Tales of the Crazy

by Charles L Cole

  A couple of days later, she texted me, and we set a time to meet. But then she had to cancel due to a family situation. I wondered if the situation was real or if she didn’t want to face me. She called and texted me a couple of times about wanting to talk on the phone. I called her back, and it was a very short conversation.

  She claimed that she didn’t feel the way I did and wanted to be only friends. I was stunned. After everything she had said before, this was a sharp 180-degree turn. I told her that with everything she had told me about how she felt, this didn’t make sense. Why the sudden change? I was dumbfounded. She would not give me a straight answer. She went on about being friends, but I cut her off and said no. I could not be just friends. Her core being and inner beauty were too seductive to me. It was either all or nothing with her; there was no other option.

  My voice was trembling and cracking with hurt, and then I told her, “This is good-bye, Celia.” When she continued talking, I hung up. I’ve been around long enough to know that the let’s-just-be-friends situation never works.

  I spoke with my sister the day after being dumped, and Jane was upset over what had happened. She knew how happy I had been. I spoke openly about being fifty-six years old with no family of my own, no children, and no woman to love. Jane said how unfair it was for all this to happen to me while she saw so many other horrible and undeserving people getting everything I should have had. Jane was coming to Michigan in three weeks to visit the family, and she had been really looking forward to meeting Celia. She was disappointed that was not going to happen.

  I did a stupid thing shortly after being dumped. Celia knew I was writing this book, and I added a bunch of rambling about how I felt about her in this last chapter. I mailed it to her. Two weeks later I reread what I had written, and it sounded pathetic and weepy.

  Damn, that had been a huge mistake. Here is a hint: Never send any written correspondence to a woman when you are an emotional wreck. Especially after not being able to sleep and writing from eleven at night to four in the morning. The words you write are not really who you are; they’re just the heat of the moment, when emotions are raging. I deleted most of what I wrote about her for the final revision of this book.

  I went from being elated with life when I was with Celia to feeling sadness mixed with a bit of resentment with her gone. I also was angry at myself for opening up and trusting only to get hurt again; but I kept pushing on and did what it took to get happiness back in my life. No way am I ever going to sit around feeling sorry for myself. I have to remain aware of the blessings I have, not what I don’t have. There is so much to live for, and I will take advantage of all life has to offer. It took a while to get over Celia, but I did.

  A month after breaking up with Celia, I met a woman, chatted with her a couple of times, and was going to ask her out. She had moved here from England. I could tell she was interested, but I had some suspicions. Then I asked her, “Are you married?”

  She hesitated, looked down, and said yes.

  The first thought that entered my mind was, Cheater.

  She did not have a ring on and had never mentioned anything about having a husband. That confirmed my suspicions, and it sure seems that integrity is lost among many people today. I never spoke with her again and kept clear of any emotional entanglements with women for a while.

  In conclusion, when I pay the final spousal support payment to Jess on May 15, 2020, I will cut all ties and communication with her. I’ll effectively get an $1,800 per month raise. That sure will be nice. She recently moved to Alabama, so hopefully I won’t have the uncomfortable experience of meeting her again here in Michigan. I have forgiven her, but don’t trust her and don’t want her in any part of my life.

  Be very careful whom you marry. I don’t want anyone to experience what happened to me. Proverbs 31:10-12 states, “A wife of noble character who can find? She is worth far more than rubies. Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.”

  On the flip side, Proverbs 21:19 states, “Better to live in a desert than with a quarrelsome and nagging wife.”

  I know the harsh reality of the flip side to be true from firsthand experience.