Moored Heart (Catalina Dreams Book 1)

by I. M. Flippy

  “What happened?” Andy said urgently.

  Charlie had told Andy nearly everything except some details he kept to himself, like the tear he’d seen sliding down Jason’s cheek when they made love, which he assumed was due to overstimulation and not emotion... until he slipped and allowed himself to think about it.

  “He wants to take me on like a weekend,” Charlie said. “On his yacht! Out on the water!”

  “Oh damn, you guys gonna get married,” Andy said.

  Charlie was relying on Andy to be a voice of reason, but so far he was all over the place; wary of Jason’s intentions one second and rooting for them as a couple the next. Then again, Andy had always been so changeable.

  “Maybe I should say no,” Charlie said. “I don’t know what’s happening! This is supposed to be casual. But it doesn’t feel casual!”

  “What’s it feel like?” Andy said.

  Charlie sat on his unmade bed. He kept his room as neat as he was able most of the time, but it was usually in a baseline state of clutter and he nudged a pile of library books on the floor with his toe, wondering what Jason would think of his room. He’d tried to make it an adult’s room, though he’d lived in it since the age of ten when they’d moved into the house. Framed art prints hung carefully spaced on the walls and gauzy curtains in the windows and plenty of plants. He thought it was respectable, and not like the room of an average thirty-two-year-old who lived with his mother on an island.

  Jason would like it, he decided.

  “Feels like falling in love,” Charlie said.

  “Oh, boy.”

  “This is bad.” Charlie rubbed his eyes. “He didn’t even know he was into guys like a week ago. I can’t get so invested. He could wake up tomorrow and drop me, just…”

  “If he drops you, I will kick his ass,” Andy said.

  “You are seriously about half his size,” Charlie said.

  “And half his age. I will kick his ass into the ocean if he breaks your heart.”

  “Well, that’s probably a given.”

  “Don’t say that!”

  “Should I go on this yacht trip?” Charlie said.

  “Yes!”

  “You should talk me out of this.”

  “I can’t. I think you guys are cute and I want to go to parties on his yacht someday and meet all his hot cop friends who may also be questioning their heterosexuality. What are you going to wear!”

  “Ugh.”

  Charlie had a tendency to over-pack for trips so that two nights on Jason’s yacht meant a suitcase full of cardigans and four pairs of jeans (because each fit him well yet differently), four swimsuits, some scandalous underwear, and a couple of weird garments he’d bought on a dare at Andy’s urging. He doubted he’d wear the mesh crop top. It wasn’t exactly his scene. But he packed it anyway.

  He was standing on top of his too-small suitcase, bouncing up and down and ignoring the racing of his heart because Jason was picking him up at his house in less than an hour, when his mother appeared at the door. She held a diminishing joint in a roach clip between her fingers and squinted at him, her long braids hanging down.

  “Do you know if he wants kids?” his mother said.

  “Mom. That’s not... we’re not… That conversation isn’t even on the radar of anything!”

  He finally managed to zip up his suitcase. He’d packed his favorite hair product that he rarely used, and a variety of lubes and condoms. He spun around and stood in front of the mirror. He was wearing red trunks and a clingy black T-shirt that made his pecs look amazing.

  His mother was blocking the doorway, and he narrowed his eyes at her as he dragged his suitcase over and slipped on a pair of sneakers.

  “I’m not saying it’s necessarily that serious,” his mother said in a deceptively innocent tone. “I just thought it might have come up. You know, I wish you were a lesbian. Those girls meet and in two days they’re married and loading a U-Haul.”

  “Yeah, yeah.” He rolled his eyes and took the joint from her, inhaling deeply and holding it for a while as he handed the roach back. He exhaled, and his mother smirked at him. “It has not come up and I’m sorry I’m not a lesbian.”

  “Well, that’s not your fault,” she said, ever so blithely just as somebody pounded on the front door downstairs.

  “Oh my God, he’s here! Shit! He’s early!” Charlie shoved past her and ran halfway down the stairs before remembering his suitcase and running back up, the pounding on the door repeating. “Mom! Will you get it, please? Wait no, I don’t want my mother answering- Okay hold on…”

  “Charlie, darling sweetheart, you’ll have a coronary.” His mother moved smoothly past him, floating down the stairs in a fog of weed smoke, and Charlie’s heart jumped into his throat.

  “He’s a cop, you know,” he said weakly. But she was already opening the door.

  “It’s legal here, silly,” she said. But it seemed like she was speaking to Jason who Charlie saw as he finally rushed down the staircase again and stopped short behind his mother, pushing his hair back.

  “What’s legal?” Jason said, and suddenly noticing the joint said, “Oh. Yeah, no problem. Hello!”

  “Um, Jason, this is my mom,” Charlie mumbled. He hated how much he felt like a kid. “I don’t know if you met her at the shop…”

  “Lovely to meet you.” He smiled warmly and shook his mother’s non-weed hand as if he met his male lovers’ mothers all the time.

  “Oh my God, he really is so handsome.” His mother said in a rush. She held the roach out to Jason and said, “Would you like the last couple tokes, handsome? It’s very good. Elmina from my book club grows it in her hydroponic garage but she’s licensed and everything.”

  “I’m good, thank you so much.” Jason was trying not to laugh, but Charlie saw his eyes brimming as he bit down hard on his lip. He seemed to laugh to the point of crying so easily.

  Charlie imagined what it might be like to wake up in bed next to that man every morning, thinking of fresh ways to make him laugh until he cried.

  The yacht felt different to Charlie, in that he was getting used to it. He had a familiar feeling about the place now. It was small, for one. But after only a few visits, he now knew to stand back in the kitchenette when the bedroom door opened, or he would get a knock in the nose. He knew the circular booth in the stateroom was the comfiest place to eat once Jason had cleared it of clutter, but it was also nice to eat outside on the upper deck.

  He certainly knew the bedroom inside and out.

  “I cleared a drawer and some closet space for you if you want to use it,” Jason said. He was carrying Charlie’s giant suitcase, and he chuckled as he dropped it by the bed. “I don’t know if that was necessary, but it seemed polite. I’m not convinced you aren’t running away from home. You’re going to ditch me in the middle of the ocean and use this as a raft aren’t you. Although, I suppose it would make more sense to throw me over the side and take Morty for yourself.”

  “You got me.” Charlie stood in the doorway, bouncing on his toes. “That’s my plan exactly.”

  Jason left the suitcase by the bed and ambled over to Charlie wearing that shyly helpless expression he got sometimes. Charlie thought of it as Jason’s Bi-panic Face.

  “I’m glad you came,” Jason said. He stood near Charlie, his gaze raking up and down his body. “I like getting you alone on my boat.” He leaned in slowly and caught Charlie in a kiss, nudging his chin with his nose, nuzzling tenderly. Charlie sighed and kissed him back, his hands snaking up around his neck.

  What do I have to worry about? This is perfect.

  Jason held onto him tightly and they made out lazily for a bit until he backed up to the bed and pulled Charlie down on top of him.

  “Aren’t we…” Charlie whispered, feeling drunk on Jason’s kisses. “Aren’t we supposed to like... hmm... supposed to leave Catalina?”

  “Yeah, in a minute,” Jason said. He lay back and stared up at Charlie, gently pushing his ha
ir back. “I think you’re the best-looking man I’ve ever seen.”

  Charlie rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t stifle his own smile. Jason grasped his chin, turning his head so Charlie had to look at him. Jason looked so fond, so adoring. “That’s ridiculous,” Charlie said.

  “To me you are,” Jason insisted. He rubbed the pad of his thumb along Charlie’s bottom lip. “I like how your mouth is kinda wide and how you have that snarky smile, like a smirk. But then you have that genuine smile, and there’s a world of difference between them. And your mouth gets swollen and red when we kiss or when….”

  Charlie ducked his head and sucked a kiss to Jason’s throat, feeling him swallow. “Or when I suck your cock,” he suggested.

  “Or that…” He couldn’t stop touching Charlie, his hands sliding up under his shirt, massaging the muscles he found there. Charlie sighed and continued to mouth along Jason’s neck and smiled into his skin, feeling him get hard beneath him. “I want to blow you,” Jason said.

  Charlie leaned back and raised an eyebrow. “Are you sure?”

  Jason nodded, his eyes big. There was no mistaking the desire there. Charlie nodded once, and his heart raced as if he were the one venturing into unfamiliar territory.

  There was something different about this. Charlie couldn’t put his finger on it and later thought it was obvious.

  Jason’s breath puffed hotly against his skin and he rolled them over, tugging on Charlie’s cardigan and shirt and helping him get them off. His heart thudded some new melody in his chest as Jason pressed soft kisses there, taking his sweet time. There was no hesitation. Jason was sure of himself, worshipful even. He kept sitting back to stare at Charlie, who didn’t quite know what to do with his hands. He wanted to reach up and touch Jason, but Jason smirked and shook his head, taking his hands and pushing them back above Charlie’s head.

  “Stay like this,” he whispered.

  Charlie could only watch. He nodded dumbly, and let Jason have his way, his cock swiftly thickening at the very thought.

  “I’ve never... never done this,” Jason said, as if Charlie didn’t already know that.

  “Well, you’ve got a dick too.” Charlie gripped the pillow under his head, breathless with anticipation. “I’m sure you know what feels good.”

  “If I ever get that far,” Jason said under his breath. Charlie was about to ask what he meant, but it was obvious enough once Jason had dispensed with Charlie’s shoes and socks and pants. Charlie expected him to yank off his briefs, sensing his impatience. But Jason was taking his sweet time. Fully dressed, he perched at the end of the bed, and leered down at Charlie, idly caressing the backs of his legs with the tips of his fingers.

  Jason raised Charlie’s leg and seemed to marvel at his ankle, kissing it so softly that Charlie snorted a laugh at the ticklish sensation. But Jason wasn’t laughing. He looked very serious as he kissed his way down Charlie’s calf, so tightly muscular from all his biking. He worked his way down to two firm thighs. Charlie watched those thick-fingered squarish hands clutch the flesh there before he bowed his head and slowly and deliberately sucked a hickey to the inside of Charlie’s thigh. It took him by surprise and Charlie shut his eyes and writhed, but Jason held him fast.

  “Every inch of you,” Jason whispered, “is so fascinating…”

  Charlie’s cock was engorged, trapped in the prison of his briefs, and he nodded. “My dick is especially fascinating,” he said in a rush. “If you wanna... get to that soon. I mean no rush, but um... Fuck, rush.”

  He was used to focusing on his partner’s pleasure in bed. Guys loved that, and he loved pleasing them. Even considering that he usually bottomed, he couldn’t remember the last time he’d just lay still and let someone pleasure him.

  It was harder than it looked.

  Being patient was difficult.

  Jason kept smirking up at Charlie as if he knew exactly how crazy to drive him. He grasped the waistband of Charlie’s tiny blue briefs and peeled them off his body, inch by agonizing inch. Charlie’s cock, pink and demanding, bobbed from a thatch of hair, and promptly keeled back against his stomach as if it had fainted.

  “I hate to rush,” Jason whispered. “When it’s important.”

  He didn’t go near Charlie’s cock, letting it sit there ignored. Instead, he sucked more kisses along his thighs. He got infuriatingly close but became obsessed with the V of Charlie’s hips, dipping his tongue into the two grooves there and biting gently.

  “I always thought that was hot,” he said matter-of-factly. He licked and sucked, and Charlie moaned and squirmed. “This V right here...on guys. Boy, am I a slow learner.”

  “But you learned,” Charlie said breathlessly. “That’s the important part.”

  “I love your body,” Jason said, speaking the words into his belly. “I love how it’s hard…” He pressed Charlie’s abdominals, making him gasp. A fire had broken out under his skin. He found a spare, lush bit of flesh along Charlie’s hips. He was good at working out and his body liked muscle, but it also liked the jelly donuts at Selkie Sugar. “And then it’s soft… I love the angles…”

  “You like men,” Charlie said. He pursed his lips and took a breath, but his cock was leaking. Jason would drive him mad, he was sure. “I get it.”

  “Well, I didn’t get it,” Jason said. He finally deigned to touch Charlie’s cock, wrapping his fingers around it and stroking it tentatively. Charlie grunted and sighed, squeezing his pillow. He was not prepared for the way the rough, broad pad of Jason’s thumb rubbed around the head of his cock and he whined, clenching his teeth. “I like you best though,” Jason said. “I like your body best too.”

  Too much, Charlie thought. He pressed his lips together.

  Jason buried his face between Charlie’s thighs as he stroked his dick. The combination of the hand-job and the beard bristle of Jason’s chin, rough on his sensitive skin, made him cry out.

  “Jason,” Charlie breathed. His voice had dropped a few octaves.

  “Yes,” Jason said. And finally, he raised his head and moved to take Charlie’s pleading cock between his lips.

  Charlie had fantasized about what this might be like dozens of times already, since perhaps the first moment they’d met. He’d imagined that Jason would be nervous about it, not that Charlie had known many newly realized bisexual men. Surely, a man like Jason would think a lot differently about having his dick sucked by a guy and sucking a dick.

  Jason did not seem nervous. He didn’t work up to it or take any tentative licks.

  He took Charlie’s cock, of average but not inconsiderable length and width, right down his throat and went to town as if he’d been drooling for it all his life. He was careful with his teeth, breathing through his nose as he wrapped his lips firmly around Charlie, sucking and tonguing the firm and salty skin he found there.

  Charlie watched him, his mouth hanging open. He was frozen on the bed, his every muscle tensed. His face was embarrassingly red, he was sure. He had wanted to come the moment Jason’s mouth touched him and that would be mortifying.

  It was taking every ounce of willpower not to come and he didn’t want to. He wanted to remain in this moment with Jason’s adoring mouth on him, and also he wanted to remain in the moment of cuddling after sex with nowhere to be, and in the moment of discussing Jason’s book over burgers, and even in the moment of Jason smiling warmly at his mother like a dutiful boyfriend who would marry you and adopt gorgeous babies with you and talk too much about his barbecue and make you pancakes on Sundays.

  “Ah!” Charlie threw his head back, his orgasm outrunning him and exploding into Jason’s waiting mouth. Jason, while talented with bestowing pleasure, was not used to someone else’s cum. Charlie watched his eyes water as he let Charlie’s dick out of his mouth with a little pop. “I... usually last longer,” he said, still catching his breath. “But you took me by surprise.”

  “Yeah." He coughed and wiped his mouth. He stared down at Charlie with soft, adoring e
yes. “You took me by surprise too.”

  15

  Jason

  “You’re staring at me,” Charlie said. He was smiling shyly as he stood next to Jason at the helm, the yacht leaving a white wake of foam as they plowed through the water with no particular destination other than: alone.

  “I like starin’ at you,” Jason said. He was steering a yacht in his underwear and his mouth still tasted like Charlie’s cum. His leg was in a foul mood, but it barely registered. It was more of a dull ache.

  “You’re a sweet talker.” Charlie wore only his briefs and they barely covered the essential bits. Jason had decided he was rather fond of those briefs. Charlie came up behind Jason and wrapped his arms around Jason’s naked waist, resting his head on his shoulder and kissing his neck idly. “Do you like Scrabble?”

  Jason tilted his head, feeling lazy and potentially lovesick as he bared his throat for more kisses. “Huh?” He thought he must have heard wrong.

  “Well, I saw it in a stack of board games,” Charlie murmured. “On the shelf behind the breakfast nook. We could play something. We could play naked Scrabble, if you want.”

  “We’re already naked,” Jason said.

  “We could get dressed,” Charlie said, licking a stripe along Jason’s salty throat. “And get naked again.”

  “Hmm. That’s funny…”

  Jason sighed, and Charlie started to suck a hickey just under his ear. He was sure his neck was already purple and bruised, just like Charlie’s thighs. He drove with one hand and reached up to yank hard on Charlie’s hair, hoping he had not entirely miscalculated. He hadn’t. Charlie gasped and let Jason pull his head back and his cock pressed into Jason’s hip.

  “I like that,” Charlie whispered. “It’s... just enough.”

  “Good.” Jason clapped his hand to the back of Charlie’s head and brought him down again for a wet kiss. “I would never want to hurt you.”