A SEAL's Purpose

by Cora Seton

She let go of the keys, and Evan took them.

  “Good luck,” she told him. “I hope you two are very happy in Rome.”

  “I hope you come and visit us really soon. Your sister misses you already.”

  “I miss her, too.”

  He backed up a step. “You’re sure?” He raised the hand that held the keys. “You want me to list it?”

  Addison was as sure as she’d ever been in her life. “Yes.”

  “Some night, huh?” Avery said the next morning.

  Kai grunted. She was the first person he’d seen since he’d gotten up at the same time he’d always done, did his yoga routine, meditated—rather unsuccessfully—and gone for a run. He’d slept alone last night. He didn’t know where Addison had slept—probably on a flight to New York, back to her sister’s penthouse. Her prize for fooling him.

  He was prepping breakfast, as usual, but he wondered if he was wasting his time. The whole camp seemed to have decided to sleep in after their late night.

  As for Addison—he didn’t even want to think about her. Everything she’d done was fake. Everything she’d said.

  She’d never been serious about him at all.

  He kept running back over their time together in his mind, trying to figure out what parts were real and when she’d been acting. It must have all been an act, he finally concluded, because he couldn’t find a way to distinguish one set of her behaviors from another.

  “Breakfast will be in about a half hour,” he said shortly.

  “I didn’t come for food. I came to talk.”

  “Not much in the mood.”

  “I can see that.” But Avery didn’t leave. Instead, she popped up onto the counter, legs swinging.

  Kai turned and glared at her.

  She didn’t budge.

  “Say what you have to say.”

  “I think you’re making a mistake. Addison might have come here on a dare or something, but she fell in love with you.”

  Kai grunted again. He didn’t think so.

  “You need to—”

  Kai’s phone buzzed in his pocket, and he pulled it out. “Kai here,” he said when he’d answered it.

  “Kai! It’s Linkley. Want to have a little chat about your pilot.”

  “Uh… sure.” This wasn’t what he needed, but he didn’t have a fiancée anymore. He didn’t want to lose his cooking show, too.

  “The studio was really pleased with what they saw. They want to run with the show. Ten episodes for the first season.”

  “That’s… great.” It didn’t feel great, though. He wondered if anything ever would again. “Really—that’s great,” he said again, trying to sound more enthusiastic.

  “Just one thing,” Linkley went on.

  Kai gripped the phone so hard he thought it might shatter. One thing? He didn’t think he could take one more thing. Not when the woman he’d thought he loved had turned out to be a liar and fraud. “What’s that?”

  “This… subtext you’re trying to push. It’s got to go. You read the teleprompter and you stick with the program. You’re not a comedian.”

  “I wasn’t trying to be,” Kai said slowly.

  “Improv’s not your best skill,” Linkley said. “But you look good. The studio really likes the way you look.”

  Kai tried for a reply. Couldn’t come up with one. He looked good? What the hell did that mean? He was trying to change the world; who cared how he looked while he was doing it?

  “The business is the business, kid. You understand? Don’t try to outsmart it. Roll with it. Do what you’re told. Can you do that?”

  “I… I’m excited to work with you, sir.”

  “We’ll send the paperwork.” Linkley hung up before he could reply.

  “Who was that?” Avery asked when he pocketed his phone.

  “I got my cooking show. Ten episodes.” Kai turned back to the meal he was preparing, and for the first time in his life, he didn’t feel like cooking. He braced his hands on the counter and bowed his head.

  Fuck. First Addison, now this.

  Avery jumped down and came to stand next to him. “Tell me.”

  “It’s not going to be my show at all. They’re going to kill my brand before I even get started. I’m going to end up a spokesman for all the things I don’t believe in.”

  “Then don’t do it.”

  “I may not get another chance!”

  Avery surveyed him. “Go ask Addison. See what she suggests.”

  “Addison’s gone.” The sentence stuck in his throat, and Kai swallowed hard.

  “She’s in her tent,” Avery contradicted. “Sleeping off her hangover like everyone else. Boone found her another sleeping bag. Seems you had hers.” She smiled. “Talk to her. No, better yet—listen to her. Hear her side of the story. You might learn something.”

  “Addison’s in her tent?” But why? She’d gotten the keys to the penthouse she so desperately wanted.

  “Because she loves you,” Avery said simply.

  “No, she doesn’t.”

  “Yes, she does. Maybe this all started with some stupid deal she made with her sister, but then it turned into something else. I’ve seen the way she looks at you, Kai. She’s not faking that. Give her a chance.”

  For one long moment, he almost agreed, but then he remembered everything Felicity said. Remembered the way Addison had thought the show was fake.

  She hadn’t come here to marry him.

  It was time to move on.

  When Addison woke up, she had one blessed second before all the events of the previous evening crashed into her consciousness. She groaned and pulled the sleeping bag over her head. She wasn’t sure why she’d thought she could fix things if she stayed. She’d slinked out of the ball, Avery and Maud assuring her they’d take care of everything, and after making a half-hearted attempt to find Kai had simply gone to bed.

  “Addison?” a female voice said outside.

  “Mmm?” she managed.

  “Come on. Let’s go to the manor.” It was Riley.

  Addison wanted to ignore her, but she had a feeling Riley wouldn’t stand for being ignored. Against her better judgement, she climbed out of the sleeping bag, gathered some clothes and opened the tent flap.

  It was a long trudge up the hill. Thankfully, Riley didn’t seem to need to talk. At the manor, Riley ushered her upstairs.

  “Take a good, long, hot shower,” she said. “You’ll feel better. I’ll help you dress. Then you can go find Kai.”

  Addison hesitated by the bathroom door. “Maybe I should just leave.”

  “Honey, you’re not responsible for how your sister behaves,” Riley pointed out. “We don’t want you to leave.”

  “But Felicity was right,” Addison felt compelled to say. “I did come here because I wanted her stupid penthouse.”

  “And then you fell in love with Kai, right? And everything else about Base Camp. You had a blast putting on the ball, didn’t you?”

  “Yes.” Addison wondered if she’d ever be able to say that word again without thinking of her time at Base Camp.

  “Then that’s that.”

  “You think it’s really so simple?” Addison leaned against the doorframe. “I’m not sure Kai will see it that way.”

  “You won’t know unless you ask him.”

  “But—”

  “He loves you, too,” Riley insisted. “Now, take your shower, we’ll get you dressed and we’ll go find him. Together.”

  Addison did so, and when she was ready, she and Riley walked down to Base Camp in silence, Addison fighting off tears. She’d gotten to know every step of the path between the camp and the manor. She loved this walk. Loved all of it.

  Loved Kai.

  Was she about to lose everything?

  “There he is now. Looking for you, I’d say.” Riley pointed to Kai exiting the bunkhouse. Addison swallowed hard as Kai spotted them and stopped. He waited for them to reach him, and Addison’s gut tightened as they approached. Would
he yell? Swear? Tell her to pack her things and go?

  Several cameramen grouped around them, and she wished to God they could have this conversation alone, but maybe this was a type of humility, baring your mistakes in front of the world. Maybe other people could learn from the mess she’d made of things.

  Kai bowed his head, and when he looked up she read resignation in his eyes. “Would you walk with me?” he asked.

  “Yes.” Addison bit her lip when he winced. Every yes now seemed fake, no matter how heartfelt it was, and it must sound fake to him, too. He was pissed. He was going to ask her to leave. She couldn’t imagine what her life was going to look like without this place—

  Without Kai.

  They turned toward the track that led down to Pittance Creek. Addison wasn’t sure whether to break right into an explanation, or wait—

  “Avery says I should talk to you,” Kai said stiffly.

  Addison nearly quailed at how distant he sounded but forced herself to speak up. “I want to apologize for what happened last night.”

  “Can you explain what’s really going on? I’ll try to listen.”

  He was making an effort to hold back his anger—and pain, Addison thought. It hurt so bad to know she’d hurt him, especially when she knew the ways he’d been hurt before. Why had she been so careless with the love of a man like this? She deserved everything she got, but first she was going to fight to change his mind.

  “Just like Felicity said, it all started with a book. The Freedom of Yes.”

  “I’ve heard of it.”

  “Well, I was reading it. And Felicity saw it and started teasing me. She’s always saying I’m too uptight. That I plan too much. Worry too much. While she just goes and gets what she wants. It was the same weekend she told me she and Evan were moving to Rome. I guess… I guess she was trying to distract me from that. Distract both of us. She was afraid of leaving—I didn’t realize that then.” Tears stung her eyes. “I should have been paying more attention.”

  “So, you were reading a book.” He wasn’t going to let her off easy. Addison took a breath and went on.

  “She kept at me. Dangled her penthouse in front of me, said I could have it—if I said yes for one month. She was leaving, and I was going to be stuck in Connecticut, living a life I didn’t like—”

  “And you agreed to that.”

  “I agreed to that.” She wished she could say otherwise. Shame flared through her at the mess she’d made.

  “Whose idea was it to apply to marry me? Felicity’s?”

  Addison nodded.

  “Did she… did she make you dress like you did in the audition tape?”

  Heat suffused Addison’s face. “Yeah, she did. She bought me the clothes I wore here, had my hair and makeup done. She controlled all of it.”

  Kai seemed to consider this. “How do you normally dress?”

  “Well, I’m an insurance actuary, so I—” She broke off when Kai tilted his head back and guffawed. “What?”

  “Oh, man. The Universe is fucking with me. Big time!” He continued walking, shaking his head, and after a moment Addison caught up. “The whole idea of my ad was that for once I was going to pick a sensible woman. A safe one. A practical one. I guess that’s what I got.”

  “Who do you usually date?” Addison wasn’t sure what to make of that. She was sensible, but she didn’t know about… safe. That sounded so boring.

  “Women who knit caps for surfers. Which, let me guess: you don’t actually do.”

  “Nope.” She waited a beat. “So, I’m not the kind of woman you even like.”

  Kai was silent a minute. “That’s not true. I liked you a lot, right from the start. Even though you weren’t knitting.”

  “I liked you a lot, too.”

  He stopped, and Addison waited. “Maybe fate knew what it was doing after all,” he said quietly.

  “Maybe. Kai, I’m sorry for all of it. I never meant to hurt you. Felicity and I really did think the show was staged, and the moment I arrived none of that mattered anyway. I fell for you fast.”

  Kai stilled. “Did you?”

  She felt heat rise in her cheeks. “Actually, I fell for you a long time before that. I’ve watched the show since the first episode. I’ve… daydreamed about you a lot.”

  Kai cocked his head. “Really?”

  “Really. So when Felicity suggested applying… it was her idea, but I went along with it. I never dreamed you’d pick me.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because I’m not… Felicity.”

  Kai frowned. “Who cares about Felicity?”

  “I mentioned she’s a supermodel, right?”

  “She’s not you.”

  Addison’s heart skipped a beat. “I’m just a regular person.”

  “But are you a regular person who thinks she could spend her life with me—here, at Base Camp?” He shifted closer.

  Addison nodded.

  “Are you sure? There aren’t any penthouses here,” he cautioned, drawing her into his arms.

  “There are tiny houses, though, and they’re even cooler.” She braced her hands on his chest, loving the feel of his embrace. She’d thought she’d lost this. She could hardly believe she might be wrong.

  “What about being an actuary? Could you really leave all that behind?”

  She rolled her eyes. “I know what I want to do now. Run the B and B—if the women will let me.”

  “What about that rich husband Felicity thinks you were hunting for? I’m no millionaire.”

  “I don’t need one. I only need you.” She tilted her chin up, and when Kai met her halfway, kissing her so thoroughly Addison became dizzy, she knew she was getting another chance at happiness. She braced her hands on his shoulders, loving the strength of him.

  “Are you sure?” Kai asked one more time when they parted again.

  “Absolutely. I love you,” she said.

  “I love you, too.”

  Chapter Thirteen

  ‡

  It was late that night when Kai finally got to be alone with Addison, and by then he was tight with anticipation and worry. He believed Addison when she said she wanted to stay, but the last twenty-four hours had shaken him more than he cared to admit. He needed to feel her in his arms, to make love to her to prove to himself she was still here.

  They’d climbed into his tent together, and he’d freed her from her gown and corset, but instead of stripping off her shift and getting into their sleeping bags, Kai told her there was something he wanted to show her.

  They waited, talking quietly, until the camera crews had gone and the camp had settled in for the night before Kai wrapped Addison’s warm winter coat around her, lent her some socks, slung the sleeping bags over his shoulder and led her back out into the night.

  Their breath puffed white plumes of steam into the cold air, and they hurried toward Pittance Creek, quickly shedding their boots and climbing into the joined sleeping bags when they reached its banks. Kai had positioned them so that they could see an expanse of sky between the trees—an expanse that included a clear sight of a nearly full moon.

  Like before, he pulled out two pairs of binoculars and handed one to Addison, then helped her with the settings.

  “Take a look.”

  Addison gasped in surprise when she did. “I can see the mountains and craters on it!”

  “Isn’t that cool?”

  “I never knew you could do this—I thought you needed a telescope.”

  “A telescope is even better,” he admitted.

  “But this is great, too.” She gazed at it for a long time before turning to him. “Thank you. I could have lived a lifetime in the city and never thought to do this.”

  “You’re welcome.” He took her hand and they went back to viewing the moon, until by some unspoken agreement they decided it was time to put the binoculars aside. When Addison turned to snuggle against him, Kai’s heart settled into a slow beat. Addison had stayed with him. She’d h
ad the opportunity to live in a penthouse in New York City, and instead, she’d stayed.

  “I’m glad you’re here,” he told her.

  “I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be,” she admitted. “Kai, you realize you’re my dream man, don’t you? You’re the one who was supposed to be unattainable.”

  “Is that a bad thing?”

  “Well, if this dream of mine can come true, what else might happen?”

  “You tell me. What else are you dreaming about?”

  She was quiet for a while. “Throwing parties. Lots and lots and lots of parties. Weddings, anniversaries, baby showers, corporate events…”

  “I have a feeling that might come true.”

  “And babies. Someday I want babies.”

  Kai’s arms tightened around her. “I was hoping you’d say that.”

  “Were you?”

  He nodded and found the hem of her shift then tugged it up and over her head. “I think we need to practice.”

  “That sounds smart.” He heard the smile in her voice. “We wouldn’t want to mess it up.”

  “No, we wouldn’t.” He lifted one of her perfect breasts and bent down to trail a kiss over its softness. Addison sighed and arched closer to him. “Addison,” he breathed against her skin. She angled her head to meet his kiss, and they spoke no more for a long time.

  Addison welcomed Kai’s touch like the desert welcomed rain, opening up to his explorations without any hesitation. The way he worshipped her body told her everything she needed to know about their life together. Kai didn’t take things for granted, and he cherished the good in the moment. His awareness of the natural world only added to her instinct that he would remain present and thoughtful in their life to come.

  Every time they were together, she felt alive, bathed in a sensuous flow of emotions. Kai teased her, awakened her libido and satisfied her in a masterful way. He made her want to stay here with him in these sleeping bags forever, the moon shining down on them, the soft sounds of the forest around them.

  But he was quickly coaxing her body to the brink, and Addison dug her fingers into the fabric of the sleeping bags, trying to hold on a little longer, enjoying the sensations he was awakening within her too much to want to let go.