Sacred Serenity (Lotus House Book 2)

by Audrey Carlan

  Atlas pursed his lips, leaned into the space between us. “And you and your girl haven’t sealed the deal yet, right?” He made a sliding into base type baseball gesture with his hand.

  I rolled my eyes. “Not exactly, no. Like I said before. She’s a virgin. Not that it’s any of your business, but we’re taking it slow.”

  “Have you talked about the future and marriage?” Atlas asked rather directly.

  I focused my gaze on his one blue and one brown eye. Something in those eyes didn’t sit right with me. “Man, what are you getting at? Why do you care?”

  He sighed. “Okay, look. One time, I was dating this girl. We were around twenty or so. I’d been dating her for six months and we’d fooled around, pretty much everything but you know…” He lowered his voice and leaned closer. “Intercourse. And come to find out, she was a hard-core, devout Catholic.”

  Atlas made his statement as though it held an answer to some giant secret.

  “So?”

  He huffed. “Man, from what I understand, women who are deeply religious may not give it up. Well, they will…”

  I cut him off. “Of course she will. We’re taking it slow.”

  “Did she say that or did you assume that?” he asked.

  That time I groaned and pressed back into child’s pose. My ass rested on my ankles, my knees were wide so I could lay my chest between my thighs, and my arms were stretched out in front of me flat on the mat. God, that felt good.

  “What are you getting at, Atlas? You’re talking yourself in circles.”

  “I’m saying, maybe she’s saving herself for marriage like a good little Catholic girl would.”

  At that, I lifted up and glanced at him. “Shut the fuck up.”

  He rubbed a hand over his mouth to stanch the flow of his laughter. “The fact that it hadn’t dawned on you why your hot, twenty-something-year-old girlfriend was untouched due to the possibility that her religion played a part in it is mind-boggling. You used to pick up on shit like this, man.”

  I rested my head in my hands and sucked in several slow breaths as the intensity of what he suggested slammed over my entire body. I focused on my Ujjayi, oceanic breathing, and let my mind go.

  Was Amber saving herself for marriage?

  What would I do if she said yes?

  Would she take that next step in our physical relationship without it?

  Is there a time limit on waiting?

  How religious was the woman I loved?

  Could she leave me over this?

  I pressed on my scalp and tugged at my hair until the pain reached the surface, releasing me of the fears that were running rampant inside. I needed to talk to Amber. “Fuck me!” I groaned.

  “Not in this lifetime, studly,” came a rich, sultry voice from behind us.

  I sat up and turned around. Mila Mercado, the feisty little teacher that every man wanted but nobody got, stood a few feet from where we’d set up. She stood all of five foot two and maybe a hundred pounds, all muscle, tits, and a toned bubble butt.

  “Hello, hotness,” Atlas drawled while getting to his feet. He held out a hand. “Atlas Powers. I’m one of the other Vin Flow teachers.”

  Mila studied Atlas with her chocolate gaze. “Hotness?” She frowned and ignored Atlas’s hand and looked at me. “Hey, you okay? You don’t normally start with the profanities until at least midway through the class.” She grinned.

  I stood up, wrapped an arm around her shoulder, and kissed the side of her mouth. She returned the gesture, kissing me back. Ever since I’d gotten in trouble for kissing Genevieve on the mouth, I’d changed up the way I connected with the single women in my world. That day when Trent punched me, I thought about how I approached women, and though I’d not had complaints before that day, I could see his side of things. Kissing was a no-go zone for most men. Just the thought of my Amber putting her perfect lips on another man made the green-eyed monster within me shudder in agitation.

  “Sorry, Mila.” I glanced around to make sure there weren’t too many people that had overheard me. It wasn’t professional to blast out an F-bomb, especially within the walls of the Lotus House Center. People came there to find solace and serenity, not profanity and vulgarities.

  She pinched her glossy lips together before tipping her head to Atlas. “Who’s curly?”

  I snickered. “Curly? Oh Mila, I’d kiss you again just for that if my girlfriend would approve.”

  “Curly? Curly? You’ve got to be kidding?” Atlas ran a hand through his mop of hair.

  “If the shoe fits,” Mila said.

  “I’d have you put it on and then wrap those legs around my waist,” Atlas shot back.

  Her eyes blazed white-hot fire and her perfectly shaped brows pointed down, much like devil forks. “How about I take it off and spike you with it?”

  Atlas took two steps closer, and I backed up, ready to watch the fireworks.

  “So it will be a stiletto.” He grinned and licked his lips. “Nice. Your legs will look a mile long in a pair of sky-high heels.” He leaned closer, his face only a few inches from Mila’s.

  I’m certain my eyes were the size of milk jugs, and I was afraid to take a breath for fear I’d screw up the animal sniffing or sparring these two were doing.

  Mila put her hands on her small hips and started walking around Atlas. “You think so, eh?”

  His eyes shifted, practically walking all over her tiny form. From her bare feet with red-painted toes, up her yoga pants to her bare midriff to her chest, where she wore only a sports bra to cover two healthy handfuls of fine womanly curves.

  Her eyes turned into steely points of irritation. “Did you just check me out?”

  “Hell yes, I did, wildcat. Your body is insane. You must work hard to look this good.”

  Mila’s lips curled up into the smallest smile. I noticed the brief slip in her bravado, but more importantly, so did Atlas. “I do. Work hard. Speaking of…get ready to be worked over.” Mila turned around swiftly, leaving Atlas off balance.

  “You could work me over any day, wildcat.”

  “Simmer down, man. Damn. I thought the two of you were going to catch fire circling around one another like that. Like oil and vinegar.”

  Atlas didn’t take his eyes off Mila when he spoke hoarsely. “Yeah, put us together and we taste fantastic on a salad. Shit man. That girl just got my number but good. I think I’m in love.”

  I shook my head and clapped him on the back. “Easy, boy. Mila’s a tough one.”

  “Challenge accepted. I’m all over that.”

  AMBER

  The halls were rather quiet as I made my way through the medical building toward the auditorium we used for my course in the Joint Medical Program at the UCSF campus. My boot heels clicked and clacked against the off-white linoleum surface. Usually, I wore my Nikes, comfort being priority when I had the potential of having to do class followed by grand rounds. Tonight, however, Dash was picking me up from school to take my family and me to dinner. Dinner wasn’t supposed to be a big deal, but it was to me. I didn’t need to look dolled up, but I wanted to for him.

  It had been two whole days since we’d had what I was calling our night of enlightenment. Still, the thought of what had occurred made my skin burn and gave me the giggles like a silly schoolgirl. Technically, I was still in school, even if it was to secure my MD.

  I’d spent the better part of two days aching inside for him. Every piece of my existence seemed hyperfocused and on edge. Needless to say, my clitoral vibrator was getting more use than previously. Dash and I both agreed that we needed to connect with the other people in our lives. It was easy to lose ourselves in a new relationship and forget about all the coming and goings of the rest of the world, especially when we were chest deep in love with each other. I wanted to be with Dash all the time, and when I wasn’t with him, I was thinking about him, wondering what he was doing, who he had in his classes, and how his day had gone.

  He admitted he had the s
ame clingy need I did. Which was why we’d agreed to take two days to connect with our friends and family. He’d mentioned that he wanted to go out with his buddy Atlas, take a couple classes at the center in his off time, and chat up his yoga buddies. I’d spent yesterday with Genevieve preparing the baby’s room. Baseball-themed, of course. Trent wouldn’t have it any other way. Then again, neither would her brother, Rowan, who was quickly following in his almost-brother-in-law’s footsteps.

  Genevieve was about ready to pop. We were now at the end of July, closing in on her August due date—if she made it a couple more weeks. The woman would not stop. She’d been teaching prenatal and gentle yoga classes all the way up until now. On top of that, she’d finished the rest of her coursework for cosmetology. What she didn’t know was that Trent had already bought her a salon around the corner from the yoga studio. She was going to be happy and pissed at the same time. Vivvie did not like things handed to her, preferring to earn everything she had in life. Something about the law of karmic debt. When she started in on the spiritual stuff and started quoting Deepak Chopra, I usually lost interest. It wasn’t that I didn’t believe…well, I didn’t really. What I did believe in was God. And I knew that God would make sure that Genevieve, Trent, and all the kids would live a happy and healthy life together.

  Tugging my book bag up my shoulder, I turned the corner to where the classroom was and found Landen leaning near the door, standing on one Converse-clad foot, the other perched against the wall. When he saw me, he smiled and pushed off the wall.

  “Hey you, where have you been? I haven’t seen you since we went to the pub.”

  “Oh, yeah. I had a conflict with class the other day and met with my advisor. Professor O’Brien approved it. Apparently, all the newbies have an advisor around this time to make sure they focus their goals and academics on the right area of study.”

  His eyes widened. “Did you pick one? A specialty?”

  I grinned and nodded. It seemed stupid, but I kind of wanted to tell Dash first. Nevertheless, I really was bursting at the seams to share.

  “Well, what did you choose?”

  “Guess?” I quirked an eyebrow and shoved at his chest playfully. Landen and I were buds. I think.

  He grinned and then tapped a finger on his lips. “Obstetrics and gynecology!”

  I shook my head. “Nope. Peds!”

  “Woo hoo!” he whooped, wrapped his arms around me, and spun me in a circle.

  I giggled, and he set me back on my feet but didn’t let me go. He held both of my biceps and ducked his head close to mine. “That is so fantastic. Are you happy?”

  “Yes and no. I’m still nervous I may have chosen wrong, but I couldn’t choose based on something that happened to my mother. I love kids. Want to have a gaggle of them.”

  He smiled. “You planning to have a big family with that man who picked you up? The giant who claimed to be your boyfriend?” His lips pinched together into a thin line.

  “I’m sorry about Dash. Yes, he’s my boyfriend. But that night, I don’t know. I was worried that we’d lost something, and he wouldn’t understand…ugh, I’m not explaining very well,” I said, my shoulders dropping down heavily.

  “It’s okay. I mean, hey, we’re friends, right?” He lowered his eyes to mine.

  I brushed a strand of hair away from his forehead. “Yeah, we’re friends. Totally.”

  “So then if you’re not available, you’ll just have to hook me up with someone as hot as you.”

  On that I laughed, hard, butting my forehead into his chest.

  “I’m serious!” He patted me on the back up and down before curling a hand around my jaw.

  I leaned back, looking into his eyes. They were lovely, like fresh-cut grass on a bright, sunny day.

  “You’re a hard one to beat, too, so you better find me a good one,” he finished.

  I tilted my head up, making sure he could see the sincerity in my face when I patted him over the heart. “Easy. You’re perfect to me. Any woman would fall all over herself to go on a date with you.”

  A loud booming male voice interrupted us. “What do you think you’re doing, Landen?” his father grated through a hardened jaw and clenched teeth.

  Landed pulled me against his side, wrapping an arm around my shoulders. I locked an arm around his waist, as uncomfortable with the professor’s tone as he was.

  “Dad, what’s your problem? Amber and I are just talking.”

  His eyes pinched together behind his thin-rimmed glasses. The curls in his dark brown hair had been cut close to his head, making his normally distinguished appearance more severe.

  “Talking?” He huffed. “That’s not what it looked like.”

  “Dad, it’s not what you think. And even if it were, who are you to say who I can and can’t date?”

  “I’m your father!” he warned.

  I could tell by the way his face had hardened and the blue vein that pulsed in his forehead that his father was beyond unhappy. Why, I didn’t know. Still I felt the need to butt in and clear up the misunderstanding.

  “Professor O’Brien, sir. I’m not sure what you think you saw, but your son and I are friends. Good friends. That is all. I have a boyfriend with whom I’m very much in love. Landen was just asking me to set him up. However, I wouldn’t mind knowing why you think I’m wrong for your son. Have I done something that has made you think ill of me? Because if I have, please give me the opportunity to clear it up. We have several more years together, and I’d rather not have that time tainted with a misunderstanding.”

  The professor’s shoulders curled in and slumped forward as he sighed. He pushed his glasses farther up his nose, centering them. “Amber, I’m sorry. It’s not you. We need to talk. Privately. Are you available after class?”

  “Is this about my mother?” I asked, deadpan. It was what I wanted to know most from him, and he’d steadily avoided it since the day he mentioned her name. I was pretty sure he’d gone out of his way to ensure we wouldn’t discuss it.

  His eyes widened, and his entire face paled the same way his brother’s had the other night in the bar.

  “Landen, go on in. I’d like a word with Ms. St. James.”

  “Are you going to be nice, Dad? Seriously. She deserves better than the way you’ve acted around her.”

  He took a long breath. “Yes, son. She’s safe with me, and you’re right. She does deserve better. Hopefully, we can work some of that out. Go on in.”

  Landen tugged me to his side and laid a friendly kiss on my temple. I watched as his dad’s nostrils flared. “I’ll be just inside if he starts being a brute again. Okay?”

  I chuckled and patted his arm. “I’m fine, buddy. See you in class.” He left me alone with his dad, who did everything but speak to me for a full two minutes. He shuffled his feet, adjusted his collar, shook the coins in his pants, all while I waited, arms crossed over my chest, trying desperately not to scream or shake it out of him.

  Eventually, I couldn’t wait any longer. “Are you finally going to discuss your problem or whatever your issue is with my mother? She’s dead, Professor. It’s not like she’s going to rise up and haunt you or anything.”

  He shook his head and coughed into his hand. “Just like her. Quick wit and so damn bright. You know you’re probably the smartest student in the class?”

  “Um, okay.” That being a bit of information I’d fist pump to later, like when sitting down to dinner with Dash and my grandparents tonight. “I’m sorry, but what does this have to do with my mother and your reaction to me because of her?”

  The professor rubbed at the back of his neck and looked off to the side. “Amber, it has everything to do with your mom. Because if what I suspect is true, a lot is about to change.”

  Right then, two of the girls from class scuttled up to us in a rush. “Sorry we’re late, Professor. Won’t happen again.”

  He sighed and opened the door. “Can we continue this after class?”

  A little n
iggle of dread tap danced its way up my back and settled on my shoulder. “Yeah, that’s fine, but my boyfriend will have to come. He’s picking me up for dinner. I’ll call my grandparents and change the time. Would an hour be fine?”

  His lips pinched together. “Yeah, that should work fine. Thank you for waiting, Amber.”

  “I feel like I’ve been waiting my whole life.” I wanted to add…to learn about my mother when the words he said under his breath, just loud enough for me to hear, sent a stone the size of my car crashing on top of my chest, cracking my ribs open, and flattening my heart to a gooey mess.

  “Me too.”

  Chapter Fifteen

  Weak sacral chakras can be found in individuals who have sexual problems, lack desire or ability to experience pleasure, including orgasms or erectile dysfunction. Weaknesses may also present in a person through illness with the bladder, penis, uterus, and back. There are mental concerns to be cognizant of, as well such as irrational behavior, jealousy, and anger issues.

  AMBER

  Dash arrived right at the tail end of class, as planned. He was waiting for me in the hall. I could see him through the open lecture hall door, his tall, muscular frame in a pair of black dress slacks and a lavender button-down shirt, sexy as sin. He looked positively edible leaning against the wall opposite the door, as could be attested to by the gaggle of women copping a look-see, flirting, or attempting to make eye contact as they passed him in the hall.

  The best part was, he didn’t even give them a second glance. His eyes were on me and only me as I took each step slowly toward the top of the stairs to the exit.

  “Hey, Cosmo.” I smiled huge, unable to contain it. “You look handsome.”

  He winked and made a show of rolling up the arms of his dress shirt to display those golden forearms with the light smattering of dark blond hair. Yum.

  “As do you, Dr. St. James.” He lifted an eyebrow, ramping up his sex appeal times about a gazillion.