by Mia Ross
Pressing her hands on the table, she stood and glowered at him like something nasty she’d stepped in. The fact that she didn’t say anything gave him a pretty good idea how furious she was.
Well, that was fine with him. He was pretty mad himself, and he stood up, too. It worked for Matt, towering over people and looking down at them, so John decided to give it a shot. He needed some kind of edge over this feisty blonde.
Smart as she was, he figured she’d respond best to reason. “You’re overreacting. You know that, right?”
Glaring mercilessly, she held her arms out, which pushed her growing stomach into the center of their argument. “Comes with the territory.”
“Aw, don’t blame the baby. That’s not fair.”
“Fine. I’ll blame you, then. This is the twenty-first century, Sawyer. Women are perfectly capable of managing their own lives without interference from cavemen like you.”
As her eyes narrowed to glittering slits, John actually considered backing up a step or two. How did Matt and Ridge navigate such dangerous territory? Maybe there was a map they hadn’t told him about.
He’d have to ask them later. For now, he focused on smoothing Amanda’s ruffled feathers. “I was only trying to help.”
“If I wanted that kind of help, I’d have stayed in California.”
Before he could stammer some kind of intelligent response, the phone rang. Turning her back on him, she went to the wall and picked up the handset. “Sawyer Farm.” After listening for a few moments, she nodded. “Okay, Ridge. Give Marianne a hug from me and tell her the kids will be there soon.”
Their argument forgotten, John bellowed, “Kyle! Emily!”
They came bounding down the stairs, their excited faces making it clear they knew what was up. Grinning, he opened the back door and fished his keys out of his pocket. “Your dad just called to tell us Andrew and Chelsea are on their way. Let’s go meet ’em.”
When Amanda didn’t move to join them, Emily tugged on her hand. “Come on. You’re going to help Mommy take care of the new babies, so they have to meet you, too.”
Amanda flashed John a panicky look, but he quickly averted his eyes as they headed outside. If she wanted to go with them, fine. If not, that was fine, too. Infuriatingly headstrong and sharper than she needed to be, she drove him completely over the edge sometimes. He recalled Matt complaining about those same qualities in his sassy wife. More than once.
Maybe, John thought as he dialed Matt’s number on his fancy new phone, that was part of their charm.
“Hey, Matt. Ridge called, and we’re on our way to the hospital with the kids. My car’s full, so you should pick up your girls and meet us there.” Setting the speakerphone the way Caty had showed him, he checked the kids’ seat belts and started his Triumph while Matt growled about finishing this round of haying. “Stay out there by yourself, I don’t care. I’m gonna go see my new niece and nephew.”
Matt was in midrant when John clicked off the phone. Matt’s Led Zeppelin ringtone went off almost immediately, and it actually sounded angry. John pressed the decline button and turned onto the highway that led to Kenwood.
“Boy, are you gonna be in trouble,” Kyle warned. “Uncle Matt hates it when you ignore him like that.”
Too excited to worry about riling his big brother’s notorious temper, John grinned into the rearview mirror. “Kid, I’ve been doing it all my life.”
“True,” Amanda agreed, “and it always made him furious.”
Deciding to test the waters, John joked, “Everyone’s good at something.”
When she didn’t respond, he slanted a glance over to find her staring out at the fields whipping by. Not ready to make nice, he thought with a mental sigh. Stubborn wasn’t the word for her sometimes.
“Amanda, how long have you and Uncle John known each other?” Emily asked.
“I was four when my family moved here. Your uncle and I met in Sunday school and started arguing about who should get the grape-colored crayon.”
That she remembered a tiny detail like that did something funky to John’s heart. They had so much history together, and now she was back in his life. Like a wrecking ball, knocking down all the defenses he’d built so he wouldn’t have to take anything too seriously. Much as he’d like to reclaim the carefree attitude he’d cultivated all these years, those days were gone.
It had taken him a long time to realize he loved Amanda Gardner. Now that he had, he couldn’t imagine his days without her.
Keeping his eyes on the road, he found her hand on the center console and gave it a little squeeze. When she laced her fingers through his, the knot that had been tightening his chest started to unravel, and he found himself breathing more easily.
Later, they could talk about his well-intentioned but clumsy attempt to be helpful. She’d scold him for being overbearing, he’d apologize for not respecting her need to be self-sufficient. She could keep the phone or not, whichever she preferred. All he wanted was for her to smile up at him and tell him she loved him.
And if she wanted to end their fight with a kiss, he wouldn’t complain.
Chapter Eleven
Amanda could feel John tense up the instant they set foot inside the lobby of Kenwood Community Hospital. The excitement he’d been projecting faded noticeably, and she couldn’t miss his long look at the sign that showed visitors the way to the ICU. She could only imagine what was going through his head, and she slid an arm around him in support.
Grimacing, he murmured, “I hate this place. Mom died here, and we never got to say goodbye.”
“Hailey was also born here,” she reminded him firmly. “And now Andrew and Chelsea are coming into the world, so that means the good will outweigh the bad.”
After a few moments, he gave her a half smile and dropped a kiss on top of her head. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. Thanks.”
“Anytime.”
The kids had stopped in front of the gift shop window and were quarreling about something that had snagged their attention.
“What’s up, guys?” she asked as she and John paused behind them.
“Emily wants to get the babies something.” Kyle pointed at a cluster of stuffed animals. “I told her they can’t have stuff like that ’til they’re older.”
“I still think Chelsea would like the bunny and Andrew would like that turtle,” Emily protested.
“Drew,” Kyle corrected her. “We’re calling him Drew.”
“I still think he’d like it,” she went on as if he hadn’t scolded her. “It’s really cute.”
The girl’s thoughtfulness was touching, and Amanda nodded. “They are. You know, we could buy them now and keep them on a shelf in the nursery until the twins are old enough to play with them.”
Kyle nodded. “That works. But we didn’t bring any money.”
“Guess you’ll have to work ’em off, then,” John teased. “You two head in and start your shift. We’ll pick you up on the way out.”
Hands on her hips, Emily glared up at him as if he didn’t loom over her like a massive tree over a sapling. “Uncle John, that is so not funny.”
He made a uniquely male sound that was half groan and half laugh. “Oh, man. You sound just like your Aunt Lisa.”
Her glare mellowed into the most adorable smile on the planet. “What a nice thing to say. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
Grumbling, John took out his wallet to pay for the gifts. Once they were back on track, Kyle navigated the way to the maternity waiting area. The place was full of toys, right down to a small plastic playground set and two TVs connected to video-game consoles. Delighted, the kids ditched Amanda and John and started making friends.
As they approached the seating area, Amanda pulled him to a stop and gave him a quick kiss
. “Love you, Sawyer.”
Settling his arms around her, he gave her the smile that could melt the iciest heart in North Carolina. “Love you, too, Gardner. Do I need to apologize?”
“For being so generous you want to help me get my business up and running?” Despite her earlier aggravation, she shook her head. “It’s me who should apologize. This is totally different than my situation in California, and I don’t know why I reacted that way. I feel terrible.”
“So you’ll keep the phone?” he asked with a hopeful expression. “I mean, it would be good to have one while you’re out, just in case you need something.”
Now it was starting to make sense. He was concerned about her not being able to call someone if she was in trouble. Determined to maintain her precious independence, she’d done the equivalent of kicking a puppy who wanted nothing more than to love her. “Is that where this is coming from? You’re worried about me?”
“Well, you’re out with the kids a lot, and if something happens, you should have a phone.”
“Not that nice a phone.”
He shrugged as if the cost wasn’t a big deal to him. “You can have whatever kind you want. As long as I’m on the speed dial, I don’t care.”
All those years in L.A. had jaded her, Amanda realized. She’d learned to examine people’s behavior for ulterior motives, not take them at face value. Ted’s heartless proposal had driven the lesson home, and she’d transferred her cynical view of the world to John.
Only, John was the least manipulative person she’d ever met. He wasn’t perfect, but he was the kind of guy who said what he meant and meant what he said. Fortunately for her, one of his faults was that he had a weakness for mouthy blondes.
“Which number on the speed dial?” she asked as they found a love seat within view of the play area and sat down.
Stretching his arms across the back of the sofa, he crossed his long legs in front of him and nearly blinded her with his aw-shucks country-boy grin. “Number one, of course.”
“Of course,” she retorted primly, yanking his chain a little. Despite their earlier misunderstanding, she really enjoyed sparring with him, knowing he’d give it right back to her, no hard feelings. “You certainly think a lot of yourself.”
That got her a shameless grin. “No reason not to.”
She was just about to zing him for being conceited when a sudden sharp pain in her back put an end to the fun. Reaching behind her, she discovered she couldn’t reach it. Before she could even ask, John unfolded himself from his lazy pose and moved his hand in circles over her lower back until she hummed. “Right there.”
Gently as first, then more firmly, he massaged the muscle until the knot was finally gone. Sighing in relief, she carefully leaned against him to avoid another spasm. “Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
As his arm tightened around her in a half hug, she closed her eyes and tried to relax. She’d just begun to doze off when Kyle yelled, “Dad!”
“Hey, you guys.” Still dressed in blue scrubs and booties, Ridge’s grin was so huge, it was threatening to crack his face wide open. “Marianne’s not ready for company yet, but I thought you might like to see some pictures.”
The kids crowded in, and he thumbed across the screen on his phone. “Nope, not that one. Your mom would kill me. Here’s a good one.”
Leaning closer, they all ooed and ahhed over the two wrinkly but healthy babies.
“Which one is Chelsea?” Emily wanted to know. When Ridge pointed her out, the little girl smiled. “She’s really pretty, isn’t she, Daddy?”
“She looks just like you, sweetness.”
“Drew’s bigger, though,” Kyle said. “That’s good, ’cause us Sawyer boys have to be big and strong. Right, Uncle John?”
“Got that right. We’ll have him out on a tractor in no time.”
“Or up in a plane crop dusting,” Ridge suggested. “I’d like to think there’s a little of me in there, too.”
The comment had apparently slipped out without his thinking about it, because he stared at the picture frozen on the screen and smiled. While Amanda had seen for herself how much he adored Kyle and Emily, there was obviously something different about actually being his children’s father.
Would John feel the same way? She didn’t doubt for a second that he could love her daughter, but even if he adopted her, there would always be something missing. That unbreakable Sawyer bond wouldn’t be part of the equation, no matter what he did.
The realization made her want to cry, so she firmly pushed it away. Today was for celebrating Drew and Chelsea coming into the world, not dreading the birth of a child with no family to call her own.
* * *
“Come on, Chelsea,” Amanda pleaded in a whisper, bouncing the fussy three-week-old in a slightly different way. She’d fled to the back porch, hoping to keep the house quiet enough for everyone else to remain asleep. “Your mama needs some sleep, so I’m it. Work with me here.”
That got her a few precious seconds of silence, and she began to relax. Big mistake. Once she loosened her hold, the baby started up again. Amanda hadn’t thought she could get any louder, but she’d been wrong. She couldn’t have been wronger.
Was that even a word? she wondered, realizing she was punchy from a severe lack of sleep. Marianne was still a few days away from being allowed on her feet, so a lot of the fetching and carrying of infants had fallen to Amanda, Ridge and John. None of them was getting much rest, but they’d all agreed to a rotating baby-care schedule to allow Marianne time to recuperate.
Right now, Amanda was regretting taking Ridge’s shift.
No good deed goes unpunished.
In her memory, she could hear her father reciting one of his personal philosophies. A pessimist to the core, he always saw the darkest side of any situation. Puppies made messes. Kids made too much noise. Once, when she’d pointed out a rainbow near their home, he’d muttered about the rain washing out his round of golf.
She didn’t want to be that way, Amanda thought as she cradled Chelsea in her other arm. She wanted to see the bright, positive angles in life, no matter how bad things got. The way John did.
As if on cue, she heard his front screen door creak open and slam shut. Tucker zoomed in from wherever he’d been and took off down the lane. A few seconds later, she saw the two of them making their way toward the main house.
A huge yawn split John’s handsome face, and he dragged his fingers through still-damp hair. It was four in the morning, and with harvest season nearly over, she knew he’d be out in the fields by five. He normally started his day by rolling out of bed and pulling on whatever clothes were handy. Even allowing for a shower, he could have snuck in another half hour of sleep. That he’d given that up and was coming to help her out brought a rush of tears to her eyes.
“Hey now.” He hurried to join her on the porch. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. It’s just that Chelsea won’t calm down, and I really have to go to the bathroom.”
“Clean and fed?” he asked.
“Of course. I’m not an idiot.” She heard the snap in her tone and took a deep breath. “Sorry. There’s a loose shutter outside my window, and it banged all night. I didn’t get much sleep, and then I was up with the babies.”
“I’ll fix it this afternoon.”
“You’re so busy...”
“What? I don’t have five minutes and a hammer?”
The tension she’d been fighting eased a little, and she managed a smile. “Thanks.”
“No problem.” Holding out his hands, he carefully lifted Chelsea and settled her against his chest. Instantly, she stopped crying and cuddled in like a perfectly well-behaved child.
“Show-off.”
“We all have our talents.”
“I th
ink you have more than the legal limit,” Amanda accused as she headed inside.
Behind her, he chuckled quietly, and she had to smile. Maddening as he could be, John Sawyer was by far the best guy she’d ever known. Much as she treasured her independence, she honestly didn’t know what she’d do without him.
* * *
Once Chelsea fell asleep, John figured the best thing was not to mess with whatever he’d done that had gotten her that way. So he settled into the white wicker rocker on the back porch and chatted with Amanda through the screen.
“How’s business?” he asked while she got the coffee going.
“Better. I picked up another client this week, so that makes four. Ruthy’s the best advertising I could have asked for.” Batter bowl in hand, she came to the back door. Barefoot, she was wearing a flowery dress with a belt that tied above her waist. The pale colors highlighted her eyes, and she was finally glowing the way pregnant women were supposed to.
“That’s a pretty dress.”
“Marianne insisted on giving it to me. She said she got big so fast, she never got a chance to wear it, so it still had the tag on it.” John tried not to smile, but when she pinned him with a knowing look, he knew he hadn’t quite managed it. “Lisa bought this for me, and they made up that story so I wouldn’t get mad.”
“I’m not sayin’ nothin’.”
She rolled her eyes, but let the subject drop. “Whatever. I forgot to tell you—Ruthy’s got a room coming open at the beginning of October, and she promised to hold it for me. That’s when Marianne wants to move the twins into their nursery, so the timing is perfect for me to move into town.”
John’s heart plunged to the weathered floorboards, and it was all he could do to hold still and avoid awakening his niece. All this time, he’d known Amanda would be leaving at some point. But now that there was a timetable attached to her plans, he didn’t know how to take it. “Sounds good.”