Slow and Steady 1

by J. H. Croix

  “You look badass holding it,” I replied with a wink, coming up behind her to help her raise her arms to the right level. Truth was she looked fucking sexy holding the gun in her hands.

  I had a serious problem when it came to this woman. Everything she did only amped up my need for her, spinning it tighter and tighter inside. At this rate, I was going to start having trouble letting her out of bed in the damn mornings. I had to get this under control.

  Later.

  For now, I was going to teach her how to shoot. And try to keep my mind off of how fucking sexy she looked.

  “Okay, so you want to hold it like this.” I adjusted her grip, showing her how to hold the weapon properly.

  She was timid about pulling the trigger at first, but she was a quick learner. Half an hour after we started, she was hitting the target with almost every try. I took the gun from her, making sure the safety was on when we decided to take a break.

  Niki spun around, throwing her arms around me in a big hug. “That was so much fun. I didn’t think I’d like it.”

  My arms wrapped around her, holding her close to me. “Glad you enjoyed it.”

  She released me and stepped back, wonder in her eyes as she looked up at me. I tried to hide my smile, but I couldn’t. Seeing her this happy and excited was too damn much for me.

  Chapter Twenty

  Niki

  A metallic smell lingered in the air at the range. Gunpowder, maybe. Do people even still use gunpowder?

  I knew next to nothing about guns, but if I was going to be shooting one, I wanted to find out how they worked. One of my quirks was my need to know how things operated if I was using them.

  “I’ve never shot a gun,” I told Sonny, watching him complete our forms when we got to the shooting range. Apparently, waivers were required before we could enter the range.

  “It’s fun,” he said, flashing me a half-grin before finishing up with our forms. “Read that, and sign at the bottom if you’re comfortable.”

  “Am I signing my soul over to the range?” I joked, reading what seemed to be a straightforward indemnity form.

  Sonny laughed, signing his waiver and pushing it across the counter at the older man who was helping us. “Nothing that dramatic.”

  “Well, in that case—” I signed with a flourish and placed my form on top of his. “Let’s go do this.”

  “I feel like I’ve heard that from you before.” Sonny winked, taking my hand and leading me through the front office and down a corridor.

  I laughed, winding my fingers through his. “It wasn’t like that.”

  “It wasn’t?” He paused outside a door, the smell more pungent back here.

  I met his gaze, pushing away the shyness threatening to surface. “Okay, maybe a little.”

  Sure, I hadn’t said those exact words last night, but the effect was the same. I’d finally shaken off my pesky virginity, a major shift for me.

  This would be another first for me, as with so many other things with him. Sonny was definitely getting me out of the monotony that was my life. I liked it. I was starting to like him.

  Sonny pushed through the door and led me into an enclosed space with papers on a line hanging at the end. Targets, I silently corrected myself.

  He quickly fitted my protection and picked up on the mounting nervousness I felt now that we were here. The smell, the sounds, it was all so unfamiliar. The space suddenly felt small. I wasn’t claustrophobic, but we were in a concrete hole with guns in it.

  My eyes darted around, taking in my new surroundings. I didn’t know if I liked being here yet. Sonny rested his hands on my shoulders and gave me a reassuring smile.

  I squared my shoulders. This was about my safety, my protection, and he was here with me. It would be fine. I glanced down at the gun in his hand, holding my palm out. “Are you going to give me the gun yet?”

  A part of me was hoping for a demonstration before my turn came. I probably could have asked him for one, but then he passed me the gun, and I knew I was going to have to wing it. Shoot from the hip, maybe literally. I’d find out soon enough.

  No such luck.

  The gun was heavier than I’d expected, but Sonny ran his hands along my arms and raised them. I suppressed a shiver at his touch, wondering if I couldn’t convince him to leave the range and touch me some more instead.

  He started explaining what I was supposed to do before I could suggest leaving, and I knew he wouldn’t leave before we did this anyway. I savored his protectiveness, which I found endearing instead of annoying because he was so genuine about wanting me to be safe.

  But it also meant I wasn’t getting out of this.

  To my great surprise, I wasn’t half bad at shooting. It wasn’t nearly as hard as I thought it would be. I started hitting targets, encouraged by Sonny’s excitement that I was getting it right.

  He was grinning from ear to ear by the time I was done, ready to call it a day. Exhilarated that I actually pulled it off and feeling empowered for having mastered a new skill, I threw my arms around him. “That was so much fun.”

  Sonny responded immediately. His arms wrapped around me, holding me fast against him. “Glad you enjoyed it.”

  When I stepped back, his wide smile sent heat spiraling through me. He curled his hand around mine, holstering the gun and pulling off the protection from both of our ears when we were outside the door again. “You ready to go?”

  “Sure. I think that was enough excitement for me for one day, but we could come back some other time, right?”

  “Absolutely.”

  We returned the equipment and walked back to Sonny’s truck. “Thank you for taking me to the range. Knowing I’m not completely helpless is already making me feel better.”

  He grinned, starting the drive back to his place. “I was hoping you would feel that way.”

  On the way home, I asked him a few questions about guns and shooting in general. Sonny took them seriously, answering each one and throwing in random facts between.

  The drive went fast, and before I knew it, we were back at his house. He leaned over and brushed a kiss to my cheek. “I’m going to go meet up with Zach. I shouldn’t be too long. If you need anything, just call.”

  “I’m sure I’ll be fine by myself for a few hours. Relax.” I had my book to get back to and three more where that one came from. Plus, I wanted to call Karen. We hadn’t talked in a few days, and I was dying to tell her about everything that had happened in the meantime. “Go to your friend, I’ll be fine.”

  “See you later,” he said, waving as I hopped out of the truck and let myself into his house. With my key.

  The thought that I had a spare key to his house now sent a little shiver through me. I realized staying with him was a temporary fix to an unfortunate situation I was in, but I was enjoying the idea of playing house with him. Well, it wasn’t an idea. It was happening.

  It was so far from my usual normal, it might as well have been on a different planet, but I loved it. I felt freer for it, more like I was getting some living done.

  Sonny waited until I was inside before driving off. I loved his protectiveness and appreciated that he didn’t smother me with it and clearly realized I was an independent woman.

  I walked through the empty house to the kitchen, already feeling more at home as I set my purse down, got my phone out and kicked off my shoes. Flicking on the kettle, I grabbed a cup to fix some tea and called Karen’s number.

  She answered on the second ring. “Niki? Finally! I was starting to wonder if you’d been kidnapped.”

  Karen had an active imagination. I didn’t doubt the thought really crossed her mind. “Nope, I’m safe. I’m at Sonny’s.”

  “Okay,” she said after hesitating for a beat. “Why?”

  “It’s a long story, but I’m staying here for the time being.”

  “What?” No hesitation this time as my bubbly friend squealed into the phone. “You’re staying with a guy? No way. Are you sure he di
dn’t kidnap you? Brainwash you maybe?”

  I laughed, cradling the phone between my ear and my shoulder as I added a tea bag to a mug. “He didn’t brainwash me either. He made compelling arguments, so I agreed.”

  “So you’re really there voluntarily?”

  “Totally of my own free will.”

  Karen’s incredulous laughter sounded over the phone before she said. “Well, I don’t blame you. I would’ve jumped at the chance to move in with a guy who looks like him.”

  “I didn’t say yes because he’s hot,” I protested. There was so much more to Sonny than a pretty face, and an insanely hot body.

  “But it didn’t hurt,” she teased. “I’m making tea. Have some with me and tell me all about the librarian staying with the cop. It sounds like the plot of a romance movie.”

  “I’m already making tea too,” I told her as the kettle boiled. Carrying my tea to the living room. I settled in on his couch, tucking my legs underneath me and angling my body so I could look out his window while we talked. “And my life is no movie.”

  “Really?” she asked, her voice doubtful. “The infamous boy in the small town, in trouble with the law, gets help from the local librarian and falls in love with her. Tell me that doesn’t sound like a movie.”

  “Except for the fact that he’s not in trouble with the law and no one’s in love,” I pointed out. “Don’t be ridiculous.”

  “Okay, okay,” she conceded, although I knew she wasn’t going to let it go. “Let’s leave love out of it before I offend your delicate sensibilities. At least tell me there’s been some steamy action. I mean, I know you said you’re just friends with him and helping out, but seriously. Just one little kiss? I’d even settle for some sexual tension.”

  “There’s been some,” I hedged, intentionally drawing out the moment.

  Karen squealed again, so loudly this time I had to pull the phone from my ear. “What? I knew it.”

  “No, you didn’t,” I teased, then spilled the beans. “But there was a lot more than one little kiss.”

  “Details, Niki. I need details. Pronto.”

  I sat back on the couch, pressing the phone closer to my ear as I told her about what happened last night. When I was done, she was quiet for a second. “I am so, so happy for you. You sound happy, too.”

  “I am. We’re still getting to know each other, but I like him.”

  She sighed. “I know you do, but you still need to be careful with him, Niki.”

  “I will be. I promise.”

  Karen’s concerns about Sonny, both with him personally and with the two us together were legitimate. I could recognize that, but I finally had a life to talk about, and I loved it. I didn’t want to let overthinking or being careful get in the way. Not yet.

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Sonny

  Zach’s house was a mess, but it usually was. His living room was strewn with takeout containers, a few beer bottles, and clutter. A blanket on the couch told me he’d been sleeping in front of his television and loud rock music blared from his patio outside.

  The man himself didn’t look to be in a much better state than his house though, and that was concerning. He was a good guy, but the pressure of being under investigation with Internal Affairs for as long as he had was building and stressing him out. I completely understood. God knew I would’ve been in a worse state than him if I’d had been dealing with that kind of pressure during the last few months.

  The trouble with guys like Zach and I was we really loved our jobs. Serve and protect, all that, we believed it. We loved it, and we lived it. Being told we weren’t trusted, or good enough, cut deep. It left scars that wouldn’t heal, and we’d never talk about.

  He walked ahead of me through his house, his dark hair sticking up in tufts. He wore nothing more than a faded pair of cutoff sweatpants. “Beer?”

  “Sure,” I said, following him to his kitchen. As we walked past the dining room, I noticed the gun collection he was busy cleaning at the table. Zach was a keen collector and had a near encyclopedic knowledge of them.

  Still, he only brought out the collection when he wasn’t doing well. It wasn’t because he was about to snap or anything. It was more about the methodical process of cleaning them. It kept his mind occupied and relaxed him. “Why did you haul all that stuff out again?” I asked, even though I knew the answer.

  “Maintenance is important,” Zach said as he pulled open his fridge and took out two beers, handing one over to me. “Besides, gives me something to do other than think about Wayne Maclin dragging me into my own goddamn station in cuffs.”

  As I thought. That must’ve been a damned nightmare for him, not that I expected him to want to chat much about it.

  “How are you doing with that?” I asked, following him out of his kitchen to his backyard. Like the rest of his house, the yard was unkempt and could use a mow. He really was letting things around here go to shit as caught up in the investigation as he was.

  He motioned to a plastic chair and kicked another one out from under a table for himself. “Not good. Fucker only took the cuffs off once we were in the interrogation room. Even had me standing there wearing them while he made himself coffee. Guess process and rights mean nothing to the asshole.”

  “Not when it comes to the two of us.” I took a swig of my beer. “He tell you anything about the outcome of the investigation yet?”

  Zach laughed bitterly, tossing his head back as he shook it. “Harris covered for me, but I’m sure you know about that. Maclin hasn’t said another word to me. I still have my job for now, but I can’t go out into the field and hell if I know how long that’s going to last.”

  “No news on being cleared for field work?”

  He shook his head again. “Nope. Loose cannon, remember? They declared me unfit, and that’s it. I’m assuming once Maclin’s done with this bullshit, I can request a reevaluation, but I don’t see that happening anytime soon.”

  “Asshole,” I muttered. I’d hoped what I came here to talk to him about would give Zach something to focus on other than his obvious feeling like his career was crumbling around him.

  I felt like crap for asking him about those files, but Maclin had been after him for a lot longer than I’d been looking into my father’s case. Which was exactly why I was hoping he would agree to help me.

  Zach tapped his beer bottle against mine. “Amen to that. He’s a world-class asshole. Too bad that doesn’t disqualify him from running his own investigations. I have a feeling we haven’t seen the last of him yet, not by a long shot.”

  “I think you’re right,” I told him, tipping my eyes to the sky as I wondered how to word what I was about to say. Eventually, I just let it rip. “I think Wayne’s involved in all this stuff with my dad. I think that’s why he came after you so hard about the files. He’s trying to cover his tracks, and he freaked when he saw they were gone.”

  “They were only gone for maybe an hour when he arrested me. He would’ve had to have applied for that warrant to search my truck before I even left with them. This isn’t your fault, Sonny. It’s Maclin’s.”

  “I know, but I don’t think you’re right about when he got the warrant. Everything we know about my dad’s case, the new stuff anyway, points to a lot going on behind the scenes. The more I look into it—and that hasn’t even been much—all signs point to some high-level players being involved. My gut doesn’t like it, not one damn bit.”

  “Right,” he agreed, cutting his eyes to mine. “What exactly are you saying?”

  “Only way he’d jump that fast for a warrant was if he were worried about something, not just because he was after you. Timing of the warrant aside, Maclin’s been gunning for you for a long time, but only now suddenly he arrests you for having a couple of files with you?”

  “You’re saying you think his overreaction wasn’t just because he’s a smug idiot who wanted to rub it in my face that he could arrest me if he wanted?”

  “It might’ve
been that, but I don’t think that’s all it was.”

  I explained my reasoning to him, told him all about Maclin and Yates giving me the same warnings and the way Maclin acted with me that day. “He’s involved, Zach. I’m sure of it.”

  “Even if he is, he’s a high ranking official within Internal Affairs who’s currently investigating both of us. Either of us says anything now about the possibility of corruption, all anyone is going to think is that we’re trying to derail his investigation.”

  “That’s why I’m not suggesting we go to anyone with this, not yet.”

  “What do you want to do then?” Zach asked. Our conversation had nudged him out of his lethargy. His gaze was more alert, his posture straightening. He might not have agreed with me at first, but he’d been swayed into the idea there might be something under the surface.

  I took it as a good sign. Maybe I didn’t sound crazy to everyone but myself all the time anymore. “We need to follow Maclin. He’s been following us, but I say we turn the tables on him. It shouldn’t be too hard to do if we can get Harris on board.”

  “That’s a big if, Lovett. Harris is the Chief, and Maclin is still IA. Harris protects us as much as he can. I’m thankful for that but realistically, is he going to authorize his men to informally investigate an agent in IA?”

  “I don’t know,” I admitted. Harris had done a lot for the both of us, but even he had to have his limits. Taking on the IA might be one of them. “But we won’t know unless we ask.”

  “That’s true. You’ll talk to him?”

  “I will. I’ll lay it all out for him. If he doesn’t agree, you and I can make our own plans. Until we know where Harris stands, let’s just stay off Maclin’s radar. We don’t need him tying our hands even more than he already has.”

  Zach chuckled, but his laughter didn’t reach his eyes. Dark and serious, they were already focused on the mission ahead. I could practically see the gears turning in Zach’s head as he thought over everything I told him. “I’m with you. A lot of what Maclin’s done makes sense if he’s corrupt himself. I’ve always had a feeling about him, but I wasn’t in the position to do much about it. This could be my shot to see if my gut is still trustworthy or not,” he commented.