Touched By Him (The Untouched Series Book 3)

by Lilly Wilde

  Oh just great. It was the song that was playing after the first time he’d made love to me. Did he remember? I stole a glance at him. He was staring straight ahead, stone-faced. I reclined in the seat and a lone tear eased down my cheek as the memories of that special moment with him came rushing forward. It was a beautiful time, a time that was very much in contrast to the present.

  Chapter Six

  “Ohhh.” I felt like shit. Opening my eyes, I quickly snapped them shut, blocking out the unwanted brightness of the room. I cradled my head—it felt like a million needles were tapping on it all at once. I opened my eyes again, just enough, squinting, the black veil of my hair moving as I blinked. Reaching for the panel on the nightstand, my fingers fumbled over the buttons before finally locating the smaller one that controlled the drapes. Once the room darkened, I opened my eyes to the headache this day would include.

  “Ohhh. No.” I pressed my palm to my forehead to block the rush of hammers coming at it. Glancing at the clock display, I panicked when I noticed the late hour, realizing I hadn’t heard a peep from Lyric. I hurriedly grabbed the monitor and noticed it was off. I never turned it off. Had Aiden done that? Sitting up in bed a little faster than I should have, the room started to spin. As the swirling in my head started to slow, I eased out of bed and warily crept to the bathroom. This life didn’t agree with me. I needed to be out of this house. I needed to be away from Aiden.

  After a quick shower, I dressed and then flipped on the baby monitor. I hadn’t expected to see Aiden on the screen, but there he was, in the nursery with Lyric. I cringed at the thought of coming face to face with Aiden, especially after the recklessness of the last forty-eight hours. I’d postpone my time with Lyric until after I’d gotten something in my stomach to soak up the toxins of last night. Hopefully Aiden would have wandered off to some other part of the house by the time I’d finished. He’d been putting in a few hours a day at Raine Industries this week, so maybe he’d be out of the house altogether.

  I reached for the doorknob just as my phone rang, and was both nervous and excited to see Kellan’s name on the display. I’d been sending texts, pictures, and videos but we had yet to talk since that one phone call some weeks ago. Stepping into the sitting area, a sense of calm spread over me as I spoke to the man with whom I’d once planned to build a life.

  After a half hour of conversation, and with a promise to talk more often, I said goodbye to Kellan and ventured into the Raine’s massive kitchen, hoping to find a quick remedy for my drunken night. I loved this room, but then, who wouldn’t—it was a chef’s dream. Not that I was anything remotely close to a chef, but this kitchen invited you to at least try your hand at preparing fine cuisine.

  A large paneless window was to my right, and behind the sink, a short hall led to a dinette table—and it, too, was near a large open window. That was the spot I typically enjoyed meals without the Raine clan, and that was where I now saw Aiden. He was standing near the table, in conversation with Dianna. I looked on as Aiden gave her a hug and then turned to leave. He’d once told me he’d spent a lot of time in the kitchen as a child. He never did say who taught him to cook, just that it was one of the staff. I wondered if it had been Dianna.

  Darting behind one of the columns near the entrance, I watched as Aiden strolled out of the kitchen, waiting until he was out of sight before I entered. Dianna had taken a seat at the table near the window and she appeared deep in thought. What had she and Aiden discussed?

  Once she noticed me, her worried expression morphed into a smile. I returned the gesture as I stepped toward the refrigerator. I grabbed some eggs, coconut water, and fruit—hoping the article I’d read was accurate and that these foods would help with my hangover.

  I closed the door and there was Dianna. Damn, is she a ninja?

  “Hi, Dianna.”

  “Hello, Ms. Aria. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.” I frowned and she quickly asked, “What is it?”

  “It feels awkward having you refer to me so formally. Please call me Aria.”

  “Okay,” she said, smiling sweetly. “Aria it is.”

  “Thanks, Dianna.” After opening and closing a few cabinet doors, I located a pan, plate, and bowl and set them on the counter.

  “I could prepare the eggs, if you’d like,” she offered.

  “If you’re sure you don’t mind, that would be great.”

  “I don’t mind at all. Have a seat and drink your water.”

  Grateful and relieved, I went to the bar and took a seat as Dianna started breaking eggs.

  “Why did you sneak out a few minutes ago?” she asked.

  “You saw that, huh?”

  “Yes, I did.”

  I popped a grape in my mouth and reached for a knife to slice my apple. “It’s no secret that Aiden and I aren’t particularly amicable, so if I can avoid him, I do.”

  She pursed her lips and shook her head.

  “I know. I know,” I replied. I knew we couldn’t be effective parents if we continued behaving like scorned kids.

  “I don’t think you do,” she said.

  “I’m sorry. I don’t understand.”

  “Watching the two of you has been very upsetting. I’m sure Mr. Aiden expects me to say nothing, but I can’t sit back and watch you make a larger mess than you already have. You once asked me how long I’d known Mr. Aiden, and I told you since he was a child. What I didn’t tell you is that I was his nanny. Well, one of them.”

  That would explain the closeness I’d witnessed.

  “He’s spoken to me about you,” she said.

  “Has he?” I asked, surprised that he would speak to anyone other than attorneys about me at this point.

  “Yes, on several occasions and as much as I hate to break his confidence, this is one time I feel I should.”

  I took a sip of water and braced myself for whatever was coming. “Okay.”

  “Remember when he brought you and your sisters to the penthouse? He did that because he wanted to take care of you. He wanted to give you everything. He still does. He loves you Aria, but he’s been deeply hurt and he doesn’t know what to do with that type of pain. He’s never had to.” She added some milk and other ingredients to the eggs and started to whip them in a glass bowl.

  “How would you know this? Did he tell you?”

  “As much as he would allow himself to, yes. I don’t have any children of my own, and Aiden is as close as I’ll get to that. I was a significant part of his upbringing—doing things with him that I’d like to think I would have done with my kids. His mother—God bless her—she loves Aiden but she wasn’t around for some things that most mothers would be.”

  I’m not really surprised to hear that. Sienna is hard to figure out. “Did you teach him to cook?”

  A gentle smile appeared on her thin lips. “Yes. Mrs. Raine didn’t like that very much. She chastised him each time she caught him here, but the first chance he got, he was back, following me around, asking about this, that, and the other. I didn’t have the heart to send him away, so Mrs. Raine and I had conversations about it many times.” Dianna finished cooking the eggs, scooped them onto my plate, and passed it to me. “Aiden was such a curious handful. He grew up too fast. Being a part of this family exposed him to things that most would only imagine, but it also caused him to miss out on some important rites of passage that most young men take for granted. And the fact that he accelerated at such a high level academically, well, he didn’t have a chance to experience some parts of his childhood. He missed out on a great deal, such as how to handle crushes or heartbreak.”

  So did I, but that doesn’t give me the excuse to be an ass. “Dianna, Aiden can be very cold,” I said, as I pictured the night on the bedroom floor. Yes, I’d wanted it too, but it was more of a need. I hated being needy for him and I knew he felt the same. And he had become even more distant since then.

  “Ms. Aria…er, Aria, you’ve hurt him more than he’s ever been hurt by anyone. Quite hone
stly, I’m surprised he even agreed to have you live here. When he left to get Lyric, he knew you wouldn’t stand for your son living in Chicago without you, but he had no intention of allowing you to live anywhere on this estate or even get near Lyric without court-ordered supervision. So it may not seem like it, but he is trying.”

  “Court-ordered? Are you kidding me? I’m Lyric’s mother. No court would go along with something like that. Maybe he knew that and that’s why he changed his mind.”

  “I’m sure I don’t have to tell you who you’re dealing with here. Money and power afford him anything he wants, he knows that. So if he really wanted court-ordered supervision, don’t you think he’d have it?”

  I knew Aiden could be merciless. I’d witnessed him take over and discard companies—and people—without a second thought. Who was I to think I was exempt from that? Just the mother of his child!

  “Why would he go to such extremes? He wants to hurt me, Dianna. He wants to get back at me for something he feels I did to him. Thing is, I didn’t do anything with the intention of hurting him. I didn’t think he’d even want Lyric, so this take-all attitude is very confusing for me. And after what ‘being a Raine’ imposed on his life, what it stole from him, I didn’t want that life for Lyric. I also didn’t think he’d want kids after the incident with Nadia’s—”

  “With the baby he conceived with Nadia,” she concluded when I’d broken off.

  I didn’t think Aiden had told anyone about that. Nadia Lane was Aiden’s ex-girlfriend. I’d had the pleasure of running into her on a few occasions last year. It was easy to see that she still had a thing for Aiden…a thing he’d encouraged a time or two. She was also a close family friend which meant she was as much of a fixture in his life as I was now.

  My face must have shown my surprise, because she replied to my thoughts. “He told me. But not until after he’d learned of Lyric.”

  “Dianna, I didn’t make my decision lightly. I considered every possibility. In the end, the thought of Lyric being raised like this, like Aiden was raised…I couldn’t do it. I made the only choice I felt I could.”

  “Now you know different.”

  “Not really. Aiden and I have yet to really talk. I have to admit, I do see the love he has for Lyric, but as far as I can tell, his actions are all about hurt, control, and retribution.”

  “Hurt is involved on both sides. But it’s much more than that, Aria.”

  I swallowed a forkful of eggs as she continued.

  “I think a talk would do you both good.”

  “Did you tell him that?” I asked.

  “I did.”

  “And?”

  She frowned.

  I knew that meant he’d refused. “He didn’t budge. Did he?” Although I expected as much, it was a little disheartening to know that my expectations were correct.

  Dianna placed the pan in the sink and poured a cup of coffee for herself. “Do you think maybe you could be the one to approach him?”

  Uh…no! He’s just as capable of initiating a peaceful resolve as I am. And since this current plight was all of his doing, why should I endeavor to mend a wound that would never heal? I continued eating and then took a sip of water.

  Dianna took a seat across from me. “He’s very stubborn. And he’s been so grouchy—even more so now that you’re in the house.”

  “So why would I want to walk headfirst into that, Dianna?”

  “Because someone needs to do something. Because you’ll all be the better for it. You made him happier than I’d ever seen him, and now that you have a chance to be a family, it could be the start of a wonderful life for the three of you.”

  “Why would you think he’d want that?”

  She took a sip of her coffee and studied me. “Why would you think he wouldn’t?”

  The question shook me more than I wanted to let show. After watching Aiden with Lyric and seeing the love he had for his son, I didn’t know what to think anymore.

  “He’s used to getting what he wants; you haven’t exactly given him that. You’ve given him what he never knew he wanted,” she said.

  “Even before Lyric, I’d once thought the same about Aiden—that he’d given me something I never knew I wanted. But that seems like such a long time ago.”

  “But you still love him. I can see it, even behind the anger. Talk to him. I mean really talk to him. You two can get past this.”

  If getting past it would mean I could take my son and leave without the fear of being prosecuted in court, yes, I want to get past it.

  “Aiden’s very headstrong. When he sets his mind on a course, he tends to stick with it—no matter the consequence. That may serve him well with work, or maybe even with his family, but not with you. He’s as unhappy with this as you are.”

  Maybe it should have, but Dianna’s talk did little to change my view of Aiden. The way he was treating me, in my opinion, was inexcusable. Granted, he had every right to be upset and hurt, but why perpetuate the hurt? That didn’t serve any purpose.

  Once I’d finished breakfast, I thanked Dianna for the talk and went upstairs to spend time with the baby. I was relieved to see Aiden wasn’t there, thus allowing for some alone time with Lyric. I laid a large blanket on the floor and then placed the musical play gym above his head and watched him revel in the sounds and colors. After seeing his reactions, I pulled out my phone to record him. This would be my next blog post and I’d also send a copy to Kellan and my sisters.

  Lia and Bianca would be here next month for Thanksgiving—I couldn’t wait to see them. I think I needed to see them, to be close to people I was actually on good terms with. I was also anxious for them to spend time with Lyric. It would be their first time seeing him in person since he was born. It definitely wasn’t the Thanksgiving I’d envisioned when we’d first made plans for the holiday, but it’s the one we’d have.

  An hour or so later, the attorney to whom I’d been referred called and totally blew my hopes out of the water. He explained there was a substantial chance Aiden could obtain sole custody and I would be awarded visitation. I strongly suspected he didn’t want to go up against the Raines, because he’d been pretty confident that I’d be granted shared custody until I mentioned the name of the father.

  Angry tears streamed down my cheeks as the painful reality set in. I was powerless—I no longer had control over my life. Aiden had taken that away from me—the one thing which had enabled me to protect myself, to avoid becoming someone I didn’t want to be. Yes, I’d relinquished some control when I’d found myself falling for him, but this was different. This was just cruel, and it wasn’t something I knew how to handle.

  I remembered Aiden’s nonchalance regarding my “day in court”. He hadn’t shown one ounce of worry over possible shared custody, because there wasn’t a need to. His position was firm—he could have paid off or bargained with any judge. I slammed my phone down on the nightstand. I was furious. No. More than that. This did something to me that I couldn’t articulate. It corrupted the core of who I thought I was—of who I’d fought to be. Resisting the need to lash out and trash the room, I buried my face in the pillow and screamed, releasing the rage I’d internalized since Aiden had appeared in Belize and bulldozed his way back into my life.

  I didn’t see the point in seeking second opinions because I knew every attorney would say the same thing once they knew the battle involved Aiden Raine. Obviously the best solution was one in which Aiden and I could reach a resolution without involving attorneys. So there wouldn’t be a court battle. But now what? How could I get Aiden to agree to something that worked for both of us? He couldn’t be upset forever, could he? It had been almost three weeks, and there were no signs of his backing down, but if Dianna was correct, I had to cling to the hope that in time, we would be able to reach a mutual decision.

  Thankfully, the remainder of the day was uneventful. I spent time with Lyric and then time in my room, updating my blog and watching TV. I’d recovered from my hangover
, and Aiden and I never crossed paths.

  As I was getting ready for bed, Allison stopped by to check on me and apologized for calling Aiden during our girls’ night. She looked so contrite that I quickly forgave her and invited her in while I finished getting ready for bed. She followed me to the sitting area and plopped down on the sofa beside me.

  After a moment of watching me, she said, “You two need to talk. You know, he wouldn’t have come to get you, or gotten so upset, if he didn’t care about you.”

  “Allison, whatever Aiden felt for me is gone.”

  “If you think that, you’re crazy. Aiden is just as miserable as you are.”

  “Somehow I doubt that.”

  “Aria, he loves you.”

  “This isn’t anyone’s version of love.” I went to the bathroom to wash my face and she trailed behind me, still pleading Aiden’s case.

  “Remember when I first met you? Didn’t it seem odd that I was so excited about him having a girl with him?”

  I had been so caught up in my own weird vortex that I didn’t pay much attention to the oddity of Allison’s reaction to seeing me with her brother.

  “Aiden doesn’t do that. When he’s working, especially inside one of Dad’s companies, he doesn’t break character. He’s there to work and that’s it. So for him to have you at the penthouse—that meant he was into you. I mean really into you.”

  I hadn’t believed him when he’d told me that. I had found it hard to believe he was single—that he didn’t have an active sex life.

  “Aiden joked that he was my favorite sibling and I played it off, but he really is,” Allison said, as she picked through some of the facial products on the vanity. “I mean, I love Nick and Sloan, but they’re different from Aiden and me. They get off on Raine Industries. It’s their thing, but it’s not for Aiden or for me. The only difference is Aiden goes along with it because he feels it’s his obligation to the family. We all know it and Mom and Dad use that to their advantage.”

  I didn’t want to hear about Aiden and the Raine family drama, so I went about my business as though it was no big deal, but I was taking in every word. I applied some of the scrub to my face and grabbed the facial brush as she continued.