Owl and the Tiger Thieves

by Kristi Charish

  While one held up the burlap bag, the other held out his hand and blew. A spray of bright-pink dust blew in my face. Then they did the same to Artemis. I blinked, once, twice, three times, then sneezed. My eyes crossed and wouldn’t uncross. Oh hell, no, not again.

  I didn’t get a chance to finish that thought as a sweet-smelling bag was dropped over my head, lowering me into a drowsy darkness.

  Why the hell does no one ever listen to me?

  15

  POT, MEET FRYING PAN

  Thursday, maybe evening. And my head still hurts.

  My eyes opened to three flickering orange flames suspended over me. I watched the wax pill and drip down the candles for a while, until my vision cleared and the three of them melded into one.

  Rock wall, cold dirt floor, a pail off to the side, and a metal grid door. I closed my eyes again. Fucking fantastic. Another prison. Definitely not the way I’d hoped to find Muziris.

  Oh man—this was what? Prison for the second time in two weeks? That had to be some kind of lottery win . . .

  “Congratulations. The Tiger Thieves decided not to kill you on sight,” Artemis said.

  Here we go, Owl: one, two, three—using the wall I pushed myself up. No nausea, but ooooh, did it ever bite. My eyes crossed but thankfully didn’t double up. I was getting old hat at mitigating death-defying headaches.

  I tested turning my head until I saw him in the corner across from me, his head lowered, his arms wrapped around his legs. His leather pants, expensive boots, and shoes had taken on more dust and made him indistinguishable as a rock star and almost unrecognizable as himself. “Do I get a medal?” I asked.

  “I’d keep the jokes. Just because you’re alive doesn’t mean they have anything pleasant in store for us, let alone are willing to cooperate.”

  As though I hadn’t heard that from the supernaturals before. Nothing smarted, there were no new bruised ribs, no shackles . . .

  “Why do I get the distinct impression Shiva has a bone to pick with you?”

  “A lot of people have a bone to pick with me. It’s a very long and detailed list.”

  That wasn’t an answer.

  “Really,” Artemis continued, “the chance you’ll be dead in the very near future is about the only thing I’m willing to bet on at the moment.”

  I tested my legs. Both worked, and there was no mysterious pain in them either. “They can get in line.” There were no restraints, but the bars of the door were flat and gridded in a tight pattern. Hard to maneuver your arms around—and even if I had been able to, the lock was on the other side as well, and even if I could reach it, I didn’t have anything to pick it with.

  “Or I suppose Rynn could get here before they make up their minds. Just burn the place down around us, stride in, and take whatever the hell he desires.”

  “A little less pessimism,” I told him. “And can you please explain to my compounded headache why you failed to mention that the Tiger Thieves were your long-lost buddies?”

  I could just make out the twitch of his lips in the candlelight. “It’s a little more complicated than that,” he said.

  Isn’t it always? “Enlighten me.” When there was no answer forthcoming, I tried a different approach. “Well, they’re not human.” Thinking back to the woman’s dark eyes and the presence she’d had looming over us, there was no way she was run-of-the-mill anything.

  Artemis inclined his head. “No,” he admitted. “But they’re not entirely supernatural either.”

  I stopped my examination of the bars and peered at him. “How does that work?”

  Artemis’s face was unreadable in the dim light. “Partially.” I could hear him hedging his answer. “They’re what you would call half-breeds.”

  “Half-breeds?”

  His green eyes flickered in the candlelight. “Offspring of supernaturals and humans or different breeds of supernaturals. The ones that never inherit a full set of either parent’s powers. It happens more frequently than the supernatural community would have you believe.”

  I frowned. “But you said—”

  “Incubi and succubae can breed with humans, but that doesn’t always lead to a full-blooded incubus or succubus offspring; every now and again you get a half-breed. Oh, they inherit something—a long life span, powers of some sort, some physical characteristics—but never enough to make them one of us. The Tiger Thieves are their society—a middle ground, if you will. Outside the influence of supernaturals or humans. I’d heard they’d taken over this city centuries ago. Apparently the reports were right, though they’ve kept to themselves—more than they used to.”

  From the tone I gathered that that was a point of contention. “How come no one has ever heard of a half-breed? I mean, there have got to be . . .” I trailed off as it hit me. “Grendel in Beowulf.”

  Artemis’s smile was chagrined. “Very good. It’s the humans’ version of the fable, but it’s close enough. There was a dragon, and she did have many sons with the Nordic chiefs, more out of boredom, I suspect, than anything else. The most famous of them were abominations.” He inclined his head again. “Shiva’s not quite that bad, but she’s close.”

  The Tiger Thieves had policed supernaturals and humans alike along the Silk Road—at least that was what the stories said. “They’ve got to have some kind of power in order to have given all of you the finger.”

  “And believe me, they revel in it,” he said, almost under his breath. “Stories like Beowulf tend to miss the part where they take issue with their parents.”

  Well, maybe the Tiger Thieves and I had more common ground than I would have thought. “Where did they take my cat?”

  Artemis just snorted.

  I opened my mouth to ask again, but the sound of feet scraping against stone stopped me. A lantern approached us, carried by a humanlike hand. The pair of eyes that reflected the dim light like a cat’s, though, were far from human. The guard came up to the cell and held the lantern against the grate to get a better look at us, his eyes lingering on me with an impartial stare.

  Artemis jostled me. “I’d stand up if I were you,” he said, and promptly took his own advice.

  I followed his lead, groaning as I pushed myself from seated to standing. They might not have beat me up, but they hadn’t exactly been gentle when they were sticking me in here—then again, maybe they weren’t used to handling fragile humans.

  The guard exhaled sharply, and Artemis stepped back, hands up and behind his head. The guard hissed again in what I figured was an order for me to do the same. Not wanting to start an argument with his large fists, I did.

  The jail cell swung open. “Right on schedule,” Artemis said. Hands still behind his head, he stepped out. I did the same. The guard motioned for both of us to walk in front of him, then followed close behind.

  “Normandy,” Artemis said, after we were away from the cell.

  The man behind us only grunted. Artemis wasn’t dissuaded.

  “I thought you’d have tired of this outfit by now. You always struck me as having more sense than Shiva.”

  “You know them?”

  Artemis jabbed me in the arm. “Come on, you can’t seriously tell me you’re happy locked up in here?”

  Still no answer. “Just think of all the opportunities passing you by. Why, with your battle cries and penchant for overly dramatic fights, you’d be a shoo-in for the fiasco the humans call professional wrestling. Lots of spandex, shiny costumes—no bloody Viking battles, but still—”

  Normandy growled, “If you don’t shut up, Shiva has said I can take your tongue.”

  Artemis laughed, loud and sounding just a little mad. “Yes, I suppose she would say something like that.”

  Whether he was crazy enough to keep challenging Shiva’s guard didn’t get answered as we reached the end of the tunnel.

  There were lights, rows and rows of them, both lanterns and candles lining the cavern wall. It looked as if every free nook and cranny had been filled, the white w
ax dripping down and forming eerie wax stalactites, the oil flames staining other places black with soot. The cavern itself had been shaped into a dome, images and pictorial scenes carved into the rock, none of which I was able to get a good look at.

  People, easily a hundred or so of them, stood in the domed cavern, encircling a platform as if it were a coliseum and they were attending a play.

  Or a trial, my wandering mind offered. I shoved that idea back down. The people were packed into the entrance so thickly that I couldn’t see through them to the center of the cavern.

  One by one they turned, watching us. I swallowed. “Ah, hi there—” I started. I almost bit my tongue as the guard, Normandy, shoved me in the back, sending me forwards into the crowd. They stepped aside, forming a path to the center, where none other than Shiva sat on a thronelike slab of rock. This time she was dressed in clothes that more befitted a warlord: head-to-toe black leather, visible weapons, and gold jewelry adorning her body and hair. Her face was bare, though, except for a jeweled eye painted on her forehead. If it hadn’t been for the fact that I knew she wasn’t entirely human, I’d have thought she was too young to be the leader of the Tiger Thieves.

  In case I hadn’t gotten the message the first time, a shove in the small of my back served as a reminder. I stumbled forwards. “Walk, head up, even pace. They’re very concerned about appearances—particularly ones of guilt,” Artemis whispered.

  I walked down the path with an even pace until I was standing before Shiva. Her eyes were just as black and dark as I remembered them, her thick hair plaited with gold into a braid that rested on one shoulder. There was nothing forgiving or understanding in those eyes but nothing overtly cruel either, which surprised me. Being tossed into enough cages and backed into enough tight spots over the years, that’s what I’d come to expect.

  She didn’t exactly look a picture of kindness, though, as she turned her dark stare first on me, then on Artemis. I distinctly noted a hardening in the look she gave him and a twitch of her mouth, not far from bared teeth. I searched the crowd, but there was still no sign of my cat. That made me more nervous than anything else.

  “What are you doing here?” Shiva demanded.

  I had to give Artemis credit: if he was scared of her, he didn’t betray himself, not one bit. “I’ve escorted the lady here to negotiate with you,” he said.

  Shiva’s mouth turned down in the start of a frown, and her eyes narrowed at him. Then she turned them on me. “Is this true?”

  I swallowed. That was not the direction I’d expected this to go in. I glanced at the Tiger Thieves, staring down at me. All of them seemed to hold me in their sights, waiting with bated breath for my answer.

  “Ah—yes,” I said, surprised at how small my voice sounded.

  A murmur spread through the crowd. I turned to Artemis. “What the hell did I just say?” I whispered.

  “The Tiger Thieves have rules. They have to hear what you want to negotiate before they can execute us for trespassing.”

  “Execute us for trespassing?” I asked, earning a shove from behind from Normandy. “When the hell did that get put on the table?” I whispered.

  Artemis frowned at me. “You wanted to reach the Tiger Thieves no matter what, yes? Well, trespassing, then begging for them to cooperate and not kill us, was the only way I could think of.”

  Thank you so much for enlightening me . . . “What about the damn amulets? I thought they were an invitation.”

  “No, not really.”

  Shiva hit the stone floor with a stick and silence descended over the cavern. “We’ve heard the request to negotiate and will hear the penitent’s plea,” she said, her low voice echoing around the room.

  All eyes turned on me.

  Great, just fantastic, the talking had been left to me. I swallowed. Well, let’s hope things didn’t go as they usually did with supernaturals. Maybe the Tiger Thieves had a different, more accommodating disposition . . .

  “Ah—yeah.” Inside I winced at the way the words sounded: hesitant, lacking confidence. I cleared my voice and pushed on, “I’m here to ask for the Tiger Thieves’ help freeing someone from a cursed suit of armor.”

  Another murmur traveled through the crowd.

  I looked at Shiva. “The Electric Samurai,” I said. “Maybe you’ve heard of him? He’s a danger—” I trailed off at the look Shiva gave me. The neutral expression was gone, replaced by something else: contempt.

  I spun around. I was getting that look from all corners. “What? What the hell did I say?”

  Shiva smiled as one might at a child. “We’re well aware of the armor and the victim. We’ve even heard of you, Alixandra Hiboux.” She leaned forward. “The Electric Samurai is your boyfriend, no?”

  I glanced at Artemis. He shook his head ever so slightly. I turned back to Shiva. “No—I mean, yes, but not since the elves stuck him in the armor. And what the hell does that have to do with anything?”

  Shiva arched a dark eyebrow at me. “Tell me, do you enjoy being a perpetual victim of the supernatural?”

  Victim? “Okay, not a victim here—”

  “The vampires? The elves? The dragon? Forgive me, but you epitomize a victim. The only thing I see in front of me is someone who needs to be saved from herself.”

  This was a tangent I hadn’t expected. “That’s a little harsh and kind of unrelated, don’t you think?”

  Shiva snorted. “Not from where I’m standing. And make no doubt about it, Hiboux, be careful with what you say next, because I am in charge. Be happy I don’t revel in victimizing humans like the men you’ve surrounded yourself with. It’s not your fault.”

  It wasn’t my fault? For a second I was speechless. I’d dealt with a lot of misogynistic assholes throughout my career—real misogynists, the ones who knew their female students were doing the work better than their male cohorts but favored the guys with publications, good digs, and all the credit anyway. They were assholes first and foremost and would have probably been assholes even if they’d been feminists . . . I wasn’t arguing the existence of misogyny. But this was the first time I’d been labeled as some kind of systemic victim of it. Oddly, that made me feel more of a victim than anything else, especially because of the way she was looking at me, with a mix of pity and patience.

  Damn it, she felt sorry for me. And feeling sorry for someone only breeds contempt. Especially when the person you feel sorry for asks for something.

  Shiva wasn’t done, though. “Argumentative, unpleasant, devoid of mediation skills—oh, we’ve heard of you. I really can’t blame you; you are possibly the easiest target I’ve come across. You should consider working on that. It might help you avoid as much trouble as you attract.”

  “You’re really taking things out of context here— Shit.” I glared at Artemis, who’d just jabbed me with his elbow. Be careful what you say. “Look, just—forget about me for a minute. Rynn is a threat to everyone, humans, supernaturals, everyone.”

  This time she lowered her head, reminding me of Captain before he’s about to charge a toy. “So you’d like us to defeat him for you? Rescue him? Or rescue you?”

  “I’m not asking you to defeat him for me, I’m asking for your assistance. Hell, I’ll even take information at this point.” I turned so I was facing the guards. “You used to defeat supernaturals on the Silk Road, no? Tell me how you did it. How do I nullify the Electric Samurai’s power? That’s all I’m asking for.”

  There was another murmur in the crowd, and I felt the tension palpable in the air. Everyone seemed tense except Shiva, whose eyes narrowed at me.

  Shit, what had I said? Where had the misstep been?

  She didn’t leave, though, or tell them to throw us back into the cell. She waited for the murmurs to cease. “All you need is for us to stop him?” she asked.

  In for a quarter, in for a pound . . . I nodded.

  “You know there is a price for any assistance the Tiger Thieves offer?”

  “Anything—oo
mph!” Artemis kicked me. I kicked him right back. He was in no position to be dictating the way this negotiation went, not after he’d landed us in a cell.

  “Look, tell me what the cost is. If it’s within my power to pay, I’ll do it.”

  “Your request is granted.”

  I knew I’d stepped deeper into things from the way Shiva smiled at me but looked at Artemis. Artemis swearing beside me also indicated that something had gone wrong. But I hadn’t seen any other way out.

  “Shiva, stop playing games with her. If you plan to punish me, get it over with,” Artemis said.

  “Hold him,” Shiva said. Armed Tiger Thieves emerged from the shadows and grabbed hold of Artemis, restraining him.

  Then two of the Tiger Thieves grabbed me. It wasn’t friendly. “Wait—I thought we had a deal?”

  Shiva looked at me, her face unreadable. “Oh, we do.”

  Rough hands steered me towards a pedestal in the center of the cavern. A human-sized birdcage was lowering from the ceiling.

  Oh, that was not what I’d been hoping for . . .

  I dug in my feet, but it did me no good. I hit the inside of the metal cage face-first and heard the door clang shut behind me. “This does not look like an agreement!” I shouted.

  “Ah, yes, well, the price for our assistance is your life.”

  “Shiva, you’re being unreasonable,” Artemis said, warning in his voice, though how the hell he figured he could do anything . . . If he did have something up his sleeve, he needed to do it now.

  “Considering she broke one of our sacred rules, it seems very reasonable to request her life. Especially since I’ve granted her request. You can’t deny the fairness in that—Father.”

  Father? What the hell?

  “Oh, for— What sacred rule? She’s barely been here five minutes.”

  Shiva stood, looking more imposing than she had yet as she yelled at Artemis, “Imprisoning one of our sacred creatures is punishable by death!”