Keep the Home Fires Burning

by Anne Bennett

They were still despondent and in the end, Bill with a glance across the table to Marion, said, ‘How about if tomorrow is fine we all take off to Sutton Park for the day?’

  ‘Where’s Sutton Park?’ Tony asked.

  ‘A really big place a bit of a distance from here,’ Bill said. ‘I’ve not been there very often myself, to tell you the truth.’

  ‘I remember it,’ Sarah said. ‘You and Mom took me and Richard before Tony was born. It’s got big lakes in it, and it’s so huge that rich people used to drive round it in their cars. You’ll have to go on the train, or at least that’s how we went.’

  The twins were speechless with excitement and their eyes danced as Tony cried, ‘A train? Oh boy! We’re going on a train.’

  Bill smiled at Tony’s awestruck tones. ‘I take it that meets with your approval?’

  ‘You bet,’ Tony said, and Magda and Missie nodded vigorously.

  ‘We could take a picnic. What d’you say, Marion?’

  Marion hated disappointing the children but taking off for the day like that was such an alien thing for her to do that she found herself saying, ‘Don’t be silly, Bill. I can’t do that.’

  ‘Course you can,’ Bill said. ‘What’s stopping you?’

  ‘Well, I have things to do and—‘

  ‘Please don’t worry about us, Marion,’ Violet said. ‘We are all big enough to look after ourselves. I would go while you have the chance.’

  ‘Oh, go on, Mum,’ Sarah said. ‘It will do you good. Don’t you think so, Richard?’

  ‘I’ll say,’ Richard said. ‘You’ll have a great time. I remember I loved that park. I only wish I could come too.’

  ‘We can ask your Poll along,’ Bill said, seeing that Marion was wavering, ‘and she can bring Orla and Jack.’

  ‘Oh, yippee!’ Tony said, punching the air with his fists. Magda cast her eyes to the ceiling and everyone burst out laughing. Through the laughter, though, Marion saw Bill’s eyes and she guessed he wanted this day to hold as a memory to take with him when he left them again. How could she deny him that?

  The magic of that day was helped by the weather. The sun shone on them from a bright blue sky as they walked to the station. The children were so excited because none of them had ever been on a train before and the amazement on their faces when that little train puffed into the station with a hiss of steam brought smiles to the three adults’ faces.

  They loved the journey, especially when it reached the open countryside, and they crowded against the long window pointing things out one to another. They had seen plenty of things growing since the war began, though, in addition to their granddad’s allotment, because parts of parks and ornamental gardens had been given over to growing food. However, the children had never seen cows placidly chewing the cud, horses gazing at the passing train over a five-barred gate or galloping in the fields, and sheep relentlessly tugging at the grass, and they were enchanted by it all.

  ‘Oh, I wish it was a longer journey,’ Orla said when Bill told them the next stop was theirs.

  ‘Me too in a way,’ Magda agreed. ‘But I want to see this park as well.’

  ‘Why haven’t we ever come before?’ Tony said, as train pulled into the little station.

  Before Bill or Marion had a chance to answer, Jack said, ‘Why worry? We’re going now, ain’t we? And we’ve got the train journey back to look forward to as well.’

  At the bottom of a little hill that led down from the station, was a shop selling an assortment of goods. Bill went in and bought each child a net on a rod.

  ‘What’s it for?’ Tony asked.

  ‘What does it look like it’s for?’ Bill said, leading the way towards the Park gates. ‘It’s for catching tiddlers, and anything else you may find in the river. We’ve brought a couple of jam jars with us.’

  ‘Are tiddlers fish?’ Magda asked. ‘Proper fish.’

  Bill smiled, ‘If you find any real fish in the streams of Sutton Park then I’m a Dutchman, Magda, and anyway, you’d never catch them with nets like these. But you might catch other things and when you’ve had a good look at them in the jam jar we’ll let them go again.’

  ‘Good,’ said Missie. ‘I don’t like killing things.’

  ‘Well, there’s no need to do that.’

  ‘Let’s not talk about killing,’ Polly said. ‘There’s enough talk about that all around us as it is. Let’s have one day when we can try and forget the blooming war and everything about it.’

  ‘Hear, hear,’ Marion said heartily. ‘Let’s just concentrate on enjoying ourselves.’

  They were surprised that they had to pay to go into a park.

  ‘Sutton Coldfield is a separate town from Birmingham, but if we lived here we wouldn’t have to pay anything,’ Bill explained.

  ‘Oh, look at the playground,’ Magda cried, as they went through the gate. ‘Come on, Missie. Let’s see if we can grab a swing.’

  Marion, Bill and Polly watched the twins pounding across the grass with Tony, Jack and even Orla in hot pursuit. ‘They’ll be lucky,’ Marion said. ‘They’ll have to stand in a queue with everyone else.’ Many people had taken advantage of the good weather and the park was packed.

  When the children had finished in the playground there were the streams to paddle in and fish with their nets. They were exhilarated when they managed to catch a wriggling tiddler to tip into one of the jam jars. In the woods, the girls explored the many paths and collected leaves and pine cones while Tony and Jack found numerous trees to climb before they sat down to devour the picnic that Polly and Marion had spread on tablecloths laid on the grass.

  After they had all eaten their fill, Polly and Marion tidied up and lay down for a little snooze while Bill took the children around to see the lakes, though a fair bit of the park was out of bounds: some of it cultivated, and a large area given over to the army. When they returned to the woods Bills organised the children in a game of hide-and-seek.

  They returned home tired, grubby, sun-kissed and very happy. Marion knew it was a day she would always remember. To put the icing on the cake, the chippy they passed on their way home from the train station had fish in, though the queue was out of the door, but they joined it anyway and they were all able to enjoy a fish and chip supper when they got in.

  However, barely had the last chip been eaten than the first explosions were heard in the distance. There was a collective groan and Marion exclaimed, ‘Bloody hell! We have this to contend with now. We’ve had such a wonderful day and this seems to taint it.’

  ‘No,’ Bill said, ‘nothing could do that. Anyway, this might just be a skirmish, but we’d better not take chances. Come on down the cellar.’

  Everyone was reluctant but no one refused.

  As they were descending the steps Peggy said, ‘I’d like to know where those blooming sirens are.’

  ‘So would I,’ Marion said. ‘Our Polly said that when she came up the entry the other day to go to the public shelters in Aston Park, she spotted a policeman riding up the Lichfield Road on a bike and ringing a bell.’

  ‘Doesn’t hit you with the same sense of urgency somehow, does it?’ Violet said, and Marion had to agree.

  It was three and a half hours later before they heard the all clear. Again, none of the explosions had come that close. The children were so tired by then that they could barely keep their eyes open. Marion and Bill were also feeling the effects of that long day and they went to bed not long after the children.

  Marion lay cuddled against Bill and wished that she could stop time. She also wished she could love Bill as she longed to do, but she knew he wouldn’t allow himself to do anything that might be potentially harmful to her. She gave an almost involuntary sob, and Bill leaned over and kissed the salt tears from her cheeks.

  ‘Marion,’ he said, ‘I love you with all my heart and soul, and I would really like to show you how much, but …’

  ‘Hush,’ Marion said. ‘It isn’t that, not totally that, anyroad. It’s just that when
you’re gone and in the thick of it again, I’ll worry about you so much. I know that you’re a brave man, Bill, but don’t be too brave, will you? I want a live husband to come back to me, not a dead hero.’

  ‘Don’t fret yourself,’ Bill said, and he gave Marion a reassuring squeeze. ‘I intend to come back in one piece. I have too much to lose to want to throw my life away.’

  Everyone got up to see Bill off the day he had to report back to Thorpe Street Barracks, even the lodgers. Marion had promised herself she wouldn’t cry because it only made it more difficult for Bill. It was hard to remain stoical, though, with the children so upset. Magda and Missie were crying in earnest and Tony was pretending he wasn’t, while unshed tears also glittered in Sarah and Richard’s eyes. Even Peggy and Violet were a bit sniffy.

  Bill wrapped his arms around his two younger daughters and told them how much he loved them and would miss them, but that only made them cry the louder. Then he hugged Tony and Richard, saying to his eldest son, ‘Right, son. You’re man of the house now and from what I have seen while I have been at home, I couldn’t leave the family in better hands.’

  Marion saw two tears seep out of Richard’s eyes and trickle down his cheeks at his father’s words.

  ‘Bye, Dad,’ he said huskily. ‘Look after yourself.’

  Then it was Sarah’s turn, and as Bill took her in his arms he noticed how much she had come to resemble her mother as she was growing up. He held his daughter tight and kissed her cheek as she said, ‘Bye, Dad, I ain’t half going to miss you.’

  ‘I’ll miss you too. All of you. Look after your mother.’

  ‘Ah, Dad, you don’t have to ask me that,’ Sarah said as she kissed his smooth cheek.

  Bill nodded and turned to Peggy and Violet, intending to shake them by the hand. However, he felt he had got to know them well in the time he had been home, and liked them both very much, and so he hugged them too.

  And then Sarah saw the look pass between her parents, and so did the others, and the lodgers, followed by Richard and more reluctantly Tony, made their way to the kitchen to give them a bit of privacy.

  At the door Magda protested strongly, ‘I want to say goodbye to Dad.’

  ‘You’ve said goodbye,’ Sarah said, firmly. ‘Now it’s Mom’s turn and she wants to say goodbye to Dad on her own.’

  Magda knew that when Sarah spoke in a certain way it was better to obey her and so allowed herself to be led into the kitchen, though she continued to grumble.

  The woebegone, hard-done-by look on her face made Marion and Bill smile. ‘There goes one very disgruntled lady,’ whispered Bill as the door closed and they were alone in the hall. ‘But how right they were to leave us alone because I want to do this,’ and he pulled Marion into his arms with a sigh. ‘I love you with everything in me,’ he said. ‘And I want you to promise me something?’

  ‘Anything?’

  ‘I want you to go to the cellar any time there is a raid, however far away it seems to be.’

  ‘I will, of course.’

  ‘Ah, that’s easy to say here and now,’ Bill said. ‘But what if the raid was to come in the middle of the night and you are warm and cozy and the children fast asleep in bed? You must get up and take shelter, even if you would rather turn over and forget it was happening. You are all very dear to me, and you most of all. Promise me?’ he demanded, looking deep in her eyes.

  ‘I promise,’ Marion said. ‘I’ve as much desire to keep us all safe as you have.’

  ‘That makes my heart easier,’ Bill said, and he drew Marion close once more. As they drew apart he lifted his kitbag onto his shoulder as he said, ‘Be there waiting when I come home again.’

  Marion couldn’t make any sort of reply, her throat was too tight, but she nodded as she opened the door and stood watching as Bill marched away, his back straight and resolute, she noticed, his strides firm and his boots ringing out against the cobbles. She felt proud of him, but was afraid for him too. He turned to wave at the corner and she drank in the last sight she would have of her beloved husband for a long long time. She went back in the house with a sigh, shut the door behind her and, leaning back against it, eventually gave way to the tears that she had bravely kept in check. But even those she scrubbed away before going in to face the family.

  Polly, knowing how Marion would be feeling, popped round to see her later that morning. ‘On your own?’ she said.

  ‘Except for Magda and Missie,’ Marion said, going into the kitchen to put the kettle on. ‘They’re in the garden. Tony set off to call for your Jack to go down the allotment. I thank God for that place, you know. It’s kept them both mischief free all summer and now it’s something for Tony to focus his mind on because he was very sad saying goodbye to his father this morning. The others are all at work so they have had no time to dwell on it either. I suppose you won’t say no to a cup of tea?’

  ‘I’d love a cup, if it won’t leave you short.’

  ‘No, I’m all right,’ Marion said as she set out the cups. ‘With the big ones out most days, the ration stretches quite well.’

  With the tea made the women sat either side of the kitchen table, their normal place for a good old gossip.

  ‘Everyone seems to be working their socks off at the moment,’ Polly remarked. ‘As Mary Ellen said, they don’t say you’ve got to do overtime but if you don’t half feel guilty if you say no.’

  ‘Richard, Peggy and Violet are the same,’ Marion said. ‘And they all like the extra money. In fact, Sarah is quite envious.’

  ‘Well, that Mrs Jenkins is known as a stingy cow.’

  ‘She is,’ Marion agreed. ‘And because of the way she is, when rationing was introduced I had no intention of registering her as my grocer. I wouldn’t give her that satisfaction.’

  ‘You want to get your Sarah shifted from there.’

  ‘I think she might shift herself when she’s sixteen,’ Marion said. ‘She keeps threatening to, anyroad, ‘cos it ain’t only the money. She feels she ain’t doing nothing for the war effort like everyone else in the house, especially Richard in this volunteer force. And talking of Richard,’ she said as she got to her feet, ‘I must hurry and get a bite ready for him at least. He don’t have long at home because there’s training this afternoon.’

  ‘That’s tough when he’s at work in the morning.’

  ‘Yeah,’ Marion agreed. ‘But he says that he isn’t the only one. He trains on Wednesday evening and Sunday morning, as well. Course, he’s missed Mass to do this and Father McIntyre came here on Tuesday to see the reason why. He didn’t seem to care when I said that he’d been training with the Home Guard. I didn’t dare tell Bill and I was very glad that he’d gone down to the allotment when Father McIntyre called because I think he would have given him short shrift, priest or not. Anyway Father McIntyre said that nothing should come before Richard’s immortal soul and he still had to go to Mass every Sunday regardless. The only one he can go to and still make the training is the half six Mass, and I will hate waking him that early, but I shall have to.’

  ‘Huh,’ said Polly. ‘You’d think that there would be some dispensation. You know, McIntyre might be one of the few people in Great Britain who might need to be reminded that there is a war on. Surely normal rules don’t apply?’

  ‘They do from where he’s standing.’

  ‘Bloody priests, they’re all the same.’

  ‘Polly!’ Marion said in mock horror. ‘Fancy cursing the clergy!’

  ‘They need cursing the way they prate on,’ Polly said. ‘God, it’s enough to make a saint swear.’

  Marion, with a laugh, gave her a sister a push. ‘And you are nothing like a saint.’

  ‘Too bloody right I’m not,’ Polly said with a definite nod. ‘All that holier-than-thou business would get you down. Not comfortable people to have around at all, I wouldn’t have thought.’ Heaving herself to her feet she said, ‘Just for now, though, I’d best get back to my lot, before they come looking for me. Shal
l I see if the twins want to come back up to our house for an hour or two? You know how we love having them.’

  ‘It would probably do them good,’ Marion said. ‘They went out with their skipping ropes, but when I looked out they was just sitting on the steps looking as miserable as sin.’

  It was the very best thing Polly could have done for the twins, for they were almost consumed with sadness. But they loved their aunt dearly, and also liked the fact that Aunt Polly didn’t have a garden so all of the kids from the yard and streets around would play together. They were never stopped from playing with anybody, not the girls who seemed to have a terribly itchy heads, or even the one with purple around her mouth because she had impetigo.

  Much later, as they walked home, Missie said, ‘I feel a bit guilty that after we got to Auntie Polly’s I didn’t think about Daddy, not once.’

  Magda knew exactly how her sister felt but she said, ‘I know, but I bet Daddy wouldn’t want us to be sad all the time. Remember if we were miserable or owt he used to always ask us what our long faces were about?’

  ‘Yeah …’

  ‘And he’s being really brave going off to war again when he was hurt the once already,’ Magda went on. ‘So I think that we have got to be just as brave and not keep on about missing him and that.’

  ‘Like Mommy says, “What can’t be cured must be endured”, ‘ Missie said.

  The indiscriminate raids and skirmishes went on, though none came very close to Aston. As soon as the crumps and crashes were heard Richard reported to the ARP headquarters, as the Home Guard commander had advised his men to do in the event of a raid to see if they could be of use. Everyone was soon complaining about the lack of warning sirens and the Evening Mail eventually printed details of how the system was supposed to work.

  Sarah read it out to the others. ‘Apparently the lookouts for the planes are volunteers from the Royal Observer Corps and they are based in 1, 400 bases nationwide,’ she said. ‘Then they relay information to Fighter Command and ARP Headquarters and that information is then sent to schools and factories where the sirens are placed.’