In My Heart

by E. L. Todd

  In My Heart

  Book Forty-Seven of The Forever and Ever Series

  E. L. Todd

  Chapter One

  Sean

  Scarlet ran her fingers down the front of my jacket, brushing out the non-existent wrinkles and making sure it was as crisp as possible. Her eyes focused on her hands and the details of the fabric.

  I watched her, memorizing every particular detail of her face. Over the course of our marriage we’d both changed slightly. There was a tiny crinkle around her eyes that was hardly noticeable. Her hands were weathered from typing and keeping up a home. But I didn’t notice these things because her beauty outshined everything else. When I looked at her, I saw her soul.

  Scarlet looked up at me, the endless look of affection glowing in her blue eyes. Skye and Roland both carried my trademark eyes, and sometimes I wished one of them had hers. Her hands rested on my chest. “You’ll be fine, Sean.”

  “I know.”

  She tilted her head slightly, examining me with meticulous detail. “You have nothing to be nervous about.”

  “I’m not nervous.”

  “Then what are you?” The lighting crew passed behind her, and the PA carried a glass of ice water to the table. Matt Lauer sat there, his black glasses on the bridge of his nose and his notes in front of him.

  But I only had eyes for her. “A man in love with his best friend.”

  Her eyes softened immediately. “You’re the greatest husband I ever could have asked for.”

  Those were the words I’d worked for during my entire marriage. “Thank you.”

  She gave me a soft kiss. “Show them what you’re made of, Sean Preston.”

  “I always do, Mrs. Preston.” I kissed her forehead before I walked onto the set. The red chair was ready for me, and on the table beside it was a glass of water. Once I took a seat a make up artist touched up my face then fingered my hair. When she was gone she stepped behind the camera.

  Matt handed his notes over and removed his glasses. “Ready for this, Mr. Preston?”

  “Ready.” I crossed my legs and sat exactly the way I did during meetings. Some of my clients said I was a little terrifying, at least the look in my eyes suggested it.

  The director started to count down. “3…2…” He held up a finger to indicate one. Then Matt started to speak. “Hello from NBE News, I’m Matt Lauer and I have an exclusive interview with the infamous Sean Preston, the CEO of PIXEL software and one of People’s Sexiest Man Alive.” He said everything in his typical newscaster voice. When he turned to me his voice changed slightly. “Thank you for joining us, Mr. Preston.”

  “Thanks for having me,” I said politely. I didn’t like being referred to as Mr. Preston. It was stiff and boring. But I didn’t think it would be good to allow him to refer to me as Sean on national television.

  “There’s been quite a scandal going around ever since that photo hit the front page of The New York Times.” He didn’t ask a question but that’s what good journalists did.

  “Yeah. It’s been rough.”

  “So, you’re here to tell the American people that photo wasn’t true? It was fabricated? Altered in some way?”

  “No.” I remained calm and hardly showed any emotion. “That photograph is real. It hasn’t been altered or changed in any way to incriminate me.”

  “Then what rebuttal do you have?” He crossed his leg over his knee and rested his hands in his lap.

  “That picture was taken in the span of a nanosecond.” I went with the truth because there was no other alternative. My father told me to always be honest. It was the only way you could live a free life. “What the public is seeing is truth in that nanosecond. But what happened before and after the photo was taken is more important. I asked the young woman to get off me but she refused. That’s when the picture was taken.”

  “But why were you in that environment at all?”

  “I had a business meeting.”

  “In a strip club?” Matt asked with a raised eyebrow.

  I didn’t rise to his emotion. If I did, it would make me look guilty. “When I walked inside I thought it was a bar. I didn’t realize it was a strip club until much later. And after I suggested we have the meeting in more appropriate place my client refused.”

  “And that’s when the lap dances started?”

  The cameras were on me, and the lighting made it impossible for me to react without giving away my anger. “My client requested that. When she was on me I simply couldn’t push her off—at least without hurting her.”

  Matt nodded. “So, this whole thing is a misunderstanding?”

  “Entirely,” I said. “While I value the view of the public, my employees, and my customers, it doesn’t matter to me what everyone thinks. I know what happened, so if you choose to hate me that’s your own right. But don’t expect me to care.”

  Matt remained collected the entire time. “With all due respect, Mr. Preston, if that’s the case why are you here?”

  It was a good question. “Out of respect for my wife and kids. I don’t want people to think I would do such a thing to my own family. I’ve been married for over twenty years and not once have I ever strayed from the promises we made to each other. I love my wife with everything I have and I wouldn’t tarnish the beautiful thing we have for a cheap lap dance in a strip club that reeks of booze. I’m still the family man everyone has pegged me to be—through and through.”

  Matt hid his thoughts behind his eyes. He had the best poker face I’ve ever seen. “Does your wife believe you?”

  “She believed me the second I told her what happened. If I hadn’t said anything to her and she saw those tabloids first, she wouldn’t have believed it for a second. That’s the kind of woman I married—incredible.”

  He moved onto the next question like he hadn’t listened to my answer. “How are your kids handling this?”

  “They’re okay,” I said. “My wife raised our kids to be strong and fearless. They stand beside me like they always have. We’re a family, and we stick together.”

  The interview continued for another thirty minutes. He asked me details about that night and tried to understand why I would agree to such a meeting at all. Not wanting to cause more confrontation with Keith I left his name out of it.

  “What’s the message you want our viewers to take home this evening?” Matt held a pen between his fingers. Sometimes he fidgeted with it when the camera was on me and not him.

  “My family is the most important thing to me. And it’ll always be the most important thing.”

  ***

  I held Scarlet’s hand as I drove out of the city and to our estate in Connecticut. The sun had set long ago, and the darkness enveloped us on all sides. The air was chilly, but the engine from my Ferrari kept us warm.

  Scarlet’s thumb moved across my knuckles. “You did great tonight.”

  It was the first time we spoke since we left the studio. I didn’t like talking about my personal life with anyone outside our group, let alone on national television, but I had to set the record straight. I wouldn’t let people think Scarlet wasn’t treated right. I didn’t want to go down in history as a pig. I loved my wife and I was faithful to her—always. Doubting my integrity was the most insulting thing you could ever do to me. “Thanks.”

  “If anyone doesn’t believe you, they’re stupid.”

  “Anyone who reads the tabloids is stupid.”

  Her eyes were on me. “Who cares what anyone thinks. I know what really happened, so does everyone else we care about. If anyone gives you a hard time about it, just ignore them.”

  “You don’t understand.” She would never understand.

  “Then help me understand it.”

  “I’m a Preston. We aren’t known for our
wealth, charity donations, and kingly blood. We’re known for our loyalty, integrity, and devotion. I’m devoted to you and it’s insulting for anyone to think I do anything less than worship the ground you walk on.”

  She used her other hand to rub my arm. “Let it go.”

  “It’s my reputation, Scarlet. If I screwed up I would admit it and take the fall for it. But to be persecuted for something I didn’t even do…is just wrong.”

  “People will forget this whole incident and move on with their lives—like they always do.”

  But how long would that take? How long would people look at me like I was a cheater? A liar? A playboy? I saw the looks people gave me at the office or when I went out to lunch with Mike. It made me want to scream.

  I pulled through the gates and watched them close behind me in the rear view mirror. Then I pulled into our garage before I shut the door behind me.

  “If you went on national television just to show you have nothing to hide, I think that would convince anybody. If you really were guilty you would refuse to comment.”

  But would people realize that?

  “Let’s go inside and take a shower. That always calms you down.”

  Nothing could calm me down now.

  Scarlet watched me from the passenger seat, knowing I was still in a sour mood. She leaned over the center console then brushed her lips passed mine. I wasn’t in the mood for affection but I couldn’t turn her away. She gave me a slow kiss on the lips. It was purposeful and soft, but it told me how much she loved me despite its intensity. Like always, my body melted at her touch. She could sheathe my anger like a sword.

  She pulled away, a triumphant smile on her face. “Come on. There’s a few areas I can’t reach with my bar of soap…”

  ***

  Mike stood in front of my desk, his hands resting together in front of his waist. He just handed me a report and now he stood there in silence—which was extremely unusual.

  I stopped reading and looked up at him. “What?”

  “Nothing.” He kept staring at me.

  “Why do you keep staring at me then?”

  “I’m not.”

  “You so are.”

  He dropped his arms to his sides. “Are you okay?”

  “Do I look like I’m not okay?”

  His eyes turned angry. “You’re being an ass so it doesn’t seem like it.”

  “I’m just stressed out.” I threw the report down. I wasn’t reading it anyway.

  “The interview went great. Your ratings are going up.”

  It didn’t matter whether they went up or down. “This whole thing shouldn’t have happened at all.”

  “That’s what you’re pissed about?” he asked. “You can’t change the past so just let it go.”

  “I’ve made a mockery of our family name over this.”

  “Whatever.” He rolled his eyes. “None of us care. We all know the truth. If people don’t like us I don’t give a damn. You think Conrad didn’t drag our name through the mud with the whole Georgia Price bullshit? No one is perfect. You need to stop holding yourself to this ridiculous standard.”

  I wasn’t sure why I did it to begin with. “I want to make Dad proud.”

  “He is proud of us,” Mike said. “We both made our own families and we take care of them. We’re exactly the kind of men he wants us to be. I treat Cassandra like a queen and you treat Scarlet the same way. Don’t get me started on our kids. They’re spoiled rotten.”

  “I guess…”

  “Just chill out, alright? I know that’s hard for you to do but give it a try.”

  I sank further into my chair, knowing that was impossible.

  Mike backed away from my desk. “I have to get to that meeting downstairs. Sit here and just relax.”

  “I am relaxed.”

  “No, you aren’t. You’re hostility is infecting the air.” He stopped when he reached the door. “Unless you want me to call up Scar?”

  I would love to see her. I wish I could see her every second of the day. She was my talisman, my guardian. Only she could talk me off the ledge even when one foot was hanging over the edge. “Shut up and go away.”

  He shut the door and left me in peace.

  ***

  The day was almost over when a woman walked into my office.

  I took one look at her and knew I recognized her from somewhere. I couldn’t quite place it. Her face was different, like it was altered in some way. But that look in her eye was too familiar.

  “Don’t recognize me without my tits hanging out?” She put one hand on her hip and shifted her weight to one leg.

  My blood started to boil. “Is there something I can help you with, miss?” I wanted to call her a different name but she might be wearing a wire.

  “Actually, there is.” She sat down in the cushioned armchair.

  It disgusted me that she touched something in my office, a place where my wife had sat. “Get on with it. I’ve got to get home to my wife.”

  “Then I’ll make it quick,” she said. “Twenty million dollars right now and I won’t talk.”

  I should have known this wasn’t over. “Won’t talk about what?”

  “All the sexy looks you gave me. How you tried to buy me for the night. How you patted your thigh and asked me to take your lap for a ride,” She crossed her legs like she was some kind of lady.

  She was blackmailing me? “You want me to pay you twenty million dollars so you won’t go off and tell the media a bunch of lies?”

  “Maybe you think they’re lies but I don’t.”

  This was unbelievable.

  “What will it be, Mr. Preston? Are you really that much of a family man?” She had a ridiculous smile on her face, like she thought she won the battle.

  “I’m not paying you a dime. You’ll be stripping for the rest of your life.” I pointed to the door and silently asked her to leave.

  Her smile fell instantly. “You think I won’t go to the media? Because I will. They’ve already asked for my side of the story.”

  “Tell them whatever you want. I’m not giving away the money my family worked so hard for to get some whore to shut her mouth. I didn’t do anything wrong so I’m not cooperating with you.”

  Her face turned red, pissed she wasn’t getting her away. “What will your beloved wife think? She’ll pack her things and leave.”

  I couldn’t keep the laugh back. “You think the woman I’ve been married to for twenty years is going to take your word over mine?” I shook my head. “I haven’t even looked at another woman since the day she became mine. Good luck convincing her otherwise.” I grabbed my satchel and pulled it over my chest. “Now if you excuse me, I have a life to get to.”

  ***

  I grabbed the entryway table and slammed it to the ground, knocking over the vase on top and hearing it shatter into pieces across the tile. My ferocity got the best of me and I flipped out like a maniac.

  Scarlet came out of the kitchen and looked at the mess I made. But she was calm, like always. “Had a bad day…?”

  “The stripper from the club said she would tell everyone what a sleazebag I am unless I give her twenty million dollars.”

  Scarlet didn’t look surprised at all. “I’m sorry, sweetheart.”

  “Why won’t this just go away?” I grabbed the next thing I could get my hands on and prepared to smash it on the ground.

  “Not that.” Scarlet quickly took it from my hands. “Your mother gave this to me for our anniversary ten years ago.” She set it on the other table, out of my reach. “But everything else is fair game.”

  I rubbed my temples and felt the storm start to brew.

  “Sean.” Scarlet grabbed both of my hands. “I know it doesn’t seem like it, but it will be okay.”

  “No, it won’t. Not unless I pay her the money.”

  “You aren’t giving her a dime. The U. S. doesn’t negotiate with terrorists and neither will you. Do you understand me?”

  Scarlet
took my side, like always. “Yes.”

  “Don’t let her get under your skin. You think everyone is really going to believe her over you? After all the beautiful things you said? No, I don’t believe that.’ She cupped my cheeks and looked into my eyes. “No matter what happens, this doesn’t change. Ever.”

  That was the only thing keeping me going. “I know.”

  Chapter Two

  Trinity

  The annual Manhattan fashion show was that evening, and I planned to attend to represent my clothing line. Fashions shows were a hit or a miss. Sometimes they were great for networking, and other times I just wanted to leave.

  “You don’t have to come with me, Slade.” I transferred a few things from my purse to my clutch.

  “I don’t mind.” He stood beside me, his eyes glued to mine. “I’m proud of you, baby.”

  “I know you are.” Honestly, I didn’t want him there. He stole the spotlight from me with his looks and charm. Any other time I wouldn’t care, but I really didn’t want to be remembered by my colleagues as Slade’s wife.

  “So, let me come along.”

  “Honestly, I’d rather go alone.”

  His eyes darkened in sadness.

  “You steal all the spotlight and everyone pays attention to you and not me.” How was I supposed to work with that? It was totally counter productive. “And now that you’re a recording artist people are going to be even more infatuated with you.”

  He sighed in guilt then nodded. “True…”

  “I’ll be fine on my own,” I said. “It’s just a social event. I doubt anyone will even pay attention to the clothes.”

  “Why don’t you take Skye with you? Or your mom?”

  “No, I work better alone.”

  “Okay.” Slade finally dropped the argument. “You look really sexy tonight.” He looked me up and down, his eyes focusing on my small bump.

  I wore a skin-tight black dress with red pumps. My small stomach showed slightly through the fabric. Some people may notice I’m pregnant but most of them wouldn’t. I wanted to show it off. I was going to be a mother very soon, and I was definitely proud. “Thank you.”