A Place at Our Table

by Amy Clipston

  Kayla gnawed at her lower lip. “Oh no. I’ve already managed to say the wrong thing. Maybe I should go.”

  “No, no, no. That was funny.” He wiped his eyes. “I was laughing. It’s the first time I’ve laughed since . . .” He cleared his throat. “Danki for the food.”

  “Gern gschehne.” She paused. “How are you? Tell me the truth.”

  He blew out a deep breath. “I’m a mess.”

  “I’m so sorry,” she whispered, her eyes shimmering.

  He pointed toward the chair again. “Have a seat. It’s so gut to see you.”

  “It’s gut to see you too. I’ve been worried about you. Here you go.” She handed him the plate and then sank into the chair. She put the cup on a nearby table.

  “Danki.” After a silent prayer he unwrapped the sandwich. “Have you eaten?” He took a bite and savored the flavor.

  “Ya, I have. I took a lunch break about an hour ago.” She fingered the tie on her prayer covering. Was she nervous? “How is your family?”

  He chewed and swallowed as his appetite suddenly evaporated. He set the sandwich on the plate and tried to gather words.

  Kayla’s eyes widened and she held up her hands in defense. “If this is too personal—”

  “Stop.” He reached out and touched her hand, enjoying the warm softness of her skin. “It’s not too personal. I’m just having a tough time choosing the words to describe how I feel.”

  “Take your time.” She pointed to the sandwich. “Eat. You need your strength.”

  A smile overtook his lips. She truly cared about him, and the realization warmed his heart.

  He lifted a chip. “I’ll only eat this chip if you have some too.”

  “But it’s your lunch. I don’t want to eat your food.”

  He raised an eyebrow, and she laughed. He cherished the sweet sound.

  “Fine.” She picked up a chip from his plate, popped it into her mouth, and crossed her arms over her middle. “Now, you eat.”

  He ate the chip and then picked up another and ate it. “Mei haus is so quiet. No one spoke at breakfast yesterday, and it happened again at lunch and dinner. I don’t ever remember the kitchen being that quiet during a meal. We used to all talk at once—like we were all fighting to get Mamm and Dat’s attention. But now all I hear is the sound of our utensils hitting the plates, and no one finishes their food.” He looked down at the pile of chips to avoid her concerned eyes. “It’s like we’re all walking around in a fog. No one knows what to say. To make matters worse, mei schweschder still won’t speak to me, and it really hurts.”

  “Ach, Jamie. I am so sorry. But I promise you it won’t last forever.”

  “I’m starting to think it might.” His shoulders sagged. “I’ve bickered with my siblings in the past. One time, when I was eighteen and Mark was sixteen, Mark went out with his buddies and didn’t do any of his chores. I was left with all the work and he didn’t even thank me. I was bitter, but I forgave him after an hour or two. Cindy’s anger toward me is completely different. It’s like she can’t stand the sight of me. I would never hold a grudge against one of my siblings for this long. I feel as if she will never forgive me.”

  “You know that’s not true. Cindy will forgive you. It’s our way to forgive. She’ll realize she’s sinning by blaming you, and she will apologize for making you feel so bad. Just give her time. Rely on God, and he will carry you through this.” She sniffed and wiped her eyes. “Your family is hurting. My family went through the same pain when we lost Simeon, but we eventually found a way to move on.”

  “How?” He hated the desperation in his voice, but he craved her reassurance to the very marrow of his bones.

  She glanced up at the ceiling as if contemplating the question thoroughly. “I don’t know. I suppose it just got easier one day. There’s no set time line for grieving, but one day it will get easier.” She paused for a moment. “Is there anything I can do to help you through this?” She pointed to the sandwich he’d hardly touched. “Bringing you a meal doesn’t seem like nearly enough.”

  “Just be mei freind.” Inwardly, he cringed at his own anguish. He’d never felt so weak or eager for someone’s approval.

  “That’s easy. I thought we were already freinden.” She pointed to his plate. “You need to eat. You need all your strength in case that alarm goes off and you have to respond to a difficult call.”

  “I will, but only if you help me eat these chips. I feel guilty eating in front of you.” He held the plate out to her.

  “You shouldn’t feel guilty, but I will help you out.” She took a few chips and raised her eyebrows. “Now, you eat the sandwich.” Her eyes suddenly widened. “Or do you not like it? I thought you liked roast beef, but maybe I was wrong.”

  He smiled, and her expression relaxed. “What man doesn’t like roast beef?”

  “Oh, gut. I had this horrible feeling you were stalling because you don’t like it but you didn’t want to hurt my feelings.” She popped a chip into her mouth.

  “So how have you been?” He took a drink of iced tea.

  “I’ve been fine. My family is gut too. We’ve all been thinking of you, which is why Nathan and I brought food over.”

  “Nathan is here too?”

  “Ya, he’s talking to Brody and Leon.” She gestured toward the doorway. “He should be back to see you in a few minutes. Has it been busy today?”

  He shook his head as he finished chewing and swallowing another bite of the sandwich. “No, we were doing some training this morning. I was just resting this afternoon.” He took another bite.

  She took a few more chips and then looked up at him. “You look like you need the rest. I’m sure you haven’t been sleeping well.”

  “No, I haven’t.” He wiped his mouth with the napkin. “This sandwich is appeditlich, especially since you didn’t throw it at me.”

  She laughed and her cheeks flushed bright pink. When she stopped laughing, her eyes locked with his and something in the air shifted between them. The urge to hold on to her friendship grabbed him by his shoulders and shook him.

  I need Kayla in my life. I can’t lose her.

  The thought was so sudden he swallowed a gasp. What was happening to him?

  Nathan appeared in the doorway and gave Jamie a little wave. “Hi, Jamie. Wie geht’s?” He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against the doorframe.

  Jamie shook himself from his thoughts and forced his lips to form a smile. “I’m managing. How are you?”

  “Gut, gut.” Nathan shrugged.

  Kayla turned to meet her brother’s gaze. “Is it time to go already?”

  “Ya.” Nathan jammed his thumb toward the kitchen. “We need to get going so we can get ready before the late afternoon crowd comes. Eva can’t do it alone.”

  “I know.” When she faced Jamie again, a frown had clouded her pretty face. “I feel like I just got here. I hate that I have to go.”

  “I know.” Jamie placed the plate on the table next to his chair. “I appreciate the visit and the food. Danki for coming to see me.”

  “Gern gschehne.” She stood. “You make sure you finish that sandwich.”

  “Kay,” Nathan said with a groan. “He’s not your little bruder. He’ll decide what he wants to eat.”

  She bit her lower lip. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to order you around.”

  “Don’t let her kid you,” Nathan muttered. “She’s very good at giving orders.”

  “Nathan!” she gasped. “That isn’t nice.”

  Jamie stifled a snicker. “It’s fine. I have schweschdere, so I understand. And, honestly, I appreciate the concern.”

  “We need to get going.” Nathan stepped into the room. “Take care.”

  “Thanks for stopping by.” Jamie stood and shook his hand.

  “Gern gschehne.” Nathan walked to the doorway and tapped the doorframe. “I’ll meet you outside, Kay.”

  “All right. I’ll be right there.” After Nathan disap
peared into the hallway, she shook her head. “I’m so sorry. He can be so rude with his comments. I hope that didn’t offend you.”

  “No, it didn’t offend me. I have younger siblings, remember?” He held out his hand, and she took it. But instead of shaking her hand, he held it, enjoying the intimacy of her touch. “I’d like to see you again.”

  She nodded. “I would like that very much.”

  “Great.” He released her hand. “Have a gut afternoon.”

  “You too.” She smiled and left.

  Kayla felt as if she were walking on a cloud. She said good-bye to Brody and Leon and then followed Nathan out to the sidewalk. Her thoughts were spinning with excitement after her conversation with Jamie. While her heart broke for him and his family, it swelled with the possibility of getting to know him better. Her breath had caught in her throat at the intensity in his eyes when he told her he wanted to see her again. Surely that meant he liked her.

  Her lungs seized with a mixture of betrayal, worry, and alarm as a memory surfaced. Abram arrived late one night to see her, and after spending an hour talking on the porch, she walked him to his buggy. She expected to receive his usual quick kiss goodbye, but when she leaned in, he moved away and put his arm up to halt her.

  “We were just being freinden tonight, Kayla.” Then he shook her hand, said good night, and climbed into his buggy. As he disappeared into the night, his rejection crushed her heart and her spirit, stealing her confidence in its painful wake. Not long after that, he broke up with her.

  Would Jamie play with her heart the same way Abram had?

  “Hello? Kayla?”

  Her gaze snapped to her brother’s puzzled expression as they walked down the block toward the restaurant.

  “You didn’t hear a word I said, did you?” He raised his eyebrows.

  “I’m sorry. What were you saying?” She tried her best to hide her embarrassment.

  He stopped walking and swiveled toward her. “You really like him, don’t you?”

  She pressed her lips together. “Please don’t tease me. I’m not in the mood.” She started walking again, and he grabbed her arm, tugging her back.

  “I’m not teasing you.” His smile seemed genuine. “I think it’s great. Jamie is really nice. I’m glad you’re not still hung up on Abram.”

  She cringed at the sound of her ex-boyfriend’s name. “We need to go. I’m sure Mamm and Dat are anxious for us to get back to work. You know how busy it gets.”

  “Really, Kay. I think it’s wunderbaar how you’ve both moved on.”

  “Who’s moved on? Abram?”

  “Ya. I heard your freinden Katie and Lillian talking about him when they stopped by for lunch yesterday.”

  “What did they say?” Try as she might, Kayla couldn’t stop a blush from creeping up her face. She could feel it.

  “They mentioned he was seeing someone. Who was it?” He snapped his fingers. “That’s right. Bena Smoker.”

  She cringed. “Bena Smoker?” She wasn’t Abram’s type at all.

  She started walking again in an attempt to leave any thoughts of Abram there on the sidewalk. “We’ve already been gone too long. Let’s go.”

  Before Nathan could respond, Kayla hurried to the restaurant and slipped in the front door. She redirected her thoughts to Jamie and his family as she crossed the dining area. Eva was setting a sandwich platter in front of a customer, but then she hurried over to Kayla and walked with her to the kitchen. Nathan was right behind them.

  “Did you get to talk to Brody?” Mamm asked as they came in.

  “Ya, we did.” Nathan crossed the room and began to pull on his apron. “Brody and Leon appreciated the food.”

  “Did you get an update on the Riehl family?” Eva asked.

  “Ya.” Kayla rested her hand on the counter. “I actually got to see Jamie.” She summarized what he shared about his family, leaving out the personal information about his strained relationship with Cindy.

  Her parents and Eva listened as frowns darkened their expressions.

  “I’ve been keeping the family in my prayers.” Mamm’s eyes shimmered. “I’m so sorry for all they’re going through.”

  “Ya, I am too.” Dat patted Mamm’s arm. “It has to be difficult for Vernon. I’m sure he feels lost right now.”

  Kayla folded her arms over her chest as an idea took root in her mind. “I was thinking maybe Eva and I could take them a meal.”

  “Ya.” Eva snapped her fingers. “I love that idea.”

  “I do too,” Mamm chimed in. “We can come up with a nice menu, and I’ll take care of Junior for you.”

  “Great.” Kayla rubbed her hands together. “If it’s okay with them, let’s take the meal to them tomorrow night.”

  Kayla’s stomach flip-flopped. She was going to see Jamie again. And soon.

  SEVENTEEN

  Later that evening Jamie climbed from the fire truck and secured his helmet. Red strobe lights reflected off the slate-gray paint on the small house as smoke poured out of the right-side windows. A petite woman who looked to be in her mid-thirties stood on the dark front lawn in jeans and a light-blue T-shirt. She was coughing into a dish towel.

  Jamie rushed to her and then glanced over his shoulder in search of the ambulance. Where is it? It should be here by now!

  “Ma’am, are you okay?”

  She nodded as she continued to cough. Her eyes were bloodshot and tears streaked down her pale cheeks. After a moment, she caught her breath and wiped her face with the towel.

  “Thank you for coming so quickly.” She pointed toward the house, her hand shaking. “I was warming up some soup, and I fell asleep. When I woke up, the house was full of smoke.”

  “Is there anyone else in the house, ma’am?” he asked.

  The woman shook her head. “No, my husband is out of town.”

  “Any pets?” he asked as Leon appeared beside him.

  She shook her head. “No. No one else and no pets.”

  “Brody’s handling the scene size-up. I’ll let him know,” Leon offered before jogging over to the truck where Brody was speaking into his radio.

  “All right.” Jamie opened his mouth to speak to the woman but stopped as the blare of sirens filled the air. She wouldn’t be able to hear him.

  An ambulance and the Ronks Fire engine parked beside the Bird-in-Hand truck.

  “There’s the ambulance.”

  The woman began to cough again, and when she swayed Jamie grabbed her arms and held her upright. Her body wilted in his arms.

  He turned toward the ambulance. “Could I get some help, please?”

  Two paramedics jumped out and took a gurney from the back of their vehicle.

  “They’re going to help you, ma’am.” Jamie held her steady.

  The paramedics brought the gurney, and Jamie helped the woman lie down. Then the paramedics took her to the ambulance.

  “Is she all right?” Leon asked as he returned.

  “I think she has smoke inhalation.” Jamie pointed toward the house. “Are we going to go in?”

  Leon gestured toward the Ronks company as four men in turnout gear walked over to them. “Ya. I think they’re going to stay and see if we need any help, though, since Noah’s not on duty tonight. It’s just you, me, and Brody.”

  “Sounds gut.” Jamie greeted the four firemen, and then Brody approached the group.

  “All right. Two in and two out. Who wants to go in first?”

  Leon smacked Jamie’s arm. “We’ll do it, right, Jamie?”

  “Ya.” Jamie put his mask over his face. “Let’s go.” As he turned toward the house, he spotted a flash of metal, a reflective vest, and a small light that resembled a lantern moving near the road.

  “Jamie?” Leon asked.

  “Look there.” Jamie nodded toward the road. “It looks like someone on a scooter.”

  Leon nodded slowly. “Why would someone be out on a scooter in the dark?”

  “Are you two going in o
r what?” Brody snapped.

  “We’ll go,” one of the firemen from Ronks said, turning to another. “You ready, Cooper?”

  “Yeah.” Cooper put his mask on and started toward the house.

  The chief from the other station walked over to Brody and began to discuss the scene. Jamie started toward the road.

  “Where are you going?” Leon hurried after him.

  “I’m going to tell this person he’s going to get hit by a car if he continues to ride his scooter outside in the dark. It’s dangerous to ride a scooter at night, even if you have on a reflective vest and carry a lantern.”

  As Jamie approached the road, the scooter steered into the driveway.

  “Jamie?” the rider asked as he steered the scooter over to him and Leon.

  “Nathan?” Jamie couldn’t believe his eyes. “What are you doing here?”

  “I heard the call, and I thought I’d come in case you need extra help.” Nathan lifted a radio from the basket on the front of the scooter. Then he pointed behind him. “I don’t live far from here. I figured I’d head over and check things out.”

  “Where did you get that radio?” Jamie asked.

  “It was Simeon’s,” Leon answered for Nathan. “Brody let him keep it as a memento.”

  Jamie’s shoulders tensed.

  “I just want to help.” Nathan pointed toward the house. “I thought since I live close—”

  “Are you saying you often go on calls close to your haus?” Jamie couldn’t keep his voice from rising with alarm.

  “No!” Nathan shook his head, looking surprised at the question. “This is the first time.”

  “Are you telling me the truth?”

  “Ya.” Nathan nodded with emphasis.

  Jamie jammed his thumb toward the Ronks fire engine. “So if I ask the Ronks chief, he won’t tell me you’ve been coming to scenes to offer your help?”

  “No, he won’t. This is the first time.” Nathan took a step back. “I’ll just go back home.”

  “No, don’t go back out on that road. It’s too dark. I don’t want you to get hit.” Jamie gestured toward his station’s fire engine. “You can wait in the truck. We’ll take you home when we’re done here.”