Into Each Life

by Shelia E. Bell

  chapter 20

  Joy and Pain

  Faith stood sideways in front of the oval mirror surveying her huge round stomach. The stretch marks coursing up and down her brown belly were barely noticeable. The twins weren’t due for another two months, but because of the increased risk of complications associated with a multiple birth, Dr. Sampson placed Faith on bed rest when she reached twenty four weeks. Other than the bed rest, Dr. Sampson told the happy couple that everything looked fine.

  Faith lay in the bed feeling exceptionally down about being away from the kids at the Academy. Prodigal, understanding how much Faith missed being away from Unity Academy and the students there decided he would do something to lift her spirits. He contacted the Assistant Director of the Academy and arranged for some of the students to visit Faith. When the nine girls and boys walked into the house, Faith’s whole face beamed. They brought her pictures they had drawn and bracelets they had made just for her. The children sang songs and also ate lunch with Faith. By the time they left an hour and half later, she was exhausted, but she couldn’t stop thanking Prodigal for his thoughtfulness.

  “Sweetheart, I love you so much. I’m sorry I’ve been so edgy lately,” she told him.

  “Don’t worry about it. I understand, Faith. I love you too.” He climbed up in the bed beside her and began to gently rub her belly. Then moved his head down to her belly and placed light kisses all over.

  “Girl, you know I’m hooked on you,” he told her between kisses. “You know you got me right where you want me.” He lifted his head and moved up closer to her and began nibbling on her chin, then pecked her tenderly on the lips.

  “I can’t wait until you have our babies. I miss making love to you so much. I don’t know how much longer I can wait. Shucks just looking at you makes me all excited.”

  “You old horny dog you. You better wait.” She could barely contain her laughter. She leaned carefully over the side of the bed and picked up a paisley throw pillow and plopped him up side his head.

  “Okay, woman, you better watch out. You’re getting ready to start something. Just remember, I have the upper hand because it’s going to take you a long time to get up out of this bed,” he grinned.

  “That’s alright. You just wait until after the babies come. I’m going to get you good.”

  “I sure hope so,” Prodigal said with a mannish grin etched across his face. “Faith Runsome, I love you girl. You hear me?”

  “Yeah, I hear you. And I love you more.”

  ♦

  Faith’s body contracted as she felt a sharp pain on the left side of her belly. Using both hands, she gently massaged her rotund belly, talking to the babies while doing so.

  “What are you up to in there?” Faith crooned. “Mommy can’t get any sleep,” Faith spoke gingerly. She tried using her hands to reposition the babies but to no avail. Another sharp pain hit her and Faith cried out in the dark empty house. She glanced over at the clock. It was 1:30 a.m. Prodigal’s shift at the fire station wouldn’t end for another six hours. Moments later, Faith screamed out in pain as another strong contraction stabbed her. Feeling around in the bed for the cordless phone, her hand trembled as it met up with the cold, hard phone. The next contraction was so strong that it almost rendered her speechless when she heard Prodigal pick up.

  “Faith, honey are you alright?” Prodigal exclaimed on the other end

  “I, I think it’s time,” she struggled to speak as a river of tears rolled down her face. “Send the ambulance, honey,” she said before another contraction forced her to drop the phone on the bed.

  Faith arrived at the hospital with Prodigal running beside the stretcher. There was some concern about Faith and the babies since the twins weren’t due for another two months. After hours of strong contractions, the babies still refused to come. The doctor made the decision to perform a caesarean. The identical twin boys, Kevin and Kaleb, made their grand entrance into the world, weighing less than three pounds each.

  Prodigal didn’t chance calling Teary with the news of the twins’ birth from Faith’s hospital room. He opted to wait until Faith succumbed to sleep before going to the hospital lobby to make the call. From the hospital pay phone he called Teary but didn’t get an answer on her home phone. He left her a message before catching the hospital elevator and returning to the bedside of his wife.

  ♦

  Teary and Skyler’s relationship remained in trouble. The one thing Skyler wanted more than anything in the world, she was unable to give him. She had listened to the message from Prodigal telling her about the birth of his sons and though happy for him, she couldn’t fight the sense of depression she felt. For the past two years she had tried every conceivable thing imaginable to get pregnant, from maintaining a healthy weight, eating the right foods, keeping up with her ovulation cycle, and taking her body temperature three times a day. Debra told her that taking a tablespoon of Geritol daily could boost her chances of becoming pregnant. Teary proved that theory wrong.

  Every day Skyler grew more on edge. Rather than support his wife, he taunted Teary when she told him about the birth of Prodigal’s twins. As weeks turned into months and months into years, he realized that it was highly unlikely that Teary could give him a child. To make matters even worse, their sex life dwindled quick, fast and in a hurry because Teary often complained about experiencing pain whenever they did made love. She didn’t know what was happening to her body but she was scared to death. She decided to make an appointment to see a fertility specialist. She had to do whatever it took to give Skyler a child.

  Debra and Chelsia accompanied Teary to the office of fertility specialist, Dr. Leland Spelding, who’d been highly recommended by a co-worker of Debra’s.

  “Mrs. Jenkins, you say that you’ve been experiencing painful sex for most of your marriage?”

  “Yes, doctor,” Teary responded with her head held down.

  “You’ve never discussed it with your regular doctor or gynecologist?”

  “No, I haven’t. Look, Dr. Spelding, I don’t mean to sound rude, but I don’t want to discuss my personal reasons for not going to a doctor about this. All I can say is that I’m here now talking to you about it. I need to know if you can help me.” Teary sounded as though she was quickly becoming agitated with Dr. Spelding.

  Dr. Spelding couldn’t believe what he was hearing. This lady was obviously desperate to have children but, on the other hand, she hadn’t discussed her physical condition with her own doctor. Studying the classy dressed and attractive Teary Jenkins, he said, “Let me ask you if you are experiencing unusual pain during your menstrual cycle.”

  “Yes, I am.” Teary was glad she had asked Debra and Chelsia to come along with her. She was too nervous and frightened to be alone. And she didn’t want to tell Skyler just yet, not until she knew for sure whether or not there was something wrong with her. “My periods are lasting longer too. I don’t know what’s going on with me, Dr. Spelding. But I need to get whatever it is diagnosed and then fixed. My biological clock is ticking and my husband and I want children badly.” Teary’s voice was on the verge of breaking. Dr. Spelding sensed her desperation.

  “I understand, Mrs. Jenkins. I’m going to do whatever I can to help you and your husband. By the way, is your husband also here with you today?” He asked the question more out of curiosity than necessity.

  “No, he’s out of town on a business trip,” she lied. Debra and Chelsia looked at each other then over at Teary. She cut her eyes slightly and arched her eyebrows as a signal for them to keep quiet.

  Dr. Spelding asked her a series of questions, analyzed her urine, drew blood, and then decided he needed to perform more in depth tests.

  “Mrs. Jenkins, I can’t tell you what’s going on inside of your body without further tests. You said that your husband has already been tested for fertility and that everything is fine with him?”

  “Yes, that’s right.”

  “First, let me tell you that sometimes it ca
n take years for a couple to conceive. Stress, anxiousness, diet and exercise can all be contributing factors as to why you haven’t become pregnant. It could be that it just isn’t time for you and your husband. But having said all of that, I do want to perform a few more tests while you’re here today.

  “Why more tests?” Teary inquired.

  “Mrs. Jenkins, some of the symptoms you described are the same as those attributed to endometriosis, but without additional tests, I won’t be able to tell you anything more.” Teary’s eyes bulged and her mouth flung open. She looked over at her friends and shook her head from side to side in shock and disbelief.

  “Endometriosis? Doctor, I’ve heard of that disease. If I have endometriosis that means I won’t be able to have children. It can’t be. I know that it’s not that.” She fought back the teardrops that were trying to push themselves out the corner of her eyes. Debra and Chelsia stood up and gathered around her. Debra took hold of Teary’s hand while Chelsia patted her on the back.

  “That’s not always the case,” Dr. Spelding explained to Teary. “There are women who still conceive after being diagnosed with endometriosis. Plus, I didn’t say that you have it. The symptoms you’ve explained to me can mimic a number of medical conditions. That’s why I’d like to do an extensive pelvic exam. We’ll talk more after that. Ladies, do you mind going into the waiting area for a few minutes, please?” he turned and said to Debra and Chelsia. Dr. Spelding opened the door and motioned with his hands for the ladies to follow him. “Mrs. Jenkins, my nurse will be in shortly to prep you.”

  “Thank you, doctor,” Teary said as she tried to mentally prepare herself for whatever was next.

  After the painful examination, and an hour and a half later, Teary was called back into the doctor’s office. She beckoned for Debra and Chelsia to come along with her.

  “Mrs. Jenkins, the pelvic examination indicates some abnormalities in your womb,” Dr. Spelding started. “I also felt some irregularity and inconsistencies in the tissue behind your uterus. We call that tissue the cul-de-sac. Based on my experience, I want to be up front with you. We might very well be looking at endometriosis. If you’re prepared to stay, I’d like to do an ultrasound, which will allow me to make a concrete diagnosis one way or the other. If the ultrasound reveals endometriosis, then we’ll talk about an in-hospital procedure called a laparoscopy. But let’s take it one step at a time. Dr. Spelding’s pager buzzed. “If you’ll excuse me, I’ll be back shortly. I have to answer this page.”

  “I don’t believe I’m hearing this,” Teary said as her eyes began to water Debra and Chelsia were at her side trying to keep her from breaking down.”

  Chelsia spoke first. “Teary, hold on, girl. Don’t jump to conclusions. He’s just trying to rule out anything serious.”

  “It’s easy for you to say, Chelsia. You have two children already. Faith just gave birth to twins. And I can’t even get pregnant with one.”

  “Teary, it’ll happen, you’ll see. Just hold on.” Debra interjected. “Look at me. I don’t have kids so we’re both in the same boat.”

  “No we aren’t. It’s different for you, Debra. You’ve never really wanted kids. I do. You know Skyler desperately wants children.”

  Dr. Spelding walked back into the room. “Sorry about that interruption. I’ve spoken with my nurse. We can do the ultrasound in about thirty minutes. Is that okay with you? He asked.

  “Thirty minutes will be fine,” Teary replied. She then turned to her friends. Why don’t you all go and get you something to eat? I’ll call you when I’m ready or I can just catch a cab home when I’m done,” she told them.

  “No way are we leaving you here. We can all get something to eat after this is over,” Debra responded.

  “We’ll be in the waiting room if you need us,” Chelsia explained.

  “Okay, thanks. You guys are the best.”

  They turned and walked off, feeling sorry for Teary’s situation.

  The nurse came in and instructed Teary to follow her down the hallway. Lifting her office gown, the nurse rubbed the cold gel over Teary’s belly. Dr. Spelding began moving the ultrasound instrument slowly over her stomach, sides and down to her pelvic area.

  Dr. Spelding talked to her to help her feel more at ease. “Have you had an ultrasound procedure done before, Mrs. Jenkins?” he asked Teary.

  “No, this is my first one. Please Dr. Spelding. I want to get this over with as quickly as possible. And you’ll see that I don’t have endometriosis. I know it.”

  The procedure ended and Teary was allowed to get dress. She returned to the waiting area where Debra and Chelsia still patiently sat. The three of them waited until Teary was called back into his office yet again.

  Dr. Spelding’s suspicions were right. Teary Jenkins definitely had endometriosis. He felt sorry for the beautiful but frightened woman. He dreaded breaking the news to her.

  Soon Teary’s name was called. She cautiously went back into the exam room and sat down in the chair instead of the exam table.

  “Mrs. Jenkins,” Dr. Spelding said, entering Teary’s examination room.

  “Please doctor, no more formalities. Call me Teary,” she somberly replied.

  “Okay. Teary, I’m sorry.”

  “No, don’t say it. Don’t tell me that I have it. Please don’t tell me that.”

  Debra and Chelsia heard her screams from the waiting room. They both rushed into the exam room. Teary was hysterical.

  “Please, Mrs. Jenkins. Calm down, please,” the doctor pleaded. “Nurse, administer a Valium intravenously to Mrs. Jenkins.”

  “Yes doctor,” his nurse answered. “Right away.”

  Chapter 21

  Some Things Are Meant To Be

  Dr. Spelding performed laser therapy to destroy any traces of endometriotic implants without damaging any of Teary’s surrounding tissue, while also allowing Teary and her husband to attempt to conceive. However, almost a year had passed since the procedure and Teary was still unable to get pregnant.

  Dr. Spelding explained to the couple that if he performed hormonal therapy, it would take another nine months or so of treatment. But Teary’s time was running out. Skyler’s attitude toward her had changed for the worse. He started staying away from home for longer periods of time, sometimes not bothering to come home at all.

  In the first years of their marriage, Skyler had focused his energies on getting his life together in preparation for the start of a family. He stopped stripping and instead managed to secure a job as a patient care representative at the Medical Center while going to school at night to complete his physical therapy degree.

  When Teary told him the news about her closed womb, it didn’t take long for him to return to his old ways. No matter how much Dr. Spelding told them that she might still be able to get pregnant and conceive a child, Skyler convinced himself that Teary would never be able to give him the family he longed for.

  ♦

  “Hi, Faith, how is everyone doing?” Teary said into the phone, trying to sound happy but was having a difficult time.

  “We’re fine, Teary. How are you? It’s been a while since we’ve talked.” Faith still found it somewhat difficult to erase her mind of the jealous emotions that Teary was able to stir up. She put on a front the best way she knew how by continuing to be as nice as she could whenever Teary called. “I hope you’re calling with some good news. You’re pregnant aren’t you?”

  “Unfortunately, I’m not, Faith.”

  “Oh, I see. Are you alright? You sound a little down.”

  “Sure, I’m fine. I was wondering if Prodigal was home?”

  “Yes, he’s in the garage tinkering around with something out there. Hold on, I’ll get him.”

  “Thanks, Faith. It was good talking to you.”

  “You too, Teary,” Faith replied. She stopped preparing dinner long enough to go to the garage door and tell Prodigal that Teary was on the phone.

  Prodigal dashed inside and picked up the
cordless phone Faith had purposely left lying on the kitchen counter. Faith pretended not to be bothered as she started seasoning the chicken. Her ears however, were fine tuned to what Prodigal was saying on his end. She could only guess Teary’s part of the conversation.

  “Hey you. What’s going on with you, woman? Long time no hear from.”

  Prodigal had stopped calling Teary from home like he used to do. He mostly emailed her or waited until he was at the station to call her. Though he hadn’t come right out and told her about Faith’s feelings concerning their relationship, Teary sensed that things weren’t as peachy as they once were between him and Faith. She didn’t want their friendship to cause a rift in his marriage, so she had eased up from calling him too. But today, she couldn’t help herself. She had to talk to him.

  “Hey, yourself. What were you doing out there in the garage? Messing something up?” she laughed.

  “Me? Naw, I’m putting together a couple of bikes for the boys.”

  “How are Kevin and Kaleb anyway?”

  “They’re great, growing like weeds, that’s all; and eating us out of house and home.”

  “I heard that.”

  “What’s up with you? You okay, Teary?”

  “No, I’m not.” Teary broke down and started to cry.

  “Hey, hey, talk to me. What’s going on?”

  “Prodigal, I’m tired. I’m frustrated and my marriage is falling apart.”

  “What?” Prodigal gasped though he wasn’t surprised. “What happened, Teary?”

  “I can’t have children, Prodigal. It’s no use in believing that I can anymore. Look how long Skyler and I have been trying. He wants the one thing I can’t give him. Now I think he’s cheating on me.”

  “That low down dirty bastard.”

  “It’s not his fault. It’s mine, Prodigal. I can’t give him what he wants most, a child.”

  “That doesn’t give him a license to go out and cheat, Teary. And anyway, who says you can’t have children? Didn’t that doctor say there was still a chance that you could get pregnant?”