Bride of Second Chances

by Nordin, Ruth Ann

  He blinked, willing his own tears away. What could he say? She was smiling and crying at the same time, and as much as he wanted to express his disgust at what her uncle did to her, he knew it wasn’t the response she needed.

  “There’s something you should understand when you came to my door a week ago,” she continued. “For a moment, I thought you were my uncle. At first glance, you looked just like him, but as I studied your face more, I saw myself in you, too. That’s why it took me awhile to overcome my shock. I never imagined the Grahams would tell you about me, and for sure, I didn’t think you would care enough to find me, especially given the fact that I used to be a prostitute.”

  “There are many things I’ve learned over my years in the ministry, and one of them is that too many people judge a person based on where they’ve been instead of where they are now. You were too young to make a decision when you became a prostitute, but you gathered the courage to leave and that’s what counts.”

  She wiped her eyes again. “Those are beautiful words.”

  “I’m sorry you had to go through that with…” He couldn’t bring himself to say his father because as far as he was concerned, her uncle didn’t have a right to that title, so he finished with, “him. No one deserves that. You don’t have to worry about me. I’m proud to be your son.”

  She burst into tears and got up so she could hug him. “Thank you.”

  He returned her hug and forced his voice to remain steady. “Thank you, Ma.” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “Thank you for letting the Grahams raise me so I could have a good life.”

  After a few moments, she went to the cook stove and put the teapot back on the range. “Is there anything else you want to know?”

  “No, you’ve answered all of my questions.” Standing up, he added, “I’ll get Jane and come back.”

  Smiling, she nodded.

  Returning her smile, he left the house.

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Jane watched as Charlotte bent by the creek to roll up a small ball of snow. Charlotte threw it into the water and giggled as the snow melted before she ran to find more snow.

  “She certainly doesn’t get bored out here, does she?” Jane commented, amused by the girl’s enthusiasm.

  “No, she doesn’t,” Lucy replied, tucking her hands into her coat pockets. “That’s the last snowball you can throw into the creek, Charlotte. We need to get back to the house. It’s not that warm out yet.” With a slight shiver, she turned to Jane. “You’d think by now I would have adjusted to the winters here.”

  “It’s colder out today than it was yesterday,” Jane said.

  “Maybe that’s it. We did have a couple of warmer days for a while there. My body must have thought it was time for spring.”

  “Toward the end of winter, I tend to get restless for the warmer weather.”

  “I appreciate the warm weather much more because of winters.”

  Jane nodded her agreement. “I remember being glad for the warm weather because it gave my niece and nephew a chance to play outside. They didn’t fidget so much inside then.”

  “Yes, that’s true.” After a moment of silence, she continued, “I’ll miss you when you leave. It’s hard to believe it’s already been a week since you and Jeremy came here. The time’s flown by.”

  “I’ll miss you, too, but maybe Jeremy’s request to serve in the church here will be granted.”

  “You’ll write and keep me posted on what’s happening, won’t you?” Lucy asked.

  “I’ll send you word as soon as I find out either way.”

  “I know I said it before, but I hope you can move here. Our children can grow up and play together.”

  Jane chuckled. “I have a feeling if they did, Charlotte would be the one to lead the others.”

  Lucy smiled as she waved for Charlotte to throw her snowball into the creek. “I’m afraid you’re right. She’ll be the oldest. Leading the others can’t be helped.”

  Charlotte threw the snow and ran over to them. “Can we eat?”

  “I’ll make something when we get back.” Lucy took Charlotte’s hand and they headed back toward the house. Looking at Jane, she asked, “Are you looking forward to being a mother?”

  Jane stepped over tree roots. “I am. I didn’t think I would have children when I married Jeremy. He was in love with my sister. I don’t believe a woman was better loved.”

  “He loves you, Jane. It’s obvious when you two are together.”

  “Well yes, he does love me, and I’ve been fortunate for that.”

  “But…?”

  “Rebecca was his first love. I came after her.”

  “Granted, I haven’t seen him with Rebecca, so it’s hard to make a comparison, but he adores you. You don’t have to be your sister. You’re special because you’re you.”

  “You didn’t know Rebecca and how people responded to her. Everyone liked her more than they liked me. I’m not complaining, Lucy. I was happy for her. She was one of the kindest people to me. I’m just glad Jeremy’s opened his heart to me.”

  “He’s done more than open his heart to you. He’s given it to you.” Smiling, Lucy tucked her free arm around Jane’s. “I know it’s easier to see things when you’re the observer. I know that the people in Lincoln held Rebecca in high esteem, and I remember what you said about Marcy when you overheard her talking to a friend.”

  “And Rebecca and Marcy were close friends.”

  “And you and I are close friends, are we not? I know we’ve only known each other for a week, but I enjoy your friendship immensely. While I was growing up, I’d hoped that Meredith and I might one day get over the difficulties I told you about.”

  “Yes,” Jane whispered, recalling all that Lucy’s sister had done before her untimely death. Hearing about Meredith’s betrayal made Jane that much more grateful for Rebecca. “I’m sorry about Meredith. I can’t imagine anyone being so hateful.” Even Marcy wouldn’t go that far. The worst she did was talk badly about people behind their backs.

  “It’s all in the past,” Lucy replied.

  “Does it ever bother you?”

  “Sometimes, but it gets less and less as time goes on.”

  Jane’s gaze went up ahead to Lucy’s house as it came into view, and her eyebrows furrowed when she noticed Jeremy sitting on the porch by the kitchen door. It was hard to tell what he was thinking from the distance between them, but she wondered if the talk he had with Eliza went well or not. She thought he would be gone longer than the short time she’d been with Lucy.

  “Carry me,” Charlotte told Lucy.

  Lucy let go of Jane and picked her daughter up. “I think you’ll be ready for a nap after you eat.”

  “No.” Though Charlotte protested, she yawned.

  Lucy shot Jane a knowing look, and Jane chuckled.

  When they reached the porch, Jane saw that Jeremy was smiling, so she surmised the talk was a good one.

  “Would you like to come in?” Lucy asked Jeremy as she stepped up the porch steps.

  “No, thank you. I’d like to speak to Jane and go back to my mother’s, if that’s alright?” He looked at Jane.

  Jane nodded her consent and remained at the bottom of the porch steps.

  “In that case, I’ll see you both after Charlotte gets up from her nap,” Lucy said as she carried the still-yawning girl into the house.

  Once Lucy shut the door, Jeremy bounded down the steps, and Jane returned his smile. “I take it the talk went well.”

  “It did. It wasn’t what I expected, but I appreciate everything she went through a lot more. You know, some people let small things prevent them from enjoying life, but even after all she’s been through, she finds a reason to be thankful for what she has. I don’t see that enough in my line of work.”

  “That’s good. Then all that worrying you did was for nothing.”

  He chuckled. “You were right.” He took her hand and squeezed it. “What’s behind those trees?”

/>   “The creek that runs along the property.”

  “Would you like to show it to me?”

  “Sure. As long as we keep walking, it won’t get too cold.”

  She led the way down the path she’d just walked with Lucy and Charlotte. She debated whether or not to ask him about his talk with Eliza. It wasn’t her business to intrude on a private moment between a mother and son, but he’d been open with all of his thoughts even before they were married so it felt natural to share everything with him. They reached the creek and he stopped walking, so she halted her steps.

  “Jane, you’re the only one I’d trust with what I learned, and that goes for anyone I’ve ever known, even my parents who raised me.”

  “What about…?” She hesitated to continue.

  “Rebecca?” he filled in for her.

  With a shrug, she said, “It seems logical that you would share everything with her.”

  “I would have told her I was adopted, but I don’t think I would have told her anything else.”

  Surprised, she turned her gaze from the creek so she could study his face.

  “I can’t explain it. I loved her. You know that, but I always felt I could talk to you about anything. Back then, it wasn’t a romantic inclination, and if she was still alive, I wouldn’t tell you that my mother was a prostitute. I would have kept it to myself, and I wouldn’t have searched for her. I would have kept it in the past.”

  “I don’t understand, Jeremy. Rebecca would have understood if you told her.”

  “I’m not sure. Maybe she would have or maybe not. She was good friends with Marcy. The two were more alike than she and you were. You were her sister and I know you two were close, but she was a little closer to Marcy.”

  Jane couldn’t argue that observation. While Rebecca brought Jane to Marcy’s on occasion and included her in the conversation, more often than not, she told Marcy things she never told Jane. But to be fair, Jane had disclosed things to Edith she didn’t disclose to Rebecca, though she could only recall two things Edith knew that Rebecca didn’t. One was her secret envy of Rebecca because Rebecca got along with everyone she met. The other was how upset she’d been growing up because her parents favored Rebecca.

  He squeezed Jane’s hand. “You know how Marcy is. Do you think Rebecca would have withheld anything from her?”

  She sighed. “No, I don’t.”

  “And what do you think Marcy would think of me being born out of wedlock because my mother was a prostitute?”

  “She wouldn’t have liked it, but surely, Rebecca would have known this was one thing she couldn’t tell Marcy.”

  “I don’t know, and the uncertainty would have held me back.”

  “But it bothered you when you found out.” She recalled how he’d been during the sermon after he came back from his father’s funeral and how troubled he’d been at the potluck. “I don’t think keeping it to yourself would have been good for you.”

  “Looking back, I agree. Jane, I know Marcy held high standards on what a person should be, especially a preacher, and sometimes I wonder if that’s part of what Rebecca liked about me.” He let go of her hand and sat on a log. “I wasn’t the only one who wanted to court her.”

  She sat next to him. “I know.” Will and her mother tried to talk a couple of disappointed suitors into courting Jane, but none were interested. Her cheeks warmed. The whole thing had been embarrassing. Not only did Will and her mother try to secure a husband for her, but the men refused to even consider her worth a second glance.

  “Marcy once made a comment that Rebecca couldn’t do better than a man of God,” he continued.

  “That’s not why Rebecca married you. She loved you.”

  “I know. I don’t doubt that. I just think that, unlike Rebecca, I can tell you everything without fear that I’ll disappoint you or you’ll tell the wrong person. Some people judge others by circumstances they can’t control. I know that you won’t think less of me because of my father.”

  “Your father?”

  “Yes. He wasn’t one of my mother’s customers like we thought.” He drew her closer to him and she settled in his arms. “He was my mother’s uncle.”

  “What?”

  “After her parents died, she went to live with her aunt and uncle. Without going into detail, her uncle took advantage of the situation, and when she got in the family way, he sold her into prostitution.”

  “That’s horrible, Jeremy.”

  “Yes, it is, and it wasn’t easy for my mother to tell me about it. Even now, I can see that part of her past brings her pain. She did the best she could with what happened to her and made sure I had good people to raise me as their son.”

  “She’s a good woman.”

  “Yes, she is. Thank you for bringing me here to meet her.”

  She let out a soft chuckle. “All I did was suggest it. You decided to find her.”

  “Because I had your support. I never would have made it this far if it hadn’t been for you. You’re the better part of me.” He gave her a kiss and smiled. “I love you, Jane.”

  She returned his smile. “I love you, too.”

  After he stood, he helped her to her feet and took in their surroundings. “This is a nice spot. I can see why Lucy and Brian like to come here.”

  “There’s a sense of peace in listening to the water,” she replied, her head still spinning from what she just learned. It would take time to absorb everything. “So, are all your questions answered?”

  Looking back at her, he brought his arm around her shoulders and led her away from the creek. “Yes, they are.”

  “Good. I’m glad.”

  “The decision is up to the Lord, of course, but I hope I get to pastor the church in this town.”

  “I hope so, too.”

  “You know, if you have your mind set to it, I’d say that us moving here is a sure thing.”

  She laughed. “Then I suppose I should set my mind to it.”

  Chuckling, he squeezed her shoulders and gave her a kiss on the cheek before they continued down the path to Eliza and John’s house.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  In May, Jeremy received word that he could pastor the church in South Dakota. He knew that Jane would be excited, so he left the post office in a hurry. When he got home, he called out her name, but she wasn’t there. Despite his disappointment, he set the letter on the table in the entryway to show her when she came home. Since he had nothing else to do at the moment, he decided to get a head start on packing. He knew he didn’t have to, but he was too excited to sit still.

  He went to the bedroom to sort through the closet for anything he could pack right away and found the small box with the remaining items that had belonged to Rebecca. Funny how he forgot the box was there. He considered it was a sign that he healed and moved on, but as he opened it to examine the contents, he felt the lingering sense of love he’d had for her. He did still love her; he always would. But the love he had for Jane wasn’t diminished because of it. In some ways, he appreciated Jane a lot more because he was aware of how fragile life could be.

  He took the box with him and sat on the bed. Fingering Rebecca’s wedding ring, he recalled the day they got married and smiled. She’d been a lovely bride, and she gave him good memories. Putting her wedding ring aside, he took out the necklace and put it on the nightstand beside the bed. Perhaps Jane might like the necklace. He couldn’t think of a single reason why Rebecca wouldn’t want Jane to have it.

  His gaze fell on the fountain pen and leather-bound journal. Maybe he could look through the journal. He’d been unable to do it after her death because all it did was serve to bring back unwanted memories. But since he could now sort through her things with a sense of gratefulness for the time he’d had with her, he might be able to read her entries.

  He took the book out and thumbed through the pages. He remembered when she read the entries to him and how excited she’d been. She embraced life. Waiting for life to happen was
n’t for her, something which showed up in her entries. He wasn’t under the impression she was perfect, but she was a lovely woman. Almost as lovely as Jane.

  He set down the journal for a moment and wondered if he was wrong for thinking that Jane was lovelier. Because when he thought about it, Jane was. She didn’t stand out in the crowd, but she had a gentle and sweet spirit that made her a friend he could depend on no matter what happened. He’d always felt a friendship to her, but until they married, he hadn’t looked at her as a woman who was desirable to touch and love.

  With Rebecca, the attraction was immediate, and he did love her. With Jane, love came softly; he wasn’t even aware it was happening. And in some ways, that made Jane lovelier. He wasn’t sure if Rebecca would be content knowing he fell in love with her sister, but then he figured she was happy where she was at and that’s what mattered.

  Returning his attention to the journal, he read more entries and caught himself laughing at some of them. He would keep the journal. He liked remembering Rebecca, and his and Jane’s child might one day be interested in knowing what his or her aunt was like.

  As he came to the last entry, his smile faltered. She wrote of congestion in her chest and how much she coughed, but she was determined to keep her spirits up, figuring it was a simple illness that would soon pass. But she wouldn’t recover, and even as he sat there, reading what she planned to do once she got well, a tear slid down his cheek.

  As he put the journal on his lap so he could wipe his eyes, a piece of paper fell out of it. Curious, he got off the bed and picked the folded paper up. He set the journal down and opened the paper, realizing it was a letter Rebecca had written to him three days before her death. He had no idea she wrote it. She must have intended for him to find it. The journal had been on the nightstand beside her, but he didn’t think she had the strength to write anything. Even if he knew she wrote the letter, he might not have read it when the wounds were too new, too fresh.