with an inner glow.
“I couldn’t have asked for a more perfect family,” she admits with a beaming smile. “So, tell me, what’s been happening with you aside from the Olivier situation?”
I clear my throat and my mind, trying to come up with anything which isn’t about the pregnancy. As tempting as it is to tell Mom now, I don’t want to put her in a position where she feels compelled to hide it from Dad.
“Eric is doing amazing things as my new publicist. I wish I hired him sooner than wasting my time on Elle Harrison. I should’ve gone with my gut, just like Dad taught me.”
“Eric definitely found his calling. I’m glad he’s doing great things for you. He knows branding and how to leverage from that, plus his legal knowledge is a bonus.”
My hands reach for the sandwiches in front of me. They look so delicious, so I can’t help but grab two even though Mom is watching me.
“The summer launch went well. I’m really excited about the pieces for that. I’ve tried to stay away from skimpy and catered to all women, no matter the sizing. There’s something for everyone this summer.”
“And how are the orders going?”
“We’ve sold out on most of the swimwear, and that’s on pre-order only. The team is trying to see if we can increase manufacturing speed to fulfill orders, especially because we’re only at the beginning of summer. We didn’t expect it to take off. The loungewear and jewelry are what we’re working on now. Dad is really pushing me to produce locally.”
“It always was going to take off, honey.” Mom beams then places her hand on mine. “You understand what women want. You make them feel empowered. By doing that, they feel confident in your product.”
So then, why all of a sudden do I feel like an imposter? An empowered woman wouldn’t sleep with her sister's ex-fiancé because she felt worthless.
“Perception, it’s powerful in its own right.” My feet touch the floor as I hop off the stool with one sandwich in hand. “I’m going to unpack and catch up on some emails.”
“Ava, is everything all right?”
I let out a sigh. “I hope so, Mom.”
There is always a nostalgic feeling when I lay on my childhood bed and stare at the ceiling. I’ve done it so many times I’ve lost count. From the time I first got my period, wondering if I looked any different because I had officially become a woman. To when I lost my virginity for the first time, questioning why having sex was so hyped since my experience was less than desirable.
The wallpaper is blush-colored. It’s subtle enough not to come across as overly girly and was my favorite color growing up. Against the back wall is the king-sized bed which I lay on. The plain white duvet, along with perfectly positioned pillows, style the bed nicely. In the middle of the two large pillows is my stuffed cow—Petunia. I dragged this thing around everywhere from the moment I began crawling, according to Mom, which is why it's tattered and covered in stains.
Removing my shoes, I toss them to the floor, then grab Petunia to inhale her scent. Just like I remember—she smells of fabric softener. Mom tried her damned hardest to clean her up, but nothing will bring Petunia back to her original condition. The corners of my lips curve upward at the scent of the stuffed childhood toy, and gradually, I find my shoulders relaxing.
Petunia continues to sit on my chest as I roll over to my side and reach for my phone in my purse. When I disembarked the plane earlier this afternoon, a text from Austin came through. He had told Lane the truth and broke it off. I’m not sure why a simple text brought this unknown wave of satisfaction. What did I have to be jealous about? We weren’t together, and I don’t harbor romantic feelings for Austin.
Nevertheless, I muster up the courage to respond.
Me: Sorry, I know it wouldn’t have been easy.
I guess, if I’m honest with myself, a huge part of me was worried they would stay together, and she would be a stepmother to my child.
Just as my thoughts spiral into uncharted territory, my phone pings.
Austin: Good luck tonight. Not sure if that’s the right sentiment. I’m working tonight but just text me if you need me.
Me: I don’t think there is such a thing as luck. Though maybe I should say that to you? My dad is ruthless.
Austin: Believe it or not, I’ve stopped worrying about Lex. I may not have the gold star from him, but that’s cool.
Me: I forgot that you were his golden star once upon a time. The doctor extraordinaire. Maybe this won’t be that bad.
There’s a knock on my door. It opens as Addy pops her head in.
“Hey, sis. Glad to have you back.”
Out of all us siblings, Addy is the most level-headed. She never creates d
rama, always focuses on her studies, and does her own thing. Addy rarely dates guys, or at least—she never mentions anyone. Hands down, she lives the most uneventful life out of all of us. Plus, she’s incredibly smart studying psychology.
She throws herself on the end of my bed, leaning on her elbow. So many people say we look alike. The same goes for Alexa. The shading of our hair is the same as Dad’s, and of course—the emerald eyes. Addy has Mom’s nose if I must point out something that’s slightly different to me. Oh, and she’s taller—another trait from Dad.
Millie is the only one who is the spitting image of Mom except for the eyes. We used to joke that she came from a different father, but of course, Dad never saw the humor in that.
As Addy grew older, we became close, but our relationship is a lot different from Millie’s and mine. We’re not as explosive together which many people agree on, including my parents.
And if there’s anyone I can confide in, it’s the person lying on my bed twisting her long braid between her fingers.
“Addy…” I begin with, only to pick Petunia up for comfort. “I need your help.”
“What’s wrong?” Addy immediately sits up, her eyes broadening with concern. “Are you sick? Because, no offense, you look tired.”
“Yes, no, I’m pregnant.”
Addy jerks her head. Her eyes are still wide, and I swear she hasn’t blinked.
“Um, wow, congratulations?”
“There’s more.”
“More?”
“You need to promise me you won’t judge.”
“I never judge.”
“We all judge…it’s what we do as sisters.”
“You, Millie, and Alexa judge,” Addy corrects me. “I don’t judge.”
“Before I tell you this, I need you to know that I was upset. I just caught Olivier in bed. Plus, the Miami event fell through.”
“So, you were feeling sorry for yourself and screwed someone you shouldn’t have on a one-night stand?”