Sex in the Sanctuary

by Lutishia Lovely

  Sistah Flora had suggested Millicent see a specialist immediately to help her deal with the devastation of the weekend’s events, and Millicent agreed. She was ushered into a hastily scheduled appointment the next day, and after a two-hour session, the doctor had written a recommendation that Millicent take a two-month leave of absence from her job. Millicent had gone into work late that evening and cleaned out her desk before calling her boss with the news the next day. Shocked didn’t begin to describe the reaction her news elicited from her boss and coworkers. Not that Millicent was aware of it—these incidents passed in a haze. All Millicent knew was that she needed to leave the scene of the crime, and all she could think of was her childhood home. She felt that if she could just get back to her Mother, she would live.

  The day her flight left for Portland, she’d had a long conversation with Vivian. She’d given her the condensed version of the chain of events that had led her up the aisle in a Vera Wang dress and Manolo Blahnik pumps to the man she thought was destined to be her husband. Vivian had tried to minister to her but realized that only time and God could begin to heal the gaping wound in Millicent’s heart. Only then, after the healing began, would Vivian or anyone else be able to reach her effectively. Still, she’d given her several inspirational tapes, including some of her favorites by Joyce Myer, a Midwest minister, and a book of Psalms that included additional daily Bible readings and true life stories of people who’d overcome extreme adversities, up to and including death. She, Mother Moseley and Sistah Flora had given Millicent a ride to the airport and stayed with her until she passed through security. They’d already spoken with her mother and knew she would be there to greet her daughter as soon as she arrived. And her mother had been there, an oasis in the desert, beckoning Millicent as she walked into the baggage claim area. She’d run and fallen into her mother’s arms, and although she didn’t know it, the healing began at that moment.

  And now, as the calendar heralded the coming of Thanksgiving, the healing continued. God, the invisible doctor, had never left her side.

  Sacred love

  It had been over a month since Tai returned from California to find her world turned upside down by King’s amorous behavior. As October gave way to November, King’s actions had been exemplary. He’d obviously cancelled some of his out of town speaking engagements because he’d been home every night. At first Tai felt very uncomfortable and was unusually quiet. But old habits die hard, and before long she was joining in on lively evening discussions with King and the children and, although she wasn’t ready to admit it, actually enjoying the feeling of family. That feeling had been missing from the Brook household. Just two days ago, Tai had acquiesced and allowed King to move her things from the guest to master bedroom once again. It was there Tai turned to face the man she’d loved before she was even old enough to understand the word. Her mind was filled with jumbled emotions, thoughts and memories fighting for attention. She looked up into eyes the color of chocolate ice cream and scanned the lips that could bring her to ecstasy inside of ten minutes. Although they hadn’t been intimate, they’d spent long hours of the night discussing their marriage, their relationship and their lives. King stated over and over again that he’d do whatever it took to save the marriage. She looked at what was being offered to her and wondered if she should walk away from the father of her children, her spiritual covering and former best friend. For the first time, she was strong enough. She knew that she could do it, but not if she should do it.

  King hadn’t pressured her to resume their physical relationship, but he’d let her know in no uncertain terms what he wanted and how he wanted it. And he wanted her. Physically. Mentally. Spiritually. Completely. That was what he said. She thought of how much she’d loved this man, how much she still wanted to love him and how she’d longed to feel those strong, muscular arms around her, holding her, squeezing her, loving her.

  And here he was again, reaching out his arms to her, asking for another chance. She didn’t step into those arms, however. Instead, she stepped back and away, still holding on to the threads of anger. She knew she was supposed to forgive him. That was what marriage was about. But for a reason she couldn’t name, she hesitated. “King, it takes a lot to make up for the hell you’ve put me through,” she said softly. She shook her head slightly before turning around. “I need to take a shower.”

  Tai sat on the bench in the bathroom, a thick terry towel wrapped around her. She slowly sipped the now warm apple juice, reliving the events of the evening—another evening of King pledging his love. Of all the things she’d imagined as her homecoming a month ago, this had not been one of them. She remembered again, as she had often in the last thirty days, the decorated room, the gifts, the dinner. And this stranger who looked like King but talked like someone she hadn’t met before, had stayed past dinner that night and even now was sitting on the king-sized bed just beyond her tile-floored sanctuary. There was sincerity in his eyes, along with a vulnerability that had never been there before. She sensed a spirit of true repentance that hadn’t accompanied his other apologies. What happened while I was away? Tai pondered the thought. A snapshot of that candle-filled master bedroom scene a month ago flashed into her mind. She imagined King’s cocoa-dipped body splashed against that satiny, golden comforter and smiled while the ropes of anger and hurt loosened a little more from around her heart.

  So what are you going to do? God asked.

  Tai knew what she wanted to do. She wanted to run into that room and jump on that bed and make mad, passionate love to her husband.

  So, why don’t you?

  “I’ve just gotten myself to the point where I can live without him, and I kind of like it.”

  Maybe you had to get to the point where you could live without him in order to live with him.

  Tai had never looked at it like that. The California trip helped her realize King and the children had been her whole life. She was able to see clearly how she’d put her entire life on hold and turned all of her attention toward them. In the process, she’d lost herself. And once she’d lost herself, she had nothing left to offer King.

  Tai stood and dried off while continuing to think. Had King changed, really changed? Tai wanted so much to believe him. She thought how wonderful it would be to have a real family again, a real husband. She thought of April and just as quickly tossed the thought aside. If King could forget her, so could she. Well, maybe not immediately but one day at a time.

  Tai thought back to the S.O.S. Summit, when they had explored the meaning of unconditional love in Spiritually Speaking. Tai realized that that was what she had to practice, consciously, and that if she did, their marriage could not only survive, but flourish. With all of his faults, even in his rusted, tarnished armor, King was a good man. He was God’s man. He was her man. He was waiting for her on the other side of that door, and she would be a fool not to go and get him. Tai turned, a bottle of lotion in hand, and jumped when she saw King lounging in the doorway. She’d been so deep in thought she hadn’t even heard it open. King took in her naked body, the bottle of lotion, the towel at her feet and Tai’s surprised expression. He smiled lazily and reached for the bottle. “Can I help you with that?” he asked before grabbing her hand and ushering his wife back into the master bedroom.

  “King, really, I can do it myself,” Tai said, trying unsuccessfully to grab the lotion from King’s upraised hand.

  “Come on, baby. I just want to help. I’ll rub the lotion on your back. That’s all.”

  “Yeah right,” Tai quipped, turning around and resigning herself to melting at King’s touch. “Well, I’m waiting. Hurry up, I’m getting cold.”

  “If you lie down on the bed, you’ll be warmer,” he suggested. “I promise, Tai. We won’t do anything you don’t want to do.”

  “That’s what I’m afraid of,” Tai whispered before lying facedown on the satiny comforter. She rolled her hands up and down the soft fabric. “This is nice.”

  “You can thank
Mama. She went shopping with me when I told her I wanted to change the feel of the room. Make it special for you.”

  An involuntary shudder shot through Tai’s body as King touched her at the small of her back, the first intimate caress they’d shared in months. He moved his hands in small circles as he worked the lotion into her back, across her arms and down her legs. Tai kept her legs squeezed together so tightly at first that it would take the Jaws of Life to pull them apart. As King prodded gently, Tai failed at all attempts to remain focused. It was hopeless. She was toast.

  “Baby, open your legs a little so I can lotion them all over.” Tai didn’t move. “Tai?” Maybe she was sleeping, King thought. After all, she had mentioned how tired she was earlier in the evening. But if she was asleep, how could she grip her legs so tightly? “Tai, I know you hear me. Open up, baby.”

  Tai was hoping to hold out, for a little while at least. Yet, here she was, barely fifteen minutes into the seduction, and she was ready to make a vee in the air with her legs and yell out “Welcome home, pardner! Giddy-up!” She eased the muscles in her legs, allowing King to pull them apart. He slowly lotioned one leg first, then the other. He massaged her buttocks and kneaded her shoulders. Suddenly, just as Tai was about to turn over, he got off the bed.

  “What are you doing?” Having decided that she would indeed surrender, she was ready to wave the white flag and be taken into captivity.

  “Setting the stage,” King replied quietly. He reached for the lighter on his dresser and set about lighting the candles he’d purchased to replace the ones he’d thrown away. Tai sat up in bed and watched him move. The candlelight played hopscotch across his naked body, the glow touching parts of his body her hands longed to feel. Their eyes met and held as he walked back to the bed and lay down, facing her. He reached out his hand and outlined her face with his finger. “You are so beautiful,” he whispered. “More beautiful now than the day we met.” He tentatively touched his lips where his fingers had been. Tai remained motionless, closing her eyes and reveling in King’s touch, his feel, his breath, his scent. He kissed her hungrily, as though she were the first meal after a forty-day fast. He grabbed her then and held her close, his throat working up and down as he fought back tears. “Can you ever forgive me, baby? I love you, Tai.”

  Tai hugged him back, her own eyes shiny. After all they’d been through, she still had some love left for this man. She still wanted him and their marriage. She still wanted to be his first lady and to be Mount Zion’s Queen Bee. After taking another hit, the marriage was still standing. She hugged him even tighter. “I forgive you, King Brook.” She pulled away from him then to look into his eyes. “I love you, too.”

  King and Tai embraced, bodies rubbing, hearts touching. They demonstrated how much they loved each other. As it was in the beginning, the two became one—sacred love.

  Love was a beautiful thing

  Crystal blue water lapped the edges of the white sand beachfront. The lazy ebb and flow of the ocean seemed to rock the Bahamas, and everyone on the island, into a contented lull. Pelicans and seagulls flew overhead, while smaller birds darted in and out of the palm trees and other vibrant, green foliage. Seashells in hues of orange and pink and beige and white dotted the shoreline, interspersed with seaweed and algae. Couples strolled quietly on the beach, and farther down the sandy border, surfers glided in the calm waters, waiting for a windy swell that would allow them to catch the big wave.

  Not fifty yards from the ocean front, Derrick, Vivian, Tai and King sat at an upscale, island restaurant enjoying a native dish of peas and rice, fried conch and plantain. They were all sipping nonalcoholic drinks with umbrellas in them, surrounded by cherries and chunks of pineapple.

  “I still can’t believe she did it,” Tai remarked before grabbing another forkful of peas and rice. “Like standing in the middle of the sanctuary was something done every Sunday, like this was normal!”

  “Believe it,” Vivian replied dryly. Memories of that fateful Sunday could still cause a flip-flop or two in her stomach.

  King was sitting back in his chair, a grin on his face. “So, Derrick man, what did you do?”

  “Do?” Derrick echoed. “Do? What could I do? I fired up the band and led the church in a round of ‘Amazing Grace’!” Everyone laughed as Derrick broke out in an impromptu rendition of the song at the table.

  “Man!” King continued. “I bet Cy wanted to go through the floor!”

  “Not without his fiancée,” Vivian countered. “He was staring at her like he was on Millionaire and she was the final lifeline. I really think Hope was his anchor that day. Otherwise the man may have floated outta there on a cloud of disbelief.”

  “Shoot. Incredibly pissed off would better describe the cloud I saw. If Millicent hadn’t fainted, Cy’s look would have killed her.” Derrick reached over and grabbed a roll. “Can you imagine some woman coming down the aisle talking about ‘husband, come to me’? In a room crowded with a thousand people? In a wedding dress?”

  “And not just any wedding dress,” Vivian continued. “But in a Vera Wang, baby. Sistah went all out.”

  “Lord, have mercy,” Tai said quietly. “I mean, it’s so crazy you’ve got to laugh to keep from crying, but my heart goes out to Millicent. She seemed so together—attractive, intelligent, so on-the-ball. And this came out of nowhere?”

  “Not exactly,” Vivian admitted. “She’d mentioned something about knowing who her husband was to be, around the time of the summit. We were supposed to discuss it over lunch, but I had to cancel at the last minute, and we never rescheduled.

  “We did talk afterward, about how it happened. She became obsessed with Cy and, in her distorted thinking, took all sorts of ordinary events and made them mean something totally different. Her obsession literally drove her crazy. And one day, she just snapped. I wish I could have done something before she did what she did.”

  Derrick squeezed Vivian’s hand. “Baby, she was set on this course. I don’t think there’s anything anyone could have done.”

  Vivian went on, trying to find logic where there was none. “I can’t imagine the thought process that got Millicent to that point, but she had to have been totally convinced that she was right before taking such drastic action. I mean believing you’ve heard from God is one thing, but to go out and buy a wedding dress, rent a limo and arrange for a marriage license and blood tests, all without your intended’s knowledge, takes the concept of faith to a whole ’nutha level.”

  “Unh-unh, honey,” Derrick interjected. “Like Pastor Price would say, that’s not faith, that’s foolishness.”

  “That’s sad, is what it is.” Tai grew solemn as she imagined Millicent’s pain. Tai had felt pain, deep pain. She could relate. She vowed to put the sister on her prayer list.

  “You’re absolutely right and I miss her terribly. She still isn’t returning phone calls, but her mother says she is improving, slowly but surely,” Vivian continued. “I send her books and CDs I feel will minister to her. I want her to know that we haven’t forgotten her.”

  King was still more amused than amazed. “So how did you handle the members, Dee? I know you had to talk about it.”

  “Of course I talked about it. I used it as a catalyst for my evening message that I entitled ‘Have You Heard?’”

  Tai set down her drink. “No, you didn’t!”

  “Yes, I did. There was no way I could let something that had gone down in the middle of service in the middle of the church not be handled in the middle of service in the middle of the church. I had to nip that in the bud ’less some lesser soul or mind get on that same train with their bright ideas. There’d been too much plotting and trotting after men by the women in the church anyway—and vice versa. It was a good time for me to address the issue. It was also a good time for me to talk about gossip and judging and unconditional love. On the surface, it blew over rather quickly. Although I’m sure it’s still fodder for the gossip mill.” His eyes twinkled merrily. “And Cy
still breaks out in a sweat when he sees a white dress and it’s not first Sunday!”

  “You’re incorrigible!” Vivian said seriously while her eyes chuckled.

  “But Millicent’s okay?” Tai queried again, still feeling for her sister.

  “I hope so,” Vivian responded. “I should try and phone her mother when I get back home.”

  “It sounds like she needs some professional counseling,” King said. “I mean, it’s not like I haven’t heard of this type of thing before; women coming to the church in wedding gowns and stuff. But to walk down the aisle right before the sermon is set to be preached and demand the hand of somebody who’s just proposed to somebody else? Whew! That’s too deep for this kid.” He looked at Tai. “Good thing we don’t have to worry about no crazy mess like that at our church, huh, baby.”

  Tai rolled her eyes. “In this day and age, nothing would surprise me.”

  King smiled and kissed her cheek. “So when’s the big day. First part of next year, I heard.”

  “For Cy and Hope’s wedding? On Valentine’s Day.” Vivian, a hopeless romantic, smiled warmly as she thought about the intimate wedding Hope and Cy were planning. They’d decided to get married on a yacht.

  “You know they want us both to officiate,” Derrick said to King before diving into his dessert. “I told them I couldn’t speak for you, but that I’d make sure the fourteenth was open. Who knows? Maybe you and Tai could make a long weekend out of it and have your own lovers’ getaway in one of our swanky, five-star hotels.”

  King reached out and grabbed Tai in a big hug. It seemed he couldn’t touch her enough these days. It had barely been a month since their reconciliation, and here, as the new year unfolded, King still felt like a kid with a brand-new toy. “Now, that makes the offer sound infinitely more attractive,” King droned while biting Tai’s ear. “A getaway with my baby will make the trip worth the money right there.”

  “Well, Cy Taylor does everything first class,” Derrick continued, as if King needed any more encouragement. “I’m sure everything from your flight to your accommodations to the fee for your services will be superb, buddy. Superb!”