Breaking Hearts (B-boy #3)

by S. Briones Lim

  I couldn’t say I regretted our night together even if I tried, yet I couldn’t deny how different and easy my life would have been had I not decided to end my self-imposed celibacy that night.

  Why the celibacy?

  Well, after Roxie had dumped me, I had sworn all women were the devil, but something about Mallory changed my mind…

  But what?

  Lost so deep in my thoughts, I didn’t even notice when I’d turned onto my street and was just a few houses away from my destination. As I neared the paint-chipped front porch, I heard the telltale sounds of laughter and music coming from inside. Judging by the rows of cars double parked on the narrow street, Grom Attack was probably holding an impromptu practice session inside the garage.

  “Fuck.” I kicked at a pebble and threw my head back, staring at the power lines that bordered the dirty street. A lonesome pair of red Chuck Taylors hanging by its shoelaces stared back at me. If only I could fly away, I’d join them. “I am not going inside. I can’t go in there…so where do I go?”

  My gaze dropped from the power lines that seemed to hum with an electrical feed, almost taunting and laughing at me. I looked around the empty road, listening to the distant barks of dogs.

  “That’s it!” I gasped, eyeing the rusted metal a few feet away.

  As bad decisions went, I decided to hop our chain link fence leading to the backyard. My room was toward the back of the house, and I was pretty sure I could shimmy the old window lock easily. Driven by a desperation to hide, I propped a foot onto the fence, shimmying my worn sneakers inside one of the spaces between the links. The metallic fence sagged underneath me; flaking pieces of old rust to the ground. I flinched upon hearing the fence squeak and groan under my weight and prayed the neighbors wouldn’t choose that moment to look out their windows and decide to call the cops. That’d be all I needed—two infractions in a week’s time. Luckily, years of dance training allowed me to quickly hop over, giving me ample time to run toward my window, which I had surprisingly left wide open.

  “Thank God,” I whispered, eyeing the pale blue curtains peeking out from the open space.

  Without a moment’s hesitation I dove inside the window, forgetting that my desk was positioned right underneath it.

  Crash.

  The top half of my body cleared the old wooden table easily, but my lower half was caught up and hung over the edge. A sharp hot pain ran up the side of my leg and I could do nothing but helplessly watch all my stuff tumble to the floor.

  “So much for being inconspicuous,” I muttered, cursing myself to oblivion.

  Within a second Gerald came running through my door. “What the fuck are you doing, man? You almost scared the shit out of me!” he exclaimed in that angry tone only someone who was terrified would use.

  Like a snake, I slowly slithered off the desk until I was in a heap on the floor. Not even bothering to rise, I mumbled, “I was trying to hide.”

  “Why?” he demanded, glancing over his shoulder. I flinched, waiting for another member of our crew to come running up to us. What could be more awesome than adding more fuel to throw onto my embarrassment fire, after all? Fortunately, nobody came.

  “I just didn’t want to practice with you,” I admitted.

  I knew I was trying Gerald’s patience. Hell, I knew I’d used all of it up almost a month ago. Still, nothing could prepare me for the look of utter exasperation on his face.

  “Are you serious, man?” he spat out as if tasting something bitter. “This is about that stupid jinx, isn’t it? Are you giving up on b-boying now? What about your gig? Don’t you need to practice?”

  “I’m not giving up. In fact, I’m working on something that’s gonna make it all better.” Damn, my excuses were pathetic.

  He shot me a doubtful look. “I’m not even gonna ask what exactly you’re working on.”

  “Good.”

  “Because if it’s that stupid superstition shit, I don’t care.”

  I pulled my lips inward and blew them out with a pop. “It’s not…really.”

  Gerald was not having it. He gave me a curt nod and began to push away from the door jam. “Get your head on straight, man. This shit’s not gonna fly anymore. Hate to say it, but Grom Attack is getting tired of your bullshit, and in truth, I am too.”

  Always the happy-go-lucky type, I’d never heard Gerald speak so seriously and so angrily before—especially not against me.

  “What are you saying, man?” I asked cautiously.

  He pushed his bottom teeth out, biting against his upper lip. “Just…just get over it, Hellhound. You’re acting really Hollywood right now, if you get my drift.”

  Now that caused me to jump to my feet. “What the fuck did you say to me?”

  My steps were calculated. Like a leopard stalking its prey, one foot slowly slunk in front of the other. Gerald was not about to back down.

  He walked back into my room and lifted his chin so far up he had to gaze down his nose to eye me. “I put my ass on the line to get you into Grom Attack because they all thought you were some pretty boy celebrity too.”

  I definitely did not know that. Chagrined, I tried my best to keep a stone cold face.

  “Do you even know what crap I’ve been through defending your ass? No. Because you’re out with that jinx of yours trying to get into her pants!”

  “You’re really going to bring Mallory into this?” By this point we were nearly chest to chest, and though a small voice in the back of my head was warning me to stop everything before it blew up, I couldn’t bring myself to just walk away. Best childhood friend or not, I just couldn’t take any more of the shit hand I was dealt. If Gerald just happened to be my punching bag, so be it.

  “Step off, Gerald,” I warned him.

  “When have I ever been one to run away and hide? I’m not you.”

  As I flinched in response, he put the last nail in the coffin, guaranteeing the fight. He shoved me away—hard.

  Little did he know, I would not be running away this time around. I was absolutely through running.

  So, I punched him in the face.

  In a blink of an eye we were on the floor, exchanging punches and blows.

  I felt a warm, but also cooling sensation trickle down the side of my face.

  Pow.

  My knuckles hit into Gerald’s mouth, leaving his teeth a crimson red.

  Pow.

  Gerald punched up toward my nose, causing it to drip blood like a faucet.

  “Whoa! What the fuck are you guys doing? Get off each other!” Mahone rushed in, prying me off Gerald. The rest of Grom Attack soon followed, stepping in between us. Before I knew it, I stood alone, staring at a wall of guys who looked ready to beat me up.

  They had no loyalty to me. Their brother was Gerald, and I was just the troublemaker foster kid.

  Gerald wiped his mouth, flicking the blood away, whereas I allowed mine to flow. I wouldn’t show them any more weakness. They’d already seen me at my worst, but I was sure as hell not going to let them see me completely at rock bottom.

  “Get out of my house,” Gerald said in a freakishly calm voice.

  I didn’t respond, though I didn’t think he’d want me to. Quietly, I turned to my closet and grabbed an empty suitcase.

  Chapter 27

  Mallory

  “No, no, no!” I rubbed my eyes, willing myself to stay awake. It was nearing one in the morning and I’d been pouring over my composition since I’d gotten home that night. Not bothering to eat and now sleep, I needed to get this piece to the point I’d feel comfortable playing for Damien.

  It wasn’t there yet.

  I lifted my foot from the middle pedal, which softened each note, and glanced around my apartment. Claudia was asleep in her room, no doubt wearing the noise cancelling headphones she’d splurged on once she moved in with me. Judging by the dim light in Jinny’s room, she and Raphael were most likely awake in hers, probably going at round three in the makeup sex Olympics.
r />   I stared at their closed door enviously. Their lives were calm and mine just seemed like such a mess.

  Knock. Knock.

  I blinked, certain I was imagining things. I glanced at the clock once again just to make sure it was indeed a.m. and not p.m., because at the rate I was going, who knew what day it was anymore?

  Knock. Knock.

  “Okay, that was definitely someone at the door,” I whispered to myself. My heart beat wildly in my chest, thrashing so hard I was sure it’d fly out of my chest and splatter onto the floor.

  Nothing good ever comes from someone knocking at your door in the wee hours of the morning. I glanced back at Jinny’s room, wondering if I should call Raphael, but decided against it, knowing I’d probably walk into something that’d make me want to gouge my eyes out.

  You can do this. You’re a strong, independent woman who goes against archaic practices. Just open the door.

  Did I really want to?

  “Mallory, are you awake?” I heard Asher call out from outside the door.

  “What the hell?” Though I was still pretty mad at him for throwing me under the bus earlier, I couldn’t help but feel a surge of excitement knowing he had come to see me.

  I hated myself for it.

  It’s okay. You’re just happy that it’s not some deranged axe murderer at your door. Yeah, that was it.

  I ran to the door, holding my breath. My fingers moved nimbly, unlocking the three deadbolts that Jinny had insisted we install the first day we moved off campus. Once the final clasp was opened, I pulled the door and gasped in shock when I found Asher’s bruised, swollen face looking back at me.

  “What happened?” As I scanned what looked like tender skin around his mouth and the laceration that cut across his right eyebrow, I couldn’t help but feel nauseated. Instinctively, I reached out to touch his lip but immediately pulled back when I noticed him flinch. I stepped away from the door, ushering him inside. “Come in. Come in. Let’s get you cleaned up.”

  Once Asher was settled on my couch, he began to tell me the story of how he and Gerald had come to fisticuffs. With a damp towel, I wiped against his injuries softly, listening quietly as he went into full detail.

  “And they just stared at me. Like the whole crew looked at me as if I were a piece of dried dog shit.”

  “Oh, come on. Not everyone can be that mean,” I said, trying to cheer him up.

  His answering expression told me that it did not help. “He kicked me out, Mallory. My best friend kicked me out…” His voice trailed off. He looked pained, but I wasn’t sure if it was from his physical bruises or emotional ones. “Ow!”

  “Sorry!” I pulled back the wet cloth and placed the blue dish towel back into the basin full of warm water at my feet. Settling back to next to him, I took a sharp intake of breath and let it out slowly. “I just don’t get how things escalated so quickly.”

  “Will Ferrell would have been proud.”

  “What?”

  “You know that internet meme? Never mind.” He scanned my dog-printed pajamas and smirked. “Cute PJ’s by the way.”

  “Thanks, I consider them haute couture.”

  “I’m not even going to pretend like I know what that means,” he replied with a wink.

  I felt relieved to see how his mood shifted for the better, even by a little bit. Trying to ride out that wave, I teased, “What made you think it was okay for you to come here?” As soon as the words came out of my mouth I instantly cringed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it to come out like that. I just meant why did you think of me first?”

  “No, no, no. You had it right the first time.” He shut his eyes and sighed. “If I were being honest…”

  “I rather you be truthful,” I agreed.

  “I guess you’re the only one I felt comfortable enough seeing me like this.”

  “If you can’t handle my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best?” I offered, sharing one of my favorite quotes.

  He laughed. “Something like that.”

  “What about your parents? Are they anywhere nearby?”

  He shook his head. “Early retirement in Florida, but I never liked that place. I consider San Diego my home. Especially since my best friend lived down here.”

  Gerald was his best friend.

  “Oh.” Well, that was a foot in the mouth.

  “What about you?”

  “Me?” I asked in surprise. “Not ready for retirement yet, that’s for sure.”

  He chuckled softly. “Where are you from? I just realized I never asked. Bad friend I am, huh?”

  I couldn’t help but smile. “So we’re friends after all?”

  “A bit presumptuous of me to assume, right? Especially after what I put you through today.” There had to be an apology in there somewhere. I’d fish it out if I needed to.

  I shrugged. “Given that your first instinct was to come straight here, then yes. I’d say we are friends.”

  Only friends, unfortunately.

  “Good.” He nodded with a smile.

  “To answer your question, I’m from Seattle.”

  “Seattle? Really?”

  I nodded. “Born in Minnesota, but moved to Seattle when I was three. It’s definitely my hometown.”

  “Three, huh? Too bad.”

  “Why is that?”

  “I love Midwestern accents. Woulda preferred if you grew up in Minnesota.”

  Laughing, I eyed his luggage, which was set in a haphazard pile by the door. I gulped, imagining Asher sleeping in my room that night with me right beside him. We could have a do over of the night I snuck out of his hotel room.

  As if reading my mind, Asher said, “I can sleep on the couch. It’s no biggie.”

  Despite being ostentatiously large, our velvet upholstered couch had lost all support. It’d be hell for someone to spend the night on the sagging cushions. Especially a dancer.

  “That’s gotta be uncomfortable.” I let an awkward laugh. “I have an air mattress stashed away in my closet for cases just like this. It’d be no more problem for you to sleep on that instead.”

  “Cases like this? You mean when a random guy shows up at your doorstep looking for a place to crash?” he joked.

  “Yeah, exactly. I’m a regular bed and breakfast up in here.” Out of nowhere a yawn escaped my mouth before I could cover it. Cheeks warming, I smiled sheepishly. “Oh, sorry. That was rude.”

  “Looks like you’re tired.”

  “Yeah…” My voice trailed off as I anxiously eyed my room. “Well, let’s go. We’ve both had pretty rough days. Pretty sure we’re both ready to turn in for the night.”

  “Yeah…” he repeated, sounding distant.

  Chapter 28

  Asher and I waited quietly, watching the air mattress inflate using one of those obnoxiously loud air pumps. I prayed that Claudia was still wearing her headphones and that the lovers were still busy going at it in pound town. It seriously sounded as if two elephants were fighting in my room.

  Once the mattress looked usable, Asher slowly walked over and pressed his socked foot against it, allowing the plastic covering to dip under his toes. “Uh, I guess it’s bed time.”

  Damn him and his bashful head rubbing.

  I swallowed and let out a strained giggle. My earlier sleepiness was now long gone with the promise of being so close to Asher once again. Trying my hardest to remain composed, I cleared my throat and smiled. “I can move the mattress into the living room if you feel more comfortable. The extra bathroom is by the coat closet outside.”

  “Who has the master bedroom?”

  “Claudia.” I shrugged. “She pays more rent.”

  I refrained from telling him that I had the smallest room out of the bunch, given I could hardly afford to eat anything other than microwaveable noodles during the school year.

  “Oh.” He scratched his forehead and glanced at me with a shy look on his face.

  I felt my lip twitch. “What is it?”

  “I
s it okay if I sleep in here? After what happened with Gerald…I just don’t want to be alone with my thoughts, you know?”

  I knew exactly what he meant.

  He gulped and slyly added, “I promise I’ll be a gentleman.”

  Wonder Dick.

  I bit back a smile, recalling my very first conversation with the girls about him. There was certainly no questioning whether he was a dick or not, though sometimes he rode that fine line pretty well. In fact, I almost wanted to tell him that I rather him not be one, but forced myself to smile and nod politely.

  “That’s fine…maybe we can even discuss how you plan to train me, sensei. Unless you’re really tired or something…”

  “Actually, that sounds like a good idea.” He bent down to reach for his suitcase, allowing his baggy shirt to ride up his back. I gulped, scanning the outline of his muscles that ebbed and flowed as he dug into his bag. He stood up and I quickly averted my eyes, feeling my cheeks warm once again. “I’ll change in the bathroom, I guess.”

  “Yes, you go do that,” I answered, doing my best to hide my cheeks. Fuck my tell. I’d be the worst poker player ever.

  Once he left the room, I reached out and slowly shut off my bedside lamp with trembling fingers.

  What is the matter with you, Mallory? Just stop acting like such a nitwit. I sighed, falling back onto the mattress. Its springs groaned under my weight, a stark contrast from the bed at the hotel, reminding me even more that the last time I spent the night with Asher things were a heck of a lot different.

  I rolled over to my side and eyed the door, staring at the dim glow of the living room light shining underneath it. I listened to the thumps coming out of the bathroom and wondered if he was going to pull a move or if I had indeed fallen down that dreaded Bermuda Triangle called the Friend Zone.

  “Or the jinx zone,” I muttered.

  The doorknob shook, signaling my cue to jump under the covers. Feeling like a stranger in my own home, I struggled to get comfortable as Asher walked in looking equally as awkward. Without speaking, he threw his dirty clothes into a heap by the door. His belt buckle rattled, a further reminder that Asher had indeed changed into his sleepwear, ready to spend the night.