Restorations

by Nicole Dykes

  My parents only expected excellence academically, and there was no time for socialization. “I think it’s very sweet.”

  He nods in agreement, sipping the punch Lola made. “Yeah, until they’re older. Then it will be terrifying.”

  I laugh at that, but honestly I don’t want to think about Sebastian getting older and dating. I want him to stay my baby a little while longer. “Is Jacee’s mother here?”

  He shakes his head, his gaze darkening slightly. “No. We aren’t together. We split holidays, and I got Halloween.”

  Well, this feels awkward all of a sudden, especially when I feel Asher’s gaze on me from across the room, and I look at him with quiet curiosity. He stares with disdain before I look away from him and back to Aaron. “What about Baz’s dad?”

  And there’s that sinking feeling in my stomach I always get when I have to explain what happened. It shouldn’t be this difficult. I didn’t love Colt. Our conceiving Baz wasn’t from teenage love. It was a moment of lust and then a lifetime of never knowing who he was. “He um . . .” My eyes meet Asher’s again as my voice turns to a whisper. “He died.”

  “Oh no. I’m so sorry.” He’s sounds genuine enough. “And where does Mr. Sterling fit into all of this?”

  I pull my gaze away from Asher when he asks that and forgot for a moment that Asher is Jacee’s teacher. “He is Colt’s, Baz’s father’s, brother.”

  He nods. “Ah, I guess I see the resemblance.”

  “So, you’re doing this all on your own?”

  I’m starting to get annoyed with his prying, but I know how much Baz likes Jacee. I don’t want to hurt their friendship because I’m getting a creepy vibe from her dad. And I could be overreacting. People are curious. “No. I’m not.” I smile as I look around the room and realize that’s true. “I have Asher and The Joker there.” I nod toward Ash and Sawyer, who seem awfully chummy and I wonder if there’s hope for them. Then I gesture toward Penelope and Linc, who are dancing with a group of kids. “And Batman and Cat Woman. Batman is Colt’s other brother.”

  Aaron smiles at that. “I see.”

  I point toward Lola and Hayden last. “And then, of course, Aquaman and Harley Quinn.”

  He leers at Lola a little too long. “And who are they?”

  “The hot, crazy looking blonde is Baz’s aunt, but be careful looking too long because Aquaman is quite possessive.”

  He grins, his gaze turning back toward me and lets his knuckles graze down the length of my bare arm, making me feel naked and vulnerable. “That’s okay. I was always partial to Wonder Woman myself.”

  I feel dirty the way he’s looking at me, and I take a step back, smiling politely but wanting to get far away from him. When I back up, it’s into a hard body.

  “Mr. Kincaid.”

  Aaron’s eyes lock on Asher’s behind me. “Mr. Sterling. I didn’t know you would be at the party.”

  “It’s my house and my nephew, of course.”

  He nods again curtly, and it’s clear there’s animosity between the men. “I didn’t know Baz was your nephew.” He looks over at the kids playing, and his eyes flick to me. “Good thing he has such a wonderful mother to keep his nose clean.”

  I hear a growl bubbling up from Asher and turn around to face him, pushing my hands on his chest to nudge him back. “Asher, can you help me in the kitchen please?”

  His jaw ticks as he looks over at Jacee’s dad, but then he takes a deep breath and looks down at me, nodding. “Yeah.”

  I turn back to Aaron. “Enjoy the party. I have to go grab some more snacks.”

  I have to drag Asher away and into the kitchen, but when we enter that room, he swiftly cages me in-between his long arms, trapping me against the counter as his palms rest on the top. “He touched you.”

  “I didn’t want him to.” My breath is raspy and rapid from the close contact.

  “Stay away from him, Viv. He’s not a good man.”

  I study his face and can tell he’s completely serious. “He seems harmless. Maybe a little creepy, but I’m not sure he’s a villain, Superman.”

  He rolls his eyes at me, only leaning further into my personal space, and I can’t lie—I like it. “Just for once, trust me.”

  “I have no interest in him anyway. You don’t have to worry.”

  He pushes off the counter but doesn’t move. “I’m not worried.”

  I smile, taking in his Superman costume and thinking about him telling me I looked hot earlier. He’s the epitome of the perfect male specimen. Most men would have to opt for the costume with added muscles, but Asher didn’t need them. The spandex molds to each dip of carved perfection, and it makes me ache for him.

  But he doesn’t want more, Vivienne.

  I try to force myself to listen to my own reasoning.

  But when he grins at me and gestures for me to go back to the party with him, I know deep down . . .

  My resolve is weakening.

  I can’t sleep.

  Seeing her in that costume tonight and then seeing that motherfucker, Mr. Kincaid, hitting on her—fucking touching her—I’m not remotely tired.

  I’m consumed by a need to be near her.

  A need that pisses me the fuck off.

  She told me she’s not okay just fucking. If I were a better man, I would just stay away.

  But I’m not a better man.

  I climb out of my bed, tugging a pair of black sweats over my bare ass and walking into the hall quietly. I’m sure Baz is still passed the fuck out. After the party, Viv, Sawyer, and I walked with Baz around the neighborhoods for hours, trick-or-treating.

  It was fun. I also hate that it was fun. And I won’t admit how much I missed Sawyer. Not even in my thoughts.

  I see a glow coming from the living room and follow it. I smile when I see the horror flick on the television and Viv huddled under a blanket on the couch. She’s awake with a bowl of popcorn on one side, wine in a cup next to her and the candy Baz collected tonight on the other side.

  “You want company?”

  She pops the red lollipop she was sucking on out of her mouth and looks up at me, wide-eyed. “Sure.”

  I move the popcorn bowl to my lap and take a handful as I watch the movie with her. Both of us sit in silence as she sucks on that fucking lollipop, driving me crazy from the corner of my eye.

  “Jason, huh?”

  She shrugs her shoulders. “I already watched Halloween tonight.”

  “Kind of fucked up, you’re watching a movie about a guy drowning in a lake.”

  I see the realization dawning on her as her eyes widen and she turns to me, holding the sucker in her hand. “Oh my God. I never even thought about it.”

  I laugh, and it’s a real laugh because she looks so fucking horrified. “I’m fucking with you.”

  “Still . . .” She grits her teeth and looks back toward Baz’s room. “His father died that way.”

  “Jason didn’t die, but those camp counselors that were supposed to be watching the kids, instead of fucking, sure did.”

  She still looks disturbed, and I can’t help it. I place the popcorn bowl next to me and pull her to my lap, letting her thighs straddle me. I smile up at her, happy she’s only wearing an oversized t-shirt.

  And I fucking love that it’s a Jason t-shirt. She really does love horror movies. The manufactured thrill.

  “I’m sorry, Asher.”

  A lump forms in my throat, hearing those words from her, knowing without a doubt she’s not talking about the stupid movie. I place my hands on the sides of her head and pull her lips down to me but don’t press mine against hers.

  “Say it again.” My voice is hoarse, and I feel her shiver as she sits on my lap.

  “I’m so sorry. For everything.”

  My lips capture hers, kissing her softly as I hold onto her, my fingers threading into her hair as I cup the back of her head. Our mouths move as one, my tongue dipping inside to taste the cherry from her sucker. “Apple was always
my favorite, but cherry’s not bad.”

  I move away from her lips only to lift her shirt from her, freeing her breasts and cupping them with a hand, groaning at the feeling, never able to get enough of her. She dips her head back slowly, enjoying my touch before bringing the sucker to my lips. I open my mouth and allow the candy to slip between my lips as I swirl my tongue around it, my hands still on her tits, my thumbs and fingers pinching her nipples, making her groan and grind against my prominent erection.

  She removes the lollipop from my mouth and then slowly drags it down my chin, and then my throat. She leaves a sticky trail down between my pecs and toward my belly button before she places it in a pile of wrappers already on the couch from earlier.

  Her hands rest on my shoulders as she drags her tongue over the trail she made, slowly teasing me, making my cock grow even harder before she licks all the way back up and nips on my bottom lip.

  I hold her around her waist and lift up, using my free hand to push my sweats down, freeing my cock and pushing her panties to the side. Her mouth moves to my ear. “What if Baz comes in? We should go to my room.”

  I shake my head. I don’t want this moment ruined, to break the spell where we both start to rethink this. I just want to touch her.

  I lift the blanket and wrap it around our bodies as I coax her to move over my cock, slowly sliding her down so the tip is inside, causing her head to fall back slightly and hold onto me even tighter.

  She moves her pelvis and takes more of me in as I hold onto her hips, pulling her to me and my dick home, imbedding myself fully into her. She meets my lips with hers, and we find our rhythm. My hands guide her hips as she takes me inside and slides back until my dick is nearly out. Over and over. We kiss as we move toward the ultimate pleasure, but we aren’t in a hurry for it to end.

  I kiss from her lips down her throat to her nipples, sucking and kissing them, nipping slightly and immersing myself in Viv, enjoying every second of feeling her pulse around me, knowing we’re both close and only moving closer to an orgasm each time the tip of my cock hits her deep inside. She moans my name softly.

  And it’s a beautiful sound.

  I’m lost in her, and when we both finish, I let my fingers sink into her hair and don’t push her away. I pull her body to mine. I kiss her lips and smooth her hair down.

  I just let us be.

  Today was a normal day. After we finished watching the movie, we both went to our own beds. This morning we woke up and did our usual routine. Asher took a very groggy Baz to school. I went to work.

  When we all got home, we ate dinner. I put Baz to bed. But nothing feels normal, not after last night.

  God, the way he held me. The way he kissed me.

  It’s enough to make my stupid heart flutter in my chest just thinking about it, but when I walk outside and find him sitting alone on the beach with his toes digging into the sand, the heart that was just fluttering with wonder and excitement, sinks.

  The way he’s looking at the water is terrifying and sends a chill straight to my bones. “Asher.”

  My whisper is quiet in the wind as I sit in the cool sand next to him. My feet and legs are bare, and I wish I was wearing jeans instead of a skirt.

  He doesn’t say a word as I close my eyes and turn my head away from looking at his beautiful profile. The look on his face is too stoic to bear. I reopen them when I'm facing the ocean. “The way you’re watching the water,” I keep my voice low as if I will spook him, “it’s like you want to join Colt.”

  My head dips down to look at the sand, but he doesn’t move. “I miss him. Every day.” I know he does.

  “We would all miss you too.”

  He takes a deep breath, but he still doesn’t move. “You don’t have anything to worry about. I won’t do that to Baz.”

  Baz.

  Not to me or his sister or brother. But for Baz, this man will live with unimaginable pain. “If Baz wasn’t a factor?”

  Finally, he turns his head, and I swivel mine to look into his broken eyes. “I’m not suicidal. You don’t need to worry.”

  “You have to forgive yourself, Asher. You were a child.”

  “I was old enough to know he was hurting, that something was wrong. What it was exactly, I'm not sure, but I think he knew Penelope had fucked Linc.”

  I don’t know the whole story. It’s really not my place to ask, but he hasn’t either. I think there’s a big chunk he doesn’t know about. “Maybe you should ask her.”

  I watch the deep swallow he takes. “It doesn’t matter. Nothing will bring him back.”

  He looks even more sad now, his eyes dropping to the sand between us. “Are you okay?”

  I know he’s talking about last night because no matter how much he tries to seem like an unfeeling asshole, he cares. Maybe he cares too deeply, and it’s crippling. “I’m fine.”

  I move my hand to let my fingers brush against the stubble of his cheek, and he grabs my wrist, pulling my hand away as he looks into my eyes. “Are you really okay?”

  I let him hold onto me. I don’t want him to let go. “No.”

  He drops my wrist, but I move to my knees, kneeling before him as he sits on the cold sand and place my hands on his shoulders.

  His gaze is distant as he tries to disconnect. “Are you still in love with me?”

  It’s not a question I’m prepared for. It’s one I've all but answered recently, and yet last night, I still had sex with him. I let him inside of my body, knowing full well my heart was 100 percent in it and his was not.

  I sweep my lips over his. “Shut up.” It’s a breathy request before I nip at his bottom lip, capturing his full lips with my own and not wanting to let go. I feel his hands tangle in my hair as he kisses me back.

  “Viv,” he breathes, sounding nearly in pain.

  “Don’t, Asher.” My hands wrap around his neck as I press my chest to his, hoping he can feel my heart, hoping he knows how much I love him. But I’m not stupid. “I’m a big girl, and I know exactly what’s coming, but I can’t stop this.” I bite his bottom lip and kiss him as I whisper softly, “I don’t want to.”

  He pulls me onto his lap. We’re breathing hard, the evidence of what we do to each other is between my thighs as I rub against his erection, intertwining in the best possible way. “I can’t lose Baz again.”

  “You won’t.”

  It’s a promise in the dark night, but when I feel him relax and pull me even closer to him, I know he believes me.

  And he should because no matter what, I won’t hurt him again, even if my heart splinters into a million pieces.

  I wake up in my bed with Viv’s naked body tucked against my side. Neither of us seem to be able to stop this between us.

  I’ve never felt so helpless. Knowing I should push her away, but also knowing that I don’t want to.

  “I need to get up.” I smile at the sound of her voice. Waking up next to her isn’t a hardship, but I’m afraid to let this feel too good.

  “Why?”

  “I need to get Baz ready for school.”

  I kiss her temple, enjoying her skin against mine too much. “I can do that.”

  She smiles up at me but shakes her head. “No, you need to get yourself ready.” Her eyes flicker with wickedness when she purrs, “Mr. Sterling.”

  “Fuck, Viv,” I groan, ready to pull her body to mine to quench the fire she just started, but before I can, I hear Baz pushing my door—that I now realize I forgot to lock—open and quickly tuck Viv under my comforter and roll to my side as she hides.

  “Uncle Asher!” Baz comes to my side of the bed. “Mommy isn’t in her room.”

  I hate lying to him. “She’s not?”

  He shakes his head. “She’s supposed to get me ready for school! I don’t want to be late.”

  He loves school so damn much. I lean back, angling my body, hoping to block the body next to me. “She’s probably in the kitchen making your breakfast, buddy.”

  He places his
finger on his chin, “Hmmm . . . I didn’t check there.”

  Relief washes over me even though I feel like shit for lying to him. “I’ll get you dressed for school, but first go hide and I'll find you.”

  “Do we have time?” His eyes flash with excitement. He loves to play hide and seek.

  I shrug my shoulders. “I’m pretty good at finding you.”

  He has a competitive streak in him. “I’m going to hide really good!”

  I smile and ruffle his hair. “Okay. I’ll give you to the count of twenty. Ready?”

  He nods, already heading out the door. I jump up and tug on a pair of sweats, but Viv doesn’t move from under the covers. I place a hand on the bed, leaning over and tugging the comforter down. “Get dressed, make the prince his breakfast, and I'll keep him distracted.”

  She smiles weakly. “That was too close.”

  I nod and leave a quick kiss against her lips because I can’t not kiss her. “I’ll remember to lock the door next time.”

  She nods quickly as she gets up, pulling on her shirt and skirt from last night, and we walk to my door. I glance around for Baz and then go into her room, doing another quick sweep before signaling her room is clear. She walks into her room, but her eyes hold mine. “I know I'm not supposed to thank you for being a good uncle.”

  I shake my head and hold her face in my hands, tilting her head up, biting her bottom lip.

  “Nope, but you can thank me for the three orgasms.”

  Her eyes roll, but she places a quick kiss on my lips anyway. “I think it was four.”

  I grin and then release her, shouting into the hallway, “Baz! Where are you?”

  I wink at her and leave her to get ready before walking down the hall toward the living room, not finding him until I go into his room and open the closet door. He looks disappointed, his little bottom lip poked out. “You found me.”

  “It took forever!” I scoop him up. “We better hurry and get your little butt dressed.”

  He giggles in my arms. “Butt.”

  I laugh, unable to hide my admiration for this little guy. I get him dressed in his school uniform and brush his hair before taking him into the kitchen. He runs to Viv, who’s at the stove making French toast. “Mommy! Uncle Asher was right! You were making breakfast.”