Breathe Again: A Love Story

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Breathe Again: A Love Story Page 19

by Joelle Duff


  “I saw you last night,” she said, her voice loud. “I don’t like you. I don’t think you’re good enough for Jackson. He’s supposed to be with Sophia, not you.”

  I was horrified, and I was almost too afraid to look in Jackson’s direction. If there was anyone that could come up with a retort to that, it would be Jackson, but even he was speechless. This girl was half my age, but she made me want to run in the opposite direction; hide in the bathroom or, preferably, the solitude of my own apartment.

  I was removed from all those terrible things I’d read earlier. Sure, they called me some nasty names, but the people who’d written those things were hiding behind the safety of their computer screen, as if they didn’t know that their comments were about a real person. I didn’t even read it all on a computer screen; I read the things that one person printed out for me to see.

  This, on the other hand, was much more painful. This was someone who was telling me, to my face, that I wasn’t good enough for Jackson. She said it with such conviction too, like she believed every word she said.

  “Naw, I don’t think that’s true.”

  It wasn’t Jackson that said it; he was too busy still trying to figure out exactly what to say. It was Jude, who was now standing behind us, looking that little girl in the eye.

  “Mellie’s cool. She’s pretty too, don’t you think?” The girl just shrugged, surprisingly unfazed by Jude’s presence. Most other girls her age would have been a whimpering mess at his feet, but this girl only had eyes for Jackson, apparently. “And she has great taste in friends,” he said, turning back to Lucy and winking at her.

  The girl huffed, obviously annoyed that her own personal fangirl moment with Jackson was over, and turned to go back to her own table. I shook my head, and made my way back to my seat, Jackson following me.

  “Sorry about that,” he mumbled when we sat back down.

  “It’s fine. Nothing I haven’t heard already today,” I said, shrugging.

  All three of them looked at me; Lucy was horrified, Jude just looked amused, and Jackson was most definitely upset. “What do you mean it’s nothing you haven’t heard already today? Did you look yourself up or something? I’m pretty sure I told you quite a few times that you probably shouldn’t do that,” Jackson said, turning toward me.

  I realized my slipup, but didn’t really want to rat Teresa out. “Oh, it’s nothing. Don’t worry about it.”

  Of course Jackson wouldn’t let it go. “It isn’t nothing. You don’t have a computer Mellie, and I don’t remember you using mine today, so where did you hear those things? Lucy didn’t say anything, did she?” He gave Lucy a pointed look across the table, but she just looked affronted.

  “Don’t be an ass Jackson,” she said. “Of course I didn’t say anything to her. I don’t even read the news anymore; it isn’t worth it. I know it, and you know, and Mellie should know it too.”

  I sighed. “It was Teresa, alright? She brought over this stack of articles that she’d printed, and apparently I just wanted to torture myself while you two were talking,” I said to Jackson. The look that came over his face was pure disgust once he realized what I was saying.

  “Teresa is the one who showed you what people are saying about you?” he asked me, though he already knew the answer.

  I nodded, and grabbed a piece of the bread in the basket at the center of the table.

  “What a bitch,” Lucy quipped, causing Jude to smirk. Jackson just looked over at her, not amused.

  “I figured she just wanted me to be aware,” I said quietly, suddenly annoyed that the conversation was focused purely on me and my inability to take what these people said. Lucy, Jude, and Jackson were talked and speculated about on a daily, if not hourly, basis, and I was only slightly mortified that they were so concerned about me being upset about it all. Not only that, but I was even more embarrassed that I did actually let it all get to me.

  “No,” Lucy said, her annoyed gaze focused directly on Jackson, “she didn’t. She did it because she wanted to shake you up.”

  “Lucy,” Jackson warned, and I moved my eyes between the two. They were staring each other down, neither willing to give up any time soon, it seemed.

  “Did Teresa also tell you about Saturday?” She asked, and I looked at Jackson, confused.

  “What about Saturday?”

  I could hear Jude chuckle, as if he knew exactly what was about to go down. He knew to stay out of it, thank goodness, and just took another sip from his beer. Apparently our little spat was much more interesting than the television though, since his focus was completely on us and not the football game anymore.

  Lucy looked at Jackson pointedly, which caused me to stare him down too. He was keeping something from me, which was most definitely not okay. Jackson rubbed his face with his hand, and leaned back in his chair, looking up at the ceiling.

  “I really didn’t want to get into this here Lucy,” he said, his voice low.

  “Well, she deserves to know, and you’re being an ass if you keep it from her.” God, sometimes I loved Lucy, and sometimes I didn’t know what the hell I was supposed to feel about her. Jackson still didn’t say anything, just kept his gaze on the ceiling. Lucy, realizing that he wasn’t going to tell me himself, turned to me instead. “We found out who tipped off the paparazzi on Saturday, about the restaurant we were at.”

  I wasn’t sure what to say, and I definitely wasn’t sure that I actually wanted to know.

  “Lucy, I’ll talk to her about it later,” Jackson finally spoke up, but Lucy wasn’t about to be stopped; not now that she actually got started.

  She ignored him completely, her eyes still on me. “It was Sophia. Well, Sophia and Heather, Jackson’s number two. They’re the ones who tipped off the photogs.”

  I looked at Jackson, absolutely horrified. “Jackson, please tell me you didn’t have anything to do with this,” I said quietly, hoping desperately that Lucy was lying. I didn’t doubt that Sophia would do something like that, but I’d only met Heather a handful of times? Why on earth would she feel the need to leak our location, when they both knew that I was out with Jackson?

  Jackson sighed. “Of course I didn’t have anything to do with it. Sophia and Heather worked it out, together, hoping to get some attention to us on Saturday. I’ve already talked to Heather about it and warned her that she’d be fired if she pulled some stunt like that again.”

  “Okay, but I still don’t understand why they would do it. What would they have to gain from it?”

  Jackson didn’t say anything at first, so obviously Lucy felt the need to explain it for me, which Jackson was most definitely not happy about. “They did it so Jackson would be seen with Sophia again. They knew you wouldn’t want to leave with Jackson, not when they knew you were already hesitant about making your relationship public. Sophia has been eyeing Jackson for years, and Heather has some sort of girl crush on Sophia. She works for Jackson, but will pretty much do anything that Sophia asks of her. It’s really annoying, actually.”

  “Lucy,” Jackson growled in her direction, but Lucy just stuck her tongue out at him. “Stop, right now. We don’t need to talk about this right now.”

  “Oh really?” Lucy challenged him. “And when were you going to tell her? She deserves to know that you’re working with a cold-hearted bitch that’s trying to get her claws in you. She’s been trying for years, we both know that.”

  I couldn’t breathe. Lucy couldn’t be right, could she? I turned to Jackson, wanting to ask the question but not entirely sure that I wanted to know the answer. Jackson’s face was stone, looking at Lucy with daggers.

  “She deserves to know Jackson, you know that,” Lucy said, her voice harsh.

  “Shut. Up.” Jackson said. I’d never heard his voice so menacing, and it frightened me. Lucy was always so sweet; why did this seem to bring up so many hard feelings? I mean, obviously I knew why it bothered me, but I had no idea why Lucy was so concerned.

  “Hey man,” Jude
said, breaking his silence. “Don’t talk to her like that.” His voice was still casual, laid back, but there was definitely a warning there.

  “You stay out of this. This is none of your business,” Jackson said, turning in Jude’s direction.

  “It is my business when you start talking to my girl like that,” Jude said, eyeing Jackson with a raised eyebrow.

  “Your girl?” Jackson snorted. “You shouldn’t be with Lucy, you know that.”

  “Jackson, that isn’t fair,” I said softly at the same time that Lucy started protesting too.

  “It’s true,” Jackson said, raising his voice up an octave. “We’ve been telling Lucy that he isn’t good for her, and she just won’t listen. She deserves someone better than that.” I cringed, and I saw Lucy bolt up from her chair. I wanted to go comfort her, but I was almost afraid to leave Jackson alone with Jude. A few of the other guests were starting to look in our direction, but Claude and Peter were still blocking most of their views.

  “And you’re so great for Mellie?” Jude challenged, looking at Jackson pointedly. “You aren’t exactly the poster boy for morality dude.”

  “I am good for her. You, on the other hand, seem to have a new girl in your bed every week, and they always seem to get it on camera. Is Lucy just this week’s conquest? Because I won’t let that happen to her.”

  For the first time since I met him, the casual look left Jude’s eye. Something Jackson said had actually hit him, and for a moment I felt sorry.

  “I care about her Jackson. I know you don’t believe me, but I do. And even though it’s none of your business, we haven’t even slept together. Lucy has some issues, we all know that. I don’t know if I’m supposed to be there as her boyfriend, but I want to be there as her friend. She needs it.”

  I definitely agreed with him on that, and judging by the hardening of Jackson’s jaw, I knew he did too.

  “And dude, don’t be such a hypocrite. I know you just got that part. The crazy fans, Sophia’s fucking scheme to get you in bed with her, those aren’t going anywhere. If anything, they’re just going to get worse. I know you care about Mellie, but you know as well as I do that you can’t judge anyone by what you hear about them in the media. That’s just not fair.”

  Jackson let out a loud breath, but said nothing. I turned to Jude, and offered him a small smile. I understood what he was saying, and I agreed. It didn’t mean that it didn’t terrify me completely, but if I’d learned anything about people, especially people in this world, it was that you couldn’t judge them by the words of others.

  Jude smiled back at me, and I knew right then that I did like him. He was a good guy, regardless of whatever the tabloids wanted to say about him. And if I thought that about him, then it really shouldn’t matter what they said about me either.

  He got up from the table. “I’m going to go find Lucy,” he said, turning to where the bathrooms were.

  Jackson still had his head back, but I reached in his lap to grab one of his hands. I leaned over to put my head on his shoulder, and we sat in silence for a few moments.

  “I was being an ass, wasn’t I? Jackson asked quietly.

  “I think you were just being protective of Lucy. And me.”

  He nodded, and turned to look at me. “I was going to tell you about Sophia, I promise. I was just so happy about the part that I wanted to celebrate with you before it all went to shit.”

  “I understand, I really do. I can’t say that it doesn’t upset me, but I trust you. I know you won’t do anything with her.”

  Jackson sighed, and turned to look at me. “I love you Mellie, you know that.”

  “I do.”

  We stayed silent for a few more seconds, when Lucy and Jude came back to the table. Her eyes were red from crying, but there were no more tears. Jude had his hand on the small of her back, and I was thankful that she had someone that really did seem to care about her.

  The waitress came back with our salads, and Lucy ordered another margarita. It was her third, and I was still on my first glass of wine. I would have said something, if she weren’t in such a delicate state already.

  “So,” Jude said, looking at me this time. “I know you said you read whatever that bitch lady gave you, but did you happen to look yourself up at all?”

  I glanced at Jackson nervously, but he was actually smiling at me this time. “No,” I said slowly, not really sure where he was going with it.

  “Seriously Mellie?” Lucy said, wiping her nose on the sleeve of her sweater. “So you have no idea what people are really saying about you then?” I just shook my head slowly, unsure of what they were getting at. Lucy and Jude laughed, and I swear I even heard Jackson chuckle from his seat next to me.

  “Hold on, let me pull a few of them up so I can read them to you verbatim,” Lucy said, pulling out her phone from her purse. I glanced over to Jackson, a confused look on my face, but he just smiled at me and shrugged. “Oh! Here we go. Jackson Traver brought his beautiful new girlfriend, baker Melanie Devlin, or Mellie Rose as he (adorably) referred to her last night, to the Stand Alone premiere in Hollywood on Tuesday night. We don’t know much about this new leading lady in Jackson’s life, but we can say with absolute certainty that this girl has some serious style. We have a feeling she’ll be around for a while, especially since Jackson isn’t known to be seen with just anyone.”

  I’m pretty sure my mouth was wide open, trying to comprehend what Lucy was saying. She barely paused before moving onto the next one. “Last night may have been the first night that we’ve all seen Mellie Rose, but I’m pretty sure we can all say that we like her with Jackson much more than Sophia. She seems good for him, if not a little too good.”

  Lucy grinned at me, at put her phone back down on the table.

  “Wait,” I said, holding up my hand. “So some people actually liked me?”

  Jude burst out laughing, while Jackson pulled me close to him so he could place a kiss on my hair.

  “You could say that Mellie,” he whispered.

  “There’s pretty much more of the same,” Lucy said. “You’ve pretty much been deemed the best dressed person on the red carpet in the past month. People love that you’re like them; not jaded, relatable.”

  I frowned. “But I’m not a star,” I said.

  They all smiled at me. “Just you wait.”

  Chapter 27

  We went to Jackson’s dad’s house for Thanksgiving the next week. If it were possible, I was almost more nervous to meet his father and brothers than I was at the premiere. Jackson tried to reassure me that they already loved me; they knew I had to be special if he was actually bringing me home to them.

  It was the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, and I was finishing up the pumpkin pies I was baking for dinner the next day, when one of the newer cashiers, Lindsey, came back into the kitchen to let me know that someone was there to see me.

  “Who is it?” I asked, wincing as my elbow hit the oven doors that I was pulling the pies out from.

  “I dunno,” she said, shrugging. Lindsey was usually a sweet girl, but we were all ready to get out of there. Josephine was closing up shop before lunch so we could all prep for our respective Thanksgivings.

  “Okay,” I huffed, trying to blow a piece of hair away from my eyes. “Let them know I’ll be out in a second.”

  She left through the swinging door, and I finished pulling out the rest of my pies. I’d baked a lot more than I needed, and figured I’d just send the rest of the staff home each with one, and maybe even some of the customers that were left when we closed. I put them on the cooling racks before untying my apron so I could go out to the front to see who was waiting for me.

  I said as I pushed through the door to the café. She glanced over her shoulder, and just motioned to a man sitting at one of the bistro tables in the corner. I recognized him instantly; it was Collin, who I hadn’t seen since I left him on our last date. I don’t even think he’d been into the café since then, which is probably why
Lindsey didn’t recognize him.

  I frowned, but made my way over to where he was sitting in front of the window. As soon as he saw me, he stood up.

  “Mellie,” he said, his voice shaking. “I wanted to stop by, wish you a happy Thanksgiving. And give you these.” He thrust his hand in front of him, which held a bouquet of pretty daisies.

  I was taken aback, not entirely sure how I was supposed to respond to the gesture. It wasn’t the first time someone had come into the café in the past week, hoping to get a glimpse of Jackson, or to even meet me, but this was Collin. He had been so practical, level headed when we dated, just like me.

  “Oh,” I said, eyeing the flowers warily, “they’re beautiful.” I didn’t immediately reach out for them, so he took a step forward so he could make sure I took them.

  He looked so eager to give them to me, so I took them from his hands. I noticed a thin sheen of sweat across his forehead, which he wiped away with the back of his hand after I took the flowers from him. Something made me feel uneasy about the whole interaction, but I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. Anything that had happened between us had been all but forgotten.

  “Thank you Collin,” I said politely, and took a step back so we weren’t in each others’ personal space anymore. “I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving with your family.” I remembered he had a sister that he usually spent the holidays with. There was actually one point where I fleetingly wondered if I would spend the holidays with them too.

  “You too,” he said, though he didn’t make a move to leave. I passed him another quick smile before turning to head back into the kitchen.

 

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