Stuck on You

by Patricia Mar

“Are you still looking for news about his ex?” said Virginia, shaking her head and going through her whole repertoire of disapproving gestures.

  “They broke up six weeks ago, he told me himself.”

  “And so, Lady Paranoia? What do you care what she’s doing now?” Virginia let her head sink back into a big red cushion.

  “I need to understand – I want to see her.”

  “Sara, you’d better get a grip on yourself unless you want to see the end of this novel before you finish the first chapter.”

  “You don’t get it, he’s the three ‘t’s: tremendous, tempting and too much.”

  “Bingo!” exulted Virginia, throwing up her arms in triumph. “My sister’s head over heels!”

  “You look like Rocky after he ran up the stairs. Can you hear the music? Da da daaaaaaaaaaa, da da daaaaaaaaaaa!”

  “I’m like Rocky – a winner.”

  “You’re an idiot, that’s for sure!” laughed Sara.

  Virginia laughed too. “Sis, why don’t you try and just enjoy it? Just see how it goes. He said he likes you, don’t let your obsession for controlling everything ruin it. Life’s unpredictable anyway.”

  Her elbows on the desk, Sara put her face in her hands, staring at the PC monitor without really looking at it. “I’m scared I might lose control – and maybe I already have. I really like him and I can’t think about anything else. For example, I’ve got a really important interview at a lawyer’s office tomorrow, and yet here I am Googling this Tatiana, Svetlana, Delphine or whatever his ex’s name is.”

  Virginia snorted. “I didn’t want to show you this, but seeing as you’re making such a big deal out of it and I don’t want to spend the whole evening staring at your back…” Virginia went to her room and came back with a magazine and threw herself down on the sofa. Sara joined her immediately. Virginia started flicking through the pages until she found what she was looking for. “That’s her,” she said, pointing.

  Sara wilted, like a badly done soufflé. There she was, every woman’s nightmare, as beautiful and merciless as a killer Venus, wearing one of those improbable Golden Globe gowns that was so transparent it left practically nothing to the imagination. Her long black hair shone as though someone had sprinkled wax on it, and her feline eyes shone with charisma even in the photograph – and there he was by her side, dressed in a tuxedo, more handsome than ever and with a smile that said, “she’s mine and I’m glad she is.”

  “Sara, take a deep breath!” said Virginia, as she fanned her sister with the same magazine they had been reading. Sara didn’t move at first and just sat there staring, her eyes wide, but after a few moments of hesitation, she tore the magazine out of her sister’s hands and found the infuriating picture again.

  “Delphina McDougal, model, 22, born in Edinburgh, five foot ten, one of the most requested… She has worked for Armani, Dolce & Gabbana, Yves Saint Laurent. She’s Daniel Gant’s girlfriend… etc…”

  She went quiet, before muttering desperately “Do you get it now? It’s a mistake. I’ll never be like her.”

  “I agree!” burst out Virginia, grabbing a handful of popcorn and stuffing it into her mouth. “But let me remind you that Daniel is no longer seeing this bloody seven foot tall alien, even though she is as beautiful as Miss Universe. Which means she can’t be that special, right?”

  “What can he possibly think is special about me, Virginia? Come on. I’m a normal girl, with a normal life. Ok, I’m pretty, yes – but not pretty enough to make men turn round when I walk past or fall at my feet hoping I’ll walk all over them in my six inch heels.”

  “You’re starting to get boring. Would you rather I went out with Daniel instead?”

  “You side stepped the question, which isn’t very reassuring.”

  “Don’t you see that you’re trying to take an x-ray of a sensation? If he thinks you’re interesting it may not be important that you don’t have legs as long as a gazelle or eyes like a panther. Maybe – I’m saying maybe because I don’t know him personally – this guy is not just interested in looks. Maybe he’s looking for something deeper. And you should be more self-confident. I can hardly recognise you any more.”

  “I know, I’ve totally lost it.” Sara leaned her head back against the sofa. “I’m scared of being disappointed. I don’t want to kid myself, Virginia. Maybe the relationship with Carlo left a deeper mark than I thought. It made me insecure.”

  Her sister turned to look at her sympathetically. “I’ve been waiting for ages to see you so interested in someone… And I think that Daniel Gant is the jackpot. If I were you, I’d enjoy the moment without asking myself too many questions… you don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, nobody does. But you have the chance to go out with a man you like and who, my dear, you’ve totally lost your head over. Leave the problems for the future, for the moment just focus on how to win him over.”

  “You’re only saying all this because you secretly hope he’ll invite you to some VIP party,” said Sara, with a teasing smile.

  She knew her sister was right, but there was a part of her that was always ready to ruin things. “You know me better than I know myself, sis.”

  Virginia gave her a hug, followed by a loud slap on the back. “My big sister and Daniel Gant. There’s still some justice in this world then.”

  She released Sara and picked up the remote control. “Anyway, I’ve had enough of supermodels for one night. Time for a film! Chris Hemsworth, I’m all yours.”

  And Thor appeared on the screen.

  Chapter 13

  Desdemona

  Another failure. Sara De Michele was starting to think she was a lost cause. She might as well flush her degree down the toilet – her intelligence was being wasted on pointless job interviews, her bank account was dwindling away to nothing and her heart was in a mess over this all consuming new love interest. She couldn’t even honestly say she was sad about not getting the job, because the idea that he was going to call her made her too ecstatic to think straight. That man had such an insane and potentially dangerous effect on her! She was lowering all of her defences, on all fronts. Daniel was waiting for her surrender but she’d already surrendered on their first date, though he didn’t know it yet.

  With a black duster jacket over the suit she’d worn for the interview at Inside Look, she headed towards the metro. All she wanted was to go home and have a shower, and then she had to look for more jobs to apply for. She couldn’t give up, as the only alternatives were going back home, or worse – using Grandma Glicine’s savings. That really would be mortifying. She stopped for a moment at the metro entrance. People brushed past her, rushing up and down the stairs in a strange frenzy while she stood immobile. What would Daniel think? That she was a loser – a fraud, who wasn’t even able to find some sort of job.

  All her doubts returned suddenly to torture her. She wondered why she couldn’t just let herself go and seize the moment, forgetting all the stupid paranoia that made her sound like the tormented heroine of some crappy novel… She hated to admit that her sister and mother were right about her, although she wouldn’t have admitted that to them even under torture – she’d rather take her dark, unspeakable secrets to the grave with her! She was about to go down the stairs when she heard her phone ring. She pulled it out: call from Daniel Gant… Heart, calm down!

  “Hello, Daniel!”

  “Hi! So how did your interview go?”

  “If you have another question for me, please ask it now and spare me the humiliation of answering that,” she sighed, sadly.

  “Ok, I’ll give it a go: are you busy tonight?”

  “No, I’m not.”

  Keep it down, heart!

  “Great. Be ready at nine. Please wear that black sheath dress you wore for our first date, it’s perfect for the place I’m taking you to,” said Daniel, sounding very enthusiastic. What was he planning?

  “Not going to give me a clue?”

  “I want it to be a surprise.”r />
  Sara felt an irresistible desire to flirt, and gave in to it. She turned her brain off. “Are you planning to sweep me off my feet, Mr Gant?”

  “I’m trying to. I want to show you everything I like and involve you in my passions to the point where you have no choice but to want to get to know me better.” He was being serious and she had to swallow hard to keep her desire at bay. It only took him a nanosecond to tear down her defences.

  “I already want to get to know you better.” Ok, I said it. It’s not like there was any mystery about it, my stupid face says it all. “But you can still try. I think it’s funny.”

  “Stimulating? Intriguing?”

  “Let’s just say funny for now, we’ll see how it evolves.”

  “You’re a hard woman, but I’m going to find the key to your heart.”

  “If you find it you’ll have to take care of my heart – it’s quite fragile.”

  “I’ll look after it as though it were my own!”

  *

  She had done her hair with a couple of Swarovski pins, leaving the points cheekily sticking out, and liked the way it looked. She was satisfied with what she saw in the mirror and even admired her own handiwork for a moment. She had taken good care with her make-up – it had taken almost half an hour, which was a personal record for her, who was usually just soap and water. Virginia appeared in a corner of the bathroom mirror and peered over her shoulder.

  “You’re a knockout.”

  “Do you really think so?”

  Sara looked at her sister hopefully. She wanted to impress him, she wanted it with all her heart.

  “You’re glowing, there’s a kind of aura around you that makes you irresistible. You must really like him.”

  Sara blushed lightly and turned to look at her sister. “Is it that obvious?”

  “I’m afraid so,” she confirmed, sweetly.

  Sara smiled uncertainly. “My plan was to be mysterious, but he’ll see right through me.”

  “I’m sure you’ll find plenty of ways to surprise him – you know how to use words. It’ll be fine.”

  Sara was picking up her bag and the black overcoat she had left on her bed when the intercom rang. The girls looked at each other excitedly, and went to answer together, both reaching for the intercom.

  “Let me.”

  “Make sure you tell him to come up,” whispered Virginia, hysterically.

  Sara took a deep breath and answered. “Daniel? I’ll be down in a moment.”

  “No, I’m coming to get you, like a perfect gentleman. Full service.”

  Sara put down the receiver. “Let me open the door,” implored Virginia, putting her hands together as though praying.

  “No! I’ve already told you, I don’t want to make him feel weird.”

  “I’ve already spoken to him on the phone, have you forgotten?”

  “No…”

  Daniel rang again, the doorbell this time. “Ok, fine… but make sure there’s a next time, or there’ll be consequences” said Virginia, sticking her tongue out at Sara, who smiled back at her and ran to the front door. She paused for a moment to put on a gentle smile and hide her emotion, then opened the door.

  He was a vision. Standing there in front of her in all his beauty, with a disarming smile and something edgy about him. He was wearing a grey suit and a white shirt, had a touch of stubble, and his hair was well combed, though some curls wouldn’t stay put. He looked splendid. Her heart, racing like a manic hamster on a wheel, wouldn’t slow down. Daniel leant down to give her a gentle, innocent kiss on the cheek. Was it his lips that were burning, or was her skin on fire? He leant back a little and gazed into her eyes. “You look enchanting.”

  He laid his hand on her cheek with a natural gesture, and his thumb slowly caressed the skin near her lips. Sara was lost, totally lost in him – in his face and in his hot but gentle touch. Daniel had taken over her brain. They weren’t a couple, they were nothing, but Sara wanted more. She demanded it. Fate had made her meet him, and she would hate herself if her obsessive, control freak behaviour ruined such an improbable and fabulous match. “Beauty is in the eyes of the beholder.”

  Daniel’s eyes shone for a moment as though lit by surprise and pleasure. “I love that saying.”

  Sara let herself break out in a huge, joyful smile. “I love reading.”

  “Me too, I always have a book or my Kindle with me when I’m on a journey. But we can talk more during the evening. Shall we go?”

  Without saying anything else, he took her overcoat and helped her into it, so slowly it almost seemed as if he was drawing it out. He couldn’t see that Sara was smiling at the idea of being so close to him. She closed the front door and let him lead her to his car. She observed him very carefully while his hands held the steering wheel. There was something inexplicably fascinating in the shadow which crossed that profile of his from time to time and then disappeared, freeing again those splendid features. Daniel asked about her job interview, but Sara preferred to joke about it, both to hide the embarrassment she felt over that new failure and because she was with him. As Virginia said, she knew how to use words, and it was her sense of humour that saved her.

  After a few minutes, Sara unexpectedly found herself at the famous Desdemona, which she’d heard so much about from Lia: it was a new club, partly outdoors and partly indoors, which hosted gigs from bands from all over the world. Her eyes carefully took in every detail of the place: the lights were somehow blueish and purple, the little tables dotted about, basic and modern, while on the stage at the far end of the room a band was setting up. A diligent waiter took them to the table Daniel had booked, and when they took their seats, Sara could barely hide her enthusiasm.

  “What a great idea!”

  “I’m happy you liked it. I hope you won’t change your mind after hearing what they play tonight.”

  “What is it?” She put her handbag on the table and leaned forward, looking at him with interest.

  “It’s Celtic music. Do you know anything about it?”

  Sara bit her lips and gave a smirk of fake sorrow. “I guess I didn’t pass the test!” she said with a smile.

  “You’ve got plenty of time to improve and get a better result.”

  “I feel like I’m under a microscope,” she said sarcastically.

  “So do I, but I don’t mind. I want you to study me and analyse me. I want you to see me.” Sara pulled a confused face.

  He sounded so honest when he said that sort of thing that she couldn’t help but wondering how he could possibly care so much when he barely even knew her.

  “Anyway, we were talking about Celtic music,” she said, changing the subject in an attempt to talk of less complicated things.

  Daniel curled his lips in a sarcastic smirk. “It originated in Northern Europe. It’s the traditional music of Celtic countries, like Ireland.”

  “I’m feeling so ignorant right now, I’ll have to make up for this.”

  “The band that’s playing tonight is amazing, I saw them once in Dublin. It was so cool.”

  Dublin… He had been to so many places. Her fabulous mood was constantly endangered by these vague feelings of inadequacy. She thought that one day she should talk to her internal saboteur and tell her that she was fired – nobody had ever requested her services.

  While the other customers took their places, they ordered drinks, Daniel nodded ‘hello’ to a couple of people and smiled at some others. Sara was trying to look at ease, and wondered if she was succeeding or just looking terribly pathetic. But Daniel seemed not to notice – on the contrary, he was talking as calmly as usual, while Sara felt she was being tested. She was getting paranoid again. Feeling a little bolder, she sipped her mojito and got ready for the gig. Daniel put his hand on her arm in a relaxed way while the lights went down in the hall and the stage lit up.

  A woman with flowing red hair dressed in a very long skirt took possession of the microphone and introduced the band. Sara was excited, and
grew even more so when Daniel moved his chair closer to hers. They were very close now, and it felt amazing. Every moment of that evening was turning into another ideal date. The third one. After so many pointless, irksome first dates with equally irksome men, this one was the consecration of a growing feeling. They smiled at each other as the melody began, slowing down time with its pleasing, tormented notes, the memory of a distant culture of heart breaking dignity. Sara found herself drawn to a world where that violin and that melodious voice echoed, bringing pure magic to life. A world that also contained Daniel, who was holding her hand. One song followed the other, leaving the audience in ecstasy.

  Sara found herself in tears without even realising it. She dried her eyes, trying not to draw attention to herself, but Daniel didn’t miss a trick and noticed every blink and smile. As the echo of the last song faded, Daniel moved his lips close to her ear and whispered, “Magnificent.”

  “Yes, really magnificent,” she admitted, emotionally.

  He smiled happily. “Not the music – you.”

  Almost unable to breathe, Sara turned to look at him, and their eyes became one. Daniel moved even closer and kissed her. Only for a moment, though, then he detached himself from her and smiled in that way Sara could never forget. Her heart lost its way for good. She was a castaway on an ocean without a compass and she’d lost control of the rudder – the waves were carrying her where they would, and she didn’t mind. She felt free to experience this adventure, to go anywhere Daniel took her. But if she kept staring at him so rapturously, Daniel would realise how far gone she was – and she wanted to keep that from him for a little longer, hidden in her heart, like a secret.

  The music was over. The lights came back on, the stage emptied and the typical chatter of a club took the place of the melody. Daniel and Sara started talking again, neither mentioning the kiss they had just exchanged.

  “I have to leave again in about three days.”

  “Ah,” was all Sara was able to say through her almost closed mouth. She had to remember that the situation she was living just then was not reality – reality was what was outside. Daniel was always travelling. She could hardly expect him to stay in Rome.