Breaking the Ice

by Shayne McClendon

  When Kenzie came back, he watched her walk. She was confident, comfortable with her body. She laid down next to him on her side and he turned to face her. One fingertip traced a narrow scar from her low back to her upper thigh.

  Her voice was careful, controlled. “Gross, huh? I’m covered in them, most of them are lighter now, thank god.” There was a scar on her shoulder, another at her hairline, one on the side of her wrist.

  “They aren’t gross. More like battle scars. You must have been in a lot of pain, Kenzie.”

  “I can’t really describe the pain. The neck and shoulder were bad, the hip was worse. The humiliation was on par with the physical pain, though. Thadias was buckled in the backseat and I’m so glad I remembered to tell him before we got on the road.”

  Her eyes were sad as she looked past him. “He barely had a scratch but still gets headaches from hitting his head. Dad was pretty fucked up, mostly bruises, but he was lit and didn’t tense. I wasn’t buckled. I was trying to get Dad to pull over and let me drive home. I braced for it when I saw the concrete piling and knew he was going to hit it. Boy, did he hit it.”

  She sighed and he remembered the whispers around town back then.

  “I was twelve, still lightweight. I hit the windshield, went through it, and then hit the piling.” Her short laugh was bitter. “I’m lucky like that.”

  “How long were you in the hospital? I know you missed the rest of that school year.”

  “Almost a month after the two surgeries. Right around the time I would have gone to finals for figure skating. They would have kept me longer but I couldn’t leave the others alone with our mother.” She rolled to her back and put her hands behind her head.

  “I lied when they asked about the pain…made my mother sign me out. She went back to bed. Dad was locked up eight months that time. I slept on our downstairs couch, taught my sisters how to cook. We ate a lot of macaroni and cheese until they learned but they were eating and that was what mattered. A neighbor brought groceries. I paid the hands to take the cows to auction.”

  She gathered up her hair and twisted it to the side. “Once I was able to drive, I did. Bubba and Dave wouldn’t pull me over, even though I was three years from getting a license. That’s when I met Bob. He saw me with the kids, loading groceries in the back of the truck.”

  A small smile flitted over her lips. “He asked where my parents were. I told him they were unavailable. Later that day, he showed up at my house with a wheelchair, said to baby the hip when I could. His wife cut all the kids’ hair. I was…broken when Susan died a couple of years ago. Bob would walk the property, talk to the hands, and move things along. I love him to death.”

  Diesel was quiet for a long time and MacKenzie turned to look at him. “Don’t do it, Diesel.” Her teeth were gritted and she looked suddenly furious.

  “Don’t do what?”

  “Don’t you dare feel sorry for me. I don’t need it and I don’t want it. Every single thing I’ve been through made me stronger. They’re smart and grounded. Every one of them got scholarships for college. We could have all been losers. Alcoholics, drug-addicted, opening our legs for anyone who took an interest, stuck in this town and this life. I have one more baby bird to push out of the nest and then I’ll be free.”

  “That’s a lot of sacrifice…and your life is on hold. Don’t you resent it?”

  “I resent my parents for popping out child after child without a clue how to care for them. I resent a town that let my father drink and drive over and over again. I resent the pitying looks we got while people pretended there was nothing wrong in my house. I resent people thinking they know me, know my brother and sisters, simply because our last name is Rhodes. I will fight tooth and nail to get them out of this town, into a life that will actually mean something.”

  She suddenly climbed over him and straddled his hips, her warm mound settled over the length of his cock and he hissed air through his teeth. “Enough conversation. Condom?”

  “Aren’t you sore, Kenzie?”

  “Condom?” she said again more forcefully. He pointed to the side table drawer and she found them. Ripping it open she handed it to him and laughed as she added the wrapper to the dozen already in the wastebasket. “Wow, Diesel, I’m impressed. Have you bought stock in Trojan yet?”

  At his embarrassed look she said, “I don’t care how many women you’ve been with or how many more you’ll be with after tonight.” She guided his cock into her body and he gasped. His hands settled on her hips. “I’m not naïve, Diesel. You’re a man, a LeBlanc, and fucking is what you do. You’re my first and will likely be my only for a long time.”

  Kenzie planned on getting as much from this experience as possible. As she found her rhythm, working her body over him, enjoying watching Diesel’s face under her, she knew she’d made the right decision. She’d had a crush on Diesel since sixth grade and there was going to be serious heartache when this was over.

  She’d always have the memory. Fuck the rest.

  She came twice before he let go of his control and surged up into her hard, her name a groan on his lips. He pulled her down beside him when he caught his breath and wrapped his body around her.

  She didn’t plan to but she pushed back into him and fell asleep.

  In the middle of the night, she woke to Diesel’s movements against her back. She thought he was still asleep when he entered her and slid his hand down her stomach to play over her folds. Already, she was wet for him. His strokes increased steadily in strength until she was coming hard, gasping his name as his own orgasm stole his control.

  It was only when his breathing leveled and he drifted back to sleep that Kenzie realized they hadn’t used a condom. Fighting down the panic, she gave herself a mental shake and thought, “God certainly has an unusual sense of humor where I’m concerned.”

  When she was certain he was deeply asleep, she slipped from the bed and got dressed. Allowing herself one last look at his dark good looks against the white sheets, she smiled sadly.

  Then she let herself out.

  Chapter Four

  Walking the mile back to her truck, she called her brother. Groggy at pre-dawn, she let him wake up a moment.

  “Kenzie? Where are you?”

  “Hey there, Thad. Can you bring the dually and a tow chain? I’m stuck on the main road. I’m sorry to have to wake you.”

  Thad showed up fifteen minutes later wearing sweats and sneakers. She kissed his cheek then burst into tears. He hugged her tight.

  “What is it, Kenzie? You never cry…tell me what’s wrong.”

  She shook her head and wiped her face. Giving him a smile and a shoulder shrug, she hooked up the truck and towed it back to her place.

  Back to her real life.

  When Diesel woke hours later, sunlight was on the bed…Kenzie wasn’t. He knew she’d left because she didn’t want there to be awkwardness between them. He probably knew more about her than most people; he doubted she’d like that vulnerability.

  He reached out to touch the place where her head had been, stroking the indentation.

  As he pulled back the blanket to get up, he knew something wasn’t right. He’d obviously had sex with Kenzie again during the night but there was no condom to be found. Surely, he hadn’t…he never did that.

  You fucked up real big, Diesel. Go fix it.

  He showered and changed, snatched his keys off the table. It was then he realized Kenzie had walked back to her truck. Most likely before the sun came up.

  You suck on so many different levels right now.

  Diesel drove over to her house and one of the hands said she’d gone skating. The pond was a good fifteen minute drive and he used the time to think about the night before.

  He’d taken her virginity. That was no small thing.

  He called his older brother Douglas and started the conversation with, “Which Rhodes girl tried to get you to take her virginity?”

  “Dude, not cool. Where the hell did you
hear about that?”

  “Digger, it doesn’t matter. I…I slept with MacKenzie Rhodes last night. It surprised the fuck out of me when she turned out to be a virgin. She didn’t give me a word of warning.”

  Digger sighed heavily. “You what? Oh, hell. Kat…Katya. My god that was the most difficult decision of my life. I don’t think anyone could possibly understand the temptation involved. She was, is, so gorgeous. They grow women real pretty in that family.”

  “I know they do. Cristiana made the attempt with Damien, I’m assuming?” Diesel asked bluntly.

  “Oh, fuck me, did MacKenzie tell you that? What did she say? What did you say?” His brother groaned.

  Diesel laughed. “I had no idea how to respond to much of anything she told me last night. She said she didn’t tell me because LeBlanc men don’t deflower virgins. She said two of her sisters could attest. Since Kat and Cristi are twins, makes sense they’d try to tag team the two of you.”

  Douglas and Damien were twins, the oldest LeBlanc siblings at twenty-seven. They lived in Green Bay and ran an auction house.

  “Jesus…man, it was a bad scene. We did assume they were experienced, though I’m not proud of it. We took them up to the cabin. Kat was more responsive than any other woman I’ve been with. I still remember how good she smelled. When we found out, everything came to a grinding halt, and they were humiliated. We handled it all wrong.”

  “Sounds like it.”

  “We drove them home. No one said a word but Damien and I knew we’d hurt them. When they got out of the car they told us quietly that they thought we’d be a perfect match sexually…two women with morals with two of the morally bankrupt LeBlanc men.”

  There was a long pause, “Diesel, I’ve thought about it for the last six months and the two women I’ve slept with were nothing more than white noise. Damien is the same. Those Rhodes women are pretty memorable.”

  Diesel was quiet for a moment, “Yeah, I think you might be right about that. We should warn Dean about Jaqueline…if they consider us the safest bet for losing their virginity, Jackie might hone in on him.”

  He pulled into the pond parking area and watched Kenzie skate. She was wearing leggings and a sweatshirt. She was beautiful, graceful.

  “Later, Digger. I’m looking at one of the Rhodes women now.”

  He flipped the phone shut and got out with his skates. Sitting on the log to lace up, he knew the moment she noticed him. Her movements stilled and she gathered herself primly with her hands crossed.

  “Good morning, Kenzie. Why didn’t you wake me up before you left?”

  MacKenzie raised her eyebrow mockingly. “I bet you never ask that question the morning after. You have no reason to treat me any differently than your other…whatever they are.”

  She started skating again, moving fast and making dizzying circles.

  Diesel stood and skated out to her, catching her as she passed and pulling her to him. “Did I take you without a condom, Kenzie?”

  The abruptness of her stop and the question had her blushing hot. “Yes, but its fine. I’m on the pill if that’s what you’re worried about. I’m sure you’re normally careful but if I need to get tested or something, let me know. I think you can feel pretty confident that I’m not carrying anything.”

  She yanked her arm and he released her. She skated backwards away from him and he felt the insane urge to chase her, take her, possess her.

  As she moved, so did Diesel. He mirrored her until she grew frustrated. “What do you want, Diesel? You got what you wanted even if it wasn’t under conditions you would have liked. I’m not going all clingy and desperate, not asking you for anything, so what is it?”

  “I have no idea,” he said honestly. She skated to a stop and came toward him. Going on tiptoe, she pulled his head down for a kiss and everything about her mowed him down from the inside out. What was it about this woman?

  She broke the kiss and said against his lips, “Diesel, you have a great future in front of you. Go enjoy it and don’t worry about me. I expect nothing from you. I knew what I was doing when I told you to take me home with you. I have no regrets. Not a single one.”

  The feel of her fingers in his hair made him want to beg but he didn’t know for what and he didn’t want her to think he was weak.

  “I knew you’d make my first time memorable and you did. You expected to use me, Diesel. You figured we’d play until you left and when I didn’t give in easily, it made you want me more…but your reasons didn’t change. You wanted my body…not my heart or my mind…and my body is exactly what you got.” Her smile was sincere though a little sad.

  “I hope one day you see the fairness in the fact that I used you a little, too.” She kissed him again and went to remove her skates.

  He followed and stopped a few feet away, his hands on his hips. “Will I see you again before I leave tomorrow, MacKenzie?”

  She looked up and smiled. It didn’t reach her eyes. “Sure, you can dance with me tonight if you want. Then I’ll wish you luck and tell you goodbye.” Kenzie stood in her boots and smoothed her hand over the flannel shirt that covered his chest. Then she leaned in and kissed him over his heart.

  “Thank you again. I appreciate how you treated me more than you can understand as a man. I wouldn’t have trusted anyone else.” She stroked his cheek then walked quickly to her truck.

  He felt confused and twisted up inside as he watched her drive away.

  Later, he watched Kenzie in the bar, waiting for the right moment to dance with her. He was crossing to her when Stupid Boy started to play and he thought that for some reason, in this situation, it was a fitting song.

  She put down her tray and let Diesel lead her to the dance floor. He gathered her close as they moved together, his arms holding her tighter than necessary but he couldn’t make himself loosen them.

  At one point, she sighed and he lifted her chin to see her face. Not understanding what he saw there, he kissed her gently.

  When the song ended they stopped in the middle of the dance floor.

  She put her hands on either side of his face and whispered, “You’re a good man, Diesel. Make sure you remember that when you’re a famous hockey player. Be happy. Be safe.” She lifted and gave him one more kiss. “Goodbye, Diesel.”

  She stepped away and he let her go, fighting instincts he didn’t know how to interpret…and didn’t know if he wanted to. Kenzie was gorgeous and smart – sex with her had been the best of his life – but they were young and he had too many plans to let himself get derailed by a girl from his hometown.

  He watched her wave to Bob as she ducked down the hall to the employee parking lot out back.

  Diesel wanted to go after her.

  He didn’t.

  Chapter Five

  Present day…

  MacKenzie watched riveted when Diesel’s team took the NCAA Conference Championship his senior year of college, screaming and cheering for him with Thad by her side. She’d bought the DVD of Wisconsin’s season and watched it sometimes when she felt like touring memory lane.

  She’d worn Badger colors proudly even after they moved to Boston. He’d been drafted by the Devils and she’d followed his career; happy his dreams were coming true.

  Thadias scored so high on his SATs he’d gotten into Harvard and she moved with him to Cambridge. He made it clear it was the only way he was going. There was no way he was leaving her alone in their hometown. He told Kenzie that if she really wanted him to get the best education possible, she’d better pack.

  She was incredibly proud of him.

  She worked at a local sports bar three nights a week and went to night school the other four to earn her degree in education. Kenzie pulled in enough tips to pay for their living expenses while Thadias attended classes.

  She didn’t want him to work – not with his class load. The fact that he was home at night while she worked and went to school was more than she had any right to ask of a young man who should have been havi
ng the time of his life, not worrying about his older sister.

  Thad disagreed with her need to do everything alone. It was the only thing they fought over.

  When she came down with pneumonia, he insisted she call Diesel but she wouldn’t, she couldn’t. She fought her way through it and afterward, she knew it had been the right decision.

  Two months after the night they’d spent together, Kenzie could no longer pretend she wasn’t pregnant. She hid it for another two months until the baby moved the first time. There was no denying the situation then.

  She talked to Thadias first and had to beg him not to call the LeBlancs. There was no doubt he’d been worried. She was pregnant and scared, though she wouldn’t admit it to anyone, not even herself. He’d already gotten his acceptance to Harvard and they figured out a game plan together.

  Next, Kenzie sat with Bob Zeller and swore him to secrecy. He put her to work in his back office and helped her find a place to live in Boston. They moved in the early summer because it was getting harder and harder to hide the fact she was carrying Diesel LeBlanc’s baby.

  Over that summer and fall, she continued to handle everything for her parents’ place remotely, taking a small salary until she had the baby and went back to work.

  As soon as she was fully on her feet, she hired a manager to take over the running of the place and then severed all connection with them. The sad part was that they likely didn’t even notice.

  None of her siblings maintained ties to their parents. In fact, the only person they spoke to from back home was Bob, who called twice a week and had been out to visit several times.

  Throughout the years they’d lived in that town, none of the Rhodes had friends outside of one another. Their family was too much on the fringe, too talked about for anyone their age to take a chance at being in the center of the gossip – both real and imagined – that surrounded them.

  It wasn’t hard to leave North Dakota. It had been even easier to stay away.