by Kat T. Masen
Yet I’ve spent enough time in the spotlight over the years to know this will blow over, eventually. The media will get bored of me, and they are looking for any story to make a dime at the end of the day.
I choose to stay in Manhattan since this is my mess to clean up, and I can’t run to my parents every time something goes wrong. However, I did ask them to postpone dinner with myself and Austin for a few more weeks, just until the air settles and the paparazzi lose interest in me.
In my own forced isolation, I manage to keep busy, spending my days working. It’s incredible how much you can get done when you’re not distracted by lunches and social outings, or even Eric inside your office complaining his back is sore from yoga because he was too busy staring at the yoga instructor's ass and bent the wrong way.
Beyond working, I spend a lot of time online shopping, figuring out what I need for the baby. I text Mom often, asking for advice. Between her and Aunt Adriana, they give me a list that I need to make sure is ticked off before the baby comes.
As for Austin, he is busy with work as usual. After my argument with him, things are dicey between us. He didn’t press further, and when TMZ revealed I am pregnant, I suggested he stay away from me so that he doesn’t get dragged into this right now.
But this circus show can only go so far.
When I woke up this morning, I decided to take matters into my own hands and take a selfie. I’m sitting on my sofa, opting not to glam up with my hair in a messy bun. The outfit I’m wearing is a white boho dress with spaghetti straps, cute yet simplistic. With my legs crossed, I cradle my bump, gazing lovingly at my stomach while my phone clicks, taking snaps.
Without telling anyone, including Eric, I post it on my social media channels with the caption ‘Baby.’
I turn my phone off, willing the impending calls to go to voicemail, then take my tea and a book out onto my terrace. I miss coffee so much, and tea can never compare to the glorious taste of caffeine. Out of everything, more than alcohol, coffee has been the hardest thing to give up.
Oh, and sex.
Lately, I’ve fallen into this habit lately of reading romance, which doesn’t help me since I have no partner to ravage. The steamier the book, the more sexually charged I become. It’s so frustrating, like an itch I can’t scratch. I’m sure this is why you should be married when pregnant. It has gotten to the point that I’m too scared to take matters into my own hands or use my trusty toys, worried I’ll hurt the baby. It’s all weird but doesn’t stop the damn ache below, which refuses to subside.
As I get comfortable on the lounge chair, a slight sensation taps on my stomach. I place my hands on my belly for the flutter to happen again though it is bizarre as I can’t feel it with my hands. I thought I felt something a few days ago but narrowed it down to gas.
Quickly retrieving my phone, I turn it on, ignoring the constant pinging from messages, including a shouty capitals text from Eric saying CALL ME NOW!, to dial Austin’s number.
“Hey,” is all he says.
“How do you know when the baby moves?”
“The kicks? I’ve heard patients tell me it’s like a flutter. Then, as you progress, they become real kicks.”
“I think the baby moved.”
“It did?”
“I think so. I don’t know. It should be moving by now, right?”
“You’re what?” he asks, then stalls, “Twenty-four weeks? So, yes.”
“It’s surreal,” I breathe, my eyes glancing up at the perfectly blue sky. “It’s kicking and doing its little thing in there.”
“Ava?”
“Yeah?”
“I just saw your post. For what it’s worth, you look beautiful. I don’t want you to feel you have to hide that I’m the father.”
“I just want to protect you, for now. Once the media know, they will follow you, and they can be brutal. I just want us to enjoy this time in the pregnancy without all this unnecessary stress.”
Silence falls between us when it dawns on me that my honesty was perhaps too raw. I’d insinuated there is an ‘us.’ Blame the romance novels.
“So, anyway, are you up for dinner with my parents? Dad asked a few weeks ago, but with everything going on, I kept pushing it back.”
“It’s fine, Ava. I can have dinner with Lex and Charlie.”
Breathing a sigh of relief, I shuffle uncomfortably. “I’m sorry about my outburst the last time I saw you. You can date whoever you want. I was just having a bad day.”
“Happens to the best of us,” he assures me, though his tone is slightly off. “Listen, I have to go, about to clock in. Send me when and where you need me. I’ll be there with bells on.”
“Actual bells?” I tease.
“Just to annoy you, yes.” He chuckles heartily. “Bye, Ava.”
My parents were unable to fly over for a few weeks, but I didn’t mind, given I had been busy with work.
“Where are the bells?” I ask Austin as he pulls my chair out for me to take a seat. “I’m quite disappointed.”
“They don’t make designer ones, and I know you judge when someone isn’t wearing designer clothes.”
Austin looks sexy in his dark blue suit with a white shirt beneath it. He opted not to wear a tie, keeping it less formal. The top of his chest is slightly exposed, and sitting beside him—I can’t help but squirm.
Calm down. It’s just a chest.
“I can’t recall the last time I saw you wear a suit.”
“Let me see.” He raises his finger to his lips while thinking, and stupid me focuses on his lips. “The unfortunate night at the Hamptons?”
I bow my head. “Oh, sorry. Forgot.”
Austin laughs softly. “It’s okay, Ava. Life has moved on. I don’t have any ill feelings toward either of them.”
“But how?” I question abruptly. “I’m still pissed with the girl who tried to steal my prom date.”
“Because… ” he mouths, then leans in closer to me. “I’m sitting next to a beautiful woman who is pregnant with my baby.”
My parents walking through the entrance of the restaurant is the distraction my goddamn vagina needs—the so-called splash of cold water. Although, it’s more of an ice bucket, hard enough to dwindle the heat level to below zero.
Austin and I both stand up to greet them. As always, they’re both looking as stylish as ever. Dad is dressed in a charcoal suit with a black-collared shirt beneath it sans the tie. It’s slightly unbuttoned, just like Austin’s, and it’s obvious to see the women in the restaurant have turned to look at him.
What’s new?
Mom is holding his hand, wearing a lantern green tunic dress with a short black blazer to compliment the outfit. Naturally, my eyes instantly gravitate to her Manolo Blahniks—they’re new from the latest line, if I’m not mistaken.
Austin politely extends his hand to Dad in which he shakes. Mom, on the other hand, hugs him. There doesn’t appear to be any animosity, allowing me to breathe a sigh of relief, for now.
Mom places her hands on my stomach with a warm smile. “Ava, honey. Look at you. You’ve really popped.”
“Yeah, I know. Though I’ve had cravings for creamy pasta, so the carbs could also be the reason.”
“Lex… ” Mom calls softly, “… look at her. You wouldn’t even know she was pregnant from the back. It’s all at the front like a round basketball.”
Dad extends his arms as I fall into his embrace. Then, as we pull away, he gazes at me lovingly. “You’re glowing, Ava. Just like your mother when she was pregnant with all four of you.”
Mom winces. “Except Alexa. That pregnancy was a nine-month glow of morning sickness.”
We all take a seat when a waiter appears at our table to take our order. Dad takes it upon himself to order wine for him, Mom, and Austin while I’m forced to nurse a glass of water. This restaurant is one of Dad’s favorites, and from memory, he’s a co-owner or something like that.
“Dad, do you own this place?”
We all briefly turn quiet, and I wonder at what point Dad’s interrogation begins.
“So, Austin… ” Dad starts with, then takes a sip of wine before continuing, “… Ava tells me you’re almost a second-year resident?”
“Yes, in a few weeks, actually. It’s flown by really quickly.”
“And you’re in the ER?” Mom intercepts with a fond smile. “That must be challenging.”
“It is, Charlie. The days just become a big blur. Even today, we had a multi-car pile-up on the I-78. Thankfully, no fatalities.”
“And have you considered transferring to Cedars-Sinai if the two of you move back to LA?” Dad questions, his expression serious.
“Um, Dad, there’s no we.” I turn to look at Mom for a lifejacket. She reassures me with her eyes to calm down. “Austin and I aren’t together.”
“I’m aware of that, Ava. But don’t you think moving closer to us will be beneficial? Having a child is not easy.”
“Actually, Lex,” Austin intervenes. “I have looked into it.”
Turning to face Austin, my mouth almost falls open. “Since when? I never mentioned moving back.”
“I just want to explore all options because your father is right. Having a child isn’t easy, and having family around will help. My parents moved to Thousand Oaks, but it’s not too far from Hidden Hills.
“We have Eric,” I remind everyone at the same time the food is served.
Mom purses her lips with her fork in hand. “Eric once threw up in your room when he had to change your diaper. You had just started solids, and it wasn’t pleasant.
At this stage, I wasn’t sure whether to be mortified or worried. It’s not like I’m immune to all this baby stuff either. Aside from my younger sisters, I’ve never taken care of a baby, let alone an actual newborn.
“Maybe,” I tell my parents, then glance at Austin. “Austin and I can have a serious conversation about this once the baby is born, but for now, I’m happy to stay where I am. Manhattan is where my life is, and also Austin’s life.”
Thankfully, the subject is dropped.
Most of the dinner is Dad asking Austin about work. It doesn’t surprise me since Dad still has a keen interest in medicine even though his career led him elsewhere. Beside him, Mom watches with a relaxed gaze. It’s almost as if she enjoys watching Dad immersed in these discussions. I recall many years ago, she mentioned to me that she sometimes wished Dad continued his medical career. Though in the same breath, she said that passions can shift when life leads us elsewhere.
Our conversations alter between Austin and me. Dad reminds me once again to get on top of my manufacturing. He even offers his time, willing to do most of the leg work for me. How can I say no? I can barely fit in going to the bathroom these days with my work piling up as we lead closer to the end of this pregnancy.
“Austin, I was thinking of contacting your mother, Kristen, to organize a lunch,” Mom says while nursing her wine in the tall glass it’s served in. “It’s been years, but I would love to catch up with her.”
“I’m sure Mom would love that.” He grins, then turns to me as I lower my head. “She was thinking of flying over to meet Ava properly finally.”
I lift my gaze, then blink slowly. “Your Mom?”
“Relax, Ava. You’ve met her several times.”
“Under different circumstances.”
“How do your parents feel about the impending arrival?” Mom asks, keeping her smile fixed. “Ava must have told you that we were shocked, but nevertheless, any child is a blessing.”
Austin finishes his wine, then wipes his lips with the napkin. “Actually, they were excited. They’ve wanted a grandchild for a while.”
“I’m glad to hear that, Austin,” Dad concludes, then nods. “Ava doesn’t need any more stress while pregnant.”
“Yeah, well, too bad Millie can’t see that,” I blurt out.
Everyone at the table falls quiet as the elephant stands beside us, twirling in her pink tutu, yelling, ‘look at me!.’
Austin is the first to speak. “Give her time, Ava. You know what Millie is like.”
My parents choose not to comment. I assume, by the look on their faces, something has happened back in LA with Millie. If I know my sister well, she has mouthed off about what a terrible sister I am and probably wishes I was never born.
We continue to enjoy our dinner, though we leave little room for dessert. When we finish our meals, my parents call it a night. They plan to stay in the city for another day as Mom has a meeting with Aunt Nikki, and Dad has a day trip to D.C.
All four of us say goodbye, but Mom pulls me aside.
“Ava, a little advice?”
“Sure, Mom.”
“Remember when I said let the chips fall where they may?”
I nod, unsure where she’s leading with this.
“Austin is a good man. Always has been. Don’t let his past with our family stop you from building a future with your new family.”
And with those parting words, she kisses my cheek then steps aside for Dad to do the same. Instead, he uses the opportunity to remind me of the factory space we need to look at. I assure him that I’ll start scheduling some time over the next week.
“So that wasn’t too bad?” I breathe a sigh of relief while Austin grabs my purse for me. “I’m just going to use the restroom.”
“No worries, I’ll wait by the front entrance.”
I head toward the restroom and quickly relieve myself. This pregnancy is doing a number on my bladder. Between all the water I’m consuming and the baby pressing down, I might as well set up my office next to the toilet.
After I wash my hands and exit, I walk past the bar where my eyes fall upon those which look familiar.
“Lochie?”
“Well, if it isn’t the ever-elusive Ava Edwards,” he responds with a smirk.
Lochie Fletcher, the sexy Aussie who caught my eye months ago, looks just as handsome tonight. He’s dressed all in black, standing in front of a motorcycle helmet perched on the bar’s countertop.
“I’m sorry for having to cancel dinner months ago,” I mention, keeping my tone neutral to avoid any conflict.
Lochie’s gaze falls upon my stomach. “I can see you’ve been busy.”
I place my hands on my belly, then tilt my head with a smile. “You could say that. But, look, it’s not what you think. I found out after I met you, and the situation wasn’t ideal.”
“Some things aren’t meant to be,” he murmurs while staring intensely into my eyes.
Swallowing the lump inside my throat, I will my nerves to calm down. The moment a hand settles into my own, my heart slows until I realize the hand belongs to Austin.
“Are you ready to go?” Austin asks, though his tone comes off more like a demand.
Nodding, I then turn back to Lochie. “It was nice seeing you again, Lochie. All the best with the bar.”
“You too, Ava. All the best with the baby.”
As I leave the restaurant with Austin still holding my hand, he remains quiet as we wait on the sidewalk for a cab. When one pulls over, he ushers us in before giving my address to the driver.
“I’m taking you home.”
“Uh, okay, sure.”
The cab ride is quiet, and I distract myself with my phone until we exit and take the elevator up to my apartment.
“Who was that guy?”
“Which guy? The one at the bar?”
Austin doesn’t say anything, keeping his gaze fixed on me.
“Lochie is just someone I know.”
“Someone you know, or someone you’ve been with?” Austin questions with a hard stare.
“I haven’t been with Lochie,” I tell him honestly. “We met a few months ago before I found out I was pregnant.”
“Is that it?”
My head
flinches back, confused as to where this sudden outburst has come from. Maybe I’m not the only one with pregnancy hormones here.
“We exchanged numbers and were going to have dinner, but then this happened.” I point to my stomach.
“So what if I wasn’t there tonight?”
“Wouldn’t change anything. I’m pregnant with your baby, and I’m not exactly looking to date anyone.”
I open the door to my apartment and motion for Austin to follow. My feet ache from the heels I wore, making each step unbearable.
Austin removes his jacket, then takes a seat on the sofa beside me. With his hands shrouding his face, I assume tonight has caused him more stress which explains this bizarre interrogation of my personal life.
“Tonight was a lot. I’m sorry, you know what my dad is like.”
“It was fine. I’ve gone through worse with Lex.”
Now, it’s my turn to fall into a funk. But as I watch Austin beside me, leaning back with his shirt slightly unbutton and sleeves now rolled up. I try to ignore the fluttering sensation in my chest and beg my heart to stop racing. Then, I shuffle uncomfortably beside him, ignoring my raging hormones that turn my mind into a pornographic parade.
“Do you still think about Millie?”
Austin shifts his glance. “Ava, c’mon, really?”
“You guys were together for a long time, and she was your first.”
“That she was. There have also been many women after her.”
“But still.”
“Still what?”
“Never mind.”
The past will always be the baggage we carry wherever we go. But as I sit here next to a man who will be the father to my child, I can’t help but wonder just how we’ll get through this because right now, my thoughts are impure.
Austin looks deliciously sexy.
And that’s exactly how I landed myself in this mess, to begin with.
Sixteen
Austin
Ava removes her heels while recoiling in pain.
She managed to shift the energy between us after my interrogation over the guy at the bar. The moment I saw the way his eyes feasted upon her, I knew they had been more than just friends.