Bumper Book of Humphrey's Tiny Tales 2

by Betty G. Birney

  Then he gave the wheel a spin and the bell hit the clip.

  DING!

  ‘I don’t believe it,’ Richie said.

  He spun the wheel again.

  DING!

  ‘It works!’ Richie grinned, giving the wheel another spin.

  DING!

  ‘I don’t know what happened,’ he said. ‘But I’m glad it’s fixed now.’

  Richie wasn’t the only one who was GLAD-GLAD-GLAD!

  *

  Once we got to school, Richie and all the other students in Room 26 set up their projects.

  ‘Og, you’re not going to believe what happened,’ I told my froggy friend.

  ‘BOING-BOING!’ he answered.

  Og sounded concerned, so I said, ‘Don’t worry, Og. It turned out well in the end.’

  Then Mrs Brisbane asked my friends to explain their science projects.

  It was unsqueakably interesting to learn from Heidi that plain water froze faster than sugar water. And the salt water didn’t freeze at all!

  Sayeh showed us the beans she’d grown.

  The beans that had received the most light grew the best.

  And the colourful mould that Gail had grown in her fridge was amazing!

  Finally, it was Richie’s turn.

  He explained his experiment to the class.

  Then, he took me out of my cage and placed me on my wheel.

  ‘Why don’t we all get a little closer so we can watch?’ Mrs Brisbane said.

  I was HAPPY-HAPPY-HAPPY to start spinning.

  DING-DING-DING!

  The bell rang every single time the wheel went around.

  DING-DING-DING-DING!

  ‘Look at him go!’ Lower-Your-Voice-A.J. shouted.

  Golden-Miranda cheered me on, too. ‘Faster, Humphrey, faster!’

  ‘I think Humphrey needs a rest,’ Mrs Brisbane said. ‘But you’ve done a wonderful job, Richie!’

  As the wheel slowed down, I looked up at Richie.

  He had a huge smile on his face.

  I think I had a huge smile on my face, too.

  (Some humans think that hamsters don’t smile, but we do.)

  ‘Good job,’ Kirk told Richie. ‘But I still think you should have turned Humphrey into a monster!’

  I like Kirk a lot, but I didn’t agree with him.

  I just want to be a helpful classroom hamster who goes home with my classmates at the weekend.

  I love going home with my friends.

  Even friends who have very playful puppies!

  a frog, is the other classroom pet in Room 26. He makes a funny sound: BOING!

  is a grownup who cleans Room 26 at night. He’s a special friend who always brings me a treat and seems to understand my squeaks better than most humans.

  is our teacher. She really understands her students – even me!

  is the head and the Most Important Person at Longfellow School.

  has a loud voice and calls me Humphrey-Dumpty.

  has golden hair, like I do. She also has a dog named Clem. Eeek!

  has a hamster named Winky!

  is Mandy’s pet hamster and one of my favourite pals!

  I think you’ll like my other friends, too, such as Wait-for-the-Bell-Garth, Speak-Up-Sayeh, Stop-Giggling-Gail and Pay-Attention-Art.

  It was Friday afternoon in Room 26 of Longfellow School, and I was spinning on my hamster wheel, trying to stay calm.

  Fridays are always exciting … especially for me.

  Every Friday afternoon, I get to go home with a different classmate.

  It’s the BEST-BEST-BEST part of my job as classroom pet.

  Of course, Mrs Brisbane already knew whose turn it was, because she plans my visits with the parents.

  But sometimes she forgets to tell me.

  Who would it be this week?

  Would it be Lower-Your-Voice-A.J., whose whole family likes to talk?

  Or would I go to Speak-Up-Sayeh’s house, where everyone speaks quietly?

  ‘Mrs Brisbane, who is taking Humphrey home?’ Heidi Hopper asked.

  ‘Raise-Your-Hand-Heidi,’ Mrs Brisbane told her.

  Heidi forgets to raise her hand sometimes.

  ‘I am!’ Mandy Payne said. She forgot to raise her hand, too!

  ‘That clock must be stuck. It’s taking forever to get to the end of the day,’ Mandy complained.

  Don’t-Complain-Mandy-Payne used to complain about a lot of things.

  But since she got her own hamster, Winky, she doesn’t complain as much.

  ‘I can’t wait!’ I shouted.

  My friends giggled, even though all they heard me say was ‘SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK!’

  Just then, the clock hand moved and the bell rang.

  The end of the day had finally come!

  My friend Og splashed loudly in his tank.

  He’s a classroom pet, too, but he doesn’t go home with students at the weekend, because he doesn’t have to be fed every day, like I do.

  ‘I’ll tell you all about my weekend at Mandy’s when I get back,’ I squeaked.

  ‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ he replied, hopping up and down.

  He makes a funny sound because he’s a funny frog.

  Soon Mandy’s mum arrived to pick us up.

  ‘Humphwee!’ a tiny voice shouted.

  It was Mandy’s little brother,

  ‘Hi, Bwian,’ I squeaked back.

  His name is ‘Brian’, but he calls himself ‘Bwian’.

  Mandy’s younger sisters, Pammy and Tammy, rushed up to my cage.

  ‘I’m going to take care of you, Humphrey,’ Pammy said.

  ‘No, I’m going to take care of you, Humphrey,’ Tammy said.

  The girls are twins, but they don’t look at all alike.

  ‘I’m going to take care of Humphrey, because he’s my classroom pet,’ Mandy said.

  It wasn’t easy, but soon Mrs Payne had all four children, my cage, my food and me in the car.

  It took forever to get to the Paynes’ house.

  Then, Mrs Payne had to get all four children, my cage, my food and me into the house.

  That took even longer.

  But at last, my cage was on a table in the living room, right next to Winky’s cage!

  ‘Hi, Humphrey!’ Winky said.

  When Winky was born, one of his eyes didn’t open, so he always looks like he’s winking.

  ‘Hi, Winky!’ I replied. ‘How are things going?’

  ‘Everything is hamster-iffic with me,’ he squeaked.

  ‘Same with me,’ I said.

  Winky is the only one I know who can understand my squeaks, because he’s a hamster, too.

  ‘Glad you could visit, Humph,’ Winky said. ‘Wait until you see my wheels.’

  I looked closely at Winky.

  He had four paws, just like me, but I didn’t see any wheels.

  ‘What wheels?’ I asked.

  ‘My car,’ he said. ‘The Paynes got me my very own car.’

  I had a lovely, big cage, a wheel for spinning, a mirror, a little bell, and a hamster ball.

  But I didn’t have a car.

  ‘Look at them. They’re talking,’ Mandy squealed.

  Tammy, Pammy and Bwian – I mean Brian – all giggled.

  ‘What are they talking about?’ Mandy said. ‘Oh, I know! Humphrey wants to see Winky’s car!’

  Before I knew what was happening, Mandy took Winky out of his cage and put him into a hamster-sized car.

  It was bright blue and it had four wheels.

  In the middle was a bigger wheel, like the wheel I spin on.

  This was one really wheely car!

  ‘It’s unsqueakably wonderful!’ I said.

  ‘Watch this!’ Mandy put Winky in the big wheel and he started spinning.

  As the wheel spun, the car began to roll.

  Mandy took me out of my cage and held me in her hand so I could watch.

  ‘Go, Winky!’ I squeaked.

  ‘Go, Winky, go!’ Pammy
, Tammy and Brian shouted.

  Winky made the wheel go faster and faster.

  Zoom! The car glided across the room.

  Mandy picked the car up and turned it around.

  Zoom! The car glided across the room in the other direction.

  ‘Go, Winky, go!’ Mandy shouted.

  I think I have a wonderful life as the classroom pet in Room 26.

  I think it’s the best life a hamster ever had.

  But I have to admit, I was a TINY-TINY-TINY bit jealous of Winky.

  I wanted a really wheely car, too!

  After a while, Mandy stopped the car and took Winky out.

  ‘I don’t want you to get tired,’ she said as she put him back in the cage.

  ‘Thanks, Mandy!’ he squeaked.

  Of course, I was the only one who could understand him.

  ‘Do you mind sharing?’ she asked Winky.

  Winky squeaked. ‘Not at all.’

  Before I knew what was happening, Mandy put me in the car.

  The car felt a lot like my nice yellow hamster ball.

  But this was no everyday hamster ball. This was a really wheely car!

  I started spinning on the wheel.

  Zoom! The car lurched forward.

  Zoom! I spun faster and the car rolled across the room.

  I spun faster and faster. Zoom! Zoom!

  ‘Go, Humphrey, go!’ Mandy shouted.

  ‘Go, go, go,’ Pammy, Tammy and Brian shouted.

  I was going a little too fast, and the car slammed into the wall.

  Zoom! The car spun around and rolled in the other direction.

  ‘Isn’t it fun?’ Winky squeaked.

  ‘It’s the most fun I’ve ever had,’ I shouted.

  ZOOM-ZOOM-ZOOM!

  I could have spun that wheel forever.

  For the rest of the weekend, Winky and I took turns racing the bright blue car.

  Sometimes Mandy put me in my hamster ball, so Winky and I could roll along next to each other.

  It was fun, but my hamster ball doesn’t have wheels.

  ‘If you had a car, we could have a real race,’ Winky said.

  ‘I hope I’ll have a really wheely car of my own some day,’ I told

  Winky on Sunday night.

  ‘I hope so, too, Humphrey,’ Winky said with a wink. ‘I really do.’

  ‘Og, there was a car and it was blue and I went ZOOM-ZOOM-ZOOM …’ I squeaked to my neighbour when I got back to Room 26 on Monday.

  ‘BOING-BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og jumped up and down in his tank.

  ‘I’ll tell you the rest later,’ I said.

  The bell rang and class began.

  Before our maths lesson, Mrs Brisbane asked Mandy to tell the class about our weekend.

  ‘It was great,’ Mandy said. ‘I think Humphrey and Winky were happy to see each other. At least they squeaked a lot.’

  My friends giggled. Stop-Giggling-Gail laughed the loudest.

  ‘And Humphrey really loved rolling around in Winky’s hamster car,’ Mandy explained.

  ‘Car?’ A.J. said in his loud voice. ‘He has a car?’

  Mandy nodded. ‘Yes. It’s like a hamster wheel, but it looks like a car. Humphrey loved it as much as Winky does.’

  ‘I’ve never seen a hamster car,’ Pay-Attention-Art said.

  ‘Me neither,’ Heidi added.

  ‘Well … I brought it with me,’ Mandy said. ‘Is it all right to show them, Mrs Brisbane?’

  Mrs Brisbane smiled. ‘Of course, Mandy. I’d like to see it, too.’

  Mandy reached in her rucksack and there it was. The little blue car!

  ‘Oooh,’ my classmates said.

  ‘Ahhh,’ Mrs Brisbane said. ‘Why don’t you show us how it works?’

  Mandy gently took me out of my cage and put me in the racing car.

  She set the car on the floor and I began to spin the wheel.

  ‘Go, Humphrey, go!’ Richie shouted as I rolled the car between the students’ tables.

  I spun the wheel a little faster.

  ‘Faster, Humphrey, faster!’ I heard A.J. shout.

  ‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og yelled as he splashed in the water side of his tank.

  My friends all stood up to watch me, so I spun even faster.

  I had a difficult time rounding the corner near Wait-for-the-Bell-Garth’s foot, but I managed to keep going.

  ‘I hope he doesn’t lose control,’ Mrs Brisbane said.

  It wasn’t easy, but I kept the car going without rolling into something.

  ‘Humphrey! Humphrey!

  Humphrey!’ my classmates chanted.

  All their cheering made me spin even faster.

  I spun so hard, I felt DIZZY-DIZZY-DIZZY.

  Before I knew it, my car rolled up against the leg of Mrs Brisbane’s desk.

  The car bounced off the leg and spun even faster until it suddenly stopped … like THAT!

  Mrs Brisbane had stopped the car with her foot.

  ‘Humphrey, I think you need a rest,’ she said.

  I had to admit she was right.

  ‘I can see that Humphrey had a great time at your house,’ Mrs Brisbane told Mandy, as she put me in my cage.

  ‘Yes,’ Mandy replied. ‘I put Humphrey in his hamster ball and Winky in the car and they raced each other,’ she said. ‘But I think Humphrey would like his own car. Then they could have a real race.’

  ‘A hamster race!’ Garth said. ‘I’d like to see that!’

  ‘Humphrey should have his own car,’ Golden-Miranda said.

  ‘That’s right!’ A.J. said in his LOUD-LOUD-LOUD voice. ‘They could race, and I know Humphrey-Dumpty would win!’

  I like the funny nickname A.J. made up for me.

  ‘Thanks!’ I squeaked.

  ‘BOING-BOING!’ Og said.

  When I looked around, all my classmates were smiling.

  ‘Winky might win. He knows how to make his car go really fast,’ Mandy said. ‘But the car costs a lot of money. The only way I got Winky’s car was by asking for it for my birthday.’

  Money! Sometimes I forget about human things, like money.

  My friends weren’t smiling any more.

  ‘We’ll find a way. Let me think about it,’ Mrs Brisbane said. ‘Now, it’s time to start our maths.’

  It wasn’t easy for me to think about maths after all that excitement.

  When Mrs Brisbane wrote an ‘8’ on the board, it looked like a race track with fun twists and turns.

  Later, while my friends studied science, Mrs Brisbane put me in the car and let me roll around Room 26.

  It was fun, but not as much fun as being in my own car and racing Winky would be.

  Even worse, at the end of the day, Mrs Brisbane gave the car back to Mandy.

  ‘I’m sure Winky will want this,’ she said.

  ‘Yes,’ Mandy said. ‘But I hope Humphrey gets a car, too.’

  ‘YES-YES-YES!’ I squeaked.

  ‘BOING-BOING-BOING!’ Og took a big leap into the water side of his tank.

  Mandy giggled. ‘I forgot about Og. I wonder if they have frog cars.’

  ‘Now that would be funny!’ Mrs Brisbane said with a smile.

  *

  That evening, when Og and I were alone, I opened the lock-that-doesn’t-lock on my cage and walked over to Og’s tank.

  ‘Do you want to be in a race?’ I asked.

  ‘BOING.’ Og didn’t sound very sure.

  ‘Well, I do,’ I said. ‘And if there’s a car for hamsters, there should be a car for frogs, too.’

  ‘BOING-BOING!’ Og seemed more interested.

  I tried to picture Og driving a car.

  With his big webbed feet, I didn’t see how he could spin the wheel to make it go.

  ‘Don’t be upset,’ I told him. ‘I don’t have a car, either.’

  Og and I were quiet for the rest of the evening.

  At least I could imagine having a really wheely car, even if it wasn’t the same at all.
/>
  The next morning, Mrs Brisbane entered Room 26 with a big smile on her face and a large box in her hand. She said, ‘Last night, I went to Pet-O-Rama.’

  Pet-O-Rama? That’s the pet shop where I used to live!

  ‘I told the manager we want to have a hamster car race,’ Mrs Brisbane explained. ‘And he wants to help us.’

  The manager – my old friend Carl – wanted to help?

  ‘YIPPEE-YIPPEE-YIPPEE!’ I squeaked.

  My friends looked as happy as I was.

  The door opened and Mr Morales, the head of Longfellow School, walked in.

  ‘Good morning, class,’ he said.

  He turned to Mrs Brisbane. ‘What did you want to show me?’

  ‘This,’ our teacher said.

  She picked up the box and opened the lid.

  Then she reached in and took out a car.

  It wasn’t a real car.

  It was a really wheely hamster car!

  And it was bright red with flames painted on the side!

  ‘Eeek!’ I squeaked. ‘It’s just what I wanted.’

  Mrs Brisbane told Mr Morales about Winky’s car and the idea about a hamster race.

  ‘Pet-O-Rama is giving this car to Humphrey,’ she said.

  I was so surprised, my whiskers wiggled and my tail twitched.

  ‘It has the pet shop name on the back,’ she said.

  I scrambled to the tippy-top of my cage to get a better look.

  It was true. ‘Pet-O-Rama’ was written on the back of the red racing car.