Truth or Lies

by JA Johnston

  “You have nothing to be ashamed of. I do. Everyone now knows, about me. They all know that I am a whore. That you’re engaged to a whore. I thought it was too much for you, that you ran.” I cry.

  Now Adam is wiping my tears with his thumb. “Never! I would never run or leave you. I love you. And I am sorry that I walked away from you. That I…dismissed you.” He takes a deep breath as he’s getting his emotions under control. “I’ve never had feelings for someone the way that I do for you. I hope that there is no next time around your father. Because I honestly don’t know if I can hold back again.”

  “Then don’t. No one has ever defended me. No one has ever offered to or intervened to do so.” I lean closer to him. “I love you, Adam James Hunter. Please, don’t ever walk away again, even if you think I’ll be ashamed. I would rather know what is going on in your head and your heart, then to think all the things that I have since you walked away.”

  “I promise to never walk away from you again.” He pulls me closer to him.

  “That was the second time you have. I don’t think I could handle a third. It would break me more than I am already broken.” I choke.

  “I love you, Amelia Cierra Bennett. I promise you, that I will never walk away from you again. I promise to never think that you will be ashamed of me.” He kisses my forehead. “And I solemnly promise to defend you every chance I get.”

  “I love you, Adam.” I manage to say before he captures my lips with his.

  Seventeen years, eight months

  I SAW THE doctor two days ago. Babies are fine, so am I, but he’s concerned with how many panic attacks I am having. A non-stress-test was performed, along with another ultrasound. Their weight is estimated around six to seven pounds. My cervix has softened. It was suggested that I stay at home resting to reduce the attacks.

  That was on Monday after the Winter’s Ball. Lucas has stayed at home with me, working from his home office. I told him I would be fine home alone, but he won’t budge since the doctor did say the twins could be here any day. “I have to go into the office to drop off some paperwork.” Lucas comes and sits on the couch with me. “Would you like to come with me then go to lunch?”

  I smile up at him. I haven’t eaten much last night or this morning, so he’s worried. I just feel so full after a couple of bites. “I’d love to, maybe it will get me out of this mood I’m in.” I lay my head back for a moment, “I feel blah!”

  He chuckles, “Well, let’s go try to cure this blah mood.”

  We’re not in the office very long, mostly everyone has gone to lunch also. On our way down, the elevator stops on the tenth floor. Adam steps in, “Hi!” He looks at me. “How are you? I haven’t seen you since the Ball.” He looks very concerned.

  “I’m fine. We’re fine.” I smile at him, “Just blah today.” I look over at Lucas, “So my husband is taking me to lunch.”

  “Want to join us?” Lucas asks.

  “I don’t want to intrude.”

  “You wouldn’t be. I haven’t seen or talked to anyone else for days.” I say jokingly.

  “Hey, are you bored with me already?” Lucas says teasingly.

  “Never.” I smile at him.

  “Amelia, you still haven’t eaten a lot.” Lucas states in a concerned tone. “Are you sure you’re okay?”

  “Yes, I’m just not that hungry. I feel like the food isn’t going down, it’s just laying right here.” I say rubbing above my stomach between my breasts. “I feel tired, but I’m not sleepy. A bit restless.” I look at the both of them, “I just…. I don’t know.”

  “You’re close to your due date, aren’t you?” Adam asks.

  “Three weeks. But her doctor said it could be any day. That’s why we’ve been at home, and I haven’t left her side.” He smiles and takes my hand.

  “Do you have to stay at home, or can you go out and do things, together?” Adam questions.

  “I suppose we don’t have to sit around the house.” Lucas shrugs, “Do you want to go do something?” he asks me.

  Sucking in my lips, I consider his question, “I don’t know. Not sure I’m up for walking around, but being in the house is getting on my nerves.”

  “Movie?” Adam suggests.

  “We haven’t been to the movies in a long time. What’s playing?” I ask.

  The two of them are both looking at their phones. “American Sniper.” Says Lucas, looking at me.

  “What’s that one about?” I ask. I haven’t been watching television, so I don’t know what’s even playing.

  “About a Navy Seal in Iraq.” Adam says still focusing on his phone.

  I groan I don’t mind action movies. I normally love them, but I’m not in the mood for that right now. “Anything calm out?”

  “Calm? A calm movie? Seriously?” Lucas questions. “Are you sure you’re my wife? You’re the one who normally would pick this out.”

  “I know. And now that you said what the movie is about, I do want to see it, but I’m not in the mood to right now.”

  “Still Alice.” Adam suggests again from his phone. “That’s about Alzheimer’s.”

  I groan. “Again, normally I would want to see it, but I don’t want to be depressed. I cried when Thomas Bragg was talking about his mother the other night.” I shake my head, “That’s what I can guarantee I would do if I saw a movie about it.”

  “Paddington.” Adam says in a serious tone.

  I can’t help it, but I chuckle. Which then turns into a giggle. “I don’t know why I think that’s funny. But you said that so seriously.” I’m holding my stomach.

  “It wasn’t that funny.” Lucas looks at me, as does Adam.

  I make my way to stand. “I’ll be right back; I need to use the restroom.” This has been the worst part of being pregnant. Constant bathroom time lately.

  The moment I sit on the toilet I hear a popping sound, like a cracked knuckle, then a huge gush rushes from my body. A pain shoots across my stomach. Whoa! I take a deep breath and count until it subsides. I guess that’s a contraction. Twenty seconds. I clean myself up and head to the sink to wash up.

  Before I make it back to the table, another contraction stops me in my tracks. I grab onto the back of the chair. “Oh my, are you okay?” An older gentleman asks me. I look at him, “You’re having a contraction. I remember that look from my wife. Who are you here with?”

  I don’t talk but point to Lucas and Adam. The gentlemen offers his arm to me, which I take. Lucas jumps up when he sees me. “What’s wrong?”

  “I believe your wife is in labor.” The man says.

  “Amelia?”

  “My water broke.” I say in a heavy tone, “Contraction, lasted about twenty seconds, I think.”

  “Sit down, let me call the doctor.” Lucas helps me sit and has his phone dialing. Adam stands up and begins to massage my shoulders.

  “Oh my, that feels good.” I moan.

  Lucas is holding my hand, “Okay, we’re on our way.” He ends the call and looks at me, “We need to get to the hospital. Do you think you can walk to the car?”

  “Yeah, I can.”

  With Adam on my left and Lucas on my right, we head to the door. Lucas is holding my hand, leading through the door first. I clear the doorway when I hear; “AMELIA!”

  I look up and see his heated hazel eyes locked with mine. Frozen, I have forgotten how to walk or talk, as I stare at my father. How is he here? In front of me? Lucas releases my hand, “NO!” he yells as he steps in front of me and pushes me back through the open door.

  BANG! BANG!

  Two shots! I hear two shots, I’m in Adam’s grasp as I watch Lucas fall in front of me. Chaos erupts around me as people are screaming and running. I get out of Adam’s grasp and kneel beside my husband, Lucas.

  There’s so much blood. He’s looking into my eyes as I hold his hands. “I…” He’s trying to talk. “Shh!” I say pleadingly, “Don’t talk, I don’t think you should. You’re going to be ok.” I cry, “I love
you, Lucas. You’re going to be fine.”

  Another contraction seizes my words. I grasp Lucas’ hand tighter while taking deep breathes. I look into my husband’s eyes, he has a lone tear streaming down the side of his face.

  “Love you.” Lucas says before he closes his eyes. Before he stops breathing.

  “No!” I scream holding onto him. “Open your eyes. Please, please, open your eyes.”

  My focus has been on Lucas, that I have not taken in the scene around me. The police have shown up; someone is pulling on my arm. “Amelia. You need to step away.”

  “No. No.” I plead. Gripping Lucas’ hands tighter. Someone reaches around me and takes my hands off of Lucas’, pulling me away. Paramedics swarm him. I cannot hear what they are saying, all I hear is my heart pounding in my ears.

  “M ‘am. M ‘am. Are you alright?” There’s a female paramedic kneeling in front of me.

  “Her water broke earlier. We were headed out to the hospital.” I hear Adam’s response and the feel of his hands on my shoulders.

  “Are you her husband?” the paramedic asks.

  “Friend.” He nods his heads towards Lucas. “That’s her husband.”

  Another contraction engulfs me. My nails dig into Adam’s thigh as he sits behind me, holding me steady. “We need to get her to the hospital.”

  I feel Adam lift me onto the stretcher, but my focus has been on Lucas. I still can not make out any words or sounds. The paramedic is doing something to my arm and is listening to my stomach with a stethoscope.

  Adam is on the opposite side, holding my hand. I know he’s talking to me, but my mind is not focusing on him. “Lucas.” I whisper and close my eyes.

  When I open my eyes again, I’m at the hospital. Everything is moving fast, Doctors and Nurses checking me, hooking up monitors. Someone checks me; “She’s nine centimeters.”

  The contractions are coming quicker and lasting longer now. “Lucas?”

  My doctor is beside me, “Amelia, I’m going to need you to save your strength to deliver the babies. Or do you want a C-section?”

  “No,” my mind is numb, “no surgery. Where’s Lucas?”

  “Amelia,” he begins, I can see his throat move as he hesitates, “who can we call for you?”

  “Grams.” I close my eyes and squeeze the bed rail. “Where’s Adam?”

  “Adam?”

  “Adam Hunter. I know he came here with me.” I manage to seethe out through a contraction.

  Before the contraction ends, I feel his touch on my arm and hear his words, “I’m here Amelia.”

  I look up and see his red tear-filled eyes. Worry etched across his face. “My phone, call Grams, Dan, Alex, Grace.” I close my eyes and groan as another contraction courses through me.

  “We need to check you again.” A nurse takes position at the foot of the bed and eases her hand into me. “She’s at ten!” Her eyes focus on me, “On the next contraction, you are going to push. You need to push through the entire contraction. Do you understand Amelia?”

  I only nod my head yes. “Sir, you are going to have to leave.” She looks at Adam.

  “No, he stays. He’s all I have right now until someone can get here.”

  “Okay.”

  “Amelia, are you sure?” he squeezes my hand.

  “Don’t you dare leave me! I can’t do this on my own.”

  “Here comes another contraction Amelia. You need to begin pushing, now.” The nurse demands.

  I bear down with all that I can. Funny, how in movies and television, they make birthing look easy. A couple of pushes out comes a baby. No, I have pushed now for thirty-five minutes. Finally, I feel the doctor pull my child the rest of the way out. “It’s a boy!”

  His nose is aspirated, and I’m asked if I want to cut the cord. With a shaking hand, I accept the scissors. “Adam.” He must have known what I was going to say, because his hand is wrapped around mine, steadying it. Inching our way closer to my son’s umbilical cord. All I can think is, this should be Lucas beside me.

  Fifteen minutes later, Adam helps me again, with my daughter’s cord. They lay both of my children, Lucas and Courtney, upon my chest. I kiss each of them as tears stream down my face. Adam places a kiss upon my head as he places his hand upon the backs of my children. “They are beautiful, Amelia.”

  I am not sure how long I have been laying here with my children in my arms. My room is finally as quiet as it can be. One nurse is here, checking me every so often. Adam is sitting in a chair beside me, on his phone. Two nurses walk into the room to bring my children to the nursery. Reluctantly, I let them be removed from my arms.

  Adam leaves the room, while my nurse helps me clean myself up. “Can I get you anything?” I hear the sorrow in her voice.

  All I can do is shake my head as I try to position myself comfortably in the bed.

  Adam enters the room with Grams. The dam of tears that I have been holding back, burst forth as I look into her sad brown eyes. I breathe in her floral scent as she wraps me in her warm embrace. Rocking me back and forth, as she rubs the back of my head, just as she did once before so long ago.

  By the time Dan, Grace, and Alex arrive, I am no better. They are all taking turns holding and comforting Grace and myself. I have lost my husband, and she, a son. Thankfully, Adam was there to tell them all that occurred outside the restaurant. Alex has not said a word since Adam finished. His hands keep clenching at his sides, as tears and anger fill his eyes.

  Doctor Pfaffenbach ordered a sedative, which I didn’t want. Everyone agreed that I needed the rest, Grams stayed by my side as I drifted off into a restless slumber. The image of him being shot is burned into my memory, playing on a loop every time I close my eyes. I awoke several times screaming Lucas’ name.

  Questions are rattling around in my mind, and I want the answers to them. But no one will tell me anything. How was my father not in prison? How could he be released and I not know? Why and how did he have a gun? Was he going to kill me? Why was he going to kill me?

  And Lucas, I know why you pushed me back. I know you took that bullet for me, but why? You know how hard this is going to be. To live. To live without you beside me. To raise our children, we were meant to do that together. I thought watching my mother die was hard and left me distraught. But watching you die, my love, my heart is broken. I feel numb to everything around me. I just want to be with you in your arms.

  Seventeen years, eight months

  IT’S BEEN A number of days since I saw my father and Ashley. They’re together? When? Why? I’ve been feeling sick since that night. I’m trying not to think about them, but Ashley has called my office asking for me, several times. Thankfully, Abigail was convincing that I was indisposed.

  Adam texted asking about lunch. It sounds crazy, but I enjoy spending as much time with him as I can get. We live together, so I thought it would diminish, but it hasn’t. During the weekdays, I enjoy our lunch breaks, when we can manage them together or with our friends. Yes, friends. I’ve begun to include Ben and Lucas as my friends.

  I stand, stretch my arms above my head, close my eyes and take a deep cleansing breath. When I open my eyes, Ashley is standing in the doorway to my office. “Is that how you prepare for a client?” she says is a smirking tone.

  How did she get in here? Where’s Abigail?

  “What are you doing here, Ashley?” I say in a disgusted tone. I never cared for Ashley in high school and I still don’t.

  “I know you’ve been avoiding my calls. You say you run an escort service, so you shouldn’t be that busy. So, you must still be taking on clients for yourself.” Oh, how I wish I could wipe that smug smirking look off of her face. But I am not going to bring myself down to her level.

  “I’ve been avoiding you. There’s nothing I have to say to you, or that you have to say to me. So, you can just turn yourself around and walk out.” I motion with my hands in a shooing manner.

  “There’s things that you need to know. About me and
Darren.” She’s still standing in the doorway, “We’re getting married.”

  “What?” I stare at her with my mouth agape. “You’re going to marry my father. What the hell for?”

  “We love one another. Have for a long time.” She sighs, “That is why we need to go have lunch, I’m going to be your mother.”

  I laugh. I can’t help it. How could she possibly think she will be my mother, she’s my age. I am clutching my sides I am laughing so hard. “You’re my age Ashley, so no, you won’t be my mother.” I wipe my eyes with the back of my hand. “Please leave my office.”

  Ashley must realize that I am not going to budge in her direction when she finally turns and walks away. Thank god! What did she think I was going to do, run to her with open arms because she is marrying my father? I shiver at the thought of them together. What is he thinking, she’s my age?

  My phone rings and I look to see Adam’s face. “Hi. I’m leaving the office now.” I say as I grab my purse and throw it on my shoulder while grabbing my coat. “I know I’m late, I got side tracked by someone. I’ll fill you in as soon as I get there.” I rush out the door.

  “I’m running a little behind also.” Adam finally says once I stop talking. “I’m headed out now, so we should meet at the same time.”

  “Okay. Just us?” I’m walking along the sidewalk talking on the phone while trying to put on my coat. I’m sure this is an entertaining sight, especially since I’ve almost dropped my phone twice.

  “AMELIA!” I hear my father’s deep voice, I look up and he’s standing in front of me.

  “Dad.” I’m staring into his cold hazel eyes; his features are stern.

  “Your father’s there?” I hear Adam ask on the phone.

  “Yeah, he’s…” I see my father raise his arm, aiming a gun at me.

  “I tried to get you to talk the other night, but you wouldn’t. So, there’s no point in trying to talk to you now.” My father was always stern and hard, but there’s something more in his tone today. Anger, hatred, or both.