In My Heart

by E. L. Todd

  I couldn’t stop shaking. I’d been scared in my life but this was a whole new level. I was completely alone, defenseless, and I had a little one to think about. A violent fight could cost me more than I could afford. “Please…”

  He moved in further, his hand wrapping around my neck. “I remember the first time I saw you. It was across the room at a benefit. You were the most gorgeous thing I’d ever seen. And I haven’t stopped thinking about you since that moment.”

  I couldn’t breathe.

  My entire body screamed.

  I was cornered and defenseless.

  And I was scared. “Let me go and we’ll forget this whole thing.”

  “I’ll never be able to forget this.” He leaned in, his lips aiming for mine. Once his mouth was pressed into my skin I wanted to vomit. All my freedom was stripped away from me. I felt like a slave with no rights, like an animal.

  I bit him hard.

  “Damn.” He pulled away and wiped the blood from his lip. The anger shined in his eyes but he didn’t raise a hand to strike me. His fingers were still secured around my throat. “You’ve got spunk.” With supernatural strength, he bent me over on the desk and pulled my skirt up over my ass.

  “Stop!” I tried to kick him off. “You’re a monster.”

  He used his body to keep me down as his fingers trailed up the back of my thigh. “I love your legs.”

  I tried to buck him off again.

  He kissed the back of my neck as his hand moved up my ass then felt my panties.

  I wanted to cry. “Stop. I’ll give you whatever you want.”

  “I already have everything,” he whispered into my ear. “Except you.” His fingers grazed my opening then moved inside. I was drier than the sun so his fingers felt intrusive.

  Feeling his hands on me, touching me in a way only Slade was allowed made me want to vomit and cry at the same time. I did nothing to deserve this, but yet, it was happening.

  Maximum moaned into my ear. “Your pussy is tight.”

  I tried to kick him again. “Let go of me.”

  “I will…when I’m finished.”

  I tried to elbow him in the face but he held my hand down.

  “I know you want this. You shouldn’t fight it.” He kept fingering me, using two fingers to stretch me.

  I wanted to die. I just wanted to stop living. I was humiliated and broken.

  Maximum loosened his hold on one hand and undid his slacks.

  No, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t let him inside me.

  No. No. No.

  I spotted the loaded stapler on the corner of the desk. Without thinking twice about it I snatched it then threw all my weight backwards, slamming the metal into his skull as hard as possible.

  “Fuck.” He fell to the ground, his pants loose around his waist.

  I threw the stapler at him again, grabbed my purse off the floor, and then ran like hell.

  I made it out of the office and down the hallway. The stairs were located next to the elevator. I was a fast runner but something told me Maximum was faster. I made it to the end of the hall and knew I only had a second to think.

  I hit the button on the elevator and the doors opened. Then I hit the lobby button before I ran out again. I ducked for cover underneath one of the desks and watched the hallway through the small crack at the corner of the desk.

  Maximum’s heavy footsteps sounded on the hardwood floor before he appeared in my view. He stopped in front of the elevator and looked at the numbers shown on the top. The numbers were descending, going down to the lobby.

  He sprinted into the stairwell, intending to catch up to me at the bottom floor.

  I was holding my breath the entire time, and now that he was gone I gasped for air. I was hyperventilating and unable to catch my breath. My body kept shaking in fright. I wanted to sit there and never move but I knew I needed to keep going. Eventually, Maximum would figure out I hadn’t gone downstairs.

  Then he would come back up here looking for me.

  ***

  The second Skye opened the door and looked at me she knew something was seriously wrong. “Oh my god, what happened?”

  I cried the entire drive and I knew my make up had smeared all over my face. My hands were still shaking and everything about me felt off. “Cayson?” I couldn’t form words at that moment.

  “He’s in the shower.”

  “I don’t want to see him. I can’t see him…”

  “Okay.” Skye’s face reflected mine, looking terrible. “I can ask him to stay upstairs.”

  I nodded.

  “Okay.” She left me at the doorstep then ran upstairs.

  I walked inside and shut the door behind me. Instinctively, I locked it.

  Skye returned. “He’s going to watch TV in the bedroom.”

  “Did you tell him something was wrong?”

  “No, I just said you needed to talk about pregnancy stuff and you didn’t want him to hear any of it.”

  “Okay…” I nodded and felt the pain just from doing that.

  “Trinity, talk to me.” She put her arm around my shoulders and guided me to the couch. “Is it Slade? Did something happen? What’s going on?”

  I eyed Cedric in his playpen but even that couldn’t make me feel better. “Maximum…”

  Skye stared at me without blinking. “The designer? What happened? Did he do something to you?” The protective side of her emerged, breathing fire.

  I nodded but didn’t tell her the story. It was still so raw. It just happened like twenty minutes ago.

  “Trinity, it’s me. Talk to me.” She grabbed my hand and held it.

  “I told him I was too busy to work with him anymore.” My voice was full of tears. “He was quiet most of the time then he hung up. I thought everything was over and done with…until he came to my office.”

  “No…”

  “I stayed late so no one else was there. He walked in and…” I didn’t want to finish the sentence. If I told her the truth that would mean everything was real. I covered my face with my palms and started to sob.

  “No…” Skye was just as hurt as I was. “He didn’t…please tell me he didn’t.”

  I lowered my hands so I could talk. “He kissed me but I bit his lip as hard as I could…”

  “Good.”

  “But then he bent me over the desk and…used his fingers.”

  Skye closed her eyes at the blow.

  “He kept feeling me. When he undid his pants one of my hands was free so I grabbed the stapler and slammed it into his head.”

  “Did you kill him?” Skye asked hopefully.

  “No. I just knocked him out long enough to get away. I didn’t know what else to do so I came here…”

  “Does Slade know?”

  I shook my head. “No.”

  Skye grabbed her cell phone from the coffee table. “We need to call the police.”

  “No.” I pushed the phone down. “We can’t do that.”

  “What?” Skye snapped. “Why the hell not? You have enough evidence with his bloody lip.”

  “You already know how that will go. The second a woman accuses a man of rape she loses. It’s stupid, I know. But it’s the truth. He has so much more power than I do, and everyone in the world won’t know me for my clothing line or accomplishments. I’ll just be the girl who accused Maximum Shot of rape.” I pulled my hand back to my chest.

  Skye continued to squeeze the phone. “So, we just let him get away with it?”

  “I guess…”

  “And you don’t think he’ll try again?” Skye snapped. “Trinity, you’re forgetting who our fathers are. We’ll bring him down so hard the ground will shake.”

  “I can’t tell my father about this.” The idea made me want to cry harder. “I can’t do that to him. If he knew…he would never recover. It’s a father’s worst nightmare.”

  Skye’s voice turned gentle. “I admit it’s hard but he would want justice for you. Just because Maximum Shot is o
ne of the wealthiest and most successful people in the world doesn’t mean he’s immune to the law.”

  “I know…I’m just being practical.”

  “No, you’re being scared,” Skye said. “He’s less likely to bother you again behind bars than as a free man.”

  “Well, I’m never going to work again so he won’t have a chance.”

  “Never going to work again?” Skye asked.

  “I’m quitting. I’ll find another CEO and I’ll do designs at home. I’ll fax them in so I never have to set foot in that place again.”

  Her anger peeked. “How is that fair? Why do you have to stop doing what you love because of some asshole?”

  “It’s not just because of him,” I said. “It’s everyone. It’s the Caribbean all over again. I have some kind of target written somewhere and men love to knock me around. I just want to stay home.”

  “And live under a rock?” Skye asked.

  “Look, you don’t know what it’s like so don’t tell me how I should feel.”

  “I’m not.” Skye placed a gentle hand on my shoulder. “I just think you should focus your efforts on nailing this guy rather than running away.”

  I covered my face again. “I just want to die, Skye. I just want to die.”

  She put her arm around me and rocked me gently. “It’ll be okay, Trinity. I know it doesn’t seem like it right now but it will.”

  “No, it won’t.” I sniffed.

  “Slade will put you back together like he always does.”

  “I can’t tell him about this,” I whispered.

  “Why not?”

  “I just can’t. Everything will be different. He’ll never look at me the same again.”

  “That’s not true,” Skye argued.

  “Yes it is. And he’ll go off the deep end and kill Maximum. He’ll ruin his entire career over this. And he’ll never leave my side again. He’ll never go on tour or become a rock star. He’ll drop everything to take care of me. I can’t let that happen…”

  Skye rubbed my back for several minutes. “I admit you’re right. Slade would do all of those things. But you’re forgetting the fact he wants to do all of those things. You’re the number one thing in his life, Trinity.”

  “Which is why I can’t hurt him…”

  “Trinity—”

  “I’ll quit my job and travel with Slade after the baby comes. We’ll be a family, a traveling circus. Everything will be fine.”

  “And you really think you’ll be happy handing off your company to someone else?” Skye asked. “Letting go of your greatest accomplishment to take a backseat and watch Slade live out his dream.”

  “I’ll be happy enough,” I whispered.

  Skye sighed.

  “Don’t tell Cayson or Slade any of this.” I wiped away my tears and gave her a meaningful look. “I mean it, Skye. You can’t say anything.”

  Skye bit her bottom lip like I just asked her for the impossible.

  “I wouldn’t have come to you unless I knew you could keep my secret.”

  “Slade is your husband. He should know—”

  “No.”

  “Trinity—”

  “I said no. Now, can I count on you?”

  She bowed her head and looked at the ground. “Of course. I just hope you change your mind.”

  I knew I never would.

  Chapter Eleven

  Slade

  Being a rock star was exhausting.

  I thought it would be simple. I would play music all day long and just kick back.

  Nope. Recording the album wasn’t even fun anymore. I played the same song fifty five times.

  Fifty-five.

  Because the other fifty-four weren’t good enough, apparently.

  My fingers were sore and practically nubs, and I was mentally exhausted for the rest of the day. Making a polished product was fine but they worked me like cattle to make it come out just right.

  Hopefully, the other aspects of it would be more fun. Writing the music was what I enjoyed to begin with. Too bad I couldn’t just do that.

  When I came home Trinity didn’t have anything made for dinner. If she was home before me she usually took care of it, but lately she seemed forgetful. We hadn’t had sex in a few days because she was always too tired.

  It was a complete one eighty compared to last week.

  “Hey, baby.” I walked to the couch and kissed her on the temple.

  “Hey…” She flipped through the magazine with a weak wrist. She didn’t even make eye contact with me when I greeted her.

  “Everything okay?”

  “Yeah…just tired.”

  My hand moved to her stomach, and immediately she flinched. Her entire body was tense like she had no idea what I was doing or why I was doing it. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

  “Yeah…just haven’t been sleeping well.”

  I ran my fingers over her stomach gently. “Is he doing okay?”

  “He’s the same as always.”

  I eyed the empty kitchen and felt my stomach growl. “What do you want for dinner?”

  “I don’t know. I’m not hungry.”

  “Did you already eat?” She usually waited until I got home.

  “No. Just don’t have much of an appetite.”

  She wasn’t sleeping or eating. Was there something seriously wrong? “Trinity, I think we should go to the doctor.”

  “Why?”

  “I’m worried about you. You haven’t been yourself lately. Let’s get checked out.”

  “Oh, I’m fine.” She closed the magazine. “Just the hormones and everything…”

  “Well, you should be eating regardless. I’ve always been irritated with your diet, but you have to think about the little guy inside you. You can’t starve yourself.”

  Guilt washed over her face like a heavy rain. “You’re right…”

  “I’m going to cook us something and you better eat all of it.”

  She nodded.

  At least she was listening to me. “Just sit back and relax and I’ll take care of it.”

  “Okay. Thank you.”

  “No problem.” I leaned down to kiss her on the mouth.

  She immediately tucked her hair behind her hair and turned her face, giving me her cheek.

  I paused before I placed my lips on her skin. It was almost a cold shoulder, but I couldn’t think of any reason why she would do that. Maybe her hormones really were making her act up. Just last week she wanted to have sex around the clock. Now her legs were closed tighter than a locked door.

  Since she was under the weather I let it go. I kissed her on the cheek then walked into the kitchen.

  ***

  I had a few days off because my voice was becoming strained. Singing eight hours a day was painful on the vocal chords. If Don Murray had it his way he’d work me like a mule. But I put my foot down and said I needed the rest.

  After I showered and got ready for work I realized Trinity hadn’t gotten up yet. Her alarm didn’t go off, and if she didn’t get ready soon she would be late to work.

  “Baby.” I sat at the edge of the bed and shook her gently. “It’s time to wake up.”

  She moaned and buried her face into the pillow.

  I rubbed her back gently, massaging the tiny muscles of her back. “Come on.” I never had to pull her out of bed like this. It was strange. “Your alarm didn’t go off.”

  “Because I didn’t set it.”

  “You aren’t going to work today?” My hand stopped in between her shoulder blades.

  “No, I’m just going to work from home.”

  Trinity always had that luxury but she never took it. Not once did she work from home. “Trinity, are you sure there’s nothing wrong?”

  “Yes,” she said with a sigh. “I just want to stay home today.”

  Something in my gut said something was wrong. Trinity was never lazy, but all she’d been was lifeless. Whenever I came home she was quiet. She never had any energ
y. She was practically a zombie.

  ***

  Cayson answered his cell phone. “Hey, I’m surprised you still have time for me.”

  “Shut the hell up. You know me. I’ll never change.”

  “I bet anything you’re only calling because you need something.”

  “Well…” That was true in this particular incidence.

  “What did I tell you?” he said triumphantly.

  “Hey, we just got a beer together last week. Don’t act like I’m the first most important thing in your life. War Chief bumped me down to second.”

  “Actually, you were bumped down to third.”

  “Third?” I asked. “How is that right?”

  “Uh, Skye?”

  “Oh yeah.” I rolled my eyes. “I forgot about her.”

  “Like always,” he said. “So, what do you want?”

  “I need to talk to you, from a doctor’s point of view.”

  “Slade, I’m not a doctor.”

  “But you’re pretty close. And I’m asking for husband advice too.”

  “Well, you’ve been married longer than I have. I’d say you know more than me.”

  It definitely wasn’t true in this case. “Just shut up and listen.”

  “Okay.” He fell silent.

  “Trinity has been acting weird for days now. She’s always tired, she never wants to be affectionate with me, whenever I want to have sex she’s not into it, and she didn’t go to work today. Whenever I ask if something is wrong she always says everything is fine. But I know that isn’t true.”

  “What’s your question?” Cayson asked.

  “I don’t really know…I just think something is wrong but she won’t tell me.”

  “Well…I know she came to the house a few days ago,” Cayson said. “Skye said she wanted to talk about her pregnancy or something.”

  This was news to me. “Trinity went to your place?”

  “Yeah.”

  She never told me that. “What did she say?”

  “I don’t know,” Cayson said. “Skye asked me to stay upstairs so they could have girl talk.”

  This sounded worse with every passing second. “She’s hiding something from me.”

  “I wouldn’t jump to that conclusion. Maybe Trinity just wanted to talk about pregnancy since Skye has already been through it. And maybe she thought it would gross you out or something.”