by Kat T. Masen
My phone begins to ring with Austin’s number calling through. Shit, I can’t ignore it, given I had just texted him. I suck in my stomach, inhaling a deep breath, then quickly press accept.
“Hey,” is all I say.
“Ava, what happened tonight…”
“I know, I know. It can’t happen again.”
“That’s not what I was going to say.”
“Oh really? What were you going to say?”
The line goes quiet, forcing me to check to see if we’re still connected.
“I meant what I said earlier,” his voice is low, almost strained. “I don’t want anyone touching you while you’re pregnant with my child.”
“No one has, Austin. I mean, it’s not like I can go out and find someone the way I look right now. Kinda obvious I’m with child.”
Austin sighs, appearing more relaxed. “You’re kidding me, right? You’re stunning. You could walk out onto the street right now in your tattered Lakers shirt, and every man would still turn to look at you.”
My lips curve upward into a smile. “Hey, how did you know I still have that shirt?”
“Intuition,” is all he says. “Ava, I’m serious about the other men.”
“Austin, there’s no other man or men. So, it’s not a problem.”
“Good.”
My fingers tug at the blanket, unsure whether I should say how I feel, given our conversation has turned a corner I didn’t see coming. But, if we’re honest, maybe I owe Austin that too.
“Well, if we’re honest here, then the same should be said for you. I’m not exactly thrilled you’re a single sexy doctor.”
“There is no one else, Ava,” he assures me.
“There can be, at any time. You have the whole package, and you’re still around Lane, right?”
“Yes, I work with her.”
“So…” I drag, hoping he figures out the obvious without me having to spell it out.
“So what?”
“What if the temptation is too hard to resist?”
Austin chuckles softly. “It’s doubtful.”
“Why?” I question, failing to see the humor in this.
“Because, Ava, once you’ve had amazing sex with someone, it’s hard to go back to subpar.”
It takes a moment for my brain to register. The truth is, amazing sex is hard to come by, but no matter how much I try to deny it, sex with Austin is mind-blowing. I don’t know why, but I let all my inhibitions go with him and allow myself to succumb to my own fantasies.
“I have to agree with that.” I sigh, then continue, “I should probably sleep. Tonight took it out of me.”
“Get some rest, Ava.”
“You too.”
We end the call, but now I’m even more confused than before. What just happened? And what did we agree to? Not sleeping with other people, but does that mean we sleep with each other?
Without Millie to dissect the situation, I go to the next best thing—Addy.
“Hey, what’s happening?”
“I slept with Austin.”
“Well, duh. Cat’s out of the bag, baby.”
“No, I meant tonight and twice.”
“Twice?” she blurts out over the speaker. “Tonight? As in now?”
“Keep your voice down!” I warn her, worried Alexa will hear since they’re alone together. With my parents here in Manhattan, Dad instructed Addy to make sure Alexa doesn’t get up to anything. “An hour ago. Addy, what do I do?”
“Did you want this to happen? Who initiated?”
I quickly bring her up to speed with tonight’s events, leaving certain details out which she doesn’t need to know.
“You aren’t going to like what I’m about to say,” Addy proclaims in a confident tone.
“Just say it. I’m a big girl.”
“You’re falling in love with him.”
“Addison Kate Edwards!” I shout, startling even my tired self. “I’m not falling in love with Austin.”
“Quite some reaction, dear sister.”
I throw my head back against the headboard of my bed. “You’re messing with my mind.”
“Look, Ava… ” Addy resigns, then continues, “… you’ve blurred the line and crossed the boundary. I don’t think you’re in a position to be fuck buddies. There’s too much at stake, and despite you not wanting to acknowledge this, you guys have a past. This isn’t some guy you picked up on the street.”
“I know,” I barely whisper. “It’s just, sometimes, when we’re together, it feels like I’ve known him my whole life. It’s easy, you know?”
“You have known Austin for half your life, so I understand that feeling. But, Ava, there is a baby coming. The two of you need to work together to raise this child. This whole sleeping with each other just complicates things. Unless, as I mentioned, you’re in love.”
“When did you become so mature?”
Addy laughs, then releases a sigh. “When I decided not to follow in my older sisters’ footsteps.”
“Speaking of older sisters, um, how is Millie?”
“Truth?”
“Always.”
“Not good…” Addy admits, then stalls. “She just needs time, Ava.”
“It’s been a while,” I barely manage to say. “Should I reach out to her?”
“Millie has a lot on her plate. She’s juggling her marriage, work, and a toddler. So give her some space to navigate through this.”
“What’s wrong with her marriage?” I ask, panicked.
“Nothing, Ava. Will is being Will. He’s not exactly thrilled about Austin and has it in his head that Austin and Millie will be around each other all the time if the two of you reconcile.”
“It’s always the billionaires who act all jealous and unreasonable.”
“Well, Lex Junior is known to be protective over his wife.”
I think of Millie almost every day but admit I haven’t really considered how this affects Will. Of course, he’s a big boy who runs an empire just like Dad. But I guess I’ve forgotten just how alpha male Will is, especially when it involves Millie.
“Just tell her I miss her, okay?”
I say goodbye and end the call, possibly more confused after speaking to Addy. Yet maybe, it isn’t confusion but denial.
I can’t fall in love with Austin.
It will ruin everything.
When I wake up the following day, it all becomes clear. I need to distance myself from Austin, stop any feelings from growing into something uncontrollable.
The answer is to flee Manhattan, at least temporarily.
I call an emergency meeting with Eric. There is so much which needs to be done before the baby comes anyway, and there’s not much time before I need clearance to fly. So, it makes sense to throw myself into work and travel as much as I can.
But, I’m a fugitive running from my own mistakes.
So, I send Austin a text out of courtesy to let him know I’ll be traveling for work. I half expect a lecture on pregnancy and flying, but instead, I get a ‘take care’.
The response comes with mixed feelings, but none of it matters—we both need a time out, and distance is the perfect solution.
“Eric, I really don’t have time for lunch. I know it’s Saturday, but I need to go to the office to finish up some paperwork.”
In the middle of the sidewalk, Eric stops me with his hand.
“Will you just not think about work for two seconds?”
Placing my hands on my hips, I’m tired from the short walk and outfit he insisted I wear today. Something about paparazzi scouring the streets this morning, so I need to look my best. He even picked out a Dolce & Gabbana strapless floral-print dress with a simple pair of blush-colored heels to match.
“Consider it lunch, and work. There, satisfied?”
We walk for another block until Eric stops at a familiar building. When he opens the door for me, I enter and wait for him to give further instructions. He tells me we’re having l
unch on the rooftop. When we enter the elevator, it becomes familiar—Bar Luna.
“Is this Lochie’s bar?”
Eric nods, then the door pings open.
“Surprise!”
There is a big arch with the words ‘baby shower’ spelled out. My eyes immediately gravitate toward Mom standing beside it, and while still in shock, I see Adriana, Nikki, Kate, Alexa, and all my girl cousins besides Jessa.
I turn to face Eric, now understanding why he insisted I dress the way I did for what was supposed to be a business lunch.
“A baby shower?” I ask, unable to hold back my smile.
Mom comes up to me, extending her hands with a grin. “Every mother deserves a shower.”
Nikki, Adriana, and Kate are carrying glasses of champagne. They all hug me, though all three of them look like they’ve had a few, their eyes glassing over and unwarranted giggles coming out of nowhere.
“This is amazing,” I say in awe, admiring the beautifully decorated tables with white linen table cloths and flower arrangements in the middle. As I gaze around the space, the theme is white and mint green, my two favorite colors. I’m assuming it’s also because it’s gender-neutral. Finally, I turn to face Mom and Eric. “You guys did amazing.”
“Oh, it wasn’t us, honey,” Mom quickly intercepts.
“Then who?”
“Me,” the voice says behind me.
I quickly turn around to see Millie with her head tilted slightly to the side. She’s wearing a twist peekaboo yellow dress which compliments her olive skin. Since I saw her last, she’s cut her hair so it’s sitting just above her shoulders.
“You planned this?”
“You deserve to be spoiled.” Millie smiles, keeping her gaze fixated on me. Then, her eyes begin to glass over while she bites her bottom lip. “I’m sorry, Ava. I don’t know what came over me to treat you that way.”
I don’t even think, throwing my arms around her. Inside the familiar embrace, I hold onto her tight as I fight back the tears.
“I missed you so much, Millie,” I whisper in her ear, my words becoming strangled. “God, I’m so sorry for everything.”
We both pull away, but Millie places her hands on my stomach with a grin spreading across her face.
“Missed you too, Ava bear. More than you can ever imagine.”
Eighteen
Ava
Millie stopped at nothing to make the baby shower spectacular.
There is nothing she didn’t think of. Across the rooftop space are clusters of mint and white-colored balloons. The most prominent design is an arch hovering over a floral backdrop and a copper circle with Baby Shower in cursive plating.
In the corner, though large with its stature, are four wooden blocks stacked on top of each other with the letters spelled out to say, BABY.
Scattered around the floor are white rose petals, making the area a perfect backdrop for photographs. Not too far is a table covered in gifts. How the hell does a baby need so many things?
As I continue to take it all in, I’m rendered speechless at the small details Millie thought of. I lay my hand against my breastbone as my chest expands with an overwhelming feeling of gratitude. After all my sister and I have gone through over the past few months, I never expected her to shower my baby and me, especially since she’s been trying so hard for her own.
There are small tables spaced evenly for guests to sit down, and of course, each table is decorated to perfection. I desperately search for the food at the same time my stomach grumbles.
The timing is perfect. Servers walk out of the bar area, which I assume leads to a kitchen.
It’s hors d'oeuvres and small dishes, prepared and cooked by a well-known chef who works at one of the restaurants in the city which my father owns.
The servers walk around, offering each dish to the guests as well as champagne. As for me, I stick to the mocktail yet eye the champagne with jealousy, counting down the weeks until I can drink again.
Correction, months, according to Kate, who also chooses the opportunity to bring up breastfeeding.
“Ava, wait until you see how big your boobs get. They’ll look like some engorged alien head,” Kate mentions casually.
I slowly chew the food in my mouth, unsure whether to be excited about large breasts or terrified by her analogy. They have already grown, almost double my usual size, but I had no idea they will grow even bigger.
“When I was pregnant with Will, Rocky couldn’t get enough of mine. If I told you what he did when I was lactating—”
“And there goes the crème brulee,” Millie groans beside me, placing her small bowl on the table while scowling. “Please don’t finish that sentence. Thank God Will isn’t here.”
I’m glad Millie kept the guest list small. Just our family and close friends. Back in high school, I had several girlfriends, but we drifted apart over time. I’ve found it hard to find good friends for most of my life when many girls just wanted to hang out with me because my family is wealthy.
In college, I became friends with a few people, but they ended up moving back to England. We keep in touch via social media, but that’s it.
As for Gigi, who was my sidekick for many years, we had a falling out. I was sick of her getting into trouble, especially with men. She was a homewrecker, and I was always caught up in her scandalous affairs. Millie kept warning me about her, but I assumed she was just pissed because Gigi made a move on Will at the Hamptons all those years ago.
The guest who surprises me the most is Austin’s mother, Kristen. She greets me hello when I walk in, but just like I remember, she’s laid back—even looking excited about the impending arrival. I’m not sure whether she is my mother-in-law, or do you have to be married to garner the title by definition?
Married to Austin.
The word marriage onsets a string of emotions, all of which I need to suppress to get through the day. Now isn’t the time to be having these ludicrous thoughts.
Addy stands beside me, and I realize I hadn’t spotted her earlier.
“Hey, sis, sorry I’m late.”
“I was wondering where you were.” I wrap my arms around her, into a tight embrace, then slowly pull back. “Did you just fly in?”
“Yes, I had some stuff to finish and didn’t fit into Millie’s strict schedule.” Addy clears her throat, placing her hand on my shoulder. “I told you it would work out.”
I smile while reaching out to place my hand on hers. “Thank you.”
“So, how’s the Austin thing going?”
“There’s no Austin thing,” I answer defensively. “We’re civil, and things have stayed the way they should have.”
“Or did you coerce the journey to detour by escaping to travel the last few weeks?”
“I needed to work,” I argue back.
Addy purses her lips with a judgmental stare. I know she doesn’t believe a word I say, and frankly, I don’t care. Things with Austin are back to normal after that one night, where apparently, I turned into some sex-crazed maniac.
“I’m going to get something to eat and drink,” Addy informs me. “Enjoy yourself today. Remember this is all for you.”
I take the deepest breaths, ignoring Addy’s comments about Austin, and engage with those who come to chat with me. More than anything, I want a chance to sit down with Millie. Every moment I turn to search for her, she appears busy dealing with servers or Eric.
Then, when I think she’s free, Millie announces it’s time to have fun and play some games.
I don’t want to dampen the fun, but baby shower games? My feet already ache, and a nap sounds so good.
“Now,” Millie yells out, commanding everyone’s attention. “Our first game is to guess how big Mama Ava is.”
“Great,” I utter, then force a smile. “Are we guessing my weight?”
Millie shakes her head with a grin. “Each guest will be handed a piece of string. The person whose string fits perfectly around Ava will be the winner.”
Two men bring out a chair, replicating a throne, and I sit beside the floral wall like a guinea pig. Everyone um’s and ahs, examining my body and making me highly self-conscious.
Millie collects all the strings, requesting I stand up so we can determine the winner. It is down to Mom being the closest until my cousin, Luna’s string is close to perfect. Eric hands her a small Tiffany gift bag. Damn, maybe I should play if these are the prizes.
Considering Eric spends the most time with me out of everyone here, his string is so big, you can fit two of me in there.
“Sorry, hun.” He cringes, then breaks out into an overbearing smile. “You still look fabulous, though.”
“I’ll remember that the next time you ask me how you look when we’re in the change room of Prada.”
Eric throws his hand to his neck with a dramatic gasp. “You wouldn’t dare lie to me in the Holy land.”
I glance sideways, purposely ignoring him.
Millie calls for order as she announces the rules for the next game.
“The game rules are that each person is given a baby bottle with champagne inside it. The first to finish wins,” she informs everyone. “Now, don’t think this is easy. It’s quite a challenge, so don’t be afraid to give it your all if you want to win.”
Only a few come forward to play, so it doesn’t surprise me when Adriana, Kate, Nikki, and Mom, decide to challenge each other.
“Ladies,” Eric says confidently, “I shall join you. Let the games begin.”
When Millie counts down, each of them begins sucking the bottle in hand. Apparently, it’s more complicated than it looks since the teat is relatively small, so it comes down to your sucking skills.
“Why is this so disturbing?” Alexa complains.
Luna raises her hand to cover her mouth, attempting to control her laughter. “Because Aunt Charlie is winning.”
“Why is my mom doing that thing with her tongue?” Sienna scowls, then closes her eyes. “Is it some British trick?”
I burst out laughing, knowing Uncle Noah and Kate are very active in the bedroom. Actually, not just the bedroom but everywhere. I’d overheard several conversations between Kate and Adriana because Mom didn’t want to hear anything about her baby cousin Noah and his stallion ways.