Breathe Again: A Love Story

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Breathe Again: A Love Story Page 20

by Joelle Duff

As soon as the door swung behind me, I took a relieved breath of air. Darcy was standing at my counter, digging into one of the pies with a spoon, and I shot her an annoyed glance.

  “What are you doing Darcy?” I said, putting the daisies onto the other end of the counter.

  “I figured you made extra, since there’s like, a thousand pies here,” she said, blowing on a piece before sticking the fork in her mouth.

  “Yeah, well, that one is yours now. Tell your family happy Thanksgiving,” I said, motioning to the pie with a few bites missing. Darcy just shrugged, and shoved her fork in again.

  “Who were you talking to out there?” She asked, turning to look at me.

  I sighed, and started cleaning up my mess. “It was Collin. I haven’t seen him since, you know…I guess he just wanted to wish me a happy Thanksgiving, and give me those,” I said, motioning to the daisies on the counter.

  Darcy looked over at where I was pointing, and raised her eyebrow. “Flowers? Huh.”

  I just shrugged, and turned back to where I was washing the bowls and spoons I used to make the pies. “Okay, well I’ll see you next week lady,” Darcy said, crossing the kitchen to give me a half hug while I still had my hands in the sink.

  “You too,” I said over my shoulder. Darcy smiled, and turned to head back out the swinging doors.

  “Wait,” I called out, “Darcy?”

  “Yeah?” she said, pausing in the doorway.

  “Do you think you could ask the girls at the register if they can get someone’s name or to check with you before they come back here to get me? Lindsey didn’t know who Collin was, and it just caught me off guard. I don’t really want people thinking they can come here and interrupt my work whenever they want.”

  “Sure,” she said, smiling.

  I finished up washing the dishes, and went out to pass out the pies to the rest of the staff and guests that were left. Thankfully Collin had already left, and I went back into the kitchen. The daisies were still sitting on the kitchen counter. I didn’t really know what I was supposed to do with them, especially since I had a gorgeous bouquet of roses upstairs from Jackson. I hesitated for a second before tossing them in the trash, and then made my way up to my apartment to finish getting ready for the weekend.

  Jackson was right when he said that his family already liked me. I recognized Seth the second we got into his dad’s house, and he pulled me into a hug before he even greeted his brother.

  “Mellie,” Jackson said once Seth released me, “I want to introduce you to my other brothers, Nathan and Luke. Guys, this is Mellie.”

  Even if I’d never met Seth, I would have known that the four of them were related somehow. They were all tall, though Jackson was by far the tallest. They all had differing shades of the same brown hair, and identical blue eyes. I knew that Nathan was Jackson’s older brother, and Luke the youngest, with Seth in between he and Jackson.

  “It’s nice to meet you Mellie,” Nathan said, holding his hand out to me. Luke, on the other hand, just pulled me into a hug, much like Seth had earlier.

  A pretty girl, probably about the same age as Jackson and Nathan, cleared her throat in the doorway to the kitchen. I knew immediately that she was Stacy, Nathan’s fiancé. Jackson had talked about her before, how he hadn’t really understood her relationship with his brother until he met me.

  “Hi Mellie,” she said, pulling me in close for a hug. “It’s wonderful that we finally get to meet you. Jackson has told us so much about you.” She let me go, and smiled at me. She really was beautiful, with mocha colored skin and hazel eyes. I could tell that she wasn’t wearing much makeup, but that took absolutely nothing away from her beauty. It really wasn’t fair that some girls were just naturally gorgeous like that.

  “Thank you all so much,” I said, turning around to everyone in the living room. “I really appreciate you letting me spend the holiday with all of you.”

  “And we’re happy to have you.” A voice I didn’t recognize rang out from behind me. I turned, startled, and knew that it belonged to Jackson’s father, Hank Traver. He didn’t move from the doorway, but his smile made me feel comfortable immediately. “Now, let’s go eat.”

  The boys hooped and hollered, and Stacy grabbed my elbow to lead me into the dining room. Jackson put the pies I brought on the counter, and joined us all at the dining table.

  I was so used to cooking for Jackson and I, that I almost forgot how nice it was to actually be taken care of for once. Stacy and Hank piled everyone’s plates high with food, and there was so much laughter and love at that one table that I almost didn’t know I was supposed to fit in with it all. Holiday meals with my family back in Kansas were always slightly awkward, with conversations usually focused around my father’s holiday sermons or my sister’s children. Knowing that my family was still back in Kansas, acting like they were supposed to in front of each other, instead of letting loose and actually being themselves, almost made me tear up. Not because I missed it, but because of what I knew they were missing out on.

  “So, Mellie,” Hank asked in the middle of dinner, “what’s your family up to today? Not that we don’t love having you here, of course, because we do, but I’m surprised that you wouldn’t want to go home for Thanksgiving.”

  I glanced nervously at Jackson, but he smiled at me, and just reached under the table to squeeze my hand before shoveling another bite of mashed potatoes into his mouth.

  I set my fork down on my plate, and wiped my mouth with my napkin. “Um, I guess I just wanted to spend Thanksgiving with Jackson,” I said.

  Hank nodded, and studied for me a second. I felt myself redden under his gaze. “I can understand that. I remember what it was like to be so in love with someone that you don’t want to leave their side, even for a day,” he said, and smiled at me.

  Jackson still had his hand in mine, and squeezed again. We finished dinner talking about Jackson’s new role, about Luke’s upcoming semester in college, and even about Hank’s wife and Jackson’s mother. They didn’t cry over her, just told stories and laughed at jokes from years ago. Even though I didn’t know what they were talking about at times, they made sure I knew I was still family. And it really felt like I was.

  Chapter 28

  Jackson had to leave early the next morning to do a promotional tour for Stand Alone on the East Coast. He was going to be gone for three weeks, and I knew I was going to be miserable.

  It was Tuesday morning, a few days after Thanksgiving, when Darcy came back into the kitchen again. I was teaching Chloe, the assistant that Josephine had hired for me, how to make macarons. She had gotten the hang of it, but just barely. I was starting to convince myself that I would never actually leave the café long enough for Chloe to take over; I shuddered just thinking at how she might butcher my recipes.

  “There’s someone here to see you,” Darcy called from the door.

  “Did you ask who it was?” I said without looking at her. I was too busy watching Chloe to make sure she whipped the egg whites to the right consistency; it was her third attempt, and I was getting tired of her overdoing it.

  “Believe me, you know who they are,” she said, and left before I could ask her to clarify.

  “Fine,” I huffed under my breath. I looked at Chloe, who was watching me with wide eyes. She was a shy girl, almost too scared of the world to have much personality, but she was sweet. She also hated it when she screwed up, which meant that I felt like an ass every time I got annoyed at her. “I’m going to head out there, just start making the filling like we did last week.” She nodded, and I untied my apron.

  I recognized Lucy’s squeal as soon as I entered the café. She didn’t care that behind the counter was employees only; she ran right past Darcy to throw her arms around me.

  “Hey Lucy,” I said, though it was hard to get it out with her arms squeezed so tightly around me.

  “Mellie, I missed you!” she said, pulling away from me. “We would have come earlier, since Jackson isn’t aro
und these days and I know you’re probably lonely, but Jude took me down to Mexico for Thanksgiving and we just got home yesterday.” I looked past Lucy to where Jude was still standing behind the counter. He gave me a half wave, and grinned.

  I grabbed Lucy’s hand and took her back in front of the counter. “Well, I’ve missed you too, but I have to say that I’m not all that lonely without Jackson.”

  Lucy gave me a look, and I laughed. “Okay, I do miss him, of course, but it’s kind of nice having a bit of time to myself these days.”

  “Well,” Lucy said, her eyes big and bright, “that doesn’t mean you need to be stuck at work all day long. I wanted to come by to see if you wanted to get together tomorrow night. I don’t have to be back to film until Friday, and I think we should go dancing or something. And since your boy is out of town, I’ll leave my boy at home too.” I saw her slide Jude a mischievous smile, which just made him smirk his signature smirk.

  “Um,” I said, racking my brain to try and come up with an excuse.

  “Don’t um me Mellie Rose Devlin. I know you don’t have anything better to do, so I’m just going to tell you right now that I’ll be picking you up at eight o’clock tomorrow night. You better be dressed to go out.”

  I sighed. “Alright Lucy, fine.” I knew it was useless arguing with her. Lucy was just one of those people who always got her way.

  “Perfect!” she said, clapping her hands. “Now, Jude has never had one of your exquisite creations, so…we’ll take one of everything,” she said, pointing to the display case that had at least a dozen different types of cookies and muffins.

  “One of everything?” I said, though I knew she probably meant it. When she just looked at me like I was the crazy one for clarifying, I laughed. “Alright then.”

  I had Darcy start getting their order together, and led them over to one of the empty tables in the back corner. It was then that I noticed Seth sitting at the center table, finishing off the remains of one of my muffins.

  “Seth!” I said, forcing us all to stop in front of him. “What are you doing here? And why didn’t you tell Darcy to come get me?”

  “Hey Mellie,” he said, getting up to give me a quick hug. “I didn’t know if you were working today, but obviously I had to come get one of your muffins. I have the day off, and my dad is driving me nuts at the house. I needed to get out.”

  I nodded, though I couldn’t quite envision Hank being anything but sweet and kind. “Well, enjoy whatever you’d like. And tell your dad thanks again for inviting me over on Thursday. He and Stacy are pretty fierce in the kitchen together.”

  Seth laughed. “Sure.”

  Jude cleared his throat behind me, and I realized that I was completely ignoring them. “Oh! I said, turning back to where Jude and Lucy were still standing behind me. “This is Seth, Jackson’s brother. Seth, this is Jude and…”

  “Lucy,” he finished for me. Obviously he knew who they were already, but the look on his face when he said her name made me wonder exactly what was going on there. I glanced behind me, and noticed that Lucy wasn’t even looking in Seth’s direction. Instead, she was focused on the dessert case back at the front of the store.

  “Well,” I said, turning back to Seth slowly, “it was great seeing you. Let me know if you have another day off and I’ll come out and join you for a muffin and coffee next time.”

  I would have invited Seth to join us, but I had a feeling that would have been a terrible idea. Apparently Seth knew that too, because he stood up to give me a quick hug, and sat right back down in his seat. The rest of us made our way back to one of the tables in the back of the café. Jackson and I always sat at it because it was slightly hidden from the rest of the café, and near the back doors so Jackson could get away easily if needed.

  We sat for a few minutes before Darcy brought over their array of pastries, along with three lattes. Jude and Lucy immediately dug into the bag of cookies and muffins, pulling everything out and spreading it all across the table. I couldn’t help but laugh at them as I drank my latte; it just seemed like something they would do. I realized that Darcy hadn’t included one of my maple donuts, which were my newest creation and current personal favorite.

  I excused myself so I could go grab one for them, and was almost to the front when I noticed Collin come in through the door. I froze, knowing that I was being silly for feeling uncomfortable in front of him. He was harmless, and his gesture the day before Thanksgiving had been a kind one. I was over what had happened between the two of us, just like I hoped he was. We were over; to be honest, we were never really on in the first place.

  He smiled as soon as he saw me, and raised his hand in a wave. I waved back, but just headed straight to the pastry case so that I could get one of the donuts. I prayed that our paths wouldn’t cross, but of course, there was no such luck.

  “Mellie,” he said, and I knew that he was right behind me. My back stiffened instinctively, but I tried to shake off the feeling. There were at least a dozen other patrons in the café; there was absolutely no reason for me to feel uncomfortable.

  “Hello Collin,” I said, and took another step back so that I could put a few feet in between us. He was staring at me, his smile so wide that I could see his perfectly white teeth.

  “I missed seeing you this weekend. I told Darcy that I was here to see you on Saturday, but she said you weren’t working.” I silently thanked Darcy, who was watching us from behind the counter, for telling him I wasn’t working. I had actually been in the café every day since Jackson left, getting my mind off the fact that he was actually gone.

  “Well, I do have a lot of work to do when I am here anyway,” I said, and I knew that my smile wasn’t convincing anyone. “And I should probably get back to it, or else I won’t be able to make any blueberry muffins for you tomorrow.” I turned to head back into the kitchen, forgetting almost completely about Jude and Lucy in the back of the café, but jumped when I felt a hand on my arm.

  Collin wasn’t gripping me tightly enough that I couldn’t get out of it if I wanted to, but I suddenly felt slightly ill. I didn’t really want to offend him, but he still made me feel severely uncomfortable.

  “Collin,” I said, hoping my voice wasn’t shaking. “Let me go.”

  He just crooked his head, like he didn’t understand what I was saying. I wasn’t sure if he honestly didn’t understand why I would ask him to stop touching me, or if he knew he was making me uncomfortable.

  “Is there a problem here?” I almost sighed in relief when I recognized Jude’s voice from behind me. Collin’s eyes widened, and he immediately moved his hand. I turned to look behind me, and saw both Jude and Seth standing there.

  “Not at all,” Collin said, and I could hear a slight amusement in his voice. He stared at me for a second, before turning around and heading right back out the door. He hadn’t even ordered anything.

  “What was that all about?” I heard Lucy ask from behind Jude and Seth, but neither moved to let her through. I suddenly felt myself overwhelmed with the interaction, and pushed through the both of them so that I could go back into the kitchen. I knew someone was following me, but I didn’t stop until I got to the top of the stairs and into the living room of my loft.

  I turned around, and saw both Lucy and Seth standing there, at least six feet apart. Whatever was going on between them, however, was apparently not as important as their concern for me. They both watched me carefully, and I struggled to steady myself. I had no idea why it had all just affected me the way that it did, but I knew for a fact that Collin made me feel strange. Scared.

  “I’m fine,” I said finally, after giving myself a few moments to regulate my breathing and my voice. “I’m just overreacting. It’s fine.”

  Neither looked like they actually believed me, but Lucy nodded. “Okay, if you’re sure.”

  “Mellie,” Seth said, ignoring Lucy completely. “Is there something you aren’t telling us? Obviously there was something off with that guy, an
d he made you freak out. Does Jackson know about it?”

  I shook my head. “There’s nothing for me to tell him. We dated a few times before I met Jackson, and I saw him for the first time since last week, when he brought some flowers the day before Thanksgiving. It was just a nice gesture, and I’ve completely read too much into it. I’m such an idiot.” I fell onto my couch, and put my head in my hands. I guess Jackson’s absence really was working me up.

  “You’re not an idiot,” he said quietly. “He obviously makes you feel uncomfortable. You should talk to Jackson, and Josephine.”

  I didn’t answer immediately, just kept my head in my hands. I really wanted to just be alone, so I agreed. “Alright,” I said finally, standing up.

  Seth studied me for a moment, then nodded. “Okay, let’s let her be, Lucy,” he said, putting his hand on Lucy’s back to lead her out of my apartment. I saw her stiffen for a moment, but relented and followed him out the door.

  I shut the door behind them, and went into my bedroom so I could lie down for a minute. My heart was still racing, for no reason whatsoever other than I was just completely freaked by Collin. I knew I shouldn’t be surprised that someone might be interested in getting to know me now; there were a few people that had recognized me since the night of Jackson’s premiere, but I didn’t draw too much attention. He just had this weird vibe about him now. I didn’t know if it was there when we dated and I just didn’t notice, or if he really was different. He had seemed like such a normal guy then.

  I hated that I wanted to stay out of the front of the café. I usually stayed in the kitchen, obviously, but it was nice to get out there sometimes to have a cup of coffee or something. He just made me want to stay in, and not even risk the chance that I would see him out there.

  Get it together Mellie, I mentally chastised myself. I was a grown ass woman; I could handle an awkward admirer, especially since he seemed relatively harmless otherwise.

  I sucked in a breath, and pulled myself off my bed before heading into the bathroom so I could check my makeup. I had too much to do downstairs, and I most definitely did not trust Chloe with my pastries just yet.

 

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