Survivor

by Mary Alford

  “We?” I asked.

  “You and I.”

  “Why do I need to go housing hunting with you?” Okay, so that probably wasn’t what a good assistant should say to her boss of less than a few hours, but it was an honest question. I didn’t want to go house hunting with him. The truth was, I didn’t like being close to Aaron. He was starting to get under my skin in the worst possible way, and I was finding it more than a little annoying.

  “Because you happen to be the only person I know in town whom I trust. I don’t know anything about Austin. I need your help. Surely, you won’t refuse a man in need. Besides, I promised you a car.”

  While Aaron might be smiling, I had little doubt he was serious about the car business, and I needed to set him straight. “I don’t need a car. I have a car already.”

  “Okay, so I need a car.”

  “Why don’t you just drive the car you have now?”

  “Because, my sweet, innocent, Grace, in New York I didn’t have much need for a car. A service picks me up each day. But here in Texas, well, I think I’m going to need one, don’t you?”

  “What are you thinking of getting? Something on the lines of a pickup truck, or maybe something bigger like an Excursion?”

  The image of Aaron, Mr. Oh So Suave, driving around in one of those monstrosities had me laughing until I caught his reaction. He wasn’t finding my little joke nearly as funny. There was something in his eyes I wasn’t prepared to define.

  “Probably not. I can’t see myself driving a truck or whatever that other thing is you mentioned, and judging from your amusement, I’m thinking you can’t either. Anyway, I doubt there will be time to do any car shopping tomorrow. We have a full day planned looking at houses. So, I’ll pick you up at your apartment in the morning at around eight. We have an appointment with the realtor soon after.”

  “How are you going to pick me up when you don’t have a car?” I actually managed to say those words with my best blank expression. Aaron leaned back in his chair, studying me hard enough to make me fidget a little more.

  “I think you’re going to be a problem for me, Miss Caldwell. I haven’t figured out how big just yet, but definitely a problem.”

  For the rest of the day while in his company, I tried to appear as professional as possible. Considering the subject of the one-on-ones, it was easy to do.

  After the final fat cat left Aaron’s office, we both sat back in our respective chairs, exhausted.

  “Well?” he asked.

  “Well what?”

  “Which ones do you think should go?”

  I couldn’t make that call. Too many things depended upon that decision.

  “Grace, you’ve been with me through the entire set of interviews. You’ve heard their responses. You have an opinion. I’m asking you for it.”

  “How many do you have to let go?”

  “You should be asking how many will I be keeping. As I see it, there can only be three worth holding on to.”

  “Jess Stewart, Carl Jacobson, and Steve Pearson.”

  He watched me with surprise for a few moments before smiling. “I’m impressed. Those are the three I’d planned to keep. You might make it in the advertising world after all.”

  His praise had the opposite effect on me. I wasn’t flattered.

  “Trust me, it’s a good thing whether you want to believe it or not. You have a natural instinct when it comes to business. It will prove invaluable in the future, but I don’t want to have an argument with you, and I can see we’re heading for one.” Aaron watched me with a calculating look on his face that told me he was well aware of what I was thinking. I’d have to try harder to keep my feelings to myself if I wanted to avoid being at constant odds with him.

  “I want you to schedule a series of short meetings on Friday with each of the other executive team members. I’ll need to let them know they’re out of a job. And, before you can say what you’re thinking right now, I will offer a nice severance package. Don’t worry—I’m not that cutthroat. Now, what do you say since we both skipped lunch you let me make it up to you by buying you dinner?”

  I’d been in his company all day long. I just wanted to get away from him and sort out what my feelings were for him.

  And I had promised Deb I’d meet her before the church service that evening.

  “I…can’t. I have plans already.”

  I could tell that didn’t exactly go over too well. I’m sure Aaron expected me to be at his disposal. I was just as determined to let him know I had a life outside of work.

  “You mean you have a date?” His tone served to remind me of how ruthless he could be. I didn’t want to make him my enemy.

  “That’s none of your business—”

  “I’m sorry, but I think it is.” The unrelenting sound was still there even though he was smiling. “Like it or not, this job will not be a nine-to-five. I need you when I need you—not when it fits into your social schedule. I understand you have a life outside of the office, but you need to understand there are times when you will have to compromise.”

  “Well, then, maybe taking this job was a mistake after all. Because there are some things I won’t compromise on for you or anyone else.” I stood and headed for the door. I’d managed only a couple of steps when Aaron caught up with me.

  “Wait, Grace, I’m sorry. You’re right. It was uncalled for and I apologize. Don’t go. Just chalk it up to the fact that it’s been a crazy couple of days and I’m exhausted. And you’re right, I don’t understand, but I would like to have the opportunity to try if you’ll let me. Okay, so you have plans tonight. After all, I didn’t give you much notice. In the future, I will try to be more sensitive. It’s just I hate eating alone, although I should be used to it by now. It seems to happen more times than not.”

  For the first time since meeting him, I think I saw Aaron Severn as a human being with human emotions.

  “You can come with me if you’d like.”

  He had an odd expression on his face. “Won’t your date mind?”

  For reasons I didn’t want to get into with him looking at me the way he was at the moment, I hated telling him the truth. Maybe because I’d read too much about his personal life to believe he spent any evenings alone, no matter what he’d claimed. But Aaron was alone, and he was in a strange city, and I was the only person he knew.

  “It’s not a date. I’m attending church services with my friend, Deb.”

  “Church?” He said the word as if it were incomprehensible to him. “You want me to come to church with you?” he asked incredulously.

  I couldn’t keep my laughter inside any longer. “Yes, church. You have heard of it before, haven’t you? I take it you don’t normally attend church then?”

  He nodded.

  “Then yes, it’s what I’m suggesting, but I wouldn’t want you to go into shock or anything more serious because of it.”

  “Church,” he said again, actually considering it while ignoring my nasty remark.

  “We could have dinner afterward?”

  “Sure. Why not? It sounds…interesting. I haven’t been to church since…” He stopped to consider this for a second before shaking his head. “Longer than I can remember.”

  “Then I think it’s about time, don’t you? You’ll like my church. It’s small and full of nice people. Who knows, maybe a little of all the nice stuff will rub off on you.”

  I don’t know what was the hardest for me to take in. The in-awe expression on my friend Deb’s face when I walked into the church sanctuary with Aaron, or the out-of-place way Aaron appeared sitting next to me on my favorite pew.

  Or maybe it was simply the surprise on every single member’s face when I showed up with a man. They’d long ago stopped asking if I was dating anyone special.

  “Aaron, this is my best friend, Deb Martin. Deb, I’m sure you know Mr. Severn. Deb works for you, Aaron. She supports Albert Enders.” For the first time, I remembered Albert wasn’t on the “to ke
ep” list. As Aaron shook Deb’s hand, our gazes met. He understood what I was thinking.

  Once the service was over, Deb left me alone with Aaron. She told me she was meeting her boyfriend, Brian, at his parents’ house. For once, I felt sorrier for her than I did myself. I’d heard all the horror stories about Brian’s parents. They didn’t approve of Deb as a possible daughter-in-law.

  Aaron left it up to me to choose where we would have dinner. I decided he needed a little authentic taste of Texas. So I took him to my favorite barbeque joint. The kind of place where they serve barbeque up by the pound on white meat market paper. Aaron wasn’t nearly as convinced as I was when I told him he would love it.

  “Come on, you have to try it just once. This place is a legend around town.” Still unsure, he took a bite of one of the seasoned ribs, sending sloppy barbeque sauce squirting in just about every direction. It was on his face, running down the front of his crisp, white shirt, before plopping onto the white paper. He was lucky to have taken his jacket off, otherwise it would have been all over that as well. I was almost positive I felt some of it strike my cheek.

  As hard as I tried, I couldn’t keep from laughing at his disgusted expression. He was such a Yankee. Didn’t he realize you couldn’t eat ribs without a bib and whole lot of napkins?

  “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”

  “I did not. I’m sorry. How did I know you had no idea how to eat ribs? Don’t they have them in New York?” I reached for a handful of napkins, handed him several, and then tucked one into his shirt. “There, you should be safe now.”

  That strange expression was back on his face as he leaned over and wiped the sauce from my cheek.

  “Pretty good shot, don’t you think?” He showed me the sauce he’d just wiped from my face.

  “Remind me next time to sit at another table.”

  “There’s not going to be a next time. You got me once. You won’t be so lucky again.”

  “Well, maybe not with barbeque, but there are lots of other ways, Mr. Severn. You are, after all, a foreigner here. You stand out like a sore thumb.”

  At least I made him smile a little, which diminished the disturbing expression in his eyes. “Another homespun adage I take it?”

  “Yep, I’m full of them.”

  “I see. As I said before, I think you’re going to be trouble for me. I’m not so sure I’m ready for you just yet, Miss Caldwell.” I had no idea what he meant. I was finding the best way to take him was on face value alone.

  Even so, I was aware of every little thing he said or did. To cover my sudden awareness, I decided to ask him some questions about himself. So far, all I knew about him was that he could be impossible to deal with and he dated many women.

  “So, your parents must be proud of you?” I never said I had a lot of tact.

  “Is this your way of asking me about myself? I didn’t think you cared.” He took my silence for what it was—complete annoyance at his sarcasm. “My parents passed away when I was away at the university. It’s only me in the world.”

  “I’m sorry…oh, Aaron, I had no idea. It must have been…awful.”

  “Yes, it was. But it was also an awfully long time ago.”

  “I didn’t know you were so old.”

  His full attention was back on me once again. “Your way of asking how old I am?”

  “Maybe…”

  “I’m thirty-seven.”

  “Wow,” I blurted out.

  Aaron shook his head. “Okay, smart guy, what about you? How old are you?”

  “You know, I’d think with all the women you’re supposed to have dated in your lifetime, you would have learned something about them by now. Don’t you know you never ask a woman her age?”

  Aaron wasn’t smiling. “It just so happens there aren’t as many women in my past as you and everyone else in the world would like to think. And I happen to know you’re twenty-three, Grace. I was just being polite. What about your parents?”

  Of course, I knew the question was coming even though I was trying my hardest to steer the conversation away from me. I hated talking about my parents because it always led to the inevitable questions about them.

  Looking into Aaron’s blue eyes, I knew if I didn’t say something, and soon, he would guess the truth on his own. “My mother passed away when I was six. I haven’t seen my father since.”

  I think he figured it was not the time to ask a whole lot of questions on the subject.

  “Where did you grow up?” The compassion in his voice threatened to crack my hard-won resolve.

  “With my grandparents. My mom’s parents. They have a small farm outside of Amarillo.”

  “I see. It must have been hard—losing both parents so young?”

  How could I tell him I couldn’t let go of the hurt? At times, the pain was just as strong as it had been when I was a scared girl of six who didn’t understand her mother was dying. The little girl who cherished her father’s love, only to lose it when he left us both for good.

  I tried again to change the subject. “It was, but my grandparents were wonderful. I was lucky.” I pretended to look at my watch before faking surprise. “Oh no, is that the time? I need to go.”

  Just before he agreed with me, I saw the truth. He knew. He’d seen my pain before I could hide it.

  “You’re right. It is late. And we have a busy day tomorrow.” I was happy to agree to him picking me up at eight the following morning. I would have agreed to anything just to get rid of him.

  Thankfully, Aaron didn’t press me. He drove me home, walked me to the door, and simply said goodnight.

  Before I unlocked the door, I heard the phone ringing inside the apartment. Even as I picked up the receiver, I knew it would be Deb.

  “So are you going to tell me what’s happening between you and our very, very, very handsome boss?” Deb’s implication came across loud and clear.

  “Nothing. And I thought you were at Brian’s parents’?” I was beginning to wonder if maybe she’d made the whole thing up.

  “I still am,” she whispered in a pained voice. I had to laugh. “And boy do I wish I weren’t, but I don’t want to talk about that. I didn’t risk the wrath of Brian’s mom to call you and talk about me. I want to know what’s going on with you.”

  “Deb…” I let out a frustrated sigh at her persistence. “I told you, he’s my boss.”

  “Uh-huh. Well I don’t happen to remember you having dinner with Susan before.”

  “Deb!” I guess I couldn’t blame her. Even though she knew all of my reasons for not wanting to get married, she didn’t believe them. “Don’t start. You, of all people, should understand I’m not going to allow anything to happen with Mr. Severn, or any other guy for that matter.”

  “Oh, Grace.” I could hear it in her voice. She wanted to point out all the obvious once again , but I think she figured it would be pointless. Instead, she simply changed the subject. “So tell me about Marge’s reaction.”

  “How did you know about Marge?” As always, it amazed me that Deb had known about my little silent run-in with Queen Marge.

  “Sources, honey. Never give up your sources. So you want to have lunch tomorrow so you can give me the full scoop in person?”

  I would have given anything not to have to explain what I was doing tomorrow.

  “I can’t. I’m sorry. Maybe the following day?”

  “Why not tomorrow? What are you going to be doing tomorrow?”

  Deb knew something was up, and it would be useless to try to deny it any longer.

  “I have to go with Aaron to look at houses.”

  Her burst of hysterical laughter told me how much she was enjoying our little conversation. “You’re kidding—right?”

  “Stop laughing, and no, I’m not kidding. He wants me to help him find someplace to live.” I told her about our earlier conversation while cringing through all of Deb’s oohs and aahs.

  “You think he’s going to buy you a car?”


  “Don’t be silly. Of course he’s not going to buy me a car.”

  “I think you should help him pick out one of those expensive houses with lots of room for babies. Who knows?”

  “I’m hanging up now because I think being at the in-laws has finally sent you over the edge. I’ll give you a call tomorrow, okay?” I added in a little nicer tone.

  If I were being honest with myself, Deb was my only close friend in Austin. I considered the folks at church to be good friends, but none of them knew me in the same way as Deb.

  As hard as I tried, that night I couldn’t shut out the past. It was always there, so vivid each time I allowed myself to think about my mother and as always, the tears came.

  I lay in bed and cried just as many tears as I’d shed all those years ago for the woman whose smile I possessed. In so many ways, I was living proof of my mother’s existence, even though her light had been extinguished.

  I picked up her picture that sat on my bedside table. It was like looking into a mirror. The only true noticeable difference was our eyes. My mother had the most amazing brown eyes. I’d inherited my green ones from my father. I still remember the look in his eyes when he told me he was leaving. I could remember everything about him, even though I hadn’t kept a single photo of him.

  I woke late the following morning, tired and emotionally exhausted. The reflection looking back at me in the mirror told me I wasn’t going to fool anyone, no matter how much makeup I applied. The evidence of all my tears was right there on my face for the world to see.

  I’d never been house hunting before in my life, so I had no idea what was the most appropriate outfit for any proper executive assistant to wear while helping her boss pick out the perfect house. I decided there was going to be plenty of time for dressing up later on. I was shooting for comfort.

  Right on time and much to my half-dressed distress, Aaron arrived on my doorstep immaculately clothed. I opened the door with bare feet and waved him inside.

  “Sorry, I’m trying to find my shoes.” The amusement in his eyes told me he hadn’t missed a single thing about my appearance, right down to the fact that I wasn’t wearing any shoes. I promptly dismissed his look with a nasty one of my own.