Crazy Little Thing Called Love

by Jess Bryant

  He kissed her. Hard and heavy, on the lips with every ounce of hunger and need he’d ever felt inside him. The heat that was always simmering between them burst into a flash fire and there was no holding back. He wasn’t in control anymore, wasn’t in control of anything when it came to her. He had to touch her, couldn’t even begin to let her go again, never again.

  His heart beat too hard in his chest. Boom. Boom. Boom. His head answered with a call of its own. Mine. Mine. Mine. He’d never thought of himself as a possessive man but he knew in that instant she belonged with him. She was his.

  “Zach! No!” She shoved against his chest and he stumbled backwards again in a haze. “Stop it. I won’t let you hurt me anymore. I can’t.”

  He couldn’t get enough air in his lungs to make his brain work, “I’m not going to hurt you ever again.”

  “Yes, you will.” She shook her head, “You will if I let you but I won’t.”

  She was already turning away from him. They’d reached her car at some point during the fight. He hadn’t even realized it. The door locks beeped and she reached for the handle. He had a flashback to the first time he’d ever kissed her, ever touched her. She’d run away from him then too but he wouldn’t let her go this time. She was his.

  He shoved his hand against the door, slamming it back shut and she gasped and jumped back, “You said you loved me.”

  “I know what I said but I don’t want to love you anymore.” She tilted her face up and he froze.

  Tears streamed down her pretty cheeks. It was like a knife to his chest. It shocked him so much to see her cry that he took a step back. Bluebell never cried. She hadn’t cried when he took her home and ended their relationship. She hadn’t cried when she put her father in the ground.

  She hadn’t cried until now. He’d made her cry. He’d broken her.

  “Please stay away from me. I can’t love you. I can’t be around you until it goes away. Please just stop.”

  He was in such a state of shock that he didn’t reach for her again when she pulled the car door open and slipped inside. He couldn’t move, couldn’t think anything except that this was his fault. He’d hurt her, broken her down. He’d taken a strong woman and made her cry.

  His anger worked its way back to the surface and this time it was directed inward. Real rage, real anger, the kind that made him ball his fists and see spots. It was the kind of anger that couldn’t be calmed, wouldn’t be dispersed. He had to beat something up but the only one who deserved to be ripped apart was him.

  Blue looked around the master bedroom with a mix of sadness and appreciation. She was still in the process of moving her things into the big room. Arlene had taken care of getting rid of the hospital equipment but when she’d offered to get the oak furniture out of storage Blue hadn’t been able to say yes. She wouldn’t hold onto her loss like her father had, never moving forward. She might not need to keep moving physically but she had to emotionally.

  So she’d packed up her father’s things. Some of it was in storage. Some of it she’d donated to the Goodwill. Still other things lingered around her now. The vase she’d put the bluebell flowers in for him had been her mother’s and it now sat on her wrought iron nightstand. The photo of her parents on their wedding day was on her dresser. Her Daddy’s Carter bible was in a drawer as was her mother’s Montgomery belt.

  The old mixed with the new to create something better. She hoped that somewhere in heaven her parents could see it and that they’d smile at her changes. She was the best of both of them after all.

  Flipping the light off she went back downstairs to the office and sank into the worn in leather chair. The chair was definitely staying. So was the big wood desk that had a half dozen Montgomery members names carved into the space beneath. She’d add her Daddy’s to it soon and then her own.

  In the meantime, she took a deep breath and let her fingers fly over the keys. She’d always enjoyed writing and in the past few days she’d found it helped with her loneliness and with her grief. She had no idea what it would turn out to be.

  She’d never written fiction so she’d started with what she knew: the story of a stunning small town beauty and the ranch hand that had loved her. She’d never gotten the real story out of her father so she’d decided to make one of her own. It helped distract her, to fill up the moments when all she really wanted to do was hop in her car and drive over to the Triple Star and see if Zach wanted to go for a ride on a dusty back road.

  She couldn’t turn to Zach. Seeing him had been bad enough the night before and then everything had spiraled completely out of control. She’d fallen apart when he touched her and then he’d kissed her with all the need she had been sure he felt for her too but that had really just been wanting. He wanted her. He admitted it but that didn’t mean he loved her.

  It would have been so easy not to stay in reality. It would have been easy to let him kiss her, to let him touch her and take her. It would have been easy to make love to him but she’d known she was the only one it would have been lovemaking to and she liked herself too much to believe a lie that big. So she’d stopped him and gotten away in the nick of time.

  She’d run away from him again just like she’d run away from him that first night at Molly’s wedding. And oh he’d looked angry again, so angry. Except this time she knew how bad his rage could be, she’d seen it up close and she hadn’t been able to stop herself from offering him comfort.

  He was so big, so strong but that kind of anger ran deep and all she’d wanted to do was make it better for him. She hated that her heart wanted to hold out hope that because she’d been able to calm him with a word and a touch that she’d somehow helped. She hated that she hoped Riley had found him and kept him calm after she upset him all over again. She hated that she wanted to call and check on him so she punched the keys on the laptop too hard and let her frustrations pour into her much healthier distraction from her miserable life.

  The doorbell rang but she ignored it. Arlene would answer it and see who it was, probably Maddie coming to find out why she’d run out on their girls night. The doorbell rang again and she frowned as her fingers stopped moving on the keyboard.

  “Arlene?” She called.

  No response. She groaned and pulled herself out of the chair. The older woman had probably gone out to the bunkhouse to fix lunch. She padded barefoot to the front door and pulled it open with a welcoming smile that died on her lips the second she caught a glimpse of her visitor.

  Zach was standing on the front porch at Montgomery Oaks. Instead of his standard polo or pearl-snap shirt he wore only a slightly wrinkled gray t-shirt with his blue jeans, a Rangers baseball cap covered his head and shielded his eyes. It took her a second to realize it was exactly what he was wearing the first time she’d ever seen him.

  It’s what he’d been wearing when he pulled over onto the side of the road to help her with a flat tire and she’d wanted to jump him for being so big and strong and sexy. Her stomach knotted of its own accord and her feet itched to do just that now. She stood firm instead, even when he said her name in that gravel tinged voice that made her insides shaky.

  “Bluebell.”

  She glared at him, “What are you doing here Zach?”

  “Invite me in.”

  “No.”

  “Please.” He asked softly, “Please hear me out and then I’ll go.”

  She held firm. She shook her head. She was about to tell him just where he could go. She’d tried hearing him out last night and it had only confused everything more. She couldn’t let him into her house when she was struggling so hard to get him out of her heart. She was set on telling him all of that but when she opened her mouth to say the words he reached up and pulled the baseball cap off and what came out instead was a gasp.

  “Oh God…” She moved forward on pure instinct and her hand defied her by gliding across that rugged jaw line she knew so well to touch at the black and blue bruises marring his handsome face, “Zach what happened?
”

  “Please, invite me in.” His voice was low and he closed his eyes and gulped in air when she touched him.

  “I’m sorry. That probably hurt.” She immediately dropped her hand away and stepped back.

  His lids flew open and serious green eyes met hers, “No. It didn’t hurt I just… I can’t touch you yet. I need to say something. Please, invite me in.”

  Her brow furrowed but her traitorous body betrayed her again by stepping aside. He looked so serious. He looked broken. Something had happened and he’d come to her and as much as she wanted to turn her back on him to protect herself, he looked like he needed a friend and she still loved him too much to say no.

  He walked three steps into the house, turned and faced her as she shut the door behind them. She leaned against it and watched him warily. Her eyes tried to catalog if there was other damage but his hands seemed clean, only the giant swelling bruise around his left eye spoke to the violence she’d sensed behind his anger.

  “When you got in your car and left last night…” His hands clenched, “All I wanted to do was tear something apart. I was so angry, so angry I wanted to destroy something, kill something. I wanted to take it out on somebody for how awful I was feeling.”

  “Who’d you fight with?”

  “Myself mostly.” A small smile tugged at one corner of his mouth, “I knew I was the only one that deserved a beating because I was the one that hurt you so I went back to the ranch and goaded Devin into punching me.”

  Her mouth gaped open, “Your brother did that to you?”

  “Faster than I ever expected, I didn’t even see it coming. Turns out he’s been pretty pissed with me himself lately and I gave him an opening.” He snorted. “Guess the temper really is genetic.”

  “That’s… crazy.”

  “That’s brotherhood.” He shrugged, “Anyway, the point is, not even the pain in my head competes with the pain that is tearing me open from knowing I hurt you. I care about you Bluebell. I hate myself for hurting you.”

  Her heart gave a little leap but she chained it down. Saying he cared about her wasn’t the same as saying he loved her. She cared about lots of people that she didn’t love, some she barely liked. She couldn’t twist his words into something they weren’t.

  “When I saw you in the bar last night, all I wanted was to go back to the way things had been. I wanted to just pick up where we left off.”

  “We can’t.”

  “I know. I know that now.”

  “We were supposed to be a one-night stand. It was never supposed to get complicated.” She repeated the words he’d used when she made her all too important confession and prayed her voice didn’t waver.

  “It wasn’t one night though, it was two and then three and then longer and you were still there and I still wanted you there. I still want you. I didn’t want you to leave.”

  “Don’t.” She shook her head, “You know why I had to and you didn’t exactly fight me when you loaded me up in your truck, dropped me on the front porch and burned rubber the other direction.”

  “I know and I’m sorry for that too. I’m sorry for so many things. I’m sorry I lied to you about the ranch. I should have told you what I knew about your dad and…”

  “No. You shouldn’t have.” She held up her hand to stop him. “I thought about it and you were right. It wasn’t your place to say anything. My daddy should have told me. If that’s what you’re here to apologize for again… you don’t need to do it. You can go and your reputation of not lying to women will be intact.”

  “I’m not worried about my reputation.” He sighed heavily and twisted the baseball cap in his hands, “I’m sorry for making you cry last night.”

  “Oh…” She stared at the floor. She really wished he hadn’t seen that. She wished she’d been stronger, been able to hold them back but she’d shed tears for Zach far more easily than she’d ever shed them for any man other than her father.

  “I never wanted to be the reason you cried. I don’t ever want to make you cry again.”

  Her heart clenched and she had to stifle another round at his softness, at his goodness. He’d come to apologize again. He just kept apologizing and being the nice, sweet guy she was in love with. She had to get away from him.

  “Then you have to go, the only way I don’t cry over you anymore is if you give me some space to get over you. I told you that I just need some time and then we can be friends. It’ll be fine.” She backed up to the door and was just reaching for the knob when he spoke again.

  “I don’t want to be your friend Bluebell.”

  God he was trying to kill her. He’d already ripped her heart out. Now he wanted to dance on it?

  “I can’t be your friend because I’m in love with you.”

  She spun around from where she’d turned away from him so she could see his face, “What?”

  “I’m in love with you.” He took a deep breath, let it out, “I’m thirty-six years old and I fell in love for the first time and what I really hope is the last because I have this feeling I won’t ever be happy again if you don’t love me back.”

  She stared at him like he’d lost his mind and her hand came up to cover her gaping mouth, “Zach? Did I just hear you say that you’re in love with me?”

  “Yeah.” He nodded uncomfortably, “I did. I do. I just… I need you to say something. Say something but please God don’t say you’re sorry.”

  Her hand did a good job of covering the hint of a smile that tried to curl at her lips.

  “Please say you still love me Bluebell because I’m in love with you and I can’t bear to think of how pitifully awful my life would be if you weren’t in it. You drive me crazy. You frustrate the hell out of me sometimes but you also make me laugh and calm me down and make me feel whole and happy. I always knew my life was missing something. I thought it was freedom from the ranch and responsibility but it wasn’t, it was you. Please… say something.”

  “I love you too Zach. I didn’t mean for it to happen but you were there for me. You took care of me and let me lean on you and gave me everything I needed even when I didn’t know what it was I needed sometimes.”

  “I’ll always give you everything. I’ll always be there for you.”

  “And I’ll be there for you,” She lifted her hand and gently touched the bruise again, this time knowing his reaction came from needing her touch so badly, “I’ll be there for you so you don’t have to do everything alone. I’ll be there to calm you down and drive you crazy all over again.”

  “I like your kind of crazy Bluebell Montgomery Carter.” He smiled and tucked her hair behind her ear and gave her a light kiss on the lips. “I’m sorry I pushed you away that night. I was just scared because I had no idea what I was feeling. You were supposed to be like all the others so I reacted like I would have if you were one of them but you weren’t, not from the minute you accused me of being a serial killer and made me laugh and really feel for somebody other than my family for the first time in my life.”

  “Ax murderer.”

  “Huh?” His hands cupped her face, his thumbs stroking back to her ears in a torment that she’d missed more than she ever realized.

  “I accused you of being an ax murderer, not a serial killer.”

  “You just can’t help it can you? You have to correct me.” He grinned.

  “Yep.”

  “So damn frustrating.” He chuckled as his lips pressed against hers again.

  “You should stop talking to me then.”

  “Exactly.”

  He claimed her mouth in a deep, out of control kiss. He claimed her mouth and her body and her heart and her soul. She knew then that coming home wasn’t just about the land or the ranch or Montgomery Oaks. It wasn’t just about Fate or even Texas. It was also about Zach because with Zach, she was really and truly home.

  “Zach?” She whispered against his lips.

  “Still talking baby?” He nipped at her earlobe with a husky chuckle.
/>
  “When did you fall in love with me?”

  “As crazy as it sounds, as crazy as it feels, as crazy as it is…” He punctuated each statement with a kiss, “I think I fell in love with you the second I saw you in that ugly orange bridesmaid dress.”

  “You’re right, that is crazy.”

  About the Author

  Jess Bryant has always been a writer. As a little girl she spent hours in her room putting pen to paper and creating stories. She’s been reading and writing romance novels since she first stole a book from her aunt’s Harlequin collection when she was thirteen years old. She earned a degree in Public Relations from the University of Oklahoma and now lives in Dallas, Texas with her husband and two dogs. When she’s not writing, Jess can usually be found curled up with a glass of wine and a good book or yelling at the television during sporting events with friends and family. For more information on Jess and upcoming releases, contact her at JessBryantBooks@gmail.com.