Worth the Trouble (St. James #2)

by Jamie Beck

  I’m the only one for you. Cat’s eyes widened in recognition of the phrase she’d read in big block print. “You sent those anonymous love notes, didn’t you?”

  He hesitated before confessing. “Yes. Being cut off from you was killing me. I had to remind you of what we have.” He still held her arm, tugging her closer, eyes pleading yet determined. “I know you feel it, too, even if you’re still afraid. I promise I’ve changed. Forgive me so we can start over.”

  “I’m sorry, Justin. I don’t feel anything.” Cat shrugged her arm, but couldn’t break free. The memory of the media frenzy surrounding their breakup flashed through her mind, urging her not to cause a scene. The last thing she needed was ugly new headlines surfacing days before the trade show. She had to diffuse him carefully. “It’s over. If you really care about me, please let me go.”

  Her heart jumped as he yanked her against his body. The flicker of anger hardening his eyes, the tight grip on her arm, the sound of his heavy breath near her ear, all caused her to go limp. Justin rested his cheek against her head to inhale the scent of her hair. When he shivered, she nearly threw up.

  “It’s not over, Cat.” His voice quaked with repressed fury, and then he whispered in her ear like a lover, “It’ll never be over.”

  Unable to find her voice, which was as paralyzed by fear as her body, Cat closed her eyes.

  “Hey!” Hank’s voice cut through Cat’s panic. Out of nowhere he’d arrived and now glared at Justin. “Is everything all right here?”

  “Just a lovers’ spat. Nothing to worry about.” Justin didn’t spare Hank a glance. “Cat, tell him.”

  “Justin, no—” she began, but Hank interrupted.

  “I think it’s time you let her go.” Hank didn’t reach for Justin, but rather appeared to be assessing the situation to determine the safest way to save her, just as he’d done at David’s reception.

  “Oh, do you?” Justin smirked, now turning his attention to Hank. “And why should I care what you think?”

  “I’m not as easy to bully as a woman half your size, you son of a bitch.” The vein in Hank’s temple pulsed and Cat notice a streak of red traveling up his neck. “Step away now so no one gets hurt.”

  Justin’s expression turned incredulous and mocking. “Who the hell is this clown, Cat?”

  She met his gaze. “My partner.”

  Wrong move.

  Justin snapped his head toward Hank. His eyes narrowed as he studied Hank’s clothes and face. In her peripheral vision Cat noticed a few passersby slowing their pace, taking notice of them. She ducked her head, hoping to avoid recognition.

  “You’re the guy on the website. The carpenter?” Justin turned from Hank and looked at Cat. She winced as Justin gripped her bicep harder. “And you? Getting your kicks with the blue-collar class these days?”

  Jealousy had caused him to lower his guard and turn his back on Hank for a moment. In a rush of movement, Hank twisted Justin’s arm behind his back. The roses fell, lying splayed on the sidewalk, as Hank brought Justin to his knees.

  Justin released Cat in order to break his fall. He shoved his elbow back toward Hank’s torso, but Hank twisted to miss the blow. In the midst of the struggle, Hank’s fist connected with Justin’s right eye.

  Hank leaned over Justin, waiting.

  Justin rolled onto his back and spat at Hank, missing him by an inch. “I’m going to sue you for assault, you bastard. Nobody sucker punches me and gets away with it.”

  Oh perfect, her ex and Hank sharing a jail cell. She could see the headlines now. All she wanted was to get the hell off the street without involving cops or lawsuits.

  “If you sue Hank, I’ll notify the police about the letters you sent, Justin.” Cat kept her eyes on Justin. “Breaching the restraining order and assaulting me in broad daylight will land you in jail this time. Or you could finally move on and let this, and me, go. Your choice.”

  Hank bent over Justin, reaching under his arm and lifting him to his feet. “Time to apologize and say good-bye.”

  Justin shrugged free of Hank’s grasp, straightened himself, and swiped his hand over his hair to push it from his forehead. Hatred seethed from his eyes when he turned on Cat. His voice dripped with sarcasm. “I’m so sorry. Please forgive me, my love.”

  “Stay the hell away from her!” Hank barked.

  “With pleasure,” Justin rejoined. Before he strode away, he crushed the roses under his heel and sneered at Cat. “You’ll look back on this one day and realize what a mistake you made.”

  “Is that a threat?” Hank stepped in front of Cat.

  “No, it’s just the truth. She’s out of your league, and she’ll realize it sooner or later. Then she’ll be back at my door.” Justin leaned to his left to catch Cat’s eye. “Don’t wait too long, love, or that door might not be open.”

  Cat’s adrenaline spike ebbed as Justin stormed off, causing her body to shudder. Hank snatched her into his arms and held her until the tremors subsided. “Let’s get inside,” he said, then slid an arm around her waist and walked her to the apartment.

  Her mind replayed the past several minutes, so she didn’t speak.

  As the elevator doors closed, Cat finally said, “I didn’t expect you to still be here. You said you’d be gone . . .” her voice broke at the thought of wondering what she would’ve done had Hank not arrived.

  Hank encircled her with his arms. “I’d just taken the last of my equipment to my truck. I came back to drop off your key and leave a note.”

  “I’m glad you did.” Tears formed in her eyes. “I hope no one recognized me and snapped a photo. I want the focus to stay on our furniture, not my love life.”

  “Isn’t any publicity good publicity?” When she didn’t laugh, Hank used his key to unlock her door. Once inside, he asked, “Cat, where’s your phone?”

  “In my purse. Why?”

  “You should call the cops, and call David about getting another restraining order.”

  “No cops.” Cat searched for her phone. “I’ll call David, though.”

  She pulled up her favorites list and selected David’s cell phone number.

  “Hey, Cat!” Vivi’s voice chirped.

  “Hey, V,” she paused, surprised that Vivi had David’s cell on a work day. “Is David around?”

  “He’s in the shower. Headed to the airport soon for a quick business trip. What’s wrong? You sound funny.”

  “I need his help. Justin showed up today. He was the one sending those letters.”

  “I knew it. Oh, I knew it, Cat.” Cat heard a jostling sound as if Vivi were in motion. “Did he hurt you? Are you okay?”

  “I’m okay. But I need to talk to David.”

  Cat heard Vivi pulling her brother out of the shower and giving him the quick rundown.

  “I’ll be over in five minutes,” came David’s blunt response once he took his phone from Vivi.

  “No need. Hank’s here. Besides, Vivi said you’ve got to catch a flight. I only called so you could get the process started. Justin came by, admitted to sending me the anonymous notes I’d been receiving, and then ended up getting into a fight with Hank.”

  “What anonymous notes?” She heard David curse on the other end of the line.

  “Please don’t snap at me,” Cat said in a tiny voice before explaining the notes to David. “Justin admitted to sending them.”

  “He broke the terms of the restraining order. It prohibited any contact.”

  “I know. That’s why I’m telling you.”

  “What happened today?” he asked.

  Her voice cracked as she recounted the skirmish with Justin. “But listen, David. I don’t want him arrested, I just want him kept away. Another arrest will bring publicity I can’t afford right now, and it could cause him to sue Hank for assault. If Hank ends up in jail, that will kill our business before it gets off the ground. Not to mention that we don’t want Hank to be spending time and money on defense attorneys.”

&nbs
p; David fell silent for several seconds. “Okay. I think you can go through family court to get an order of protection without involving the cops. I’ll pull the old file and ask someone to get things started. You probably have to appear, but maybe you and Hank can just provide an affidavit, given the past history with Justin. I can’t promise no publicity, but we can avoid an arrest.”

  “Do whatever you can. Thanks.”

  “You’re welcome. I’m glad you weren’t hurt. Can I speak with Hank for a minute?”

  Another shudder passed through her from thinking about the high wire she’d just walked with Justin. She’d felt trapped by fear of him, of being hurt, of bad publicity. Every choice could’ve been a misstep.

  While Hank spoke with David, Cat stumbled into the kitchen to get a drink and calm herself. The cool water soothed her throat. After setting the empty glass in the sink, she bent over and drew several deep breaths.

  Two years.

  She’d wasted two years—two potentially fertile years—on that maniac. How many other foolish choices had brought her to this point . . . twenty-eight, damaged goods, lost, afraid?

  “Are you okay?” Hank stepped behind her and rubbed her shoulders. He then embraced her from behind and kissed the side of her head. “I think I’ll stay for a while, until you’re settled.”

  She turned in his arms. Squeezing her eyes shut, she burrowed into his chest, clinging to him. Wonderful Hank, who rode to her rescue despite the way she held him at arm’s length. “I’m sorry you got sucked into Justin’s BS. I wish I’d been smarter when you and I first met. So many things would be different now.”

  “Don’t apologize.” He cupped her face.

  “I know I frustrate you. I probably even hurt you sometimes, although that’s the last thing I want. See! I’m a mess, Hank. You deserve so much better. God, you must regret the day Vivi tricked you into looking at my closets.”

  “Regret it? I treasure it.” His warm gaze melted the anxiety from her body, easing the tightness in her muscles. “Don’t you get it? When we’re together, I see a future that isn’t only about taking care of everyone else. It’s exciting and irresistible, just like you. And seeing you smile is well worth whatever trouble you or Justin stir up.”

  Cat’s heart welled up with the unspoken promise in Hank’s words. Would he still be there once the luster wore off? Once he learned the truth?

  She’d started with a good plan: casual lovers, maybe good friends, and a new career. The reasons for that plan hadn’t changed, but now her heart begged for more. So much more. She’d been fighting its demands, for his sake and hers. Yet, in Hank’s arms, her willpower fled.

  She lifted her head and kissed him.

  The brief appearance of his little dimple warmed her soul. He kissed the tip of her nose. “I’ve got something to show you.”

  “I’ll bet you do.” Cat tugged at the waistband of his shorts.

  “I’m talking about your closets.”

  “All done?”

  “Uh-huh.” He grabbed her hand and tugged her down the hallway. “And I’ve got a surprise.”

  “I love surprises.”

  Although she’d been marking his progress for weeks, she gasped at the beautiful end product. Thin mirrors were inset within the polished bird’s-eye maple doors. Crystal hardware provided a touch of elegance to the cabinetry.

  “It’s perfect, Hank.” She noticed he’d tossed her decorative bed pillows in the window seat to make it look pretty. “I love everything about it except for the fact that I now have a lot of unpacking and organizing to do.”

  “Open them up and look inside.” He stood back with his arms folded across his chest. “That’s the surprise.”

  She opened one of the doors. “Oh my God!”

  Her clothes hung in the closet. Within seconds, she’d opened the other doors and drawers, each time shrieking. He’d organized her wardrobe. She spun on her heel and ran to the old closet. When she flung open the bifold doors, she found all of her shoes and handbags neatly aligned on the various shelves. Clapping her hands, she twisted around. “You’re amazing!”

  Her smile was so wide her cheeks hurt. She charged at Hank and pushed him onto her bed. “Really, Hank. You’re amazing.”

  His breathing escalated immediately. He weaved his fingers through her hair and pulled her on top of his body, kissing her with long, hungry sweeps of his tongue. Her own breath felt shallow as she hastily removed his shirt. His touch felt like home.

  “Catalina,” he whispered as his mouth lingered at the sensitive spot below her ear. “Tell me this means as much to you as the business.”

  “No talking. Just kiss me.”

  He paused, as if deciding whether to press for an answer. Then his dimple reappeared on that left cheek. “I loved unpacking your lingerie. Show me what you’re wearing today.” He nuzzled the spot beneath her ear and she felt the corners of his mouth curl in anticipation of her reply.

  “My favorite color.” She weaved her fingers through his hair.

  His head popped up, and he eagerly shoved her shirt up to peek. Delight enveloped his features when he exposed a fire-engine-red bra with pink ribbon accents. “Red’s my new favorite color.” He slipped his finger inside the bra to push it out of the way before he began kissing his way down her chest.

  “Mm,” she murmured.

  Slowly, Hank stripped her clothes away until they were both naked on her bed. She savored the scent of his skin, the feel of his hard muscles beneath her hands, the heaviness and heat of the friction created as they moved against each other.

  He rolled on top of her and smiled. “I’ve been picturing us in this bed since the first time I saw this room.” He kissed her again. His damp, hot breath whispered against her ear as he nibbled on her earlobe. “I can never get enough of you.” She felt his erection pressing against her thigh and reached for the thick shaft. He groaned as the muscles in his back rippled, making her feel sexy and powerful.

  “Me on top.” She rolled him over. “Hands above your head.”

  Hank’s intense expression indicated he was restraining his impulse to take her quickly. He grabbed the top of her headboard as her tongue stroked the centerline from his chest to his navel.

  Hank was huge and hard—intimidating—but she’d never backed down from anything, so she sucked him into her mouth as deeply as she could.

  “Cat!” Hank swore. The muscles in his arms bulged. His knuckles whitened against the edge of the headboard. His head fell back and groans of pleasure tore through his chest.

  She cupped him and pumped him with her mouth while his body writhed beneath her. Within a minute she felt his hands on her head.

  “Catalina,” he uttered while yanking her up the length of his torso. He growled something unintelligible before plundering her mouth with his tongue.

  In two seconds, she was on her back with him buried inside her. He watched her face intently. With each thrust of his hips, he exclaimed her name in passionate, rasped whispers until they exploded together in a dizzying orgasm. Afterward, he cuddled her against his body and stroked her hair.

  She felt lazy, happy—an unfamiliar contentedness unique to being with Hank. She closed her eyes, determined to enjoy it without analyzing it further.

  Cat lay in the afterglow of lovemaking until a sprig of panic twisted through her mind, puncturing her short-lived sense of peace.

  Justin had caused her to fear men. Her diagnosis had caused her to fear commitment. Now Hank was causing her to fear being alone.

  He made it all but impossible to resist the pull in her heart—the thrilling sense of falling from a cliff with the security of landing gently in warm water. She owed Hank better than withholding her affection, than withholding the truth.

  But keeping quiet allowed this little bit of happiness to go on. He liked her, might even be falling in love with her, but could she hold on to a man who so clearly valued family when she couldn’t give him one? Wouldn’t that only bring them both pa
in?

  Hank lifted onto his elbows and kissed her eyelids. “I meant to take my time, but you knocked me off my game with your little power play.” His expression suddenly shifted to one of concern. “What’s wrong? You look upset. Is it Justin?”

  “It’s not Justin.” She closed her eyes, unprepared to have a serious discussion.

  “Is it us?”

  She opened her eyes, and swallowed hard, but words wouldn’t come.

  “Stop running from me, Cat. I won’t hurt you or let you down or lie or whatever the hell all the other men you’ve known have done to make you so wary.”

  His gaze never wavered, but hers did. “You think you know me, but I’m not the glamorous, confident woman in magazines.”

  “I don’t want her, Cat. I like you best when you let your hair down, like the night we met, or the time I found you scrubbing my mom’s mirror, or watching you joke around with your brother. That’s the woman I love. Fancy clothes and pictures don’t mean a thing to me.”

  A brief smile curled her lips. The woman I love. But then she remembered her huge secret. “Maybe, but there are other things you don’t know. Things I can’t change. Things that aren’t so easy to accept.”

  “We all have flaws. Trust me, Cat. Let me in.”

  Hank deserved someone who wasn’t afraid of commitment. Someone who could embrace her own emotions. Someone completely, unselfishly honest.

  Even if Cat found the courage to become that better woman and even if he thought he loved her enough to give up biological children, would he regret or resent that choice later?

  And if she really loved him, how could she even consider putting him in that position?

  “You don’t understand.”

  “Then explain it better.” But he stopped pressing when a tear ran down her cheek. He wiped it away. “Sorry. Don’t cry.”

  He kissed her. “I’ll wait until you’re ready to talk. Just remember, whatever it is you think I can’t handle, you’re probably wrong. Look at my life, look at what I’ve borne for the people I love.”