Healed by the Midwife's Kiss

by Fiona McArthur

  Sam was leaving; he’d go too, as soon as he’d spoken to the parents, explained what had happened, that baby had been fine by five-minute Apgar and he didn’t expect any sequelae. Then he’d go, but he cast one glance at Catrina. She was busy. Too busy for his drama. It would have to wait. He just hoped he got to her before she found out.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR

  Trina

  TRINA SAW FINN leave the room after he’d spoken to the parents. Good. She didn’t have the head space. He’d come to help when he’d been needed. And gone as well. She’d needed him to go.

  She didn’t think Finn had known his sister would bring his wife. She wasn’t that blindly jealous. She even still had faith that he’d come eventually to explain and thanked him mentally for not attempting that now in the midst of the birthing centre drama. But then again, he didn’t know that she had seen his visitor. Guest. Whatever.

  Her heart cracked a little more and she forced a smile onto her face. ‘Let’s get you into the shower, Jemma. Then into bed with your little man for a well-earned rest.’

  Jemma had physically fared well. Apart from some grazes, she hadn’t needed stitches, her bleeding had been normal not excessive, which could happen after a shoulder dystocia, and her baby had recovered to the stage where he’d fed very calmly, had excellent blood sugar readings and gone to sleep in his father’s arms after an hour on his mother’s skin.

  Finn had explained everything very slowly and calmly and both Jemma and Pierce seemed to have come to an understanding of what had happened. And, without being told, what could have happened. They kept thanking everyone. It was after such a harrowing experience that things replayed in a mother’s mind—and a father’s. So it was very important the information was given and the chance to ask questions was given.

  Trina reassured her again. ‘It’s one of those things that we practice for. Do drills and prepare for because when it happens we need to have a plan.’ We also had two very experienced doctors available, Trina thought and thanked her lucky stars they hadn’t had a tragedy. For a minute she thought how good it would be to talk to Finn about what had happened, then remembered she couldn’t. Maybe never would be able to. Pain sliced through her and she hugged it to herself to stop the heartbreak showing on her face. He’d probably leave now and she’d never see him again.

  * * *

  Four hours later the second birthing mother had gone home with her baby and the morning midwife could take over the care of Jemma and baby. Trina could go home. Not that she wanted to but she wasn’t needed here now.

  She had time to think. Maybe that was for the best. But damned if she was going to regret the fact she had shown Finn she cared. A lot. And he’d cared about her. There was nothing sleazy in their making love last night. Not a lot of sense either. But mostly the fact they hadn’t waited showed a whole lot of bad timing.

  It would probably be better if she didn’t see him again.

  Except that when she got home he was leaning against her front door.

  Her heart rate thumped into overdrive and suddenly she felt like crying. She forced the words past the thickness in her throat, looking at a spot beyond his left shoulder. ‘I didn’t expect to see you here.’ Understatement of the year.

  ‘I asked the morning midwife to ring me when you left,’ he said. His voice came to her low and strained. ‘Clancy turned up.’

  ‘I know.’ When she glanced at his face she saw his shock. And, if she wasn’t mistaken, his distress that she had found out on her own. The thought brought some comfort. At least he cared about that.

  ‘When did you find out?’

  She sighed and shrugged. Pushed past him to open her door. ‘I saw your sister drive away. Saw a woman with the same hair as Piper go back inside with you. It wasn’t hard.’ She felt him come in behind her and didn’t know if she wanted that or not. Might as well get the whole embarrassing mistake out in the open. But in private. Her face heated a little and she hoped her hair hid it. She’d let it down when she left the ward, needing the screen of it blowing around her face. Even more now. ‘I was bringing breakfast.’

  His hand touched her shoulder, the barest skim of his fingers, as if he thought she might shy away from him. ‘I’m sorry, Catrina. I wouldn’t have had you find out like that.’

  What was the optimal way to find out your lover’s wife had moved back in? She turned to face him. Saw the sincerity in his face, the pain, and spared a moment to think about just how much his world had been turned upside down by the unexpected return of his wife into his house. If she was Superwoman she’d feel sorry for him. Couldn’t quite achieve that yet. ‘Where’s Piper?’

  His face twisted. ‘With her mother. Who has no idea what to do with her. Thinks she’s a doll to play with.’

  And that hurt too. And there was the crux of the matter. Trina had grown up without her mother and, even if Clancy was ditzy, like Finn had given her the impression she was, she was still Piper’s real mother. Trina would have given anything to have an imperfect mother over no mother. One who was her very own. There was no way she could go anywhere near taking Piper’s mother away from her or Piper away from the woman who’d given birth to her.

  She forced the words out. ‘I’m glad for Piper. Every little girl needs her mother.’

  He sighed. Pulled his fingers through his hair as if he wanted to yank it out. ‘Surprisingly, so am I. And yes, a little girl does need her mother. But don’t get me wrong. Or get Piper’s mother wrong. This is why I need to be here now. Tell you now. Clancy doesn’t want to be a full-time mother. She has that “deer in the headlights” look in her eyes. I can see that already and I can’t even stay here long in case she runs.’

  If he was worried about that, despite the fact she needed to hear this, he should go. ‘Should you even be here?’

  He sighed. ‘I phoned my sister. When the hospital rang earlier. She turned around and came straight back. She’s with them at the moment. But I had to come. I need to tell you three things.’

  She almost laughed. Tried not to let the bitterness out. The loss that she was only just holding back like the little boy with his finger in the dyke. The whole dam was going to swamp her soon and she didn’t think she could hold back the disaster from drowning her for much longer. Her voice cracked. ‘Only three?’

  He stepped closer. His voice softened. ‘They’re important. Because you are important to me. Just listen. That’s all I ask.’

  She nodded mutely. She could listen. Just don’t ask her to talk. She was totally unable to articulate the words through her closed throat.

  He lifted his chin. Stared into her eyes. And his voice rang very firm. ‘One, I’m sorry that you’ve been hurt by this.’

  Yes, she’d been hurt, but she knew it was partly her own fault for falling in love with a man she knew wasn’t free. She’d known right from the beginning and still she’d sailed along blithely, ignoring the impending disaster that had come just like she deserved.

  He put up a second finger. ‘Two. The good part of Clancy being here is that I can ask her for a divorce. Start all the paperwork that was impossible while she was missing. That is a huge thing for us. For you and me. And arranging when and how and the logistics of Clancy’s access to Piper so that she and Piper can find the bonds that work for them. To create a relationship that is wonderful for both of them too. Piper will have two mothers.’ He smiled like a man with a huge load lifted off his shoulders. ‘You and I and Piper can look to the future. But that’s where it is. In the future. It will take time and I may have to leave for a while as I sort it all out.’

  She nodded dumbly, her head spinning.

  He stroked her cheek. ‘When it’s sorted I will come back and ask you to be my wife properly. Romantically. Like you deserve and like I want too. Like I need to because you deserve everything to be perfect.’ He shrugged those wonderful shoulders ruefully. ‘
Perfection can take a little while, with me. I’m sorry you have to wait for that.’

  Trina sagged a little, relief bringing the dam closer to cracking. But the words swirled in her head, glimmers of light beginning to penetrate the weight of the wall hanging over her. He still wanted a future with her. Wanted her to be a part of the big picture. Part of his and Piper’s future. Was it too good to be true?

  ‘Three.’ He paused. Stepped closer to her and tipped her chin up with his finger ever so gently. Wiped the tears that she hadn’t realised were running down her face. ‘I love you, Catrina Thomas. Fell in love with you weeks ago. And it’s real love. Not the infatuation I had for Clancy. This is I-will-die-for-you love.’ He sucked in a deep breath as if preparing for battle. ‘We will conquer all the obstacles, my love.’ He pulled back to see her face. ‘Will you accept my apology and wait, dearest beautiful Catrina, while I sort this mess I made? Please.’

  Trina drew her breath in with a shudder, trying not to sob with the relief of it all. The incredible wonder of Finn declaring his love when she’d thought it all lost. The unbelievable reprieve from having to rebuild her shattered heart. She moistened dry lips with her tongue and whispered very, very softly, ‘Yes, Finn. I’ll wait.’

  His strong arms closed around her and she buried her face in his beautiful chest and sobbed while Finn leaned into her hair and whispered over and over again that he loved her so much.

  EPILOGUE

  A FULL YEAR later in a little pink cottage on the foreshore of Lighthouse Bay, Finlay Foley woke with anticipation and wonder at the change in his life. His two-year-old daughter, Piper, bounced in her cot. She’d thrown out all her toys and demanded to be allowed up to start this most special day.

  ‘Cat. Want Cat. Where’s Cat?’ She bounced and searched with her eyes. Finn had to smile as he picked her up and swung her through the air.

  ‘Try Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, baby. You can’t call your new mummy by her first name. And your other mummy wants to be called Clancy.’

  ‘Mum, Mum, Mum, Cat,’ Piper chanted and turned her head this way and that as if Catrina would appear from behind a chair in the tiny house.

  ‘She’s not here. It’s bad luck for Daddy to see his bride on the day of their wedding.’

  Her little face crumpled. ‘Want Cat. Now!’

  ‘I know, baby. Daddy wants her too. I can’t wait either. But the girls will be here soon to pick you up and take you to Cat. Then you can put on your pretty dress and watch your daddy become the happiest man in the world.’ He hugged the small body to him, feeling her warmth, and wondered again how he had been so blessed to have Piper and Catrina in his world.

  * * *

  The village church at Lighthouse Bay stood with the open arms of two white-columned verandas overlooking the sea. The slender throat of the small bell tower and the skirts of soft and springy green grass that surrounded it had begun to fill with milling guests who had arrived before the groom.

  The day shone clear and bright, freshly washed by an early morning shower as if the extra sparkle of purity was a gift from the sky to help celebrate their day.

  Finn drank in the serenity, the warmth of those who smiled at him as he crossed the iridescent grass with his best man, Sam, and the rightness of Catrina’s wish to sanctify their union in front of the townspeople and inside the church. He couldn’t wait.

  The journey of the last few months had taught him to look forward, and that something good—or, in this case, someone amazing—always came out of struggle. He’d learnt to accept that every day held promise, despite the ups and downs, and now his days with Catrina held an ocean of promise that he couldn’t wait to venture into.

  The minister moved determinedly to greet them as they reached the porch, his kind eyes and outstretched hand reassuring in appreciation of Finn’s nerves.

  But Finn’s nervousness had left—had departed the day Catrina said yes. Eagerness was more the word he was thinking of.

  Ten minutes later he was standing at the front of the wooden church in his morning suit, surrounded by smiling townspeople, with row upon row of well-wishers jammed into the little church. All fidgeting and excited and smiling with enthusiasm for the event about to begin. Finn was pretty certain that, despite their enthusiasm, no one was more impatient than he was.

  Sam by his side fidgeted too. Probably waiting to see Ellie. He saw Myra, looking particularly stylish in old lace, with Sam and Ellie’s one-year-old daughter, Emily, in her arms. He’d been there when Emily was born. Waited outside the birthing room door just in case, to allay Sam’s worries, and his own, and been a part of the joy and celebration of their beautiful birth. He couldn’t help thinking of that post-birth hour, how such a magic time was one he wanted to share with Catrina when their time came. And Sam would wait outside the door for them. He’d never seen or been a part of such a place that offered so much solid friendship as Lighthouse Bay. And it had all started with the woman who would walk through that door for him any moment now.

  The music soared and finally there was movement at the entrance. His eyes strained to see her. Catrina?

  Faith, one of the midwives and Catrina’s bridesmaid, appeared with his darling Piper in her arms, framed in the doorway. Faith and Piper’s deep frangipani pink dresses matched frangipanis in their hair, and Piper was wriggling to be put down. As soon as she was free she toddled swiftly towards him, drawing gasps of delight from the onlookers as she waved a pink sign on a thin stick that read, Here comes Mummy, Daddy.

  With Faith sedately bringing up the rear, Piper ran full pelt into his legs and he picked her up and hugged her. His throat was tight, his heart thumped, and then Sam’s wife Ellie appeared. He heard Sam’s appreciative sigh beside him but Finn was waiting, waiting... And then she was there.

  Catrina. His Catrina. Shining in the doorway. Resting her hand on Sam’s dad’s arm, her beautiful coffee-brown eyes looking straight at him with a world of promise and an ocean of love. Finn wanted her beside him now, but he also wanted everyone to see, admire her, as she stood there in her beautiful ivory gown—looking at him with such joy and wonder. Incredibly beautiful. Incredibly his.

  Faith reached across and took Piper from him, and everyone turned to savour the sight of the star, Catrina, his beautiful bride, as she stepped firmly towards him with so much happiness in her face he could feel his eyes sting with the emotion of the moment. How had he been so fortunate to win this woman’s love? He didn’t know if he deserved her but he would hold her and nurture her and protect their love and his darling wife for the rest of his life.

  * * *

  Catrina walked on a cloud towards Finn.

  Her husband-to-be. Tall, incredibly debonair and handsome in his formal suit, his ivory necktie crisp against his strong throat. Emotion swelled but she lifted her chin and savoured it. She loved Finn so much, had been blessed, finding him when she had never thought she could possibly feel this way again. The music swelled to draw her forward. She needed no coaxing, couldn’t wait, couldn’t smile enough, feel enough, be thankful enough as she walked towards the man gazing at her with so much love her feet barely touched the ground.

  ‘Cat, Cat, Dad,’ Piper said. Then she looked at her father. Frowned and then chortled. ‘Mum, Mum, Mumcat. Mumcat!’ she crowed, as if she’d found the perfect word.

  The congregation laughed as her parents touched hands and held on.

  * * *

  Much later, in the cavernous surf club hall, the best party Lighthouse Bay had seen for a year had begun winding down. They’d turned the sand-encrusted, silvered-by-the-sun clubhouse into a flower-filled bower of fragrant frangipanis and greenery. Tables and chairs and a small dais for the bride and groom all glowed under ropes of hanging lanterns and people milled and laughed and slapped Finn on the back as he stood surrounded by friends. Waiting.

  In a screened alcove at the back of the hall the midw
ives of Lighthouse Bay gathered to help the bride change from her beautiful ivory wedding gown into her travel clothes, a trousseau created by her friends. The laughter and smiles filled Catrina’s heart to bursting as she looked around and soaked in the affection and happiness that radiated from her friends. Her family.

  There was Ellie, with Emily on her hip, taking back the reins of the maternity ward full-time for only as long as Catrina and Finn were away. Then the two friends would share the duties, two mothers who had been blessed with a career they loved, and a workplace that could still leave plenty of time for family. It suited them both.

  Ellie held out the gorgeous floral skirt found by Myra that had once belonged to a French princess. It felt like a caress against her skin as she drew it on.

  Myra held the hand-embroidered cream blouse made by Faith’s aunt especially for the occasion, and Faith clapped her hands as she began to slide it on.

  She had two families now in her full life. In the main hall she had her new handsome and adoring husband, Finn, and her gorgeous Piper, soon to be her adopted daughter, and Finn’s sister Frances and her husband, and, of course, Clancy—her unexpected almost sister.

  Catrina had grown to care for flighty Clancy, saw that she had not a mean bone in her body, just a little foolishness and a wanderer’s heart, underscored by an adventurer’s gleam in her eye. Clancy would never be happy for too long in one place. But now, because of Piper and the growing relationship that made Catrina’s orphan’s heart swell with joy, Clancy could come and share family time with Piper, where she could have the best of both worlds without the responsibility that made her run. With Finn’s new family she had people who loved her and people who waved goodbye and let her go.

  Catrina noted that Faith, kind Faith, stood alone as she watched them all, watching her daughter chasing after a determined to escape Piper, a whimsical half-smile on her pretty face as she dreamed.

  Catrina took a moment to suggest to Finn’s mother’s angels that Faith should find her own second family and happiness, like she and Ellie had, in the very near future. Please!