Balder

by Camille Oster

  The darkness was becoming oppressive and his lungs ached for air. The lack of air would not kill him. As a god, he was made of sturdier stuff than a human. It still wasn't pleasant, though.

  How long would he be falling, he wondered. Eventually, a sickly green started appearing in the darkness below, but it could have been his imagination. Then structures. Hard to make out because they were as black as the darkness around it. Stone reflecting the green light that seemed to come out of a well. Strange place to have a well, but perhaps this hall had once had another purpose. Nidhogg certainly hadn't built it.

  The chain around his shoulder weighed him down as his feet landed on the solid stone, and he waded through to the main hall. There was nothing outside, except the stone walkway and a well that provided light. For a moment, he thought the entire hall was in the water, until he walked through some kind of barrier, like a rush of water, emerging into a bubble of air.

  The air smelled putrid and his stomach rolled with it. No gentle breezed down here. Perhaps the same air had been trapped for centuries, millennia even. Ahead of him stood the door to the hall, black and decaying wood. The handle was a blade that would cut any hand that pressed on it. Above the door was written 'Anguish.' Nice, Balder thought. This was a place of punishment and Nidhogg reveled in the task.

  Would there be some trap on the door he wondered and he looked around, but there was nothing but the knife for a handle. There was nothing for it but to open the door. He hadn't time to waste.

  Using the chain, he pressed down on the handle, Gungnir at the ready in his other hand. The smell was even worse inside, a carpet of bones and half-eaten flesh. Balder had to stop himself from throwing up and he cursed silently as he stepped over the threshold. A hole in the ground ahead of him was obviously where Nidhogg disposed of his leftovers, but the creature was by no means tidy. Apparently, he lived to keep his food all over the floor.

  There was nowhere to step, so brittle bone cracked under his feet and stuff he didn't want to identify squished. The walls moved and as he looked closer, he could see snakes sewn into the walls forming them. As he had been told, venom dripped from the ceiling and he forced himself not to look up. This was Nidhogg's lair and he used it like a serpent would.

  It wasn't silent inside. The snakes slithered and there were moans. There were people down here and it gave Balder hope. "Hoder," he called, but there was no answer. His hope faltered a bit.

  Someone scuttled with a dragging leg. Was this Hoder? A man appeared in the direction of the noise, but he kept moving as if Balder wasn't there. Not only a broken leg, but a broken arm. What was this place Hoder had existed in?

  There were other people as Balder walked further into the hall, huddled along the walls, their clothes ragged and torn. A woman was curled in a ball with her head laid down.

  "I seek my brother Hoder," he said again.

  "Please end me," the woman moaned, and she looked up. Her eyes were missing. "Please."

  Like all the people here, she had done something to be here. This was where the people all wanted to forget went and it was awful. Just desserts for what they had done as living.

  "I seek my brother," he repeated. "Hoder."

  "The ancient one?" a man asked. He stood on weak legs. The man had once been big and strong, but his flesh was hanging off him now like an ill-fitting coat.

  "Yes."

  "He is in there," the man said, pointing and the pasty flesh on his arm wobbled. Following the direction, Balder looked at a doorway and stepped toward it. Something he had assumed was dead grabbed his ankle and he looked down to an open, aching mouth. Nothing else he saw made sense, so he struck down with his spear and a gasping sound ceased the hold on his ankle. The being's misery ended.

  If he was kind, he would kill every person in here, but it wasn't his right. This was their punishment and it wasn't his due to circumvent it. This poor creature had suffered enough though, as had Hoder. The ancient one, they called him. They didn't even know his name. This made Balder fear what state he would find Hoder in, but at least he existed. He was here.

  It was deeply unpleasant walking into the darkness of the doorway. There was no light inside. "Hoder," he called. "I have come to retrieve you."

  There was a shuffle in the darkness. "Leave," a croaking voice said. Was this his brother? It was impossible to tell.

  "Come into the light."

  Cracking noises came next, then shuffling. "The serpent will return and he will kill you."

  Out came a man with snow white hair and a beard down to his knees. His body was bent and decrepit, but he wasn't half-eaten like some of the others. Time had eaten Hoder. The skin was pallid and wrinkled, it was impossible to see the resemblance. Rheumy eyes had no color.

  "I have come to collect you."

  Hoder looked up, the bones in his neck grinding as he did. "You must hurry. He comes now. Go before you are seen."

  "I am not leaving you here."

  "I deserve to be here for the things I have done."

  "And you have been here. Now it is a new cycle. It is time to rebuild, and you must do your part."

  "He comes," Hoder warned, his non-existent lips quivering. "It is too late. He will find you here.” Hoder was crying. “You shouldn't have come. He will punish us for this." Quivering in fear, Hoder returned to the darkness of the room or hollow he had been existing in.

  Balder wanted to ask him not to, but there was little he could do in this coming fight. Around him, the people started screaming, all fearing the arrival of their punisher.

  The entire building shook as the serpent landed outside. Balder regripped his spear. Not being able to kill this beast was a problem. How did one defeat such a creature without killing it? If he did, he would have to kill Hel too, or she would end humanity. Her rage would be unending. It was a rage he had witnessed before. Once she raged, nothing but bloodshed appeased her.

  The doors burst open and Balder heard the detritus on the floor crunch under the serpent's belly.

  "Go unseen," Hoder called from inside the darkness of the doorway.

  "No, I have come to retrieve you, and my quest has not changed."

  Turning back, Balder steeled himself. This had to be done. He had known it from the moment he had decided to do this.

  Chapter 26

  THE SERPENT STOPPED and Balder heard its tongue coming out, scenting the air. Nidhogg knew he was there. Probably the only thing around here that smelled of fresh air and sunshine.

  Nidhogg was too heavy to move silently. Well, that was what you got for living in an untidy hall. But Nidhogg moved quickly, striking in Balder's vicinity. Balder was quick too. Compared to Hoder, Hel had kept him well-fed and fit all this time. Perhaps he needed to thank her for that.

  Using the spear, he swung it and struck the serpent on the side of the head. It was not a killing blow, but it wasn't hard enough to even stun the beast.

  The pitiful residents of the hall were scrambling to get out of the way, their survival instincts still intact even after they prayed for death.

  Nidhogg cornered him and Balder used the spear to keep him away. The creature didn't know that he couldn't kill him, which was something he would capitalize on. Brandishing the spear, he shifted as Nidhogg tried to find a way around it.

  Taking the chance, the serpent struck, but Balder slid under the arc of Nidhogg's neck, through the nastiness on the floor. It was not the time to worry about being squeamish.

  Running, Balder moved away from Nidhogg, who was a little cumbersome in shifting back on himself. The serpent struck at the column Balder had taken refuge behind, the column shattering with the full weight of the creature. Too many columns destroyed and the whole hall would come down. Bringing the hall down would be an option, but there were too many things that could go wrong.

  The woman that had beseeched Balder earlier, ran out as the serpent was striking again and she was torn apart by the creature's jaw, getting the end to her existence she had wanted. It s
tunned and confused Nidhogg for a moment, because it had taken him by surprise.

  Balder used that moment to shift, trying to find some vantage point. How in the world was he going to do this without running the creature through? If not for the fact that the creature had to live, it was only a matter of striking at its heart.

  The serpent was behind him and Balder, through his momentum, jumped up on the wall and sprang back, again whacking the creature's head. Hard enough to stun him for a moment. But Nidhogg returned angrier and more forceful, lashing his powerful tail at Balder.

  In the skirmish, Balder had dropped the heavy chain. It was too cumbersome to fight with, but eventually, it was what he needed to subdue the creature. Easier said than done.

  Leaping over another powerful swing of the tail, Balder made his way back to the chain, picking it up to swing around his head.

  "Tie a stone to it," he heard Hoder say.

  That was a good idea. With a stone, he could sledge the creature. But the only suitable stone was on the other side of the hall.

  "Take care, he comes," Hoder said with a croaking, failing voice.

  Nidhogg's head pierced down for another strike, close enough that Balder could see it's long, poisonous fangs. Putrefying bodies did little for his breath and a wave of revulsion distracted Balder for a second. It did, however, give Balder a chance to grab on to one of the scales at the back of his head.

  Not liking this, Nidhogg moved sharply, almost flicking Balder off. With all his might, Balder punched the creatures head, but he was hitting bone. It wasn't going to make a dent.

  Just in time, he saw Nidhogg's intention of scraping him along one of the columns, escaping just in time. It had brought him closer to the stone he needed.

  Going for the stone, a lash of Nidhogg's tail caught him, sending him forcefully into the wall. The knock was so hard, his mind faltered for a moment. Gungnir clattered to the ground and snake bodies were curling around his limbs and he had to pull himself away. They might capture humans, but they were not strong enough for him.

  Grabbing the spear, he had to pierce Nidhogg as he struck down again. The creature wailed in pain, but luckily it wasn't a fatal piercing. Balder had acted purely on instinct, so it could very well have been a fatal strike without him being aware of it. He had to do better. That had been too close.

  His head ached from where he had hit the wall and blood was obscuring his vision. Wiping it away only made his hand slippery, which wasn't good. But he reached the stone and again had to dodge the gaping jaw coming toward him. Heaving the stone, he shoved it into Nidhogg's throat, the unexpected weight bearing down Nidhogg's head. It wasn't that Nidhogg wasn't strong enough; it had just been unexpected.

  The creature choked then spat the stone out, it's weight pounding dully on the ground, a bit closer to where the chain was.

  "Cheers," Balder said in thanks. "I will drink to your assistance later."

  The serpent's head turned from side to side, honing in on its prey. No, you won't be winning just yet, Balder thought, getting ready to dodge another strike. Balder feigned left, then leap right. The serpent's head followed, striking a hair's breadth too slowly. Sharp fangs tore the shirt he wore down the back.

  Hoder was holding the chain with his bent body.

  "Throw it," Balder called, but it fell pitifully short as he did. Hoder's frail arms weren't strong enough. "That's alright, it's fine."

  Balder dived for the chain, Nidhogg's tail wooshing over his head. Rising as quick as he could, Balder swung the chain till it encircled the serpent's neck. It wouldn't hold him, but hopefully it would distract him. Fiercely, Nidhogg pulled away and the chain ran.

  Grabbing the other end, Balder tied it around the rock before Nidhogg was able to run the whole length of the chain. Free of the chain, Nidhogg came back, but Balder had a suitable weapon now and swung the stone attached to the end of the chain, clapping Nidhogg on the head. It stunned the creature for a moment, making it cringe back. This was more effective than the spear, which was now lying on the floor beside Balder.

  Nidhogg dodged another swing, angling to get close enough to strike. Beside him, Hoder grabbed the spear. His blind eyes couldn't see the serpent, but the creature was hardly silent.

  "Duck," Balder called as he swung the stone again. Using all his might, he swung the stone so it pivoted around a column and struck Nidhogg from behind. It had been unexpected and Nidhogg floundered for a moment.

  Taking advantage of the moment of confusion, Balder grabbed the spear from Hoder and leapt. Bringing the point down through the creature's tail with as much force as he could. Crunching of flesh and bone before the spear buried its tip into the stone below.

  Nidhogg wailed, rearing up to turn back and strike. The spear held him in place and he couldn't reach it to free himself.

  As Nidhogg tried to reach for the spear, Balder swung the stone again, sending it around the creature's neck and the column behind him before Nidhogg even had a chance to excavate the spear. It was the needed distraction and Balder pulled the chain tight until Nidhogg was tied to the column, unable to move.

  The fight was over. Nidhogg was trussed up and as much as he squirmed, he couldn't move.

  "Not even Fenrir could break those chains," Balder said gloatingly. "You will certainly not."

  All Nidhogg could do was hiss.

  "Those were used to chain Fenrir?" Hoder asked. "Then where is the beast?"

  "Fenrir's dead," Balder said, tearing the spear out of Nidhogg's tail. The creature wailed again. "During Ragnarok. Vidar killed him." It dawned on him that Hoder knew nothing of this.

  Hoder was silent. He would know full well what Ragnarok signifies. "Who survived?"

  "Vali."

  "Vali," Hoder repeated bitterly. Perhaps Hoder wasn't as fond of the person causing his demise as Balder was.

  "He is your brother," Balder said quietly. Even if Vali had refused to participate in this rescue quest.

  "Then there is you and me. Nanna. We were both in Helheim throughout, and since. We were recently released. And Hel," he added quietly. "There is someone else too, we suspect, but they haven't revealed themselves."

  "So everyone is gone," Hoder said. There was aching pain in the statement. Perhaps he had hoped all his family would be up in Asgard, living their lives. Maybe it had given him strength to think so.

  "Come, we must go," Balder said, taking a last look at Nidhogg to see that he was securely tied. Well, he had managed not to kill the creature. Hel would be pleased. But now he was chained and would be so until released. These chains could not be broken.

  If only Nidhogg had been cooperative, this would not have happened, but it was perhaps unreasonable to expect a creature like Nidhogg would ever be cooperative. In fact, Balder wanted to tear the hall down. It wasn't his place to, though.

  “What should we do with the others?” Balder asked. “The humans.”

  “We cannot help them,” Hoder croaked. “You cannot get them through the door. The magic forbids it, and it’s very old magic.”

  Selfishly, he was glad, because he didn’t want to spend a moment longer here.

  Chapter 27

  BALDER MOVED TOWARD the doorway, but Hoder didn't move. The squirming of Nidhogg took his attention for a moment, but the serpent didn't break free. "It's time to leave, brother," he said.

  A wan smile spread across Hoder's wrinkled face. "I am touched you came all this way. Is everything really gone?" The pain was clear in his voice.

  "Yes. All of Asgard is but a charred remains. We live in Midgard now."

  "Vali will not accept me."

  "Then he will not be welcome in my hall. Our hall, if you wish. Nanna will not forgive me and Vali will not forgive you. We are similar in these things. But we will build a place and I will find you some of Idunn's apples and make you young and strong again."

  "I do miss my youth. You cannot imagine how much."

  There was probably a lot of things Hoder missed, having to liv
e here for so long.

  In truth, Balder was eager to leave and he didn't quite understand why Hoder wasn’t running out the door. Perhaps he was afraid to leave. This had been all he had known for a very long time. "Come," he said, aching to be away from this putrid air.

  But as Hoder moved to the doorway, he couldn't move through. By the look on his face, he didn't seem surprised. He'd been expecting that he couldn't move through.

  "Come through," Balder said, holding his hand out.

  "I cannot. It is not as simple as just leaving. It never was."

  A deep frown crossed Balder's brow. "There is a trick."

  "Not so much a trick, but the only way out of this hall is forgiveness."

  "But you have mine, brother. I have forgiven you for what you did. In fact, I never blamed you."

  Hoder only stood there, his white beard stretching all the way down his front. It was strange seeing his twin brother this old. The appearance made him seem like a wise man.

  "Only someone with forgiveness in their heart can claim from this hall. This is the hall of the unforgiven."

  "Is it your forgiveness that is lacking?" Balder asked and Hoder seemed to consider it, looking deep in thought.

  "No, I don't think so. It is you that matters. You are the challenger and you must have a clear heart and clear conscience. Who is it you cannot forgive?"

  A sinking feeling clenched Balder's heart. There was someone he had not forgiven—he didn't want to forgive. "That has nothing to do with you."

  "It does not matter." There was silence between them for a moment. "If you cannot forgive this person, then you must leave me here."

  "I will not," Balder said sharply.

  Putting the point of his spear on the ground, Balder leaned on it. Ever since he had awakened, he had been holding onto his anger at Hel for what she'd done, for what he'd done to Nanna—for what he'd turned into. It felt a little like he needed that anger—needed it to accept his own role in things.

  "Who is it you cannot forgive?" Hoder asked.

  Balder bit his lips together for a moment. He didn't even want to talk about it. There was something he feared about admitting it. "Hel," he finally said.